|
|
| From: s...@hotmail.com
To: spankwithlove@hotmail.com Subject: Like your site Date: Thu, 27 Dec 2001
Hi,
I have thoroughly read your web site, and I have to say
that I agree with everything that you have to say. I
think your site is well thought out and your ideas are
communicated very well.
I'm a father, 38 yrs old, that uses spanking in our home
with our two children, ages 3 and 6. I've been married
for 8 years and my wife and I share the responsibility
of spanking the children. Both my wife and I feel that
spanking is appropriate for serious offenses, and I am
sad to say that sometimes spankings are the only thing
that make our kids listen and pay attention to what we
are saying even after we have tried all other reward type
of behavior modification. Thanks for putting this
information together. It has solidified in my mind
questions on whether I should use an implement on them
when they get older and what the best position is for
their spankings. And I have resolved to leave spankings
as a discipline option for our children when they get
older as well.
I hope that this site reaches more people so that other
people who may spank now or don't spank because of whatever
reason would come to understand your common sense approach
to disciplining children.
Thanks!
|
![]()
| From: m...@aol.com
To: spankwithlove@hotmail.com Subject: My Situation Date: Mon, 24 Dec 2001
I am a 13 year old boy who still gets spanked by his mom. My father died
when I was 7 and mom assumed my discipline at that time. At first, she
spanked me with her hand on the seat of my pants.
Then shortly before my 9th birthday, I was spending a night with my mom's
best friend, Kathleen, as my mom had to work a rare night shift at the
hospital as a nurse, when I accidentally spilled my coke on her new carpet
after being told to be very careful. Fortunately, the beverage came right
out, but Kathleen was still quite upset. I apologized to Kathleen and she
said that while my apology was accepted, she was going to ask mom to spank me
when she picked me up the following morning.
I managed to fall asleep that night, but was tugged awake the next morning by
mom with Kathleen at her side. Before I was fully awake, mom had pulled
back the bed covers and was unbuttoning my pajama bottoms indicating that at
Kathleen's request, she was going to spank me on the bare bottom. I
remember the huge embarasment and mom slid my pajama bottoms off, baring me
from the waist down. Then just as quickly, I was over mom's lap getting
spanked. Having never been spanked bare before, the extra pain was quite a
shock.
On the drive home, mom discussed the spanking with me and when I admitted it
had hurt much more on the bare bottom, she nodded in agreement, explaining
that Kathleen had spanked her two sons (already grown) the same way. Mom
added that my dad had been spanked bare as a boy also and that she now
intended to do the same with me.
Mom has spanked me on the bare bottom since and now uses a hairbrush. While
it is more embarassing and hurts more, I admit that it does me more good this
way.
|
![]()
| From: d...@aol.com
To: spankwithlove@hotmail.com Subject: Spanking Date: Thu, 20 Dec 2001
Hello.
I am fifteen years old and I want to express my opinion
regarding spanking children.
I never thought someone would have to read a website full
of information on discipline to learn how to correctly
spank a child. It's insane. Listing all the implements,
positions, strategies.... I was appalled.
I used to think that once I was married and had children
I would most definitely spank them, but very rarely. But
I was soo turned off by the feedback from other people
explaining their experiences so in detail and all of the
pictures meant to be funny i suppose, that I am really
not sure if i want spanking as an option anymore.
I was most definitely spanked as a child. Many images in
my head which it hurts to recall. I remember a whole year
after one, I wanted to cry every time I thought about it.
Let me just say that when you hit a kid with a belt...
it is not called a "spanking." That, ladies and gentlemen,
is a beating, and noone should think about hitting their
kids with a belt for minor offenses. Half of the time,
no no.... 75 percent of the time, i had NO IDEA what I
was getting hit for.
It is not right to spank a kid because the OTHER child
is crying and you ASSUME it is their fault. And also,
anyone who chooses to spank their children in front of
their friends, family, and other people are really cruel.
It is so extremely embarrassing, and just makes the
child form a terrible disliking to any form of discipline
and their parents.
It would be nice to explain why a child is getting a
spanking. If they understand, wonderful. I was always
hit out of anger, most of the time, and didn't see why
I should be punished.
And one more thing, before this site........ i had
absolutely no clue that spanking teenagers was even an
option! And why teenagers would be sad because they
WANT spankings and don't get any! AH! I was disturbed
when reading the feedback with people saying how they
are in college, or in their 20s, IN THEIR 2Os, still
getting spankings. I have never heard of that. That is
so extremely strange.
I am sorry if anything I said offends anyone, i am merely
speaking my mind.
Supposedly, according to my parents, and turned out
great or something, and am their best child. (thought
they deny EVER laying a hand on me)
Well, though they may say I am a good kid, whether it be
due to spankings or not, i have deeep emotional scars and
it even brings me to tears at some moments.
That's all I wanted to say.
I think, spanking from maybe age 3 to possibly 9 is
sufficient. There are other ways to discipline kids or
to make people understand.
Also, people referring to the scripture in the Bible
speaking of the ROD.. it compares parents to loving
sheperds. And the sheperd's rod was used to gently direct
the sheep when one or two would stray from the flock.
They didn't beat the poor lambs with it, they steered
them in the right direction. Just thought the parents
who refer to those scriptures should know that.
|
![]()
| From: m...@yahoo.com
To: spankwithlove@hotmail.com Subject: (none) Date: Wed, 19 Dec 2001
Thank you for your website. It provides support for
those of us who choose to spank our children. I was
spanked as a child by both of my parents. It was the
main form of punishment and was very memorable. I grew
up in the 1970s and in those days, everyone was
spanked or smacked by their parents.
My father spanked me with his belt, for different
lengths of time depending on what I had done. It was
bare bottomed and it did not matter who was in our
house. If I was naughty, I paid the price, or rather
my bottom did.
My mother usually used a hairbrush, usually on my bare
bottom. Sometimes she smacked my hand with a slipper
or wooden spoon. In public she smacked my hand or
clothed bottom with her hand.
My husband was spanked by his father with a belt.
Today my husband and I have 3 children and we too use
spanking as our main form of punishment for our
(usually well behaved) children. Disobedience and
cheek are not tolerated.
We spank bare bottomed with a wooden ping pong paddle,
never in public and usually they get 2-3 spanks per
year of age. So my 9 year old gets around 20, the 7
year old gets around 15 and the 6 year old gets 12. It
is quick retribution and it works.
Thanks again for your support
Our methods are frowned upon by some but our children
don't usually need to be told to do something twice.
|
![]()
| From: w...@lineone.net
To: spankwithlove@hotmail.com Subject: Spanking Date: Sun, 9 Dec 2001
I came across your site as a sequence of accidents that started,
oddly enough, with research into the Russian revolution! Anyway,
it's a good site. What I noticed was that the hairbrush technique
was different to my experience. I was only smacked once with the
brush, and then it was with the bristles. It stang like mad and
hurt for some time afterwards. Is this unheard of?
Apart from that, my experience tells me that spankings are very
random. Sometimes I just got a light smack on my jeans on the
spot. Other times, I had to stand in the corner before the
smacking and then take it bare-bottomed. All proper smackings
were bare bottomed for me. It was more embarrasing, especially
if the trousers and underpants were off, too. The more clothes
I had removed the more effective it was. One earlier comment
from last December notes how in boys (I am one) the scrotum
dangled in a way that felt vulnerable. This certainly takes
you down a peg.
My biggest spanking came when I was 9. I broke a window half
deliberately (through a stone slightly harder than I should
have) in irritation, something I did not usually do. My parents
explained why I had to punished. I was only wearing shorts,
t-shirt and socks at the time, so this time I received the
smacking totally naked. Usually it was naked below the waist-
having the socks removed also makes you feel vulnerable and
embarrased. It certainly shut me up. Afterwards I had to
stand in the corner for ten minutes bare-bottomed. If I had
done something that humiliated another person I took the
smacking and cornertime in front of them if they wished.
Then I got my clothes back and the whole thing was left in
the past.
It was always with a hand. I do not regard it as abuse, only
discipline. I was spanked fairly infrequently, too. This made
the ritual of having your trousers and underwear pulled down
more humiliating because I never got used to it. I was rarely
allowed to choose a punishment- if I had it would not really
have been punishment.
|
![]()
| From: disciplinarian_dad@hotmail.com
To: spankwithlove@hotmail.com Subject: balance Date: Tue, 04 Dec 2001
Note: this letter is not anonymized by special request.
I have just read the article about balance and would like to offer
some comments. I do agree that minor punishment should certainly
outweigh severe punishment, but I think that getting too scientific
about it misses the point that parenting is not so much a science as
it is an art.
I have observed many parents, in stores or other public places,
whose children are "acting up" in some way (at least the parent
considers it that) when, in reality, they are just being kids!
I have seen mothers and fathers exasperated, frazzeled and making
dire threats of "time outs" or other kinds of punishment (most
of them are afraid to say the word "spank" in a public place for
fear of being stoned) when they could very easily have stopped
the situation by simply picking the child up, giving them a hug
and a kiss and saying "I love you and as soon as I am finished
standing in this line, we can talk about what you want." Please
feel free to put your own statement in my quotes. My point is
that parents expect kids to act like miniature adults and they
forget that they are kids. Kids are driven by seeking immediate
gratification ,for one thing, and it is a delicate task to teach
them that is not how the world functions.
Many of the "minor" punishments are, in my own opinion, totally
unnecessary if only the adult would learn to think like a child
instead expecting the reverse. I have already written about my
own use of spanking and I would be happy to discuss this, or other
subjects, in email.
|
![]()
| From: v...@aol.com
To: spankwithlove@hotmail.com Subject: 18 and still spanked Date: Mon, 3 Dec 2001
Hi. I found your website a few months ago and I just wanted to say
thanks. I was spanked as a child from the ages of 3 to 13. I was
spanked on my bare bottom over my mom's lap, and mom would take
down my panties and always spank with her hand until my bottom was
red and she decided I had had enough. I got my last spanking on the
day of my 13th birthday. She said that I was finally a teenager and
that I was too old for spankings anymore. She gave me a "birthday
spanking", and it wasn't by all means a joke, just a reminder that
I was to still follow the rules and I would still be punished, just
not by spankings. I was mostly grounded. I didn't like getting
grounded. It made me feel hurt and mostly frustrated.
When I found your website and saw all the older teenagers that felt
the same way, I realized I had to do something. My grades in school
were slipping, and now that I'm in college that is no laughing matter.
My mom didn't even think of punishing me anymore. Finally, we had
a long talk. I showed her your website and she agreed. I was to be
spanked again, and I would continue to be as long as I lived in her
house.
About two hours ago, mom made me go to my room and wait for her.
Then she came in and put me over my lap. She flipped up my skirt and
pulled down my panties just like she always did as a child. She
spanked me with her hand for a long time, and it brought me to tears.
Then she added a paddle, because she said I was older now, and a hand
spanking was not enough. She paddled me until I was crying hard.
Then she let me up, hugged me, and told me to sit in the corner until
i had calmed down. The last part of my punishment was to write to
you, thanking you for bringing us closer together. So here I am, at
my computer, sitting with a sore butt, writing an email. Thank you
very much. I'd also like to talk to other teenagers and young adults
who are still spanked at home. Is there a group that makes this
possible?
|
![]()
| From: s...@haefft.de
To: spankwithlove@hotmail.com Subject: How we spank Date: Sun, 02 Dec 2001
Dear Sir or Madam,
I have read your site for some months with much interest. In my opinion, such
sites are very important for parents who have decided to spank their children.
And, as you pointed out on your site, there are many parents all around the
world who do so. You help to prevent any sort of abusive spanking and, thus, to
create an atmosphere in which spanking is carried out with love, an atmosphere
which is unfortunately very rare.
I have got two daughters, one now aged 7 years, the other 4 years. When my wife
and I got our first child, we agreed to use spanking as a way of disciplining
our children. But we also agreed to use it only as an ultima ratio if any other
measure should not work. Of course we did not use spanking when our children
were under two years old, especially since it was not necessary. But as the two
became older, they misbehaved more and it was not enough to tell them they
should stop. Consequently, my wife and I started to use force in order to
discipline our daughters. At the begin, it was enough to give them a fast smack
on their hands or their bottoms. This worked until they were about three years
old. I suppose that children get a stronger will from that age on and then, they
try to do what comes in their mind. But this, I am afraid, includes actions
being dangerous for either themselves or others. So we started to spank our
children when they misbehaved in any more serious way.
We have always followed the same procedure since that time and today reading
your site I can see that we did right. When one of our children is going to
misbehave seriously we tell her she will receive a spanking if she continues.
Most times, this is enough we have to do. If she does not listen to us and
misbehaves, either my wife or I take her to an other room, which is almost
always her bedroom, to make sure that the spanking is carried out in private.
Then she is asked why she will be spanked and we explain it to her, so she
really understands it. This being done, her trousers and her underwear are taken
to her ankles or, when she wears a dress or skirt, the skirt is turned up and
the underwear is removed completely. After that she is turned over her parent‘s
lap the parent being seated on a bed or couch or, if these should not be
available, on a chair. She always gets so many slaps until she really cries.
Then she gets one or two more and then the spanking is ended. We always hug her
and hold her on our arm until she has calmed down. Then we leave the room in
which the spanking has been administered and she has to stay her for up to ten
minutes sitting bare-bottomed on a chair and not being allowed to rub. The time
being gone, we come to her again and put her cloths on again. When we leave the
room with her, "the bill has been paid". The spanking will not be mentioned any
more nor the offence having caused it. Both our two daughters know that and I am
sure that this system allows us to live happily together.
(...)
|
![]()
| From: e...@aol.com
To: spankwithlove@hotmail.com Subject: (no subject) Date: Sat, 1 Dec 2001
i found your site while looking up research on spankings and i
am impressed with what i found. Your site has a lot of useful
information on it and it was interesting to see the techniques
and positions. i always thought over the knee and over the lap
was the same thing. i think that spankings are a good form of
punishment and should be administered as long as needed as agreed
by parent and child. i live at home and at eighteen, recently
got a spanking on my bare bottom with a ping pong paddle (minus
the ball). it hurt quite a bit and made my bottom very red and
hard to sit on but it was needed and it helped my behavior.
spankings help get the point across better than a warning or
restriction. congrats on making a site where good bottom warmings
aren't condemned. please e-mail me with any suggestions on how
to continue getting spanked rather than grounded. should i talk
to my parents or what?
thanks
|
![]()