CHAPTER FIVE - CRUEL IRONY
It had begun to grow cold in the medical centre. It had always been much colder this deep underground and the craggy, cavern walls did little to preserve any heat. The air was slightly damper than above ground where there was sun and wind to freshen it, but here there was n earthy smell all around that constantly assaulted the nostrils.
Once Sammy had been used to this strange smell but having lived above ground for many months now, he found it discomforting. He shivered slightly, cold having invaded his body after sitting still for so long. He stared down at his brother and smiled at him cuddled beneath a thick blanket, oblivious to the cold.
He still had B’s hand clasped within his own and he gently massaged B’s fingers, trying to ease him back into consciousness. He looked about him as he yawned, wondering how much longer Brian was going to be in the meeting.
“Here you go, Sammy.”
He turned to see that Howie had returned form his brief visit to the kitchens and now had two steaming mugs in his hands. He carefully handed one over to Sammy’s free hand.
“Thanks,” Sammy murmured as he sipped the hot liquid making sure none spilled out of the mug and onto B.
“How’s Lori?” Howie asked as he sat down beside Sammy. “You two are usual inseparable.”
Sammy smiled at the thought of his loving fiancée. He had met her when they first move out to the village and it had not taken the couple long to fall in love.
“She’s fine,” he whispered. “A little shaken after the attack but she’s okay. I introduced her to Kristen before I came here so that she would have some company.” He sighed as he stared down at B. He knew Lori would want to move out of this base as soon as possible. She was already uncomfortable with the thought of being locked underground for a few days and yet B could be here for weeks. Sammy couldn’t leave B now though. He had practically raised him and he would not abandon him now. Lori was loving and understanding and she knew that Sammy had a duty to his little brother, even if Brian was here as well to take care of him. If she wanted she could move to the village and then Sammy would join her as soon as he could. He knew they were strong enough to last through a brief separation and she would surely be happier on the surface, but Sammy was reluctant to let her go alone. What if other villages were attacked? “I need to tell her that B has to stay here.”
“He’ll be all right and you can come and visit him,” Howie said softly.
“I’m not leaving him, Howie. This is my baby brother. It doesn’t matter how old he gets, he’s still a baby in my eyes. He needs me more than ever. He needs me to help him understand Brian. I can’t leave him,” he replied. Lori needed him to and he knew that, but she could live without him for a brief time. B was going through hell and it would intensify even more when he realised that he was going to be forced to stay here.
Howie smiled at him. “He’s so lucky to have such a good brother. And Brian is lucky to have you both as sons.”
Sammy smiled shyly. He had always tried hard to be good for Brian, knowing that he had so much to thank the man for. Brian had taken him in when nobody else wanted him and Brian had suffered to save Sammy. The incident was only vague now and he had to concentrate hard to remember anything but he knew that Brian had done more for Sammy then he could ever repay.
“I try,” he said. “And so does B.”
“They don’t get on do they?”
Sammy shook his head. “It started less than a month after we rescued Dad from the mines. B just expected him to be identical to the father he had just lost.”
Howie sighed. “He’ll adjust. He loves Brian and Brian would give the world for him. They’ll come together soon.”
“I hope so,” Sammy prayed. The tension between them had steadily grown throughout the months and on some days it was almost unbearable. Howie was right though. Some days B and Brian would behave like a normal family and Sammy was just waiting for that to become normality, like he hoped it would. Most of the time they were both just too stubborn to back down when either of them was in the wrong. “B thinks Brian hates him sometimes.”
“I’m sure he’ll think differently when he sees how worried your father has been.”
“Yeah.”
Howie drained the rest of his coffee and he yawned. “I’m gonna get back to my room before my daughter comes looking for me. She’ll be furious if she thinks I’ve left her on her own!”
“Okay. Thanks for checking up on us.”
“You’re welcome. Brian’s like my brother and that makes you and B family. Let me know when he is up to visitors. Tessa really wants to see him. She wanted to come down now but I didn’t want too many people down here to crowd about B and she was a little shocked after the attack so it thought she should rest. I promised I’d give her an update.”
“He’s gonna be fine,” Sammy said, turning back to his sleeping brother. “Just fine.”
“So don’t worry about him.”
Sammy watched his friend’s retreating back. He was lucky to be surrounded by so many friends and B was lucky too. He may be forced to remain here for a while but at least they would nearly all be familiar faces.
“Mmmm.”
He suddenly glanced down, his heart beating slightly louder inside of his chest as he saw B’s face twitching. He clutched his hand tighter. “BB?”
B gave another faint whimper and his eyes slowly flickered. Sammy watched anxiously and leaned closer, praying that he would see the green eyes and receive some form of recognition. B stirred and yawned and his hands instinctively clutched the blanket closer to him. His remaining hand, still held in Sammy’s, he suddenly decide to drag beneath the blanket to keep it warm and Sammy smiled at his disorientated, sleepy brother even though his arm was now being twisted at an odd, uncomfortable angle.
“Ow, B. Um, can I have my arm back?” he asked, trying to pull his fingers out of B’s but failing as the boy clung onto them.
“Uh?” B asked, his voice thick and slurred with tiredness. His eyes finally flickered open to reveal the unfocused green orbs and he suddenly seemed to realise that he had three hands. “Dad?”
Sammy saw the hope brewing in his eyes as he saw B staring up at him, his eyes still unfocused and probably seeing nothing but blobs, but there was hope in them. B wanted him to be Brian. B wanted Brian to be the one who was with him.
“Wrong relative,” Sammy replied sadly. B was always worrying that Brian hated him. He had wanted Brian to be here now so that thought could be completely obliterated from his troubled mind.
B’s eyes were full of confusion for a moment before he finally recognised him. “Sammy.” There was a faint flicker of disappointment there but it was quickly resolved when he squeezed Sammy’s hand and smiled a tiny smile for Sammy. Even though he wasn’t Brian, B was very pleased to see him. “Tired,” B muttered.
“Don’t worry, it’s natural,” Sammy assured him. “Try and keep your eyes open bro. You’ll go straight back to sleep again otherwise.”
With a visibly great effort, B wrenched his eyes open and gazed up at his brother. He slowly turned his head to stare about his surroundings. “I recognise this place…”
“It’s Darren’s base,” Sammy said quietly. “He sent people to rescue us from the village.”
“Village? I remember fire…” His voice was quiet, frightened from the traumatising memories of what had happened. Sammy had felt sick when he saw Brian being helped to limp towards him and then there had been B being carried in Nick’s arms. Brian refused to talk about what had happened and the burns on his face and arms had showed the hell he had been through to get B safely out of that fire. If only B knew…
“The Gerai attacked us, remember? But we’re safe now,” he added as he felt B tense slightly. “No one can get to us here.”
B breathed deeply for a moment and Sammy could hear a slight rasping as the boy breathed. Nick had warned them that he might find it difficult to breathe for a while. “Dad?” he asked after a while.
“He’s fine,” Sammy assured him. He watched miserably as B glanced about him, searching for Brian and a sign that his father cared for him. In B’s eyes there was none. “He saved your life, B. He rescued you from the fire.”
“Where is he now?” The voice was almost pleading. B wanted Brian here with him now. Sammy knew that there had been another row between them just before the fire broke out.
“He’s in a meeting.” He couldn’t run and find Brian now. By the time he arrived, B would have already fallen asleep again. “Darren needed to talk to him. He wanted to stay with you. He’s been with you ever since we arrived.” He could tell B did not believe him. He really did believe that Brian did not care about him. That was untrue, Sammy as well as almost everybody else knew how much Brian hated it there B did not get along with him. He often had found his father sat alone at night, thinking about how to make things better with B.
B slowly tried to sit up, but whimpered slightly. “Ow, I feel sick.”
“Stay where you are,” Sammy said. “I’m here with you.” He held his and B’s clasped hands up. “You don’t need to move.”
“Is everybody else okay?” B asked.
“Most,” Sammy replied. “Howie was down here to see you,” he added to change the subject. B did not need to know about the people who had not survived the Gerai attack. “Tessa will come and see you later too… and Kevin and the others.”
“Howie? Tessa? They’re all okay?” he asked hopefully.
“Fine, they’re fine.”
“Good.” B yawned again and slowly his eyes closed sleepily. “How long am I going to feel like this? I’m so tired.”
Sammy released B’s hand so that he could place it under the covers where he could b warm and gently helped to tuck him into bed. “For a while. Nick says you’re definitely going to get better though and that there is nothing to worry about.”
“That’s a relief. How long am I going to be stuck underground for though?”
Sammy bit his lip slightly, glad that B’s closed eyes could not see the apprehension that had suddenly crept over his face. Did he tell him or not?
“We’re not sure. Brian is talking with Darren now about what to do with the villagers,” Sammy lied. He would let B live in ignorance for now. He would only get upset when he found out and Sammy wanted to postpone that for as long as possible.
B went silent and for a moment Sammy thought that he had almost drifted back to sleep again before he spoke. “Why isn’t he here?”
“I told you he had to go to a meeting.”
B did not reply and only pressed his head deeper into the pillows. He didn’t believe him.
Sammy could have cried at the cruel irony of the situation. More than anything Brian wanted B’s love. B was Brian’s son and he loved him. He had never been there when B was a child and Sammy knew that Brian was desperate to make that up to him now. He had almost been in tears while they waited for the results to come through about B’s condition.
He had sat by his bedside watching over B ever since they arrived in the base. Through all the confusion and the tears from other people in the medical centre, he had stayed by B’s side.
But when B finally awoke, Brian wasn’t here… and B thought that he wasn’t here because he didn’t care.
“B, he was so worried,” Sammy tried to explain.
B did not reply. Sammy did not know if he had fallen asleep by now or if he was still disbelieving his words. If only B realised…
Sammy could still remember his conversation with Brian recently and the way his father had sat outside on the grass one night. His eyes had been haunted and melancholy as he spilled his heart out to Sammy.
“Sammy, I don’t know what to do! I try so hard! I try to look after him but he tells me that I don’t give him any freedom. What do I do? Why doesn’t he like me? Why am I such a bad father to B? He doesn’t want me, he wants the younger version of me that he loved! I’m just a strange impostor to him!”
Brian had been in despair, but Sammy did not see why. They were both trying too hard to please the other and each of them were trying to behave like people they weren’t. Why weren’t they patient enough to give this some time?
Sammy carefully made sure that B was warmly wrapped in the blanket as he ran a hand through his blond hair in despair. Things were going to be even more tense between B and Brian when they finally met again. The all important, reassuring moment B had awoken from his deep sleep, Brian had not been by his side. It only made thing appear even worse from B’s point of view.