Part 1 – Chapter 1 – “I Am The Eggman”

(End of Sonic Adventure 2)

Sonic and Shadow, both in Super form, have to transport ARK to a safer place. They lock hands and yell, "Chaos Control!!" You know the rest, Sonic returns to ARK where everyone else is and tells them the sad news, Shadow is dead. "We did it together!" yells Tails (the fruit).


Shadow's Story

I woke up with an extreme headache, I mean, this thing hurt! Anyway, I woke up and could barely see. The last thing I remember was deciding to sacrifice myself for Maria, and to become a giant in the sky. Anyway, that's what I thought happened. I could feel the finger of Death touching me... I thought it was over. But I managed to get a look at death, and it was Omochao! The sometimes helpful but annoying robotic Chao that seems to be everywhere at once. As I lost consciousness I heard him say, "Welcome to Omochao Land..."

Now here I am, lying down on some grass and I have a really bad headache. Wait, I told you that already. Anyway, I hear this a whirling sound and I look up and mumble, "Wha-? A helicopter?"

"I'm Omochao, and I'm here to help you!"

"So am I!" "And me!" "Me too!"

I jump up and instantly awake. There are Omochao's everywhere! I grab the nearest one and ask, "Where the hell am I?"

"To perform a somersault, press B."

"That's all good and fine, but where the hell am I!?"

"Welcome to Omochao Land. I am Omochao #55"

I suddenly get another sharp pain in my head and lie down to rest.


Bob smacks his Dreamcast.

Bob: What the hell is going on? Omochao Land? What is this crap? This game should be called, 'Sonic Mis-adventure 3.' What a load of crap!

Ian: I am also ashamed.

Bob: Tell me about it!

He takes his Dreamcast and flings it out the window.

Bob: Good riddance!


Kent Lee, no relation to Robert E. Lee, was walking down the street when he heard some cursing. He looked up only to see a Dreamcast flying at his head! He catches it and has a very confused look on his face. He finally decides that this must be a sign from God. He runs home and plugs it in. The title screen says, "Sonic Adventure 3."

Kent: I heard about this, heard it sucked!

He decides to play it anyway. Suddenly his friend Fred comes in with a can of soda.

Fred: Sup? Sup? Whoa, you got a Dreamcast, what a loser!

He starts laughing and spills soda on it sending 1,000 volts of electricity into Kent and himself. They both suddenly disappear.


Bob, full name Robert, suddenly realizes that his Dreamcast still has other good games like Virtua Tennis and Sonic Adventure 2, so he looks out his window hoping for a miracle. He sees a scruffy looking guy running off with his Dreamcast.

Bob: Come back here!

But it is too late, the guy, Kent Lee, is long gone.

Bob: Come on Ian, let's go!

Ian: Here I come!

Bob: Don't do that.

Ian: Sorry.

They leave and follow the guy to his house. They are about to break in when suddenly another guy walks up to the house with a can of coke. They wait for him to open the door with a key he just happens to have, and Robert and Ian follow him.

They follow the Coke guy upstairs and see the Dreamcast, but no one is in sight.

Bob: Now's our chance!

Bob and Ian both grab it at the same time and also disappear.


Robert and Ian land on top of Fred and Kent in a place with lots of grass.

Bob: Hey! It's you, the guy who stole my Dreamcast!

Kent: Stole? You threw it at me!

Bob: You want a piece of me?

Kent: Bring it!

Fred and Kent start fighting Robert and Ian, and the latter team is losing badly. Robert suddenly remembers he is not very strong from playing Dreamcast all day, and Ian is the same. They are getting their butts kicked when Ian yells out.

Ian: Wait a tic, where are we?

Everyone stops and looks around.

Bob: I recognize this place... this is Omochao Land!

Fred: Omochao what?

Bob: Omochao Land!

Fred: What land?

Bob: Omochao Land!!!

Fred: Omochao what?

Bob: Shut the hell up!

Kent: Don't talk to Fred like that, he may be a little slow, but you're a loser too!

Bob: That's it, you're dead!

Kent: Bring it!

They fight for a few more minutes, with Kent and Fred at the advantage.

Fred: Wait a tic, how did we get in Omochao Land?

Bob: It's a place in the half-ass sequel to Sonic Adventure 2.

Fred: Oh...

Bob: ...

Ian: ...

Kent: ...

Omochao: Welcome to Omochao Land, I'm Omochao #68.

All: Ah!

Fred: How the hell did we get here?

Omochao: Welcome to Omochao Land, I'm Omochao #68.

Fred: ... Ok, we've been over that already, how did we get here?

Omochao #68: I sense electricity in all of you, you must have been shocked with a wet Dreamcast and transported here.

Bob: Does this happen a lot?

Omochao #68: Yes. In fact there's an interesting story about it...

Omochao #68 suddenly flies away.

All: ...

Kent: That was weird.

Dr. Eggman: I will conquer Omochao Land!


Why does this happen often? Will our heroes ever escape? Are Kent Lee and Ian really the same person? Find out next time on Dragonball Z, I mean, Welcome to Omochao Land!