A Thunder With No Rain By: Duet Quatre paced along the length of the room.  It had been over an hour since the storm had begun and no one had seen Duo since it started.  Where could he be?  Why had he run? Quatre tried desperately to get at least one of the other guys to help him look for the missing pilot, but it was useless.  Heero simply told Quatre not to worry, Duo'd be back soon enough.  Trowa sat in his chair reading a book.  And Wufei felt that Duo probably decided to take a run in the storm, it seemed like something that boy would do.  Quatre didn't buy any of it.  Something didn't feel right and he had to find the American pilot. Quatre began his search in the hanger-bay.  Just about every time Duo couldn't be found all you had to do was look in Deathscythe's cockpit and there he'd be either fixing some little thing or curled up in the seat napping.  Quatre opened the door to the bay and looked around.  It didn't seem like anyone was there.  He walked up to the cockpit door of Deathscythe and stopped. "Duo, are you there?"  Quatre asked. No answer. Quickly he overrode the security locks for the hatch and peered inside.  What he found was and immaculate cockpit with only one item that seemed out of place.  It was a snapshot of the whole group together.  Everyone seemed happy. One of the few times that happened.  The condition of the cockpit was quite a shock, especially knowing the owner.  But there was no Duo. Quatre closed the hatch and left the hanger.  His uneasy feeling became even worse after finding the empty Gundam.  What could be so bad that Duo wouldn't even find comfort in his favorite place? He made a through search of the house starting with the basement.  Then he checked the living room, kitchen, den, and even the closets on the first floor.  Still no Duo.  Determined to find his friend, Quatre made his way to the second floor to continue the search. A bright flash of lightning lit up the house followed by the rumble of thunder.  The deep vibrations from the thunder tickled Quatre's chest.   As he enjoyed the sensation, the young pilot heard a strained noise come from the bathroom. Cautiously Quatre opened the bathroom door.  Again nothing seemed unusual or out of place.  Quatre pulled back the shower curtain to check behind only to be greeted a strange sight.  There in the furthest corner of the bathtub was Duo sitting with his knees drawn up to his chest and tears streaked down his cheeks. "Duo, what are you doing in the bathtub?"  Quatre asked relieved to find Duo but very confused as to where he found him. Duo didn't answer.  He just buried his face in his arms. The whole scene started to worry Quatre.  This was in direct contrast with the happy-go-lucky Gundam pilot he knew.  What had Duo so upset that he'd sit in a bathtub crying? "Please, Duo.  Tell me what's wrong.  Why are you so upset?" "Go, please."  The request was barely audible. "Duo-" "Just go!  I don't need anyone's pity or comfort.  I just need to be alone.  So just leave, please." Quatre heard Duo's words, and they stung.  But he also heard the underlying tone of those same words.  He was asking for help the only way he could let himself.  He had to let himself feel like he was capable and not in need of help. Another rumble of thunder shook the house.  This one was further away than the last one.  Quatre glanced over at Duo and saw a shiver pass through the other boy. It's the storm, Quatre realized.  No, it's not the storm, but something deeper.  Something the storm represents or reminds him of.  But what? Determined to help his friend, Quatre doubled his efforts.  He sat on the edge of the tub and placed a comforting hand on the quivering boy's shoulder.   "Duo, I'm not going.  Please, open up to me.  Trust me.  I'm worried about you and just want to help." Duo lifted his head from his arms to look at Quatre.  He searched the other boy's eyes to find the truth in his words.  Deep blue met violet, and in those eyes was a sincerity rarely found in men.  He truly wanted to help and know the truth.  But- "Quatre…I don't think I…" "You don't have to tell me everything right away," Quatre reassured, trying to lighten the mood.  "We can start small.  Like, why of all places you'd hide in the bathroom.  Not just the bathroom, the bathtub." "Because it's the safest place in the house." Quatre stared at Duo.  Of all the answers he could've expected to hear that was not one he was ready for.  With his curiosity piqued and the need to keep Duo talking, he smiled and nodded at him to continue. Wiping drying tears from his eyes, Duo continued. "It's really obvious if you think about it.  Since there's no carpeting in a bathroom to absorb the sound, on one can sneak up on you.  And if you're in the tub, you can close the curtain to hide yourself while and find a corner where you can see the whole room either looking directly at the spots or seeing the ones you can't in the mirror.  No matter where you are in there, you have the upper hand."  Duo let a faint shadow of his usual grin grace his face.  "Guess it's just one of those things I picked up living on the streets.  Gotta know the best hiding places when the cops are after ya." Quatre began to smile too.  The smile that crossed his face was not the same as Duo's brought on by a passing happy thought, but the smile of someone who came to an unprepared understanding.  Duo had been a street urchin with no family.  This was quite a revelation since none of the boys knew much about each other's backgrounds.  The powers that be felt it was better that way. "Well, I'm here with you now, and nothing can sneak up on you while I'm here."  Quatre said trying to make the most of Duo's slight mood change.  "Listen, why don't we go someplace else.  Someplace a little less… awkward.  I promise I won't leave you alone if you come with me." Again, Duo searched Quatre's face.  The blonde simply smiled at the boy and extended his hand.  Hesitantly, Duo took that hand and let himself be helped out of the tub. "Where are we going to go to now?"  Duo asked reminding Quatre even more of a lost little child. Quatre pondered this question for a moment.  Where could he take Duo that would make him feel more comfortable and less frightened?  The living room was out, with all the others there he'd never get Duo in.  The kitchen was just as awkward as the bathroom.  His room was out, it would make his friend feel more vulnerable there than not.  Maybe Duo's own room would work.  Being around familiar objects and setting should help settle him a bit. "C'mon.  Just follow me."  Quatre put his arm around Duo's shoulders and led him down the hall. Duo's door sighed as the boys entered the room.  The sound seemed to mirror what Quatre felt.  He'd never had to do this before so it wasn't easy, but he did have all the times his sisters took care of him when was feeling like this.  He'd just try to remember those times and try to copy them as much as he could for Duo.  Silently he prayed it would be enough. Quatre led the frightened boy to the bed and let him sit.  He searched the room for a place to sit himself and found none.  The only chair in the room was piled so high with folded clothes to be put away and comic books he was afraid that if he tried to touch it it would all fall to the ground.  It looked like the bed was the only choice for him too. Quatre settled on the bed and wondered what to do next.  Duo looked so vulnerable and completely helpless anyone would have questioned the fact that he was a Gundam pilot.  His big violet eyes, which normally were so cheerful, were now tear-filled as he looked down at his hands which he wrung nervously in his lap.  Even his hair seemed to be different.  What hair left out of his braid seemed to be limp and weighed down as if by the rainstorm outside.  This was a side of himself Quatre knew most never saw.   Feeling he had to do something, Quatre took one of Duo's hands into his.  Duo jumped a bit and looked questioningly at Quatre. "Tell me what's wrong," Quatre offered.  "If you tell me I guarantee you'll feel a lot better.  No matter what it is, believe me, I'll never think less of you for it." Quatre saw the conflicting emotions in the other boy again.  This must have been harder on Duo than he thought.  He had to get Duo to talk.  He had to get this out of him, not just because of the danger a state of mind like this posed to himself and the rest of the pilots if it ever reoccurred during a mission, but because he hated to see his friend suffer like he was. "It's a long story," Duo said. "We have as much time as you need.  Neither of us are going anywhere," Quatre said brushing some stray hairs out of the other boy's face.   "Have you ever been alone?"  Duo asked. Quatre was taken aback by the question.  He looked back on his life and realized that he never had.  Since he was little there were always family members around him.  When he first came to earth the Maganacs took him in and finally he was now with his fellow pilots.  He quietly shook his head. "Well I have," Duo seemed to spit the words out rather than say them.  "Since I was very little I was alone.  My earliest memories are of running.  Running as fast as my legs could carry me." Quatre watched his face closely as Duo talked.  Looking at his eyes it seemed that he wasn't truly there anymore, but in that place in his past reliving the terrifying moments of a small, scared boy. "I never knew what I was running from or where I was running to.  I remember a young man, a father, or brother possibly, leading me along nearly dragging me.  There were noises all around me.  Some I knew were gunshots even at that young age.  Others I had never heard before.  They sounded like thunder, but there was no rain.  Loud, roaring thunder that got louder as the time went on."       It sounded like thunder, but there was no rain.  Quatre chastised himself for not seeing it earlier.  Of course there were only a few things that it could have ever been.  He quietly sat next to Duo and continued to listen.  Although he knew where the story was going and was painful, he still had to let Duo say what he had to to help him move on. "I don't know what happened exactly.  All I know is that I had these memories of thunder and running with someone and the next thing I can remember is standing in the middle of an unfamiliar town all alone.  It was the first time I was alone.  For those first few years I put my loneliness and the thunder together as a cause and effect.       "During those times I found others alone just like me.  I found out where I was and how to survive day in and day out in my situation.  Every so often there would be storms on the colony.  Not often, but enough where I had many sleepless nights crying over a half remembered past." Duo reached over into a drawer in his nightstand and pulled out a simple rosary.  He held it very carefully as if it were a piece of fine crystal that could break if the slightest wrong move was made. "When I was about eight, I think, a priest took me into his church and off the streets."  Duo let a small hint of his smile come across, "I'll admit I wasn't the easiest kid to take care of when I first got there, but I've always been thankful that they tried.  It was a simple, small place.  Only about a dozen or so kids, the father, and a sister helping out.  It seemed more like a family to me than anything else ever had. "It was the only time I wasn't afraid of the storms.  During one storm early on, Sister Helen promised me that they'd never harm me and that she'd be there for me." Quatre saw the smile fade and the tears start to well up again.  This time they were tears of loss not fear.  Again a debate waged in Quatre's head.  Should he stop Duo?  Should he let him tell it all?  He was so confused.  For the first time that night he truly was at a loss about what to do.         Duo made the choice for him.       "I lost them just as suddenly as I lost my first family."  Duo held the rosary tighter and brought it up to his face, "I wasn't there when it happened, but when I got there I knew."  The tears started to fall and there was nothing to do to stop them. "There was so much rubble to search through.  I had only found one person alive, but she died right in front of me.  All I have left of any of them is her rosary.  The thunder took them away from me too." Quatre began to cry along with Duo.  How someone so young suffer through so much loss?  It wasn't fair.  He pulled the boy closer to him as they wept together. "I haven't had anyone since then, until you guys came along.  You guys are like my family now.   The thunder's taken everyone away from me.  I don't want them to take you too.  I don't. I…" Duo sobbed as he fell into Quatre's arms. Quatre held him tight and tried to be strong.  He wasn't going to let Duo down.  If he only did one thing right his whole life it would be this.  He lifted Duo's face so they could look into each other's eyes. "We're not going to leave you, Duo.  I'm not going to leave you.  I promise.  No matter what happens, I'll always be here and you won't have to be alone anymore." Duo looked up at Quatre and the tears stopped. "Promise?" Quatre smiled down at the braided boy.  He pushed another strand out of his face and places a chaste kiss on his forehead. "I promise.  Forever.  You'll never be alone." Duo rested his head against Quatre's chest.  He knew the other boy was sincere.  He may not be able to keep that promise knowing fate and Duo, but he could still believe in it.  The strong will of the other pilot could hold the storm away for a little while longer.   Quatre laid Duo down on the bed and covered him up.  Duo looked up at him with a hint of fear back in his eyes.  Quatre just pressed the back of his hand against Duo's cheek and smiled. "I'm not going anywhere, remember?  I promised." Quatre carefully moved the items on the chair and pulled it next to the bed. "Go to sleep.  I'll stay right here.  No one and no thing will come here to harm you."       Quatre pulled the covers to Duo's chin and dimmed the light.  The young boy looked just like an angel as he slept.  So peaceful and beautiful.  Why did God seem to have to punish his earthly angels the most?  Why couldn't they be as happy as they make the rest of the world?       The rain stopped midway through the night, but Quatre never left.  He kept his word and stayed with Duo the whole night.       Duo woke up the next morning to find Quatre sleeping in the chair.  I surprised him that the other boy stayed all night when he could have taken any chance to leave during the night.  Maybe he would really keep his word.  Maybe he wouldn't have to be alone anymore, as long as they were together.