Dreams and Shadow Memories Dreams and Shadow Memories By Starbuck_Jayne Starbuck_Jayne@mulderandscully.co.uk Rating: PG but you know I'm not very good with ratings! Spoilers: Requiem, PMP, Triangle, Je Souhaite Keywords: Post-Requiem, Scully angst, MSR Disclaimer: None of the characters in this story belong to me I am just borrowing them for a bit. They belong to Chris Carter, 1013 and Fox Archive: Anywhere at all just please keep my name and e-mail attached. Summary: After Requiem Scully reflects on the events of the last few years. Feedback: On my knees and begging for it. Author's Notes: Ok this is a sort of post- Requiem and post loads of other shippy episodes! It is dedicated to all the wonderful people who sent me feedback for my last few stories and especially Anne cos she is the best friend and fanfic author a girl could ever hope for! Also for Jill and Allison cos they are the best! Dreams and Shadow Memories Starbuck_Jayne Maybe she should have felt self-conscious, dancing in front of all those people. But she was oblivious to all around her, wrapped in her partner's arms, gazing into his warm hazel eyes. She smiled as he dipped her and twirled her; captivated by his own smile and lost in a moment she would treasure forever. As the song came to a close, Mulder drew her into his arms and placed a soft kiss on his forehead. Secretly she had wished for more, but they both new the dangers of a relationship inside the bureau... XXXXXXX Scully was startled to find herself back in the office, woken from her daydream by a partner who stumbled across the threshold, arms weighed down by stacks of X-Files Scully suspected dated as far back as J Edgar himself. "Geez, Scully, I've never read so much BS in..." he paused to catch a glimpse of the female agent. "Oh, hey, you've got a little something..." resting the folders on the desk he used his own chin to indicate a smudge of ink which was a result of Scully's unconscious pen chewing. She rubbed at the spot with her finger but it remained. "No, a little to the left...right! Up a bit...nearly there. Oh here, let me..." Doggett moved forward so as to wipe off the pen mark himself but Scully jumped back instantly. "No, er, I'll just go find a washroom," she stammered. The thought of another man touching her repulsed her and the situation brought back memories of her missing partner. Drawing a deep breath to control the tears, Scully stepped into the women's washroom. Relived to find it deserted, she set to work on the stain, rubbing at it in a mechanical way which highlighted the fact that her mind was really elsewhere... His face appeared behind hers in the mirror and she turned to meet his gaze, watching as the tiled walls swirled into wooden panels, portholes dotted along one side. She glimpsed a swish of ruby silk as Mulder drew her close; his strong hands rested firmly on her shoulders. "This is in case we never meet again..." "Wha...?" Was all she managed before his lips were on hers, fiery with passion yet strangely sweet. The initial shock gave way to desire and Scully became lost, kissing back as strongly as she was being kissed. It was she who pulled away first. This was all wrong: these memories were not her own. She had no recollection at all of this kiss, although the boat did seem strangely familiar... She was leaning over him as he lay in a hospital bed, their heads almost touching. "Scully...?" She jumped back, the flash of recognition sparking in her memory. "Yes?" she heard herself saying. "I love you." His eyes were so deep and truthful that suddenly she realised...she knew Mulder wasn't delirious at all. He'd been telling the truth about the Queen Anne, which had to mean... "I love you too, Mulder," she whispered, leaning over to gently kiss his forehead, "now get some rest." XXXXXX A wave of dizziness crept over her and she snapped back into focus, steadying herself with the aid of the icy cold sink. Taking a deep breath she shut her eyes and subconsciously moved her hand to rest upon her abdomen. "Ahh looks like you got it," Doggett winked as she walked through the door of their office. "What?" Scully's eyes shot up to meet his, suddenly wondering what her partner was talking about. "Ink," he smiled. "Hey, Dana, you fancy getting some lunch?" She winced at the use of her first name. "Agent Doggett, I'd really prefer it..." "Oh, sorry," Doggett raised his hands in apology. "So you don't want me to bring you anything? Sandwich? Salad?" "No, no thank you I'm fine..." Scully assured the eager agent, wishing he would leave her to her thoughts. She just really needed to be alone. Doggett finally departed and Scully relaxed slightly. She knew she needed to eat for the baby, but the very thought of food made her nauseous, thus causing her to occupy her time with filing and paperwork instead. She sat down in Mulder's chair and reached for his nameplate, delicately fingering the gold lettering. She had insisted Mulder's office remained exactly as it was, but had made the firm decision to have words with him about the mess. She lifted a folder from an unsteady pile in front of her. A photograph of a black-haired woman slipped out and Scully smiled upon recognising the geniah. Mulder never had told her what his final wish was, not even as she had lain on his sofa, his arm resting about her shoulders, gently massaging with his thumb. Occasionally, something in the film would amuse his partner and she would laugh softly. He would smile as well, not because of what was happening on the screen but for the simple reason that she was happy. They had fallen asleep in each other's arms for the third time in those past few months. Scully smiled sadly at the irony of it all- they had been in love for seven years and only when they finally let their feelings show did something happen to tear them apart. She rose to but the file in its rightful place back in the cabinet...not that anything had a rightful place where Mulder was concerned. She sighed-the clock told her it was only 1pm but she just wanted to go home: without Mulder the office held no interest for her anymore. XXXXXXXX Scully had made herself a cup of tea and had been preparing for an early night. She and Agent Doggett had a flight booked to Florida the next morning, and the lack of sleep she had been suffering recently displayed itself in the form of dark rims below her eyes. The tears flowed as they seemed to every night nowadays and she did not try to cease their flow. At work she had no choice but to be strong, and so by the time she got home the display of false emotion was too much for her to bear. XXXXXXX Balmy. Not hot and sticky like previous locations, balmy. So why, Scully wondered, was she so uncomfortable? The sheets of the motel bed had become clammy, and clung to her tossing figure in a way that made her feel almost chlostrophobic. Realising that the only means by which she could achieve comfort was to get up and sort out her sheets, she rose from the bed. The moon was shining that night, full and clear with a reflection that danced in the silver seawater across from where she stood. It was enough to draw Scully away from her motel room and out on to the balcony. Sighing heavily she folded her arms and leaned against the rail, which separated her from the carefree water. "Hey Mulder," she smiled, "it's me. Skinner wants your report on this little disappearing act you've pulled. On his desk. First thing." She smiled. Tears refused to come anymore and she scolded herself for wishing she could cry out loud. She laid a hand on the tiny bump, which was beginning to show beneath her pyjama bottoms, and sighed. "Just, just don't be too long ok?" XXXXXXX Starbuck_Jayne Starbuck_Jayne@mulderandscully.co.uk I would really really really appreciate feedback!!!! PLEASE!!!!!!
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