Chapter 396: Danny XL—In an Instant

God how did she always smell so good, like baking cookies and warm spices and fragrant flowers, and underneath that, he could tell, a deep, low odor, her skin, her warmth Perhaps it was the first thing he’d noticed about her, that scent that made his mouth water and his stomach growl. In kissing her, feeling her soft, cool palms on his cheeks, then they slid delicately, shyly perhaps to his shoulders and he could feel them tremble. Oh God the scent was overpowering, and her mouth so warm and wet, a tickle of her tongue, slipping briefly over his own. It brought a film of sweat over his thighs and his neck and under his arms on his palms and he felt briefly panicked that she’d be disgusted by it.

Their lips parted and he couldn’t tell if he’d broke it off or if she had, and he half expected her to slap him again, and his cheek tingled in anticipation. What could he say to her now, her eyes so moist and deep blue in color, asking him to lead her to the door to her freedom or somewhere else, possibly to both of their destruction. It was up to him now, he had to do the right thing, but for some reason, he couldn’t remember exactly why he should.

He had to tell her to leave. That was the right thing, for both of their sakes, he had to ignore the heat in his groin and the desire in his heart. “Michele…” he began but her little hand flicked out, her thumb pressed lightly against his lips, she wanted him quiet and he swallowed and nodded and what he wanted to do was take her thumb into his and he knew he shouldn’t want to do that but again, he couldn’t remember why… a name, a reason, a why, just wouldn’t come to him.

She stepped away from him and he didn’t say anything, he watched her as she unfastened her knee length, fitted black jacket, something fashionable and bulky over her delicate frame and it slid off her shoulders and dropped onto the floor. He opened his mouth to say something but a quick glance from her eyes, and she walked away from him and he watched her as she went down the hallway and to his bedroom, the door of which was wide open. Message clear and Dan felt his heart beating so hard now that his ears felt swollen and his throat felt swollen and even his thighs trembled at intervals and through it all he felt an odd sense of sleepiness and cold as if he could blink and find himself somewhere else.

No spit remained in his mouth and he walked slowly down the hall, the sound of his own footsteps scaring the hell out of him, and he wondered if he should have locked his front door. Feeling shy and frightened Dan peeked into his bedroom and he saw her sitting at the foot of his bed leaning over, her profile almost hidden underneath loose tendrils of honey blond hair, one of her shining black boot-like shoes sitting on its side on the floor and she unlaced the other one. On the comforter, next to her, lay a small, square, blue package, he knew what that was, she must have brought it in her purse or pocket.

In that instant Dan Hinote realized what was going to happen, the complete inescapable fact and the thought frightened and excited him so much he couldn’t even remember who she was and what she was doing here. He licked his lips. “You don’t have to do this.”

Michele looked at him after she slipped off her shoe and she held out her hand to him, her face pink cheeked, so clean and loving, angelic, soft, and he even thought of a pure animal like a dove or a butterfly. She couldn’t hurt him, ever, she never dreamed of leading him by the nose, or making him suffer or mentally wearing him down. All she did for him was love and care. All she did for anyone was provide and shower with emotional generosity.

He felt dirty and cumbersome, an oaf in sweat pants and a bad flannel shirt as he went to her, and her face didn’t even betray any sort of annoyance at his sweaty palm when she took it in her own. Nervousness sent his thighs trembling again, and more sweat and she smiled and kissed the inside of his wrist, and the light pressure of his lips swelled in his belly and fired him to an erection that filled him with as much shame as ever before, and he wanted to turn away from her and hide it.

“You’re nervous, sweating?” she whispered, her voice like silk.

He closed his eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“I like it,” she replied and Dan’s mouth fell open and he held his breath when her fingers unbuttoned his shirt and almost instantly, her lips pressed against the sensitive skin of his belly, a slip of damp and a flick of warm tongue. Light kiss, light kiss, light kiss up his belly to the bottom of his chest and her hands stroked the small of his back underneath his shirt and the mere pleasure of it made him groan and he let his unbuttoned shirt fall off, the cold air hitting his sweaty flesh but providing him with no relief from the heated pressure under his flesh.

“Mimi I…” he began but he didn’t know what he was going to say, and anyway, it was erased when her hands slid down the back of his pants and she squeezed just slightly his ass and he groaned and almost fell forward on top of her. Just barely he kept his balance and she proceeded to push his pants down to his ankles, exposing him completely, beyond recall or repair. Now the complete panic shook his heart, what did she think of him now? Being a woman of some experience, did she want to laugh now, did she want to leave him behind and go back to her husband?

“Calm down,” she whispered softly and he closed his eyes again, flesh twitching and listening to her rip open the condom package and feeling exposed and ridiculous, standing naked with his pants around his ankles, waiting for her. He half expected someone to come up from behind and smack him bare handed on the ass laughing at him and telling him that he was stupid shit for thinking the goalie’s wife would actually be interested in him. “Sit down next to me.”

He opened his eyes and he couldn’t look her in the face, he even felt grateful to be able to sit on his bed, stepping out of his pants to do so and he held his hands together, not looking at his lap, afraid of his aroused genitals and what she thought of them.

Her cold fingers jolted his warm wrist as she took it gently in her hand and put the condom in his palm. “Pinch the top and roll it on, leave a little space at the tip.” She said softly and he wondered if she spoke so quietly because she was shy or if she were afraid of scaring him. Either way, Dan didn’t want to disobey her and he waited a moment to calm his trembling fingers, forcing himself to look down and he fumbled at first with the condom but didn’t find it that hard at all to slide it on and roll it, remembering vaguely the sex ed classes in high school and the fruit he and his classmates practiced on, laughing and blushing. It felt kind of weird too, almost like he’d put on a hospital glove or body suit, and the heat almost felt unbearable and stifling.

Still, when he had it on he felt elated and looked at Michele with a smile, wanting praise and getting it with a sparkling smile from her. He reached over and grabbed her in his arms, warm flesh, soft sweater, and he kissed her. She squeaked and laughed, giggling, her lips pulling away from him her fingers going through his hair and she ran a fingertip down the side of his cheek, touching his chin lightly. “I’ll do anything you want, Daniel, and don’t be afraid to ask.”

He touched her hands and she held onto them and guided them down to the bottom of her soft sweater, cashmere or some other airy material and she lifted it only slightly and his fingers met the warm skin of her tummy and in that moment he felt overwhelmed and impatient. Wanting to see all of her he grabbed onto the sweater and pulled it up, she laughed again, gleefully, in such a carefree way that he’d never heard from her before. The sweater peeled off easily, and even crackled with a little static electricity that floated a few errant strands of her hair.

Rather than look at her body he kissed her again, loving her strong lips and agile tongue and this time her teeth caught his bottom lip, letting it go and surprising him. His eyes opened and he realized hers were open too and that also shocked him, he didn’t figure her as one who kissed with her eyes open. With the blood threatening to burst his brain, he watched her smile remove the clip from her hair, letting it fall around her neck and face and shoulders. Then she reached behind her back. He looked at the sharp outline of her collarbones, the hollow at the base of her throat, her smooth skin, the dark red flowers embroidered on the white of her bra, the round pale, peach of her small breasts, peeking.

He couldn’t look when she took it off and he felt his eyes fill with tears. “I don’t know if I can,” he whispered.

“You’ve come too far, Daniel,” she said taking his cheeks in her hands and kissing him once on the tip of his nose. “You know you have.”

And Danny wondered why she didn’t say “we”, hadn’t she come just as far as he had, with even more to lose?

But he didn’t ask her about a simple word, because she said something slowly in French and he watched the pucker of her lips as she spoke and he let the words caress his ears. Her cheeks reddened and her eyes half closed, she slowly laid down on the bed, and Dan felt calm now and he turned to her, wrapped his fingers with hers and he looked at her as she lay, frail, almost painfully thin with her rib cage prominent but his eyes were captivated by her pink tipped breasts, and her petite frame reminded him of something innocent and weak, something meant for him to touch and take, and claim, something that could be entirely his in a way maybe nothing had ever been before.