Before the show...

      C: Well, first, let's explain what's goin' on. The X-Files hasen't been on for a month, and the last time it was on, Mulder... DIED!!! :O But of course we all know he'll be back.
      S: Sure, and we all also know you're stupid. Oh, wait! This isn't just *any* debate! This is THE X-FILES debate!
      C: Anyways, we're going to tell you our thoughts and predictions about tonight's hugely crucial episode.
      S: Yes, all us X-philes have...
      C: Sam cannot think, so I'm going to write until her brain power returns.
      S: Thank you.
      C: Well, let's first say our hopes for tonight's episode. We know Mulder is returning alive. I want him to be, like, conscious, and talk to Scully. I hope he's not in a coma or something.
      S: That would be *so* wrong. But, it'd still be a step up from him naked in that chair with his cheeks being ripped off, I'll tell you what.
      C: I HATE THAT! Why in God's name would aliens feel the need to pull people's cheeks off their faces?! Poor Mulder.
      S: I think that's just Chris Carter's damn make up artists needing to do something because there haven't been many gross scenes, you know?
      C: True dat. Hmm.. I guess my only hopes for this episode is seeing Mulder alive and hearing him speak.
      S: Oh man! We haven't heard his sweet sweet voice in so long!!!
      C: Now, here's our predictions for this episode. It should be fun afterwards to see how many don't come true!

      Casey's Predictions

      ~They'll go to dig up Mulder from his grave and he won't be there
      ~Krychek will have the key to bring Mulder back
      ~There'll be some revelation dealing w/ Scully's pregnancy
      ~We won't see living Mulder till the last 5 minutes


      Sam's Predictions

      * Nothing good (by my standards) or relevent to Mulder's return will happen until the very last moments of the episode
      * If Mulder does return, and he better, he gives Scully a big hug :)
      * Scully then tells him she's having his child
      * Unsettling things happen throughout the episode that force me to make my confused and upset face


      Casey's Mom's Predictions

      - The "dude that got snatched up" returns and heals Mulder
      - Mulder is found somewhere and taken to a hospital
      - Krychek "mystifies" her, and she doesn't understand him, therefore cannot make predictions about him
      - Scully will go into premature labor


      Post Episode...

      S: Huminah, huminah, huminah... we...we heard...we heard him speak! And he...heheheheheheeheheheh, mwahahahahahahah!!!
      C: Oh... my God. He opened his eyes... he talked...... oh God it was so great!!! It was... oh wow. Wowee zowies. There are no words. There are just no words.
      S: No there aren't, man. Phew! So how about our predictions? You and me did pretty alright, huh? I think you had the most correct ones, though.
      C: We did very well. Wow. I just can't believe it. You should've seen Sam and I when Mulder's hand moved. We both almost had coronaries. What is there to say? After so many Mulder-deprived months and so many cruel, misleading previews, he's finally BACK! Wow. Sam and I are so happy.
      S: Yeah, you know it. Jeez, I'll tell you what, i didn't think this episode would end happily, *especially* after Krychek dropped the damn vaccine! BAH! I thought it was kind of cheezy how all of a sudden Scully figured out there was a possible way to revive Mulder, though. NOT that I'm complaining!
      C: Damn Krychek, and damn that AD Kirsh or whatever the hell his name was. I've always hated him. Doggett had his annoying moments, but all and all I was impressed w/ him in this episode. Scully was good, and... MULDER was great!!!! We can comment on Mulder again! WOOOOOOOOO!!!!!
      S: Yipee!!! And just think, *next* episode we'll be able to hear him yell, and he'll probably run around a lot, and he'll push J-Dog around, and HIM AND SCULLY WILL GIVE EACHOTHER A BIG DAMN MOTHER FUCKING HUG!!!
      C: Sam just *loves* those hugs! Yes yes, I'm up for seeing J-Dogg get pushed around by Mulder. Heh heh heh. From now on I will treasure everything Mulder does, every word he says, and every time he breathes. :D I wonder when Scully's gonna have her love child w/ Mulder.
      S: That's a good question, but I don't think I can concentrate on anything that doesn't directly involve Mulder... going for so long without him was like giving something up for lent. Once you can have it again, it's so treasured. Oh Mulder. Oh Spooky Mulder. I sing for you. I eat for you. I.....live for you. (Sam bows her head in a silent prayer)
      C: Hey man, I love Mulder! Do you?
      S: Hehehehe, no...once again, I'll tell you what! If Mulder wasn't played by Mr. David Duchovny, I don't know if I'd be so content right now. No need to think about things like that, though. It's happy times now.
      C: Well of course we wouldn't be this spastic right now if David didn't play Mulder. David is the hottest man in the world, and he makes Mulder the wonderful beautiful person that he is. I am *SO* in love with Mulder right now, you have no idea. The events of 15 minutes ago have to be the happiest in X-Files history. Fans around the world rejoice.
      S: Yeah... . So...what now? I bet the next episode is going to be like old times and it's going to be like nothing happened. Oy, the ways of the Files of X. Heheh.
      C: Seeing Mulder and J-Dogg together is gonna be a bit strange for me. The next episode is called "Three Words." Makes you wonder! Three words... what could they be??? Like, I dunno... I LOVE YOU?!?!?!
      S: I love you too, man. :) Big hug!
      C: Ew.
      S: Hehehehe. So, let us take a quick look at the hopes we listed above, shall we?
      (Casey and Sam scroll up & read the beginning of this page)
      C: Well my friend, it seems all our hopes came true! Mulder was conscious and he talked!!! I have such problems typing the word "conscious".
      S: That's okay! Mulder's alive!
      C: You are absolutely right. :D :D :D Maybe we should let our readers know what happened in the last 30 seconds of the show.
      S: I dunno, I think if they didn't see the episode, they should go to an episode synopsis on the net. What page has good ones, man? We can just put a link up here, can we not? Spare our devoted readers some trouble? What do you say, Cadet? >:)
      C: Okaaaaay... well, I dunno of a good synopsis site, but the Idealist's Haven has some really great X-Files stuff, like pictures and news and all kinds of goodies. We should put it on our links page, Sam.
      S: Perhaps. :/ So, Mulder had a pretty sweet time tonight, huh Doug?
      C: I dunno if Mulder had that great a time. Scully did. J-Dogg just had a regular partay tonight, hanging out of car windows and such. WE had a pretty sweet time tonight, huh Doug?
      S: WELL, I know if *I* just woke up from a coma with the person I love sitting there holding my hand with a stunned face, tears running down their cheeks at my awakening...I think I'd be having a pretty sweet time...huh Doug?
      C: Well, one of us has gotta say it; SWEET ASS SWEET!
      S: D I A B E T I C!!!