GEMINI:

LIKES
Talking
Novelty and the unusual
Variety in life
Multiple projects all going at once
Reading

DISLIKES
Feeling tied down
Learning, such as school
Being in a rut
Mental inaction
Being alone

this is me. this is how i usually feel, or at least for right now. right now, i'm bored, alone, tired of school, and feeling stuck. every thing i could possibly dislike and hate. grrrr.........

my parental units are driving me absolutely stark raving crazy. ever since i got a car and could drive far far far away from them they've gotten to be very restrictive, which i have no tolerance or patience for. they don't like some of my friends. they don't like how i seem to disappear and conviently don't tell them where i am. my mother wants me to stay home and be her friend cuz she's got none. unfortunately for her, i have no desire or want to be her friend. i don't even really like her most of the time. actually most of the time i don' like any one in my family. they interfere too much in business that is not their own, but mine.

i don't like how they suddenly want to step in, dictate my life and such. yeah their my parents, and yeah i guess they have some say, but they can't control everything, and i refuse to let them. i don't want help, i want to figure things out for myself. it might take awhile and i might confuse myself further, but i'd like to say i did it all on my own. it feels then like a greater accomplishment. i got my problems, and they're my problems that i gotta figure out. i don't want them.

i hate it when they threaten me. say they're going to take away my car, my TKD, my ability to travel to certain places or see certain people. i don't like being threatened. you threaten me, i automatically get deffensive and hostile. believe me, it's not pretty. especially when they threaten me with violence, or use it. family sucks there is no way around it. second born and first loser, that's me. i'm the wild one and the one they say is outta control. it's funny how if i'm so wild, then why don't i have a record with the police, or ever failed a course in school, smashed the car up, gotten blind drunk or high. yeah i'm realy wild, maybe a little crazy these days, but that's about the extent of it.

they hate my friends, they don't even know them and they hate them. say i'm too good for them, then turn around and say i'm a loser and won't amount to much. then if i'm such a loser why don't they leave me alone and let me the loser i am? thank god i've never told them that much else about my personal life, or love life for that matter. that's the last thing i need. and i got enought problems in that. i don't need them adding to it.

guys....::sigh:: too many mens and not enough attention. or something along those lines.. i'll figure it out one day...

so till then i'm gonna be second born, and first loser. gonna be reckless and wild i guess that's all i got these days, and as long as i'm happy and can be content with myself, then what else matters. we're all gonna die one day soon, might as well say you did something with yourself, and had some fun too. i'd rather not look back and say how that all i ever was, was unhappy and bored. i'd rather be wild and happy and living my own life...