| MEANWHILE… [Quatre is kneeling on the ground by a mini-mansion he and Duo had built out of the sticks. He is still holding the stuffed Gundam, his eyes sparkling happily. Duo stands up and looks around. Silence. Quatre begins to look out of sorts. More silence. Duo puts his hands on his hips and taps his foot impatiently. The silence persists. Suddenly, a cricket can be heard.] Cricket- Cricket! Cricket, cricket! Cricket, cricket! (6) Quatre- [He becomes frantic and begins yelling rather like a girl.] Aaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Where is it? Kill it! Kill it! [Thirty Random Minions run out of the jet. Ten of them pick Quatre up and deliver him to safety, while the other twenty find to evil bug and start stepping on it.] WE SHOULDN’T BE FIGHTING AT ALL! [Random Minions leave and the silence resumes.] Duo- [blinks] Boink, boink! [Quatre finally breaks the silence.] Quatre- [whispering] Why are we being quiet? Isn’t your line next? Duo- [annoyed] Yeah, but Voice From the Sky didn’t do the stupid introduction to the scene. Voice From the Sky- Sorry. Here we find our two heroes building a- O_o What’s that? [Duo looks down at the stick house that stands about as high as his knees.] Duo- My house? Voice From the Sky- [yelling] Oi! Okay, okay! We can work with this! [She returns to a strained narrator tone.] Little do they know, Treize is coming down the road. Duo- Yeah we do. You just told us. Quatre- Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Ttttttrrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiiiiizzzzzzzzzzzzzzeeeee! Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo… [Duo could only take so many O’s. He takes the stuffed Sandrock and whacks the screaming boy up side the head with it. Quatre stops screaming.] Sorry. Duo- [shrugs] S’okay. [gives him back the Sandrock.] Voice From the Sky? Voice From the Sky- When Treize appears on the horizon Quatre and Duo run aboard the Winner family’s private jet and fly away. [They do so. Treize doesn’t really notice as the jet takes off because he’s stupid. He just keeps walking along. When he gets to the house he drops to his knees and peers into one of the windows.] Treize - Hello? Is there anyone in there who wants to be my friend? [No One answers.] No One- NO! [Treize begins to pout.] Treize - Fine! [He stands up and trips over the house, knocking it down. He falls and lands on the glue-covered sticks Duo had left in a pile earlier. He stands back up looking very uncute covered in sticks and globs of glue.] Whaaaaaaaaaaa! Note- (6) Inside joke I added just for my very best friend’s- and my own- amusement! MEANWHILE… Voice From the Sky- On the Winner family’s private jet… Duo- Where are we going? [He is playing with the buttons on the phone that is attached to the armrest of his seat.] Quatre- Wufei’s. [He takes the phone away and puts it back on the receiver. Duo jumps out of his seat and makes a disgusted face.] Duo- EEEEWWWWWWWW!!!!! Why do we have to go to his house? Why can’t we go some where like Vegas or Atlantis City? I don’t want to go to Wufei’s house! [crosses his arms over his chest] Voice From the Sky- Duo shut up. [pause] Don’t you mean Atlantic City? Quatre- Yeah. I think. [looks cute and confused] Why would you want to go there? Duo- [ginning] Girls and money! Quatre- [looking even more confused] Then why not just go to my house? I bet it’s closer than either of those places. Duo- O_o [blink] Boink, boink! [slowly] Um… no, Quatre. No. [Quatre continues to look confused while Duo sits back down, terrible thoughts of twenty-nine female Quatres running through his head. When he can no longer stand being still, he jumps back up and walks over to where his friend is sitting.] Are we there yet? Quatre- No. Duo- [grins] Are we there yet? Quatre- No. Duo- Are we there yet? Quatre- No. Duo- Are we there yet? Quatre- [annoyed] No. Duo- Are we there yet? Quatre- [louder] No. Duo- Are we there yet? Quatre- [louder] No. Duo- Are we there yet? Quatre- [yells] No! Duo- Are we there yet? Quatre- [screams] NO! [Duo is set flying backward up the aisle. He stops when he is slammed into the cockpit door. Duo shakes his head a little and stands up.] Duo- I only asked a question. [He looks at the door and curiously mutters] I wonder… [He pushes the door open and walks in. There is one Random Minion flying the jet. Duo walks up behind him and yells.] Hi! [Random Minion #34 jumps.] Random Minion #34- What are you doing in here? Duo- I was just looking for the bathroom. Random Minion #34- It’s at the other end of the plane. Duo- [pause] Oh. [He stands there silently for a few seconds, not moving. Then, pointing at a flashing red button, says] What’s that? Random Minion #34- Don’t touch it. Duo- Why? Random Minion #34- Because it’s the Don’t Touch Me Button ©. Duo- What happens if I touch it? Random Minion #34- [annoyed] Don’t. [Duo reaches out and is just about to touch it when Random Minion #34 slaps his hand away.] Don’t! Go back and sit with Master Quatre! Duo- [pouts] But I want to sit with you. [He looks up at Random Minion #34 with Big Sad Eyes ©.] Random Minion #34- No. Duo- [whimpers pathetically] Puh-lease? I’ll be good. Honest. Random Minion #34- [thinks for a second] No. [Duo stomps his foot.] Duo- Fine! I don’t like you any ways! [He pushes the Don’t Touch Me Button © and runs out of the cockpit.] Quatre! Your minion was being mean to me! [Quatre looks up as Duo runs towards him, followed closely by a red-faced Random Minion #34.] Quatre- [yells disapprovingly] Random Minion #34! Being mean isn’t… [pause. He finishes lamely] nice. Stop it. Random Minion #34 – But he pushed the Don’t Touch Me Button ©! Quatre- [thinking] Well, if it’s a Don’t Touch Me Button © and Duo pushed it, I don’t think he did anything wrong, now did he? Duo and Random Minion- [blink] Boink, boink! [They both stare at Quatre- Random Minion #34 in confused admiration for his young master’s perception and intelligence, and Duo because of how easily he had reasoned that out.] Duo- Yeah! Now leave me alone! [Random Minion #34 looks embarrassed and walks back to the cockpit.] You sure told him! Wow! I wish I had a minion to push around! [glomps Quatre] Can I have a minion? I’ll be nice to you from now on, I promise! And I’ll never, like, be mean to Trowa either. Please? [Big Sad Eyes ©] And I’ll feed it and give it baths and take it for walks! Puh-lease? Quatre- I, um… guess. [Duo starts jumping up and down, clapping his hands in cute, little, chibi joy.] Duo- Cool! Which one do I get? Do you have a catalog? Can I have Random Minion #666? I want a smart one, not a stupid one like Random Minion #34! [Quatre pushes Duo off him.] Quatre- I don’t have six-hundred-and-sixty-six minions! I only have 488! [softly] I think. Dou- Then can I rename my minion? Quatre- [He crosses his arms over his chest firmly and shakes his head.] No. [Duo pouts, but does not dispute the response.] Duo- Fine. Then can I have Random Minion #1? Quatre- That’s Abdaul. You see, Random Minion #1, 2 and 3 are my personal servants. They were all given names. But you can have Random Minion #4. Duo- Naw! I want Random Minion #47. No. #403. No, wait. Random Minion #181… [He continues this as Quatre waits patiently for him to make up his mind.] I know! I want Random Minion #34! Quatre- [Who had been stacking crystal glasses and silverware looked up, his eyes heavy with boredom.] You can’t. [dully] He’s flying the plane. Duo- Fine! Then I want Random Minion #4! [Quatre sighed in exasperation.] MEANWHILE… [The setting is a nice, little… ?O_o? [sigh] Never mind.] Voice From the Sky- O_O [Voice From the Sky stares at the huge fortress which had billions of laser cannons sticking out of every wall. There is a huge tower at one end of the structure with a blinking light on top of it. There is only one window at the back of the building. Wufei can be seen looking out.] Um… As we enter the humble home of our third little Gundam pilot, we join cute, little, PEACE-LOVING Wufei. [Wufei looks up as his name is said. Voice From the Sky slowly continues, glancing around the room.] And Heero is no where to be seen. [sigh of relief] There is suddenly a knock at the door… Wufei- Come in. [The door opens and a servant walks in followed by a whimpering Quatre and a Duo, who has the plush Sandrock stuffed in his mouth to keep him quiet, both with their arms tied behind them. Following the two is Heero with his gun drawn and pointed at the poor boys.] Heero- They claim to know you. Wufei- Heero, let them go! [Heero grudgingly pulls out a knife and cuts the ropes.] Sorry guys. Duo- [He rips Sandrock out of his mouth and throws it on the ground, yelling.] You should be! I was just about to get my minion! I’ll have you know- [He stops, spotting the large computer/satellite set up. He runs over and plops down in the chair.] Cool! What kinda games ya got? Wufei- None. It’s a Treize Tracking Device ©. Heero put it in for me. [Quatre picks up his stuffed Gundam and hugs it protectively.] Duo- [yelling in disgust] Why do you want to track Treize? That’s gross! Wufei- [rolls eyes] I don’t want to track him down! I want to be able to tell if he’s coming near the house! Duo- Oh. Well, I’m not Treize. Leave me alone. [He starts spinning in circles in the office chair. Quatre looks out the window at the setting sun.] Quatre- Boy, this sure has been a long day. I hope Treize doesn’t try to break in while we’re sleeping. [Heero pulls his gun out from its Secret Spot ©.] Heero- If he does, I will kill him. Quatre- We shouldn’t be fighting at all! Heero- o_O Sure. [Duo is still spinning when the computer starts beeping madly. He jumps out of the chair.] Duo- [yells] I didn’t do it! It was Heero! Wufei- Treize is coming! Quatre- Aaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Ttttttrrrrrrrrrrrrreeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeiiiiiiiiiiiiiizzzzzzzzzzzzzzeeeee! Nooooooooooooooooooo… [Heero points the gun at him and he stops abruptly.] Sorry. Heero-… [puts gun away slowly] Wufei, you go up to the tower and let me know when you see him. Duo, go down to the artillery storage room and get a gun. Duo- Yay! [runs out of the room] Heero- I’ll take care of the manual controls up here. [Wufei nods and leaves the room while Heero sits in the chair and begins typing.] Quatre- [excited] What do I get to do, Heero? Heero- Stay out of my way. [Quatre pouts and runs out of the room. Heero pays no attention to him as he continues typing. Suddenly, Wufei’s voice can be heard on the walkie-talkie.] Wufei- [from walkie-talkie] I spotted him Heero. He’s coming up on the west side of the fortress. Heero- Mission accepted. [He turns the walkie-talkie off and brings up a surveillance screen on the computer. It shows Treize skipping happily down the road, a few sticks still stuck in his hair. Heero then pushes a few buttons and his exact location showed up. He typed a little more, aiming all the missiles he had at Treize. He begins his maniacal laughter as he pushes the button to launch them.] HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MEANWHILE… [Treize is skipping down the road, trying to look at the bright side to the day, just like Barney told Tommy to do in episode 36 of Barney and Friends. (7)] Voice From the Sky- Treize walked along until he saw the big, really mean-looking house with all the guns pointed at him as he moved down the road. Treize - I wonder if there’s anyone there who would like to be my friend. [Just as Treize is about to walk up and knock on the door (that sounds funny) a bazillion missiles flew at him from out of no where. He just stood there because he’s Treize and he’s stupid and uncute. The missiles explode, but he does not die. His ghetto 80’s Ken Doll © hair deflected all the damage.] Note- (7) I honestly don’t know what Barney said to Tommy in episode 36. And I really don’t care. However, if you do, shoot yourself. Now. For the good of humanity. MEANWHILE… [Heero stares at the monitor in horror.] Heero- What the hell?! [He runs to the window, pulling out his gun. He begins to shoot Treize, screaming] Die, demon from hell! [Treize giggles girlishly.] Treize - Stop it! [giggle] That [giggle] tickles! [Wufei and Duo return, both of them empty handed because Wufei thought Treize would be dead and Duo had stopped to throw rocks at the servant who had tied him up earlier, forgetting to get any more guns.] Wufei- What? He’s still alive?! Duo- O_O Wow. Quatre- We can escape in my Winner family’s private jet! Come on! [They all follow Quatre to the Winner family’s private jet and get in it. They fly away and leave Treize standing there stupidly, still giggling. Suddenly, the little birdie flies up and lands on Treize’s shoulder.] Treize - Oh! Little birdie! Did you change your mind? Do you want to be my friend now? [The little birdie starts peeking his head.] OUCH! STOP IT, LITTLE BIRDIE! THAT HURTS! SSSSSSSSSTTTTTTTOOOOOOPPPPPPPP!!!!!!!! [runs down the road] Voice From the Sky- [speaking loudly over the screams] Well, that’s all we have for now. Thank you for coming and don’t forget to tip your waitress on the way out! [Muse giggles, poking Treize in the back as he runs down the road, the little birdie still clinging to his shoulder, pecking his head.] ~ The End ~ |