Playing With Tranq Guns
by Becca and Bryn

DISCLAIMER: All publicly recognizable characters and places are the property of MGM, World Gekko Corp and Double Secret Productions. This piece of fan fiction was created for entertainment not monetary purposes and no infringement on copyrights or trademarks was intended. Previously unrecognized characters and places, and this story, are copyrighted to the author. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is coincidental and not intended by the author.

Kat, Cara, and Mish were sitting in SG-13's lab/rec room doing what they always did: surfing the 'net for fanfic and chatting. Occasionally Mish and Kat would go off on tangents of typing in random names of characters they thought were cool to see what kind of weird websites they could find, but that was a strangeness to be explored another day. Suddenly Bryn and Becca burst into the room, giggling maniacally and toting a very large bag.

"Do we want to know what you two are up to?" Kat asked.

Cara thwaped her. "It's Bryn and Becca, which invariably means they're up to no good. *Of course* we want to know what they're up to!"

Mish gave Kat a disappointed look. "That was a most un-Kat like question."

"I know, I'm sorry," Kat said, hanging her head in shame. "I haven't had my daily requirement of coffee yet, I'm just not myself."

"Oh, poor Kat!" Becca exclaimed, horrified at the thought of not enough coffee in one's system. "Do you think you can drink a cup fast enough, or do you want Bryn to set up an IV?"

"Can I have an IV?" Kat asked hopefully.

"No, sorry Kat…we can't have IV's coming along where we're going with the stuff in this bag," Bryn said apologetically. "Becca…go make us all cups of coffee while I explain the game we're about to play."

"So what's in the bag?" Cara asked, poking the bag with her finger to see if it moved.

Bryn slapped her hand away and scowled at her. "Y'all ever play cops and robbers when you were kids?"

"Huh?" the other three members of SG-13 said in unison, looking perplexed.

"Well, since George, Jack, and just about everyone else on base won't let us have real guns for some odd, inconceivable reason," Bryn continued, ignoring the blank stares she was getting, "I figured we could play with these!" She pulled out from the bag five bright shiny tranquilizer guns, all fully loaded and ready for fun-filled game of annoy-the-crap-out-of-everyone-on-base.

"Ooooooh!" Cara said, staring at the pretty shiny things Bryn was waving around.

Mish, more practical and alien asked, "What are they, what do they shoot, and where does Mish get her own from?"

Bryn tossed one at Mish, who caught it and gave an FBT. "They're tranquilizer guns…they shoot darts filled with tranquilizers and there's yours," Bryn replied. "This way, we only knock them out cold for a little while and don't get in too much trouble!" She grinned evilly, which she was rather prone to do.

Mish's eyes lit up and she headed for the door.

"Mish!" Bryn called after her before she had gotten to the door. "The purpose of these is *not* to tranquilize Graham, tie him to a bed and have your way with him! We're going to play a game, so get back here!"

Mish pouted.

"Trust me, we'll have fun!"

"But can we go abduct cute guys *after* the game?" Kat asked hopefully.

"Sure." Bryn nodded.

"I've got dibs on Danny!" Becca yelled from over at the coffee machine where she was making extra strong coffee for everyone but herself (she much preferred coffee or mocha frappes for a quick caffeine boost… but all the rest of the time coffee was great).

"Ha!" Kat yelled back. "SG-1 are out on a mission at the moment! They won't be back for a few days!"

Becca swore in five different languages before bringing all the coffees over on a tray.

"Anyway! Back to the game!" Bryn growled at her easily distracted friends.

Before she could get any further in the instructions though, the alarm klaxons went off and the announcement "Off world activation" echoed through the base.

"That's odd," Cara said, "no one's due back today. Only two teams are off world and both left just a few hours ago."

"And why do you know this?" Becca asked. It was fairly normal for SG-13 to memorize SG-1's schedule, it made it all the easier to the stalk and harass them, but knowing the whereabouts of other teams wasn't usually something they bothered with. Basically, if they weren't objects of harassment, SG-13 didn't care about them.

"I was running an experiment to see if I could get Dex's auditory sensor to pick up conversations through concrete walls, so I tested it on George's office. It worked." Cara smiled.

"Ok, well, we're definitely going to have to hear about that later," Bryn replied. "But for now, let's go see who's here."

"Can we take the tranqs?" Mish asked. She didn't want to let go of her new toy quite so soon.

"Ya sure," Bryn said before tossing everyone else hers.

They ran out the door, and over to the elevator, Becca muttering all the while, "All this time I spend making coffee and you people just don't appreciate it…"

Kat gasped and quickly dashed back into the lab. She reappeared a moment later with a huge cup of steaming coffee. "Gotta have one for the road," she explained.

Within a minute SG-13 were in the control room, pushing a poor, unsuspecting airman out of the way so they could get a better view. Mish planted herself firmly beside Graham, who gulped and paled visibly. "KO dirk, ready to see the blue, shimmery thing," Mish said, indicating towards the still-closed iris.

"Incoming traveller, positive identification. It's the Tok'ra."

Kat immediately got an evil idea. "What if Anise is visiting?" Kat had had it in for Anise ever since their first meeting. As a matter of fact, so did the rest of SG-13.

All of SG-13, having had the same idea, now dispersed themselves to strategic positions around the crowd.

WHOOOOOOSH! The blue, shimmery thing opened and SG-13 pointed their tranqs.

Out stepped Anise and Dad, with two other Tok'ra carrying a big metal box type thing.

"Don't hit Dad!" Becca yelled as she opened fire on Anise.

Mish, who of course didn't know Dad, just shot at everyone that moved, seeing as it was *only* tranqs after all…

After successfully hitting Anise, Kat yelled out: "YYYYYEEEESSSSSS!!!" By this time the only people left standing were basically just SG-13 and General Hammond, since none of SG-13 wanted to hit him for fear of coffee rations and no missions with other teams.

"Uh…" Cara said, before yelling: "MOVE, MOVE, MOVE!!!"

SG-13 proceeded to run for their lives down the corridors to their lab/rec room, while General Hammond just seethed silently at the retreat of SG-13.

SG-13 skidded into their rec room in record time. They'd long ago discovered the quickest and easiest ways to get anywhere on base from just about any other place on base. It was just one of those ultimately important things they'd had to do instead of paperwork one time. (Another time they'd discovered the quickest way to get from one end of the corridor to the other was to take off their boots, take a running start, and play "ice skating" in their socks. Ok, maybe that had been the *funnest* way to get down the hall, they often got those two concepts confused.) Anyway, they made it there fast.

"Mish thinks it would be a very good idea if the door locked," Mish commented.

"Yeah, I second that!" Bryn panted.

"Uh, no lock," Cara said, peering at the door. "Think we could get the pool table in front of it?"

"I think we'd better try." Becca nodded.

"Wait! I have a better idea!" Bryn smiled. Reaching into one of the numerous cupboards which decorated one wall of the lab/rec room and mysteriously held whatever odd thing SG-13 might need, Bryn pulled out a flame thrower.

"A flame thrower?" Becca asked. "Don't you think that's a little overkill?"

Just then a loud and angry General could be heard yelling "SG-13!" at the top of his lungs as he marched down the corridors. The walls shook with the force of his voice.

"Overkill? No, I don't think so. He sounds pissed and I, personally, don't wanna know what he's gonna do to us. Does anyone else?" Bryn asked.

The rest of SG-13 shock their heads vigorously and stepped aside to let Bryn weld the door shut. They had a refrigerator, ajoining bathroom, pool table, computers, TV, and comfy couches, they could quite happily survive for the week or so they were gonna give George to calm down.

The End

©Becca and Bryn 2001

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