P.T.S.D.         Most people don't know or have never heard of this but to those who have it is very disturbing and very scary. P.T.S.D is Post Traumatic Stress Disorder which so many people suffer from but seldom ever talked about and I hope to shed some light on this disorder. All I ask from those reading this is that you try to put yourself in the place of these people that suffer from this .     Imagine if you can being sound asleep and all comfortable in bed and then being awaken by hearing yourself screaming and sobbing uncontrollably. The sweat  pouring off from you the fear of something scared you so much you are shaking and cant stop. Imagine someone saying something to you and you all of a sudden getting this scared feeling and you start remembering and in some cases picturing a traumatic thing that happened in you life becoming so real AGAIN. If you can do this it is then and only then you can imagine what it is like for the people that suffer from this disorder. P.T.S.D. is usually connected  with people that fought in the wars we have had but it is now being recognized for women that have been raped and for people that have molested. Basically it is anyone that has had a traumatic experience in their life and I hate to say it is exclusively to the above I mentioned. But they all amount to the same . It is a disorder that is hard to handle ,hard to deal with and harder to keep going on if they continue. Who wants to have nightmares constantly? Who wants to feel so scared all the time? How will people treat you when they hear you suffer from this disorder? Well some say who cares what other people think and my answer to them is I care because when this this happens there is a part of you that no longer feels normal and in some cases not accepted. Although people that suffer from P.T.S.D. know they are not alone with this disorder ..THEY ARE ALONE at the time it happens no one is there experiencing it but them. All they can do is try to get through that experience and go on. Easier said than done  I know . I am writing this for the purpose of therapy but also of hoping to make people aware that this disorder is real and is happening and these people aren't crazy although at times we feel that way . I also need to say that in many cases the disorder can be treated or at least some what controlled by medication. So to all of you that suffer from this disorder my heart goes out to you . This is something no one can really imagine unless they live through it.   In closing I would like to say I can speak on P.T.S.D. because I like so many others suffer from that disorder. I am trying my best to deal with it and at times I think people around me don't understand what it is like to go through this. Some people have others to hold them while they are scared or people to listen to them if they need to talk they are the lucky ones. There are so many that because of this have either withdrawn from people or people have withdrawn from them they are try to get better but don't know where to go or sometimes wonder if there is a place for them anymore. I say this not for pity but for the fact that this is so true in many cases. All we ask is that people around us try to stick with us and help if they can . I know this can be tiring but we are good people just that we had bad experiences and we are dealing with them as best as we can. I look back at my life and I have seen a pattern that at times I feel so loved and maybe  love too much that I tend to scare or overload people close to me with my love for that I say to you "I am so sorry" it isn't done intentional but rather maybe out of fear that or the need to be loved. But to the people that suffer from P.T.S.D.  I ask that you do what the logo below says  just for them . Scared When I wake scared I want to be held This feeling takes over me as I lay here The sweat that you see isn't because I am warm But because I am scared that it happened again   Tears are flowing and I just cant stop them Why was I picked for this to happen to My hands  tremble and I wish they would stop How long does it have to be like this   I am told this may be a lifetime thing The fear the tears the scared feeling I say why oh why do i have to relive this again For God knows it hurt the first time around   I go on and  do the best I can knowing Someday Someway I will get through this With prayers and determination I just wished I had someone to hold me for  I  am SCARED Thoughts by Host James   for us wont you?