Annoying Anise
by Kat and Becca

DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognizable characters and places are the property of MGM, World Gekko Corp and Double Secret Productions. This piece of fan fiction was created for entertainment not monetary purposes and no infringement on copyrights or trademarks was intended. Previously unrecognized characters and places, and this story, are copyrighted to the author. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.


SG-13 filed into General Hammond's office. "George, what's up?" Cara asked.

General Hammond sighed, all too used to the flippancy of this partucular team. "We have some very
important visitors from the Tok'ra coming, so could you PLEASE keep your antics to a minimum
while they're here?"

"Um...how's about no?" Becca asked, insubordinate as per usual.

"What's so great about these Tok'ra anyway?" Kat asked.

"Absolutely nothing!" Bryn replies with a sigh. "They come, they insult, and they demand!"

"They call us infantile too!" Cara added in.

"Then we're supposed to be nice to them why?"

"Um...probably because they hate the Goa'uld as much as we do, and they
occasionaly help us out when they can be bothered," Becca replied
after a bit of thought.

"SG-13, I'm going to have to make this a direct order. You are NOT to insult,
offend, or pester our Tok'ra visitors. Understood?" Hammond demanded.

All four members of SG-13 sighed. "Sure, sure," Cara said, echoing the thoughts
of the group.

They filed out, grumpily.

"Just like him to take away all of our fun!" Bryn exclaimed.

****************

In the 'Gate Room, all the SG teams not off-world waited for the Tok'ra.
SG-13 was, as usual, in the back, where no one would see them.

The wormhole flared and three members of the Tok'ra stepped through. In the
lead was…

"Anise?" Becca cried disgustedly, soft enough so that only her team members
could hear. "Oh, man! I hate her!"

"What's so bad about her?" Kat asked, having not met her before.

"Only everything," Bryn replied, disgusted too. "We'd be doing Earth a favour
if we insulted her. Maybe she wouldn't come back?" She then asked hopefully.

Kat shrugged. "Maybe if we told her that implants are going out of fashion
she'd leave us alone?"

Cara cackled. "Kat, you are SO becoming one of us!"

"Poor you," Becca added.

"Can't we just kill her and be done with it?" Cara asked.

"Oh sure, I dare ya!" Becca cried. "I'll give you a medal for it..."

"I think Jack would, too," Bryn said, noticing that the Colonel looked
distinctly uncomfortable to see Anise-of-the-Torpedo-Boobs.

"What's up with the way he keeps sneaking glances at Sam?" Kat wanted to know.
"It's even worse than usual!"

"Remind us to tell you about when Marty died," Cara told her.

"Marty?" Kat asked.

"Yeah...Marty-Mr-Teeth." Becca said. "He was as bad as Anise! Trying to
steal Sam!"

"Anyways. Do you suppose George would consider us making nasty comments
behind their backs to be insulting or pestering them?" Bryn wondered.

"Does it matter?" Cara asked.

"Not really," Bryn agreed.

Anise walked over to them. "Cara, Becca, Bryn...perhaps you would consider
introducing me to your new team member?"

"It's Colonel, Lieutenant Colonel and Major to you, thank you very much!" Cara
pointed out coldly. "This is Miss Halcyon."

"Kat, this is Anise," Bryn continued.

Kat bowed. In an extremely polite tone, she asked, "Do your people consider
it inappropriate to wear clothes that actually leave something to the imagination?"

Anise blinked several times. "Excuse me?"

"It's just, your clothes are what I've discovered are often called 'slutty' on
Earth. I was wondering if there was a cultural reason behind that."

Anise stood, blinking her eyes and looking like a large (and WAY oversized in
some areas) goldfish, before turning on her heel and heading over to General
Hammond, obviously to complain.

"So, are we off then?" Kat asked conversationally.

Without replying, all four members of SG-13 fled the 'Gate room.

They didn't stop, until they were on one of the lowest levels, where they had
converted a virtually unused storage room into their own personal lab/rec room.

© Kat and Becca 2001

~ SG-13 Bios ~ SG-13 Fanfics ~ Quotes ~ Becca's Wallpapers ~ Bryn's funny pics ~ Cara's transcripts ~
~ SSA ~ Episode transcripts ~ GateCon ~ Free email ~ DJA main page ~