My Weekly Rant !!

February 12th '99

*sings* “when she was 3, her Barbies always did it on the first date …….”
*ahem* sorry about that, you caught me in a Barenaked Ladies moment, but never mind eh ?? Well welcome back to my new styled, completely overhauled, sparkling newly designed Rant. Well ok, I have to admit, I haven’t done anything to it, but it got you thinking that maybe you had missed something right ? Ok ok, I’ll get on with it, so sit back, relax, NO WAKE UP, not that relaxed !!!
This weeks Rant takes us to the past weekend, and the fun that ensued. We decided to have a party. Yes completely unlike any other student activity, so we invited people, made vodka jellies, got some music and some beverages, and waited. Now between the 5 of us, we had invited quite a large number of people, and so we expected quite a turn out. However not all of our expectations were fulfilled. Nope, quite a few people turned up, but a lot of the people that we invited didn’t turn up, which was quite upsetting. However with the people that we had, we continued.
First we started on our well-prepared and cunningly planned vodka-jellies. They were DISGUSTING !! We found 2 people that enjoyed them, Steve who ate far too many and paid for it later, and Pete, who didn’t have a chance to eat too many as they were all devoured. However we tried to bribe them with our well-planned alcohol free jelly for drivers and such. Now this would have been fine, except the easily worded instructions weren’t *exactly* followed. No, instead for 2 packets of jelly, we used almost the amount of water required for 1 pack. The jelly was fine, a nice orange bouncy tasty treat, that took a few minutes to chew as it made your teeth spring apart with every chomp. Boy did that stuff bounce though !!! They could make children’s toys from those things !!
OK so the night went on. People complained about the music a bit. OK so I don’t have the best taste in music but I had a party charty cd on random so I think any criticism was a little uncalled for !! Then, however, it started to go bad. Now you would think that it couldn’t get to much worse, but no. I have to be kind as people read this and I don’t want to go bad mouthing people that are bigger than me, but just ask me some of the stuff that happened. The ultimate one, though, is during the night, the toilet, a most necessary and useful accessory in any house, decided to DIE !! Yes of all nights. Do we know how to throw a party or what ?? Some TINY minuscule part broke and the toilet decided to overflow, flooding the little bathroom. It’s a shame that no one got a photo of me stopping the water from gushing from the toilet. However we managed to find the water tap and we were forced to turn the water off in the house. Now imagine the situation, no toilet, no water and a party. You can see the problems, to our rescue jumped Naomi !! It was not unusual to see after this, trips of people rushing over to her hose to use her *facilities* !! Lucky for us Naomi was invited eh ??
Well, we got the toilet repaired the next morning, the plumber arriving at 8am !! Yes nice and early !! After a night drinking, not welcomed by some who sleep near the door *ME* !!! But oh well, we have water and a toilet so all is well !!
So there you have it, we had a party, people didn’t come, beer was drunk, cd’s disappeared, things were broke, water gushing, bit bag of empty bottles and early mornings. Can I party or what ?? However we had a fry up, cooked by yours truly Sunday morning and it was beautiful and hit the spot, with select guests enjoying the fine exquisite food, including our saviour Naomi !! And all was well with the world !! ;0)
Then back to school ………….. and reality !!
Darren ;0)