Reader's feedback, Aug 2002


Here are some letters from readers of this website, the newest letters on top. All e-mail addresses and names have been anonymized to protect the sender's privacy. Brackets in red (...) indicate deleted portions.

Some people request non-anonymization to allow other readers to send them feedback. If you want to reply to these people, please send your reply to the email address in the header of their mail, not to spankwithlove@hotmail.com. Thanks!
 


 
From:    j...@msn.com
To:      spankwithlove@hotmail.com
Subject: Spanking teenagers
Date:    Wed, 28 Aug 2002

I just discovered your website and think it is great! I read the e-mail on March 24, 2002 from the father who felt he couldn't give his 15-year-old son a proper spanking because he was now wearing the tight boxer/brief trunks underwear and wanted to expose his bare bottom without embarrassing him. I would suggest having his son put on a pair of regular briefs prior to a spanking and then the father could push them into the crack to expose enough buttocks to spank him. Keeping around the extra pair of briefs might just be incentive for the son to not misbehave, knowing he will have to wear them to get a spanking.

I found the e-mails on teen spanking very interesting. I know I wish I had talked with my Dad when I was a teenager about giving me spankings instead of other forms of punishment. I would suggest to the teenagers writing in to talk with their dads about this and they may be surprised how receptive their dads are to the idea. I think there were a lot of times that I probably needed to have my pants pulled down for a good bare-bottom spanking. I liked the e-mail from Josh in Boston that his stepdad really helped him by giving him the spankings that he needed, especially when he was a teenager. I know that must have been embarrassing for his friend to know this, but the friend probably wished he could have had the same kind of punishment. I had friends as a teenager who would get these kind of spankings and I wished sometimes that my dad would have done that for me. Children want authority and discipline in their lives, and giving them a spanking when necessary is justified.
 


 
From:    devonnygurl@yahoo.com
To:      spankwithlove@hotmail.com
Subject: (none)
Date:    Sun, 25 Aug 2002

Note: this letter is not anonymized on special request.

Dear Sirs,

Hello! My name is Devonny, and I've heard about this wonderful website from my cousin and close friend Charlotte, who also emailed you, I believe. I am writing for advice on the same problem: I'm also a fifteen-year-old girl who wishes my parents spanked me. I have fallen into some bad habits- like lying- that I don't quite have the self-dicipline to kick, and I believe spankings would help. Like Charlotte, I think my governess would spank me if I asked her. Would this be a good idea? Also, Charlotte and I were talking about it, and we thought that maybe we could talk to our governessess about it together, since her governess and mine are close friends also. She and I spend lots of time at each others' houses, and as we often get in trouble together,I wouldn't mind being spanked by Charlotte's governess if mine is unavalible. Charlotte feels the same way. What do you think? I would love a reply. Please leave my name and email address up here, so others may contact me as well.

Thank you for your kind attention, sir, regarding this matter. It is much appreciated.

Yours respectfully, Devonny
 


 
From:    m...@aol.com
To:      spankwithlove@hotmail.com
Subject: spankingwithlove
Date:    Wed, 21 Aug 2002

hello i was spanked as a child usually is was bare bottom and over my mom's knee, my last spanking was at age 13, and it was a good one for talking back to my mom, im now 23 and still think sometimes i should be spanked' for anyone to say spanking a child is wrong is crazy, i turned out just fine......
 


 
From:    b...@aol.com
To:      spankwithlove@hotmail.com
Subject: spank with love
Date:    Sun, 18 Aug 2002

On your site you mention a methiod called the "buildup" methiod. how is this done? you may want to say how this is done as i must not be the only person who does not know.

now my mom used to put water on my bottom before a few of my spankings cause it would make it sting alot more without her having to spank harder. she used a wet wash rag and just sponged my bottom and would spank me with a light paint stick. the paint stick never did any damage to me besides turning my bottom red and it stinging alot, but she also used her hand. my mom after the spanking would then take some lotion and give my bottom a quick rub. then she hug and kiss me and that was that.

yu should say something about on your site.....

anyway just wanted to ask a question and tell you how i got spanked.

great site keep it up
 


 
From:    b...@aol.com
To:      spankwithlove@hotmail.com
Subject: a spanked teenager
Date:    Wed, 14 Aug 2002

When I was a teenager, I had a choice of being spanked or being grounded for the weekend, I almost always chose the spanking, as I did not want my friends to know I was being punished.

Right after taking a bath, I had to go into my parents room, and remove the towel, and bring them the belt, and lay across the bed, sometimes, I had to stand, and my father hels my hands above my head. I always wanted my father to use his hand, but, he chose the belt. Depending what I did, was the amount of hits I got, normally, 10. Being a teenager, this was most embarrasing, because, sometimes I had to stand in the corner, until, they said I could go back to my room. However, I am a better person for this today.
 


 
From:    coffeewriter@hotmail.com
To:      spankwithlove@hotmail.com
Subject: none
Date:    Wed, 14 Aug 2002

Note: this letter is not anonymized on special request.

Dear Everybody,

My name is Charlotte, and I am a fifteen-year-old girl who wishes my parents spanked me. There is no dicipline in my house. My parents are very wealthy and spend more time at yacht parties then they do with me. I get away with whatever I want, and I always feel very guilty. I wish I had the courage to ask my parents to spank me. I do have a very strict governess who believes in spanking, unlike my parents. I think she'd do it if I asked. Any suggestions?

Please leave my name and email address on here so I can hear from other teenagers with my problem. I commend you on your excellent website.

Yours sincerely,

Charlotte
 


 
From:    r...@ntlworld.com
To:      spankwithlove@hotmail.com
Subject: teenagers
Date:    Wed, 14 Aug 2002

I have always insisted my now teenaged daughter is spanked on her bare bottom, as I remember vividly as a child how emotionally that increased the effect of the punishment. As I explain to her, I want her to dislike spankings enough to want very much to avoid them! I also feel that it IS then an intensely personal and vulnerable experience, which has a big influence on a sophisticated adolescent. However sullen and angry her moods may be at times, after a spanking - and certainly not even a severe spanking- she wants to cuddle and talk, and I think she feels protected and close again which is difficult for a girl coming to terms with a lot of new independence. It is because of this vulnerability that I also believe very strongly that parents when they spank like this, have an equal duty to see it is a secure and loving interaction, if an unpleasant one, and that the punishment is given as a consequence rather than an act of anger, and the child is reassured and comforted afterwards. I can vividly remember the feelings of being cast out, rejected and with a crime to my name that I would never feel forgiven for after a scolding or a smack from my own parents, although very loving and conscientious people, and we agreed very early on this would never be my daughter's experience of parental discipline.

Since she became old enough for her dignity to be important, I simply began to wait until she is over my lap before taking her pants down, and we pull them up before she gets up: I suspect she would find palaver about shorts- particularly wet shorts- a good deal more humiliating than being bare! The debate I read about teenagers however does remind me of reading of a teenaged girl who was severely disabled and dependent on her parents for full physical care, being asked by a journalist didn't she find it humiliating being bathed by man? The daughter simply looked at the journalist in total confusion and said "No- he's my Dad!" I think this illustrates very strongly, it's the relationship between parent and child and the attitude the parent brings that makes the difference between spanking being an undamaging, positive method of discipline, and between being abusive. I think most parents who responsibly use spanking- real spanking- would cringe for and pity the children commonly quoted as the case for not spanking, who are frequently slapped on face or body in supermarkets by angry, frustrated parents who do not understand what discipline means and use physical punishment as a means of anger management.

I notice on your site a suggestion for discouraging a child from kicking during a spanking. I have always been understanding of the fact that being spanked hurts. It's not something I would expect any child to accept with full composure throughout, and I'd be doubtful of the efficiency of the spanking if they did! However there have been occasions where my daughter has, when the spanking begins to get genuinely painful, half got up or pushed herself up and turned around to protect her bottom, and I have admittedly, hurriedly finished the spanking which was much shorter and lighter than it should have been, in doubt that she would remain in position much longer. If you have any suggestions regarding this, I would be interested to read them.

Yours sincerely
 


 
From:    p...@hotmail.com
To:      spankwithlove@hotmail.com
Subject: where is your web site located?
Date:    Mon, 12 Aug 2002

Hello,

I have read your website and I think it is great. It gives good concise instruction in how to use spanking in a positive, loving, non abusive way. From time to time I counsel parents who have tried all the non spanking tactics and still have the same problems. I like to refer these people to part or all of your site as a means to show them how to incorperate spanking the proper way. I agree with spanking as a last resort, but I also think that it needs to be done as an act of love, and done for the child and not to the child. However I cannot find it now. Please let me know where it is so that I may find it again.

Thank You

Pastor (...)
 


 
From:    b...@aol.com
To:      spankwithlove@hotmail.com
Subject: your website
Date:    Wed, 7 Aug 2002

Hi. I'm 13, and I haven't been spanked since I was 6. I'm sometimes rude to my father, who will threaten to spank me, but is always half joking. I wish I could tell my parents to spank me, but it would be too embarrassing. What I think this website doesn't understand is that most teenagers are way too embarrassed to just confront their parents like that, and just out of nowhere ask them if they could start spanking them.

The last time I was spanked was when I was 6, and it was about 2 swats to my jeans. That's how it always was, and I wouldn't even feel it (literally).

Well, that's all. Peace Out!
 


 
From:    b...@cyber-club.net
To:      spankwithlove@hotmail.com
Subject: A teen that needed a jolly good spanking
Date:    Wed, 7 Aug 2002

Hello

My name is B(...), and first of all I can't believe that I am e mailing you. I am thirteen years old and I live with my Mum and Step-Father here in England.

A few months ago my behaviour was becoming increasingly worse, something that admittedly I was getting away with, I came home from School whenever I wanted, I started mixing with the wrong crowd, and yes was getting into all sorts of mischief, It worried my Mum, didn't bother my natural Father whom she divorced, but became of concern to my Step-Dad.

Then one day, enough was enough, and I got the hiding of my life, my Step-Dad literally picked me up and dragged me off to my bedroom, Sure I swore at him, and tried to get away from him, but his vice like grip got the better of me, NO messing about, it was trousers pulled down and my underpants ripped off me and several minutes spent across his knee, by the time he had finished with me my bottom was red raw, he kept telling me that this should have happened a long time ago. Now I see things in a very different light, best thing that ever happened to me was that spanking, my school work has improved, and to be honest its much easier to behave properly, I would much prefer to prove to both Mum and Dad that I can behave, than to prove to those who mean nothing to me that I can't.

Cheers for reading
 


 
From:    jae12@lineone.net
To:      spankwithlove@hotmail.com
Subject: Spanking
Date:    Mon, 5 Aug 2002

Note: this letter is not anonymized on special request.

Dear Sir,

I am writing to commend you on your excellent site.

I wish to offer my services of advice to those who feel they need punishing, but are unable to find or pursuade others to do it, especially teenagers.

I am from England and a retired teacher and parent with much experience.

If anyone would like to contact me on jae12@lineone.net I would be most happy to discuss their problem.

Your site is excellent and I cannot praise it highly enough.

I was caned both at home and school and have administered the same during my career.

At no time did I find it anything but effective and positive.

Please contact me, I am only happy to help.

Yours sincerely

James Evans

(in a second mail)

Dear Sir,

Thank you most kindly for your reply.

I am most gratified to hear that you will publish my letter.

I am only too happy to help anyone who needs advice in this way, and to help in other ways.

I am only too aware what it is like to be a teenager with a conscience, I tutor privately and have several teenage pupils who are desperate for their parents to cane them for their bad behaviour.

I do have their parent's permission and instruction to do it on their behalf, but this is not the same as a loving parent bonding with their offspring by having the courage to punish them with all the love that entails.

Done properly, however painful, can be one of the strongest bonding rituals the human species has.

I was always caned at home and school, but my father, however much I respected him, never seemed close until one day when I was twelve years old and had just received a particularly painful caning, gave me the biggest hug of my life and we talked for what seemed an age about anything and everything.

From then on our relationship was totally different.

We were close and could talk about anything.

Of course he punished me when necessary, but now it was a mutual arrangement to which I fully agreed and took with a will, however painful.

I hope you are well and look forward seing more of your excellent site.

Yours sincerely

James Evans
 


 



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Last update: Sep-10-2002