From: trooper_666@my-deja.com
Subject: (fic)South Park 2000.
Date: 1999/10/26
Message-ID: <7v31kn$42b$1@nnrp1.deja.com>#1/1
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The following fic is completly fucked up and should not be read by
anyboy.
South Park 2000, the Post Apocalyptic fic.(With guest appearance by Duke
Nukem.)
South Park.
Year 2000.
South Park Elementry.
Mr.Garrison's Room.
(Everybody's under their desks like in Tom's Rhinoplasty.)
Mr.Garrison:Okay class, since everybody's dead except us I'm gonna leave
all you here to die so I can
get rid of those doctered photos of me molesting Mr.Ed the talking
horse.
Entire class breaks out laughing hysterically.
Mr.Garrison:You go to hell!You go to hell and you die!
Voice(O.S.):Is that the best you can do?(shotgun blast, sound of body
parts flying everywhere.)
The door breaks down and to everybodys surprise, it's Duke Nukem!
Stan:Who the f*** are you?!
Ashley:That's Duke Nukem, buttpipe!
Stan/Wendy:HEY!
Ashley:Sorry.
Duke:The question is, who is this?!(points to Mr.Garrison.)
Entire Class:Our gayass teacher who molests farm animals.
Duke:Oh.("accidenally" pulls trigger on sawed-off.BLAM!!!)
Duke:(refers to Garrisons corpse.)Oops,did I hurt you?
Everyone:Horray!
Duke:OK kids, follow me.
As everybody files out of the class Ashley looks at the remains of her
now deceased teacher.
Ashley(to corpse.):Your ass, your face, what's the difference?
Duke(O.S.):That's my line!
Ashley:Sorry.
Time Passes...
Tweek:AAAHHHH!IT'S TOO MUCH PRESSURE!
Nora puts her hand over Tweek's mouth.
Nora:Tweek, shut up, just shut up.
Tweek(scared.):Ok.
Ashley pulls out an Remington 870 12 guage shotgun, aims, and fires,
blowing a caniballistic zombie to shreads.
Duke:What the fuck?!
Ashley:I-
Duke:No, it can't be,ohmigod, it is, it's Tinkey Winkey!
Duke runs off.
Stan:Woah dude!He's actually scared of something!
Tinkey Winkey explodes into a puddle of goo and Ashley reloads her gun
just as the ground opens up all around Ashley, swallowing all but her
and Kyle.
Kyle slips on a rock and falls into the earth's core.
Kyle(while falling.):ASHLEEEEYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY!(fades out.)
Ashley:NOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ashley wakes up in her bed in a cold sweat, breathing heavily.
Kyle wakes up alongside Ashley.
Kyle:Wha,what's wrong?!
Ashley:Holy shit, that was one hell of a fucked up dream.
The End.
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