48 hours... If it's long enough for Eddie Murphy and Nick Nolte to track down a couple of escaped convicts on a killing spree, you'd think it'd be long enough for Saddam to pack an overnight bag and go on a nice holiday with his family. He's been working so hard lately, I think he needs some time off. Being an evil dictator sure takes a lot out of you, or so I hear.

Maybe what Saddam needed was Another 48 Hours... actually no, nobody needed that. So, we go to war.

Females, gaymales and Who Magazine are currently in mourning of the war's first victim... the red carpet at this years Oscar ceremony, withdrawn because terrorists might see it as a good opportunity to get rid of our much loved celebrities. I don't know why they're worried, I'm sure Bruce Willis could stop them.

I think it's a bit short sighted of the academy though. Instead of looking at it in such a negative way, they could have looked at it as a way to weed out some unwanted celebrities. Let's roll out that red carpet and march Britney Spears & Fred Durst, Freddie Prinze Jr. (and senior while we're at it... I don't know who he is but he needs to be punished for creating Jr.) and the entire cast and crew of The Rules of Attraction right down the middle in full view of any terrorists who may be there to check out the fashions. But first we need to find a way of blowing up James Van Der Beek twice. Once just isn't going to cut it for me. Thank Christ for cloning technology.

But war is no reason to stop enjoying our favourite things... Chinese food and bourbon. Let us enjoy these while they are still radiation free... Actually, I'm not so sure that Chinese food is radiation free. Sweet and Sour pork certainly has an unnatural glow to it. Hmmmmm.

Hopefully, I will see you all next week. Until then, to quote the little monster (if you look you can see his bum) after the end credits of Buffy; "Grrr. Argh."