* * *
Sex, Drugs, and Harley Davidsons pt 1
by StarWindDancer
* * *
Mulder walked in the front door of his apartment. It had been a long tireing day and he still wasn't talking to Scully. He knew that she didn't blame him but it still was his fault, it was always his fault. His entire life attraked the freaks, weridos, wakos, and sociopaths. If he ever met a real, normal person, the person would probably run screaming in terror from him.
His neibors were corrupted. One was a writter who wrote stories that eventually came true (and nearly killed Scully in the process.) Another neibor shot her husband while drugged just because she could. They never called the police when something strange happened. Such as the regular breakins or people dieing in the hallways, leaving criptic messeges written in the victum's own blood.
The buroe was corrupted. Skinner got sick for a rutine background check, died, and came back to life with no explination. Spencer was the son of the most powerful man in the world and his mother was a dead alien hybrid. He also died in the office of the X-files with the bullet in his head the only evidence. Diana was a traitorus spy who left him just to go traveling around Europe to meet alien abductees. And Scully, well, she was Scully.
Even the people he met in cases who were supposed to be normal were not. One even tried to drop a cow on him.
No, Fox William Mulder was a living, breathing Bermuda Triangle. Life would never be normal again.
That's why he wasn't surprised to find a visitor sitting by the computer, illuminated by the light of the fish tank. Who was also tapping on the tank, scaring his fish.
Strike his earlier thought. Life would never be normal for Mulder.
Krycek glanced at him before going back to wiggle his fingers at the fish tank like little worms. The fish fell for it, following the fingers where ever he moved them.
Mulder just crossed the room to plop on his couch. Then he picked up the remote and flipped on the TV, intent on ignoring his visitor. Let the rat drop off his information and leave.
In a few moments Krycek did just that. He pulled out a manella envilope from inside the leather jacket to drop on the coffie table.
Mulder didn't even look at it.
Soon afterward Krycek went back to tomenting his fish instead of leaving. He tapped on the glass a few times.
Mulder saw the room brighten just a shade and twisted around to see what was going on. Krycek had lifted off the top to pour fish flakes in.
For a breif moment Mulder was angry. He fed those fish, fed them pretty regularily. They were still alive, damn it. Then Mulder realised what was going on.
He had a traitorus rat who had killed his father, broken into his apartment, given him more semi-trustworthy information on alien activities, and was now feeding his fish. Mulder laughed at the incredibility of his life. For his part Krycek just looked at him, regerstering his surroundings which made Mulder laugh even harder.
Half falling off the couch he said, "You can leave now, Krycek."
"Are you going to share the joke with the rest of the class?"
"Might as well. It's this," Mulder waved his hand around the apartment. "My life is more then screwed up enough that it's leaking, infecting anybody and everybody I touch.
"Nothing I come across is normal. Its all strange, bizzar, twisted, warped, or criss-crossed in some way. I could say that it all started when Samantha was kidnapped but that wouldn't be true. I was born odd. 'May you live in interesting times' isn't just my curse of birth, it's my motto."
Krycek sat back down, wiggiling his fingers at the fish again. "You're just now figuring this out." It was a statement, not a question.
"Well, yeah," Mulder said puzzled as the last of his laughter gave out. "Why wouldn't I?"
"I knew that long before I met you, Mulder. Life was not destined to be anywhere near the ideal normal for either of us. Just accept it and move on."
"What if I can't accept it? What if I want to be normal?"
"There is no true normal."
Mulder sank into his cushions, staring incredulously at the one armed assasine who seemed to also be a philosipher. What if he was right. Mulder wasn't cursed then, he was in hell.
Krycek rose out of the chair and accross the room in one smooth motion. He made Mulder think of cats hunting in the night. Thier teeth and eyes glowing in the TV camera crew's lights as they filmed for the Nature Channel. Krycek stopped at the door to turn around to look at Mulder.
"Aren't you comming?"
"Where are we going?" Mulder stood up to grab the envilope from the table.
"Leave it."
"Why?"
"We won't need it. Scully can handle it."
"Aren't we going to investigate the case?"
"No."
With that he left, leaving Mulder to follow Krycek or be left behind.
* * *
Three and a half hours later Mulder shakily got off the Harley Davidson. Overhead stars twinkled thier midnight chime. It was a peaceful scene, if it weren't for the loud music comming from the farmhouse.
Vaugly Mulder recognised it as Concherto in D Minor by Bach. Thundering organ notes chased each other in fast scales as the old vampire theme echoed over the tobacco feilds.
"Where are we?" Mulder screamed at Krycek.
"The middle of no where."
"I can see that. What are we doing here?"
"I want you to meet someone. Come." Krycek left, leaving Mulder to stand by the Harley or follow. Mulder put the only helmet, the one Krycek insisted he wear because it was the law, onto the seat and followed Krycek in.
Krycek walked up to the door and pressed the doorbell. The lightes in the house flickered. In a few moments a tall, brown haired women opened the door. Upon seeing Krycek she clapped her hands in joy. Next she started gestguring rapidly in what Mulder recognised as sign language. His jaw dropped when Krycek returned signs to her just as fast and able.
"This is Mulder." Krycek layed a hand on his shoulder. Mulder shook the lady's hand when she offered it. "Mulder, this is Sarah."
Sarah, for her part, beamed at Mulder. Next she waved them in past her. Inside Krycek winced at the extreamly loud music. He turned around to face Sarah and made motions with his hands from his ears to the ground. Elizabeth blushed before taking a remote control out of one of her pockets on her apron. Carfully she aimed it before depressing the button, turning the music off.
"What are we doing here, Krycek?"
"You're on vacation, Mulder. We're going to see what 'normal' people are like."
"This is normal?" Mulder asked incrediously as he took in his surroundings.
The house looked vaugely like something out of Martha Stawart magazines. It was beutifully decorated, Mulder had to admit, but the whole thing was slightly off. Plants covered every availible space. They were in jars of water or on pads of foam, as well as regular pottery jars. However the pottery jars were not normal either. They were beutifully decorated with elves, dragons, rabbits, moles, and other small creatures painted on or poking out between the foliage.
Wooden trellises lined the walls. At first Mulder thought they were nailed on over the wallpaper but it billowed, changeing Mulder's mind to make him think it was fabric attached to the trellises.
Mirrors were attached to the trellises in weird angles. Blocks of wood angled the mirrors just right to view other parts of the house. If he looked hard enough at one of them he could see into the bathroom which was obviously being reflected by another mirror.
"Mulder, Mulder." Krycek interuppted his inspection of the house. "Sarah want to know if you want anything."
"What is this place?"
"Her home. Do you want anything?"
"Umm, could I use the bathroom?"
"Yes, it's through there." Krycek pointed to one side of the hall way before turning around to sign back to Sarah.
Mulder followed the reflections to the bathroom, always going in the oposit direction from where he saw the bathroom. It was kind of wierd finding it in reverse.
*How have things been going?* Krycek signed to Sarah.
*Same since you were here last. I have started cross stitch but I doubt I will stay with it long. It takes forever.* Sarah led Krycek deeper into the house into the living room. A large sterio system took up most of one wall. The rest was covered with black and white photos, oil and acrilic paintings, handcarved wood decorations, homemade sculptures, and intricitly sewn quilts.
*Do you ever quit?*
*No, Alex, you know I don't. I love trying new things out.* She grinned at him as she guestgured for him to take a seat. *The local Hobby shop even tried to offer me a job but I told them no. I'm just too busy here.*
*You need to get out more. I worry about you here alone all the time.*
*You're a worry wart. I'm fine here. Nobody bothers me and I can do anything I want. But from time to time a certine somone does drop by to make my life interesting.*
*I'm not checking up on you. I'm taking Mulder on a trip, you're our first stop. We'll need to get some supplies.*
*You can go to the Wallmart tomorrow but for tonight, its a celibration.* Sarah grinned evily, her jade eyes dancing with mischife. She took the remote out of her apron, aimed it at the sterio to reset Concerto in D Minor. The sound of organs thundered in the house again.
Secounds later Mulder came in holding his hands over his ears. Sarah clapped her hands at him before guestguing at Krycek who interpreted for her.
*I'm sorry, Mulder, I'm not used to other people.* She turned down the sterio to less deafining leavels. *I have some lemonaide, if you would like.*
"Yes, please," Mulder nodded, taking a seat for himself. When she left, he turned to Krycek to say, "Who is she? Is she deaf?"
"No, she isn't deaf, she's mute. Its rude to talk about somebody behind thier back, esspecially where she can hear you, Mulder." Krycek gestgured to the woman in the next room pouring three tall glasses of lemonaide. "If you have questions, ask her. I'll interpret faithfully. Sarah hates it when I change her words."
The woman in question softly padded back into the room. Mulder noticed that she walked on the balls of her feet. She seemed to float over the bare wood floors into the room.
*Your tired. I'm sorry. Alex can stay in the bedroom and Mulder can stay in the guest room.*
"I can sleep on the couch. I usually do." Mulder said, not wanting to put his host out.
*Don't be silly. Your a guest and I have a perfectly good guest bed lying around gathering dust.*
"I suggest you take up her offer, Mulder. Sarah can be quite insistent when she makes up her mind."
At both their insistence, Mulder followed Sarah up the stairs into a bed room. She quickly explained where everything was, Krycek faithfully interpreting.
"Where are you going to sleep, Krycek," Mulder asked just before they left him in the room.
"I'll be sleeping in my room. It's just across the way."
Mulder nodded. He left the door open so he was able to see Sarah lean over and give Krycek a quick kiss on the cheek. She then left him to go into the room and she went downstairs, probably to continue what ever she was working on.
For a breif moment Mulder was jelious. It looked like Krycek was going to have a warm bed tonight, once Sarah finally got tired enough to go to bed.
"I should be the one sleeping with the rat," Mulder said silently. He shook himself. He should not be thinking about that. //Off limits subject,// his mind screamed at him.
Instead he turned to bed, letting the soft sheets envelope him.
The sound of "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star" as played upon a toy piano could be heard from downstairs.
"Sarah!" Krycek yelled. A loud thump quickly followed. Probably a pillow being thrown.
Soon the annoying piano was replaced by the soft, gentle sounds of an oboe playing some classical peice that Mulder barely recognised. It was quite soothing and before long he was asleep.
* * *
The sound of the organs woke Mulder up the next morning. He rolled over, burrowing his head into the pillow. Sarah was a wonderful woman but those organs would drive him insane.
Eventually he rolled out of bed and took a shower. Inside the bathroom he found several different mixtures of herbal shampoo, conditioner, and soap. Mulder looked around for a plane bar of dial but didn't find anything. When Mulder checked the clothes Sarah had provided for the day he found they had been hand made.
"This is rediculous. Doesn't she buy anything." Mulder complained to the empty room. He made a useless wish for his jogging sweats or t-shirts and jeans.
Downstairs he couldn't find the two. Giving up he helped himself to what was available in the kitchen. Mulder was almost done with his Trix, about the only thing he identified easily and that would make a quick meal, when the organs played out. While the track was turning over to the next one he heard the distinct sounds of fighting comming through the open back door.
Outside he saw Sarah in loose black pants and a camofloge t-shirt. Krycek was dressed in black jeans and matching t-shirt. They were both bare foot in the short grass circleing each other. Legs moved as if independent from the rest of thier bodies. Hands floated in the air, moving with silent strength as the two faced off.
In an instant they were on each other. Sarah comming in fast at Krycek with punches which were blocked by both arms. When that attack didn't succede she backed off to circle him once more.
Mulder noticed they both walked on the balls of their feet. Knees were bent so much that they lost several inches in hight. The two mirrored each other move for move as they circled.
As if by silent signal Krycek attacked Sarah, using his legs to take her out. Most blows were below the belt, intent on hitting knees or sweaping legs out from under her. With cat like agility she lept over the sweaps and dodged the kicks to her body. When Krycek tried to kick her in the face she grabbed his ankle and lifted. Krycek hopped around a few times, seemingly at a disadvatage.
Then Mulder saw Krycek's right arm slither out to strike in her belly causing her to drop the foot as she curled over.
Krycek bounced back to hop on his toes as Sarah got her breath back. She flashed him a few signs before the two started to circle again.
Silently the two moved, the sounds of "Night on Bald Mountain's" deep, resonating wind instriments covering up the sound of their feet rustleing the grass. Eyes intent on each other threw silent challenges until Krycek attacked again.
This time he went after Sarah with his hands. The prostetic limb was used like a club to her arms and head causeing her to concentrate her actions on avoiding it. The right hand, still flesh, slithered out to strick her in the torso, upper arms, and neck.
Hands grappled at each other, each trying to gain an advantage.
When that set of attacks didn't work, they backed up to measure each other up again. This is when Sarah drew out a knife and attacked Krycek.
In the blink of an eye, Mulder saw Sarah's wrist bent back, plundging the knife into her stomic.
"Krycek," Mulder yelled as he ran across the yard, pulling the young man off the woman. He stared in horror as the woman gripped the handle of the knife, teetering this way and that. With a final breath, she fell to the ground dead.
Beside Mulder, Krycek was laughing up a storm. "Sarah, don't scare Mulder like that. He's libel to go big, bad FBI agent and arrest me."
Sarah picked up the knife then proceeded to stab her hand several times. Mulder watched, disbeliving, as the blade dissapeared into the handle. She too was laughing as she demonstrated that the knife was a fake.
"Why were you fighting like that?"
"Sarah's my sparing partner," Krycek said as he and Sarah went into the house. "I practice with her, trying to get used to my new arm."
Krycek lifted the plastic prothesis. Inside the house he took off his shirt, letting Mulder, for the first time, see the enormity of the disfigurement.
Leather straps held the plastic tight to the flesh. The straps were quickly unbuckled by Sarah, who then laid the arm on the table. Knife and burn marks left the stump a mass of flesh. The whole area was a red, swollen mass, no doubt due to the abuse Krycek had put the arm through during the work out. Sarah's hands soothed over the marks, helping the blood circulate. She poured on some fragrent fluid she picked up out of the cabnets.
Mulder tried not to stare but couldn't help himself. He kept on thinking that it could have been him, he nearly had his arm cut off. Part of his brain said that he could have stopped Krycek's disfigurement but that voice was quickly squelshed. The rat deserved it.
Sarah left Krycek and took out a pan of brownies from the oven. She carefully cut off a small piece then placed it in Krycek's mouth.
"Thanks, Sarah," he smiled. "You spoil me so well."
*I know I do, but somebody has to. * She went back to rubbing his back and arm stump.
Mulder dumped what was left in the sink. He needed to get out of there. The silent comunication of the two was maddening. Before he left he grabbed a slice of brownie to eat on his way.
He had barely gotten it to his mouth before he found his hand in a bone crushing grip. Sarah twisted his arm until the brownie fell to the floor.
"Mulder, never, ever eat my brownies. God, don't you have any manners. You ask before you grab something."
*Sing, Alex, I love to hear you sing.* Sarah pressed several buttons on her remote and soon the first cords of "American Pie" drifted through the house.
"What did she say?"
"She wants me to sing."
"You can sing?"
"Shh, A long, long time ago. I can still remember how that song used to go..." Krycek's voice was sweet and whistful.
Mulder watched entranced as the mornful sounds floated out of the sterio, echoed by Krycek so skillfully that Mulder had trouble seperating the two. He could tell that Krycek did have a better voice for it. The man felt the song instead of singing it. He had closed his eyes, letting his voice dominate.
As the chorus ended out and the verse came Krycek flashed Sarah an angry look but continued singing. Jerkidly he signed something at Sarah who laughed. Mulder looked around in confusion. Sarah pulled out a note pad and wrote something down before handing it to Mulder with a big grin on her face.
*Alex is mad at me because I'm playing the long version.*
"Is he going to sing the whole thing."
Sarah nodded at him as she continued to listen to Krycek. Mulder contined to iron out the quilt squares.
As the song wound down Krycek gave a big yawn during the last set of "Drinking whisky and rye, saying this will be the day that I die."
"You know, Sarah isn't normal."
"She wasn't supposed to be."
"Why then did you bring me here?"
"Sarah would have been furious if I didn't stop by." Krycek said as he started the Harley. "I also wanted to see her."
"Is she your girl friend or something?" Mulder asked. The intimicy the two displayed over the past two days comming to mind.
"No, she's my twin sister." Krycek said as he gunned the engine and took off. Mulder could do nothing but hang on for the ride.
* * *
Days later after Krycek and Mulder left Sarah had a visitor.
"Good evening, Sarah. May I come in?" The man at her door way inhailed deeply from the cigerette clutched in his clawed hands.
*Get out.* She signed as she bared her teeth at the man.
"Now, now. There is no need for that. I know you can speak."
*I will never say anything to you. I will not speak in your presence. Now go.*
Cancerman moved past her into the house. Sarah followed her intruder inside.
"Lovely house. You have certinly made it into a home."
*A home you are not welcome in.*
"You know what I came here for."
*Waite here. I'll go get the vaccine.*
Sarah watched the mirrors. Behind her she could see Cancerman following her. Anger flared through her. Because of his vial presence the house would feel unclean for weeks. It would also take forever to get the musty smell of his cigerettes out.
Cancerman followed her to the back of the house into the kitchen. Sarah opened the broom closet, flipped on a swich behind the mop head, and pushed the back wall out. The secret door swung open with the attached broom and dustpan. She glared at him as she stepped over the mop bucket into the secret room.
Inside she closed the door behind her leaving the two basked in blue light. From inside one of her pockets she with drew a key ring to unlock the next door. A stairway appeared in which she decended.
In the basment long black tabletops lined the walls, covered in various lab equipment. The room was basked in a yellow glow from special lights above. Exotic plants lined one wall, the burble of machinery was heard as they spreayed mist on them to keep them moist.
Sarah glared at the Cancerman before she unlocked one of the lockers and withdrew a case. From inside she took out two vials of peuce green liquide which she put on one of the tables, not wanting to touch the infectious Cancerman.
"Quite a set up you have here." He said impressed. The glowing cigerette rose to his lips.
*No thanks to you.*
"I could get you a better lab. Your work with toxins as well as the vaccine would be a valuable asset to my organisation."
*I will never work for you.*
"You already do," he gestgured with the cigerette hand. Ashes fell from the tip to spread onto the table tops.
*I do not. I just hand over the vaccine so you can give it to people who need it.*
"You can help so many more people by working for me."
*You will just twist my work. No, I am happy here.*
"Alex enjoys working for me. Why let your brother have all the fun? Have you seen him recently?"
*No.*
"You wouldn't be lying to me, now would you."
*No. Just take the vials and leave. You are not welcome here.* Sarah reached over and grabbed the glowing cigerette. She threw it on the floor to ground it out. *No smokeing eaither. You could damage the plants.*
"Your lucky I need you, my dear. I have killed people for less."
*Your lucky your still useful to me. I have killed for more and I could still kill you.*
"Isn't that your brothers department."
*Yes, and one word from me and he'll come here to kill you. You would make excelent fertaliser.*
"Watch your place. I won't tolerate such insolence."
*I'm through listening to you. Now leave.*
"Fine, my dear." Cancerman picked up the puce green liquide. He was turning to leave when he said one last barb, "Oh, and if you see Mulder, please tell him I am looking for him also."
Sarah flipped him the bird at his retreating back.
"I saw that." Cancerman said as he moved down the hall.
Sarah pounded her fist into her elbow causeing her other arm to jump up. It was the rude way to say *Up yours, ass hole* in sign.
* * *
(
geocities.com/starwinddancer/stories) (
geocities.com/starwinddancer)