Jock Test
For you jocks, wanna-be's or jock haters here is the Jock Test. Give yourself 1 point for each yes answer and then divide that number (after you are finished) by 100. That is how much of a jock you are.
Have you ever
participated in a sport?
participated in an organized sport?
started?
started for reason other than because the person in front of you got hurt?
started because you were related to the coach?
played in a championship game?
won?
cried after losing?
cried after winning?
spent more than six hours in a year training for a sport/event?
in a month?
in a week?
in a day?
for three or more consecutive days?
worn a jock strap?
been in a locker room?
changed in a locker room?
showered in a locker room?
while others were present?
members of the opposite sex present?
been involved in a serious discussion while nude (or toweled) in the
locker room?
been addicted to a sport?
had a runner's high?
orgasmed during an athletic event?
participated in two sports in a year?
three?
four or more?
injured someone during an athletic contest?
on purpose?
with premeditation?
have you ever boasted about your team's record?
about your own ability
about another's ability?
referred to a perofessional athlete by his/her first name?
had a professional athlete refer to you by your first name?
had your name in a newspaper/magazine beacuse of a sporting event?
more than once?
more than five times?
had an article written about you?
been elected to an all-star team (all-league,section,state,american?)
made a noise during an athletic activity?
that you couldn't reproduce by any other means?
made a comment about size,length,texture of crap?
taken a picture of it?
scratched your genital area?
in public?
even though they didn't itch?
pissed in a cup?
failed a drug test?
used steroids?
been tested for a hernia?
by a doctor of the opposite sex?
enjoyed it?
gone in to be tested again a week later?
drank alcohol?
more than a six-pack at once?
twelve pack?
case?
more than a keg?
beer-bonged?
with a goldfish in it?
think the goldfish ads "kick?"
spilled beer on yourself?
while chugging?
in a contest?
puked?
on someone?
during an athletic contest?
while training?
instructed someone on how to play a sport?
referred to a sports play by name?
talked about sports?
for an hour?
two?
five?
done a school project about sports?
studied a playbook?
instead of doing classwork?
received a better grade because you were an athlete?
had your coaach for a teacher for a class other than PE?
been patted on the butt by the coach?
by abother player?
to another player?
enjoyed it?
had jock itch?
walked funny because of it?
been hit in the genitals during an athletic event?
stayed after practice for more work?
competed with a possibly career-ending injury?
taken drugs to avoid pain from an injury?
had your career 'ended' by an injury?
come back?
read the comic book version of a major literary classic instead
of reading it for real?
use words with only one or two syllables habitually?
considered a grunt a word?
had sex on an athletic field/court?
been embarrassed by your apparent lack of intelligence in public?
by that of a friend?
Compared genitals with those of another?
beat up a nerd?
Scoring:
0-20%
You hate sports! Yeah!
21-40%
Your favorite movie is RHPS or Revenge of the Nerds.
41-60%
Probably a soccer person, the only decent sport out there.