CHAPTER16COC

CHAPTER 16

Zarifa Cholena approached her apartment door and paused. She stared at the door, knew it was a door, but she wasn’t seeing a door.
What she was seeing was the end of her way of life.
This would probably be the last time she ever walked into the place she had called “home” for over five years.
After leaving Leffner for dead, (funny how little that bothered her), she’d checked on the status of Miriam Gonzalez’ ship. Astounded, but grateful, when she learned that it was still moored in the loading dock.
Nonetheless, the hairs on the back of her neck rose as she contemplated why the merc hadn’t left Polaris Station yet. Remembering the brutal description of Riddick’s capture that Leffner had so enjoyed telling her, she had to accept that there was a very good chance the man she loved could be close to death.
The ethereal episode in the service tunnel, where their minds had touched, kept replaying in her thoughts. He’d seemed weak and in pain. And hopeless.
But if The Hollerste, the merc’s ship, was still on the station, she couldn’t abandon hope herself.
Not that she rated her chances against the brutal mercenary as anything higher than a snowballs in Hell. The only real “qualification” she saw herself as having was the ability to survive deadly situations. And if she was honest, each time had probably been more a case of luck.
Richard would’ve moved Heaven and Earth to help her. Zar figured she would have to give up Heaven and Earth to save him.
She’d have to cut Audrey and Hill loose. It made her gut burn in regret, but she couldn’t see any other way. If Richard was alive, and they managed to escape from the merc’s ship, they would have to high tail it off the station. Not sure if Miriam had already notified Slam City of her prize or not. Polaris Station would not be safe. Even if they killed her.
All she could do would be to send them to Imam on New Mecca. She and Richard had kept in touch with him off and on since he’d left the station. He was the kindest man she had ever met. And he loved Audrey almost as much as Richard did. Zar had no doubt that he’d welcome the baby also.
She was right. Contacting him from the loading dock, she had quickly told him everything. Then begged him to help her by taking in the two kids. He hadn’t hesitated a second. Just told her to put them on the next transport out. He would meet them come Hell or high water. He’d treat them like they were his own for as long as they were with him. Even if it was forever. Zar had broken down in tears at the gentle cleric’s generosity and kindness. There’d been so little of it in her life lately.
She had finished off the communication with the name of the ship she was going to book for Audrey and Hill, plus their arrival date and time.
And asked for him to pray for her and Richard.
It went against every bone in her body to abandon the girl and the baby. She had promised herself numerous times that the children who’d become her own, would never face danger at her hands. That she would die before letting any more harm come to them. But the fact remained that there was no one else to help Richard. If he was still alive, she would rescue him or die trying.
First she had to make sure The Hollerste couldn’t take off. That was solved with some confusing and contradictory orders she put into the loading mainframe. Whenever Miriam did request permission to depart, it would set off an almost never ending loop of confounding program directives.
It would take hours for the operators to make sense of it. And more importantly, until they had it figured out, they were not allowed to release the ship. A hard and fast rule that the Station vigorously enforced. No one left Polaris until all the P’s and Q’s were correct.
The Hollerste grounded, Zar knew she had to take the time to let Audrey know the situation.
So she now found herself staring at the door of the place that had shown her safety, love, the fever of lust, the once thought unrepeatable joy of motherhood.
There was no one to blame for the things she was about to give up. She’d known from very early on in their relationship exactly who and what Richard B. Riddick was. And though she was a naturally optimistic person, a tiny part of her had always known that her life would never be the same after he came. There would be good, and there would most definitely be bad. She just hadn’t known the sacrifice would be this big. This painful. A sacrifice that went against the very grain of her soul.
Taking a deep breath, she passed her hand in front of the door sensor and entered the opened portal.
The dining area was empty, but she heard Jack making nonsense noises that only babies seemed to understand. She must be in Hill’s room. Changing or playing with him.
Zar closed her eyes and inhaled deeply of the scents that pervaded the apartment. The unique smell of infant. Leftover odors of cooking from many family meals.
Richard’s own personal smell. Masculine and tangy, it marked the rooms and all who lived within its walls, as his. Made up from a variety of sweaty activities. Honest hard work, strength gifting body building, deep, primal, soul capturing sex. And the subtler aroma of worry for those he cared about.
Would she breathe these scents ever again? Only God knew.
Opening her eyes she found Audrey standing in the doorway. An almost adult look of fatality on her face. She obviously sensed that her life was about to change in a very major way.
“What is it?!”
There was little benefit in sugar coating the ugly facts.
“Richard’s been taken by a mercenary. Her name’s Miriam Gonzalez. Leffner led her to him. He’s not a threat anymore, by the way. And Audrey, I’m sorry sweetie, but Toni is dead. Gonzalez murdered her to get to Richard.
She’s the...uh... woman you saw in here a few days ago. The one Richard kicked out. He didn’t know that she was a merc. No one knew...”
Jack’s stricken eyes shifted to the floor. “He kinda told me that he wasn’t totally kosher. But....I never thought...”
Zar tiredly rubbed her face tiredly while replying. “I know, I know. We deliberately kept his past from you. It was safer for you that way.”
“What’d he do?”
Zar stared at the teen-ager for almost a minute. Weighing the wisdom, considering fairness.
Fuck it, the kid had a right to know. It was her life getting screwed up the behind as much as any ones.
“His real name is Richard B. Riddick. He’s an escapee from Slam City. And there’s a very high price on his head.”
“Riddick? I’ve heard that name before...” Zar knew the instant Audrey made the connection. Her expression became a mixture of amazement, horror and disbelief.
“The psychopath?! The one that likes to slice people up?! Wait a minute! You’re telling me HE was on the Hunter-Gratzner?! And he rescued me?!
This doesn’t make sense! Why would a murderer save the life of some kid? Why would he stay here with us?”
“I know what kind of rep he has, kid. But take my advice, don’t believe everything you’re told or hear. He isn’t the madman the ASF made him out to be. The character assassination was done for their profit. And though he has killed, there were extenuating circumstances. Well...most of the time.”
Zar realized she was coming close to making excuses for him. He’d admitted to the things he’d done freely, if regretfully. But that had been the old Richard. Before he’d grabbed at the chance of redemption Carolyn Fry’s death had provided.
“Take my word. He’s a different man. A man very worthy of our love. And a man who shouldn't be handed over to any merc or prison. As far as I’m concerned, he’s paid his dues. Before you get too horrified about who you’ve been living with, remember how he’s saved your life a number of times. How the very attributes that have you cringing in terror, also made him the man that let him protect all of us from Leffner. And the other pieces of shit that have tried to hurt us! You know as well as I do, kid, that the galaxy is not a very nice place.
He loves you! And me. And even Hill. That’s why he stayed. He could’ve left after dumping you and Imam off here. Instead he’s tried to make a life here with us. A life he never thought he’d have. His childhood sucked in a big way. The time he’s had with us is the only time in his life he’s ever been loved.”
Tears welled up in Zar’s eyes as she looked beseechingly into Audrey’s increasingly softening face. “I can’t let him go back to Slam, Audrey. He’d rather be dead than have this taste of freedom, and happiness, then be thrown back into that Hell hole. They’ll torture him, use him, have him turn back into the killer they created, then dispose of him like he was a rotten piece of garbage when he’s no longer useful.”
Watching Zar’s face, Audrey could not deny the love the older woman had for Richard. If someone like Zar loved him, he couldn’t be the monster the galaxy had been led to believe.
Besides, Zar was right, Richard had been the best thing ever in Audrey’s life. She never remembered feeling so loved and safe as she had in this place. Part of that was due to Zar. But the majority of it had to be credited to Richard. Motherly love and support meant a lot. But in Audrey’s world, the ability to be protected meant even more. The logical part of her brain couldn’t reconcile the psychopathic killer with the loving, if brooding, man who’d been there for her all this time. One of the images was wrong.
Her gut told the killer reflection was not the legitimate Richard.
“Okay. So what do we do? Is he still on Polaris?”
Zar smiled at the girl’s acceptance of her defense of Richard. She never ceased to stop amazing her.
“Yeah, he’s still here. I’ve grounded Miriam’s ship. She’ll have to go through a mountain of red tape before they let her off the station.
And ‘we’ aren’t doing anything. I am. You and Hill are going to get out of harms way. I’m sending you to New Mecca to Imam. The two of you will be safe there with him. I know you don’t remember him, but take my word for it. He’s a really good guy.”
Raising her hand to forestall Audrey’s coming verbal outrage Zar said, “Audrey...Jack...I don’t know if I can save him. And even if I do, we can’t stay here. I NEED to know that you and the baby are safe. I can’t do what I have to do and still be worried about you. We have to create a whole new life. Away from here. Please...please, understand. And forgive me for doing this to you. But I can’t lose you or Hill like I did Beth.”
Audrey swallowed hard at the desperately pleading look on Zar’s face. She realized Zar thought she was probably not going to be able to save Richard. In fact, she’d probably die in the attempt.
Looking around at the dining area she saw ghosts of the past year. The family meals, the petty arguments every cohabiting group had. The times she had walked in on Richard passionately kissing Zar. The love between the two filling the room up with it’s own glow. Falling softly on everyone within it’s reach.
She remembered the day she had brought Toni and Hill home. Knowing the big man with the cold face would stand between them and the evil that was their life. Now that man was at the mercy of a merc due to him extending his protection to them. Surely to be thrown back into a pit of torture and despair that would break him. Kill him.
She remembered the tears and grief of a heart broken woman realizing the man she loved had betrayed their commitment to each other. And still went on loving him. Enough so that she would rip apart everything she held dear to try and save him from a past that had finally caught up with him.
Zar had provided her with a home, a family, a safe haven unlike any she had ever known. Audrey guessed it was her growing older that made her able to understand what Zar had to do. Not that she liked being dumped on a stranger. But she just didn’t have the heart to make it even harder on her.
She knew she would be more of a hindrance than help in Zar’s rescue attempt. And even after learning his true identity, she desperately wanted Richard safe.
Choking back tears she went to Zar. Hugging her fiercely, she felt Zar’s anguish and dread as she hugged her back. “Do whatever you need to do. Hill and I will be fine with Imam. But promise me, if you two do manage to make it out, that you’ll come find us someday. When it’s safe enough.”
“Yes, I promise! I know this is so unfair Audrey! You and Hill don’t deserve this. But there’s no one else to help.”
Disengaging herself from the embrace, Zar wiped softly at the teenager’s wet face. “Go pack some things for you and Hill. I have some credits for you to travel with. And to help Imam support the two of you.”
Zar smiled slightly, “When I talked to him, told him what was going on, then told him I was sending you and a baby to him, he didn’t blink an eye. I’ve met a lot of so called ‘holy’ people. They’re usually hypocrites and petty hearted liars. But he’s the real thing Audrey. And do me a favor, take it easy on him. Try not to get in trouble for at least a little while. Okay?”
Smiling back, Audrey bent her forehead to rest lightly on Zar’s. Jeeesh, when had she grown taller than the older woman? Audrey had always thought she only looked that way next to Richard’s massiveness. But for all her plumpness, Zar really was a tiny woman.
Apprehension made Audrey shiver as the enormity of what Zar was going to attempt finally got through her grief stricken brain. How could this one, untrained, diminutive person expect to take on the ASF and a merc?!
Her voice wobbling, she begged Zar, “I promise to try and stay out of trouble. But Zar...be careful! Please!”
“I promise to try also. But...Audrey...don’t expect...I mean...” She had to take a couple of deep breaths to steady herself. “Hell, let’s get this show on the road. I don’t have a lot of time.”
Audrey sped back to her room. Soon the sound of drawers opening and closing filtered out into the dining area.
In the meantime, Zar searched out for the hiding places where Richard had kept some weapons. She had hated the fact there were firearms in the apartment with the kids. It had caused a week’s worth of tears and fighting, begging him to get rid of the weapons. But he’d been unmovable. History teaching him the risks to the children being far less that the risk of being unprepared. Zar had violently disagreed. Visions of curious faces and reaching hands finding the dangerous weapons.
But she’d been with him long enough to realize he would not budge on this issue and for peace’s sake had let it drop. On one condition. That only the two of them would know about it. He’d agreed.
Gingerly lifting the pulse pistol from it’s resting place behind the headboard, she made a note to tell him he’d been right. But she still didn’t believe in weapons and kids being in the same home.
Ten minutes later she met Audrey and the crying Hill in the dining area. The baby obviously felt the anxiety and sorrow pervading the hurried evacuation of the apartment.
Zar took him from Audrey and rocked him gently. Not letting herself contemplate the fact that she probably would never hold him again. Kissing his smooth head she handed him back to Audrey.
“Take care of him. And yourself. Always remember that Richard loves you, I love you. No matter what. We’ll always be with you in memory if not in body.”
Gulping past the tears lodged in her throat, Audrey replied, “I will. I promise, I won’t forget. And I won’t let Hill forget either. Thank you Zar, for everything. And I love you too. Tell Richard that I love him. And I refuse to believe that we’ll never see each other again. I KNOW it won’t end that way!”
Impulsively Audrey hugged Zar, still holding the baby. The feeling of loss was almost overpowering.
“Let’s go sweetie.”
Abruptly Zar turned away so that the girl would not see her growing certainty that it would be less of a rescue mission and more of a mercy killing / suicide. She doubted Miriam was a sloppy merc. She wouldn’t be alive if she was. The chances of getting Richard out were slim to none.
So that meant the only thing Zar could hope for was to keep Richard from ever reaching Slam. Killing him here, mercifully, would be what he would want over going back to that place. The merc would probably take her life in payment. She didn’t want to even contemplate the chance of being captured, tried and jailed. Zar had stared Death in the face three other times. It held little fear for her. But how she and Richard died could at least be in her control.
They’d go out together.