Page 3

At the villa.
Cloud: Tifa, I know you have feelings for me, but how come you don’t go for um.... someone single like.......... Barret?
Tifa: Barret?!
Cloud: Fine. Errr... how about Cid?
Tifa: He has Shera, besides he smokes too much, ew.
Cloud: Cait Sith?
Tifa: What?! How could I go out with a freaking robot, huh?!
Cloud: Ne, how about Vincent?
Tifa: He’s a cold man, but very handsome.
Aeris appears.
Aeris: Hey, Tiff? I heard you guys talking. I’ll set ya up with Vince!
Tifa: I don’t know. Him and Yuffie are sorta close.
Aeris: Nah. Come on it’ll be fun!
Cloud: Let’s go! *whisper* Do you think it will work Aeris? Aeris: Maybe.
Aeris, Tifa, and Cloud run into the ‘group’.
Aeris: Do you know where Vincent is?
Cid: Last I saw he was going with Yuff to her room.
Cloud: Really?!
Aeris and you get the idea... go to Yuffie’s room.
Barret: I wonder what dere doing in there?
Yuffie: Ooh! Don’t be so hard on me!
Aeris: Uhhh......
Everyone looks at the door.
Vincent: Yuffie, you know how I am. It’s not like we haven’t done this before.
Tifa leans into the door to listen better.
Cloud: Interesting.
Yuffie: Wow! Mm! You’re really good at this!
Vincent: ......... Are we finished now?
Yuffie: I’ll get better if I practice.
Cid: Those things I didn’t need to know.
Barret: I’m glad Marlene isn’t with us.
Yuffie gets up and shuts off the PS2 and takes out Tekken Tag Tournament that is in her room. The door opens and smacks Tifa in the face.
Tifa: Ow! My nose!
Aeris: Oh! That’s gotta hurt! Teehee!
Tifa: I knew this was a bad idea.
Cloud: What were you guys doin’ in there? Hmm?
Yuffie: Playing Tekken.
Cid: Sure.
Vincent: We were.
Yuffie: You pervs! It’s not what you think!
Barret: Then why is Valentine blushing foo’!
Vincent: ........ I am not.
Yuffie: Were you listening in?!
Cid: #$@%^! SO ya finally knocked her up!
Cloud: Way to go man!
Tifa: Men.
Vincent slaps his forehead.
Yuffie: Arrg! Let’s go Vinnie!
Yuffie takes Vincent’s hand and they leave.
Tifa: Well, there goes my date.
Aeris: Heehee. Wow never thought they’d end up together!
Cid: %$#&*^......... weird couple.
Barret: I knew somethin’ was fishy about them two foos’.
Tifa sits up.
Tifa: Hey, where did the author go?
Cid: Hey, she was suppose to get my #@$% mentose!
Barret: Didn’t she jes leave wit dat foo’ Sephiroth?
Aeris: ......................
Tifa: Sephiroth?
Cloud: Huh? Sephiroth? Where? I’ll get em’!
Tifa: Didn’t we say that?
Sephiroth and Dagger appear.
Sephiroth: Eh.... you rang?
Cloud: You son of Jenova! You’re gonna die! Let’s go now!
Cloud charges Sephiroth with his Buster Sword.
Dagger: Ack! No!
Dagger steps in front of Sephiroth.
Dagger: Ouchie wouchie!
Dagger falls over.
Aeris: Oh, no!
Cid: $#%^&@! Now who’s gonna write the story!
Barret: Cloud ya foo’!
Tifa: Crappers!
Kidd: Bugger!
Glenn: How terrible!
Lady Amber: Oh, dear!
Ally: Moi thinks that hurts!
Karsh: D@mnit all!
Dagger: Will you all shut up!
Cloud: But we were on a role!
Dagger: Chrono people get out! Out! Out!
All: ........
The ‘chrono’ people disappear.
Dagger: ......... hello?!
Aeris: Teehee! Hello!
The wind blows.........
All the cast looks at scripts.
Sephiroth: Oh, yeah..... Great you killed Dagger!
All: Dagger?
Dagger stabs Cloud in the with her (duh dagger).
Cloud: Ack!
Dagger: B@ST@RD!
Aeris summons Great Gospel.
Cloud: Why didn’t I think of that when Aeris died?
Dagger: Cause you’re an idiot.
Tifa: Good enough reason for me.
Cloud: I am not!
Sephiroth: Hey, shall me get some Smeredoff Ice now?
Dagger: Oh yeah! Hey, Cid why don’tcha come with.
Cid: Hell ya! Hey did ya ever get my @#%^ mentose?
Dagger: Err...... no. We umm.... got side tracked, yeah that’s it!
Cid: ............. whatever.
Barret: Hey, yer jes pulled a Squall!
Cid: ya $hit that’s my line!
Dagger: Come on Cid! We gotta hurry cause we’re meeting Reno there.
Cid: Carrot top?!
Aeris: Heehee! Be back by 12 and no killing!
Tifa: That’s right violence leads to more violence.
Cait Sith and Red XIII appear outta nowhere
Cait Sith: I hear ya sis tah!
Red XIII: Sure.
Sephiroth: Sure.
Dagger: Right.
Cid: Let’s @$@%@#% leave!
Sephiroth and you get the idea again leave.
Tifa: Man it’s a Friday night and I have nothing to do!
Aeris: It’s not fair!
Cloud: Me sleepy boy.
Aeris: What time is it?
Tifa: Err.... around 9:30PM!
Aeris: Drat, it’s time for Cloud’s bed time story!
Cait Sith: Let’s get some booze! We can pass as adults, right?
Red XIII: Sure.
Cait Sith: Quit saying that!
Red XIII: Sure.
Cait Sith: ARRRR!
Cait Sith and Red XIII leave.

***********************************************

At the bar.........

Reno: *hic* Hey, there honey...... !
Dagger: Reno don’t make me hurt you.
Reno: Ooh! You’re a feisty one!
Sephiroth: Well, he’s drunk.
Cid: No @#$% $hit sherlock!
Dagger: That’s a corny line old man.
Cid: #@$%^&!
Reno: *is passed out*
Sephiroth: Shall I get us a drink Cid?
Dagger: Hey what about me!
Cid: Not legal age kid.
Dagger: *pouts* I’m close enough! Please.
Cid: Yer right about age, hey yer only 17! Ah, oh well. Alright!
Dagger: Yeah!
Reno: UUh... mom?
Dagger: No not quite, just go back to sleep.
Reno: K......... zzzzzzzzzzzzzz zzzzzzzzzz

******************************************************
Cloud: Tell me story now!
Tifa: Be patient.
Aeris: Hey, where did Barret go?
Tifa: Last I knew he went to the bathroom.
Aeris: Oh, ok.
Cloud: Hello?!
Aeris: Hello! Teehee!
Tifa: Alright, Cloud chill your beans.
Aeris: Once upon a time...........

THE END

Meanwhile in the bathroom..........
Barret: #@$%^&*! My friggin’ foot is stuck! D@mn small toilet!

THE END AGAIN

Disclaimer: Ne, I don’t own any characters, well besides Dagger cause she is umm me. Yeah well any ways Squaresoft owns all characters except Dagger, I guess you could say I own myself! :)

[Layout (c) Abigail of Breeze Graphics]