There is no crash course that teaches you how to be a Southern belle. You can't learn the rules by reading Amy Vanderbilt. And this is one time even Ann Landers can't help. Real Southern tradition is taught at birth by doting mothers, aunts, and grandmothers and passed down from generation to generation. An outsider justdoesn't have a clue.

Never wear white shoes before Easter or after Labor Day. Only exception is if you're a bride. Bridesmaids must never wear white shoes. Their shoes should match the punch.
It doesn't matter if you marry a man who doesn't know the difference between a shrimp fork and a pickle fork; you can always teach him. Just make sure he can afford to buy you both.
Thank you notes. An essential part of being gracious and appreciative.
Never show your bossom before evening.
Never chew gum or smoke on the street.

Southern girls appreciate their natural assets:
Dewy skin
A winning smile
That unforgettable Southern drawl!

Southern girls know everybody's first name:
Honey
Darlin'
Sugar

Southern girls can teach anyone to flirt. . .
Slowly lower your eyelashes
Listen carefully to everything he says
Speak r-e-a-l slow

A Southern belle can sing your praises to the sky or slash you completely apart with the sweetest smile and the nicest-sounding words you could ever hope to hear.
No Southern lady would ever utter a word that's harsh. So you have to understand the six basic words that are the heart and soul of any belle's vocabulary.

LOVELY--"She comes from a lovely family."
"Her people are lovely."

PRECIOUS--A high compliment.
"You're so precious to think of me."
"Aren't you just the most precious thing."

DARLIN'--Also a high complimant, to be used along with precious for better emphasis.
"Your daughter is darlin' and she wears the most precious clothes."

CUTE--Not exactly a high compliment, but not a complete put-down either.
"Don't you look cute!" (This means you still have an outside chance of making Kappa Kappa Gamma, but you're not as solid as you would be if you looked precious or darlin'.)

SWEET--The kiss of death.
"Who's that sweet little thing in the corner. Just look at that sweet little dress she's wearing!" (You can be sure she's thinking the girl has got to be a legacy, why else would she be in the Chi O house?)

NICE--The kiss of death with the coffin sealed.
"Well, I don't know her well, but she seems perfectly nice." (She'd better think about volunteering at the hospital because she's never going to make the Junior Auxiliary.)

Even belles form the loveliest of Southern families sometimes move away. They go to places like New York, Chicago, or Los Angeles and they get caught up in a world where ladies are called women and nobody wears pantyhose in the summer.
Before you know it, these belles start to like the idea of wash-and-wear hair and throwing away their eyeliner. They even open their own car doors and pretend that "red eye" refers to a late-night plane flight and not a gravy that goes with ham.
But there's something about a Southern upbringing that never completely goes away. Ten telltale signs always give away a belle who is trying to "pass."

1. She calls the refrigerator the icebox.
2. Even if she's ninety, she calls her father "Daddy."
3. She would rather walk down Fifth Avenue naked than wear white shoes before Easter or after Labor Day.
4. She refers to a handbag as a pocketbook.
5. She doesn't have a couch, she has a sofa.
6. She drinks iced tea in the middle of a blizzard.
7. She will march for women's rights for twenty miles but she would rather die than walk two feet with a lighted cigarette.
8. She dyes her shoes to match her cocktail dress.
9. Her parties all have themes.
10. She has a deviled egg plate.

Good Southern belles don't put dark meat in their chicken salads and they don't put Miracle Whip on their tomato aspic. In fact, they would never have Miracle Whip in their refrigerators. They use mayonnaise--real homemade mayonnaise. If this isn't available, Hellman's "store bought" is a good substitute (although you might add a little lemon). Belles are not so pure in other areas: they use a lot of condensed soup mix, Cool Whip, and Marshmallow Fluff. But when it comes to mayonnaise, they are unbending.
"But I love Miracle Whip," a woman who has lived in Memphis for thirty-five years told her friends over bridge.
"My dear," one of them answered. "You were born in the Midwest, and it shows."

Most of the information on this page came from A Southern Belle Primer : Or Why Princess Margaret Will Never Be a Kappa Kappa Gamma by Maryln Schwartz.