3.
02/20/06
Alpha Prime, Shit, I’m still only on Alpha Prime. Every time I think I’m gonna wake up back on Earth.
If base camp was bad then this place is ten times worse. It seemed a good deal at the time. An enforced tour of duty or three years in gaol. Now I’m not quite so sure. If we’re not patrolling, we’re sleeping and if we’re not sleeping we’re patrolling. I barely have time to jerk off let alone anything else. Not, of course, that we are allowed to actually do anything else. Shit. Alpha Prime.
Our new Lieuy arrived today. Shipped up from Earth to replace Lieutenant Novak who even now is making his way back home in a body bag. Well what’s left of him anyway.
I don’t envy this new guy, it can’t be easy taking on a squad knowing that his predecessor was blown into several tiny pieces by a booby-trap. Rumour has it it’s his first combat command. Oh well he’ll soon sharpen up, he’s gonna have to.
Listen to me, I’ve only been here three months and already I’m talking like a lifer. I guess three months out here is a lifetime.
Still he seems like a nice enough guy. Have to see what he’s like out on patrol.
02/23/06
Just got back from our first patrol with the new lieutenant. Fortunately it was fairly quiet, though quite why the settlers want to fight over such a desolate piece of shit as here I don’t know. As far as I’m concerned they are welcome to it. It’s cold, barren and totally inhospitable. Unfortunately there are also great oil reverses under the surface, rich pickings for whoever wins this bloodbath.
Back to our lieutenant…He knows his stuff; I’ll give him that. I also found out that he’s musical, always a bonus. And there is something else about him that I can’t quite put my finger on, oh well it doesn’t matter. I’m too tired to try and figure it out now. All I want to do is sleep for a year – some hope.
And so it went on. The next few pages are filled with pretty routine stuff, details of baselife, patrols and the such but they all help me to build up a picture of my grandfather. As ever more questions come. For instance I wonder what he had done to land himself in such a situation. What had he done to earn himself a prison sentence?
Sometimes there are entries for several days on the trot, but more often than not five or six days elapse between each one. One thing that I do notice is how more and more of his writings seem to be devoted to his impressions of and the actions of his lieutenant. Something which in itself strikes me as slightly strange.
Mesmerised I shift to make myself more comfortable and continue reading, until I come across an entry which literally sends my brain shooting off in a thousand different directions.
04/11/06 Where to start? Another, supposedly routine mission, escorting some oil company people out to one of the prospective sites. Except that we walked straight into an ambush. Two men down before we even knew what was happening, one of which was our communications link. We all dived for what little cover there was, pinned down on all sides but without our sat_link it was hopeless. We needed re-enforcements and fast. I still don’t know what made me do it; it’s not as if I am ever the one to play the hero, but the lieuy was getting seriously out of his depth and needed help. So I made a break for it over to where the comms guy lie, grabbed the sat_pack and dove back behind the boulder where the lieuy was desperately trying to issue five commands at once while figuring out how to get us out of there without incurring more casualties. I thought he would be grateful but no, he chewed me out for taking ‘unnecessary risks’. Excuse me sir but I have just saved your arse. (and a very nice arse it is too.) Jeez I am so dead if anyone ever reads this but then after what happened later I am now on very thin ice anyway and you know what, I’m not sure I care.
Anyway once we had eventually radioed for back up and managed to extract ourselves from that mess, I got called into the lieuy’s office for what I thought would be another dose of the verbal. I couldn’t have been more wrong…
* Flashback *
‘Don’t you ever do anything like that again!’ the lieutenant shouted at the impassive soldier standing to attention in front of him.
‘No sir.’
‘It was stupid, irresponsible and reckless.’
‘Yes sir. Permission to speak freely sir?’
‘Granted.’ The lieutenant’s anger subsided slightly.
‘At the risk of sounding presumptuous I believe I saved the mission and the lives of my fellow soldiers, Sir.’
‘That is as maybe, but I don’t want you to put yourself in such a position again. Do I make myself clear?’
‘Perfectly.’ The soldier looked straight ahead and straight into the eyes of his superior officer. The look he saw there both startled and intrigued him. Was he really seeing what he thought he was?
Daringly he asked. ‘May I ask the source of the lieutenant’s concern. With all due respect it isn’t the first time someone has acted like that on patrol. Why am I being singled out for such a dressing down? We risk our lives every time we step off this base. What I did today was nothing different.’
‘I am concerned because…’ a long pause as if the lieutenant was trying to find the right words to continue.
The soldier held his breath.
‘because,’ he dropped his voice low, ‘because I would never forgive myself if anything happened to you. Because I couldn’t live with myself if you got hurt, because…’ he raised his hand towards the man in front of him and then lowered it again.
‘because…?’ his sub-ordinate prompted, his eyes displaying his own hope in encouragement.
‘because…’ the hand came up and tentatively stroked the soldier’s cheek, ‘because I care about what happens to you, because I care about you, because…I think I’m falling in love with you.’
Instantly their lips were on each other and as their tongues demanded and were granted entry to the other’s mouth both knew that the line they were crossing was one of no return.