Long Lost

 

© Sweet-Kisses™

 

~*~

 

Nick was sitting up in his bed, supported by a mountain of comfortable white pillows and wrapped in white sheets. He looked confused. He was confused. The people that had been introduced to him as his long-time friends, minus that Kevin guy who really made him feel sick, were trying to explain to him the person he was and the job he did before he got hurt. He didn’t understand why he couldn’t remember anything. And he got frustrated, because every time he was asked if he remembered this or that, all he could say was no. He didn’t remember anything. Then they tried to cheer him up by saying that it would all just hit him over the head one day. It would just take a little time and patience.

 

He was starting to think of himself as a nuisance, a pain and wondered why these guys even bothered trying to help him. It was no use, really. He’d never remember anything. It was just too hard. But he liked them. They put him at ease and seemed the best of friends. They laughed, joked and teased each other but despite all of that, Nick could see a real connection between them all. Nick felt a pang of jealously. He wished he could remember having that with them, because he was told that he did. For almost a decade, in fact. Seemed like such a long time and such a lot of history that they would obviously have between them. He wished to God that he could recall at least one small memory, to show them that he wasn’t a lost cause.

 

But he couldn’t.

 

“So you’re saying...I’m a millionaire?” Nick asked uncertainly.

 

A.J. nodded quickly. “Yup, that’s what we’re saying. Millions of girls around the world love you. You should feel proud of that. You’re famous!”

 

“Famous,” Nick repeated uncertainly.

 

“Meaning, you can’t go anywhere without being recognized, mobbed by people or both,“ Howie explained. “But it’s all part of the job. And as A.J. pointed out, it’s made you a very rich man. A millionaire.” 

 

Nick’s blue eyes were wide. A millionaire! “Wow,” he breathed. “And...what is it I do again? Or we do? Or...what?”

 

“We’re a group, Nick,” Brian replied gently. “A vocal harmony group, though some people refer to us as a ‘boy band’. But don’t listen to that, it’s just bitter critics having their fifteen seconds. People like us for the way we sound, Nick. We make people happy through our songs.”

 

Nick frowned. “A vocal harmony group?” He shook his head. “I don’t understand.”

 

Howie experienced a brief wave of sadness wash over him. It was clear that Nick was struggling to remember everything and to understand what they were saying to him. Matter of fact, he felt like crying. The look on Nick’s face was enough to make any heart break. “We’re a group of five guys and our success is based on how well we sing together. And may I add that we sound pretty damn good.”

 

“Modest as always,” Brian quipped.

 

Howie laughed. “But seriously. When we sing together, it’s normally divided into a five-part harmony. Which means everyone is singing different notes based on our individual vocal ability, but combine all of them together and you’ve got a hell of a song. And we can do that. Most groups can’t pull it off as well.”

 

“And we do?” Nick asked.

 

“Hell yeah, we do,” A.J. replied strongly.

 

Nick nodded slowly, digesting all of the information. “So, which part or parts do I sing?”

 

“Normally, you take the higher notes,” Brian said. “Tell you what. Start singing. I mean it, don’t look afraid. Start singing, anything you want, or just sing a note like this...” He demonstrated for a few seconds. “And you’ll hear your gift.”

 

“Ohh-kaaay,” Nick said hesitantly.

 

He paused for a few seconds, silently psyching himself so he wouldn’t look like a fool. He then opened his mouth and mimicked the note that Brian had sung. Instantly his eyes widened when he heard himself singing. A second later, the three sitting around his bed joined in, giving him an example of what they were trying to explain. He stopped and covered his mouth while they continued to sing. He sat there, watching and listening in awe.

 

A.J. smiled. “Pretty good, huh?”

 

“Oh...my...God,” Nick whispered, his heart racing. “That was incredible!”

 

“But we need Kevin here to bring the whole thing together,” Brian explained, his eyes twinkling. “Doesn’t sound nearly as good without him. When we all sing together, Kevin included, you’ll understand what I mean.”

 

Nick’s eyes instantly narrowed at the mention of Kevin. “Kevin? What does he have to do with it?”

 

While Brian and Howie exchanged uncertain glances, A.J. quickly replied, “He’s the one with the magic voice. Some say that without him as the baritone, we wouldn’t sound as good as we do. I guess there’s some truth in that. But I think that I do a good job, too.”

 

“We all do a good job,” Howie corrected. “Nobody in this group thinks that Kevin does a better job than you or anyone else. Okay?”

 

“Well, whatever,” Nick said, crossing his arms over his chest. “Just keep him away from me.”

 

“Nick,” Brian began, choosing his words carefully, “I’m not sure if you understand what went on between you and Kevin. But let me say that the two of you were – “

 

The door to Nick’s room suddenly opened and Kevin walked in. He looked tired, like he hadn’t slept in a long time. He became aware of the fact that as soon as he walked in the room, Nick’s eyes turned cold and looked away. It was like a dagger went through Kevin’s heart, and it hurt. It hurt a lot. Nobody would understand how much it hurt him, when they had spent so much time in love with each other, and then suddenly Nick couldn’t stand him.

 

He felt like dying. After everyone, except Nick, had greeted him, Kevin silently took a seat and stared directly at Nick. But Nick refused to look at him. Kevin couldn’t quite comprehend the sudden change in Nick. It was as though Nick was another person. Kevin wanted to murder the people that had hurt him, for making him the way he was. 

 

“How are you feeling, Nick?” Kevin asked softly.

 

Nick wished that this guy would just leave him alone. Did he not get the message? Did he not understand the looks that Nick was giving that clearly said ‘I can’t stand you?’ What the hell was wrong with him? He finally turned his eyes on Kevin and they were like blue ice. And he knew Kevin understood what his eyes were silently saying, Kevin’s own eyes widened from the look.

 

“Actually, I’m really tired. I need to sleep. Doctor’s orders.”

 

“But – “ Kevin began.

 

A.J. stood up and placed a hand on Kevin’s shoulder. “If he’s tired, he needs to rest.”

 

Kevin sighed in response. He had no choice but to leave.

 

~**~

 

Kevin sat on a deck chair beside the pool, the house behind him that used to belong to him and Nick, but was now occupied by him alone. It was so quiet there, too quiet for his own liking. Normally, when they were both there together, Nick always created enough noise for him to handle through a variety of different ways. Music, himself singing loudly, splashing around in the pool, laughing hysterically. It was all noise when Nick was around, but Kevin was used to it and now realized how much he missed it. It made him sad. He missed Nick’s voice and his laughter, and him just being there. Sure, when Kevin was alone he appreciated the time by himself but he was always comforted by the thought that Nick would return.

 

But now it seemed as though Nick wasn’t returning, and maybe never even would. His friends tried to convince him otherwise, but Kevin didn’t believe them. Not after the way Nick had been treating him all of a sudden, like he couldn’t stand the sight of him. And the ironic thing was that once, a long time ago, Nick had convinced him otherwise...

 

Nick’s cheeks were flushed and his blonde hair was spiked in every different direction imaginable when he laid down next to Kevin, throwing his arms across Kevin’s body. “I love you. And you know what? I think I could love you for the rest of my life.”

 

“Really?” Kevin asked, taking hold of Nick’s hands and kissing the tips of his fingers delicately. “Forever and ever and ever?”

 

“Oh…well…at least until one of us is dead.”

 

“Gee, what a nice thought,” Kevin said dryly. A serious expression appeared on his face and he turned on his side, resting his elbow on the bed and his hand on the side of his head, staring down at Nick. “But...what would happen to us if something changed all that? What if you didn’t love me all of a sudden, what if something happened and you hated me?”

 

Nick narrowed his eyes. “Is this your way of telling me you’re cheating on me?”

 

“No,” Kevin chuckled. “But if something did happen and you hated me, for some reason or another, what would happen to us?”

 

“Oh, shut up,” Nick replied, hooking his arm through Kevin’s so that Kevin’s head hit the pillow. He sat up and looked directly into his partner’s eyes. “Listen to me, Kevin Scott Richardson, because this is the only time I’m going to say this.” He paused for a second, and then he giggled. “Or maybe not. But...nothing, and I mean nothing, is going to stop me from loving you. Nothing.”

 

Kevin felt tears forming in his eyes, and then a hand on his shoulder. He looked up quickly. It was Howie. “Oh. Hey.”

 

“Not the nicest greeting I’ve had all day,” Howie commented with a wry smile and took a seat. Almost instantly he was aware of the cigarette between Kevin’s fingers. “I thought you quit.”

 

Kevin cast his friend a defiant look. “I have been known to do so in times of stress,” he explained. “I only quit because Nick hated it. And...well...from the way he’s acting right now, I hardly think he’ll give a shit. Matter of fact, I’m guessing if he found out, he’d be wishing I’d develop lung cancer and die early.”

 

“Well, lung cancer or not, it’s still a disgusting habit,” Howie said, snatching the cigarette away and stubbing it out with his foot.

 

“You’d be amazed to find out some of my other disgusting habits,” Kevin said. “And what right do you have to tell me what to do in my own home?”

 

Howie shook his head. “Kevin, don’t be stupid. And please, don’t take your anger out on me. I haven’t done anything to you. I’m here to talk to you, to be a friend. That’s all. What you do or do not do is your own business. I’d rather not know.”

 

Kevin stared off into the distance for several moments, gathering his thoughts and trying to hold back the tears. Howie conveniently looked away while Kevin tried to compose himself, but finally he just let all his feelings loose. “What the hell is wrong with him?” he cried tearfully, tears spilling down his cheeks. “Why can’t he stand me? What have I done wrong? What am I doing wrong? I never should’ve left him alone that night! I knew I should never have left without him, I knew it!”

 

“Kevin,” Howie said gently, trying his greatest to comfort his best friend, “nobody blames you for what happened. It could’ve happened anywhere, at any time to anyone. Don’t blame yourself, Kevin, please. It’s unnecessary.”

 

Kevin sniffed and wiped away his tears. “I just don’t understand. How could we, in such a short amount of time, go from two people who love each other to...to...”

 

“You don’t have to explain,” Howie told him. “There’s no need. Nick’s just very unsure of himself right now and he’s finding it difficult to adjust to what he’s going through and the things people are telling him about his life. Imagine if you were in his place, Kevin. How would you feel?”

 

“Pretty horrible, I guess.”

 

“Exactly,” Howie said triumphantly. “Just give him time. He’ll be the same Nick that we always knew. You’ll see, Kevin.”

 

“It’s just...” Kevin leaned forward in his chair and placed his head in his hands in despair. “I’ve gone through so much with him since we’ve been together, and I can’t help remembering little things like our first kiss, the first time he said he loved me, the first time we – “

 

“Okay, okay, need not more information,” Howie said, holding up a hand. “I get the point."

 

For the first time since his friend arrived, Kevin had a genuine smile on his face. “You know, he can be such a kid sometimes. But then, he can just really amaze you by saying something so...I don’t know, remarkable, that you just think...is that the same Nick in there? But I love that.” His eyes then clouded over. “Or used to love that.”

 

“And you will, again,” Howie replied confidently, trying in vain to boost his friend’s spirit. “Just give it time. Be patient with him. When he’s released from hospital, spend time with him. Show him old photos of the two of you, take him places where you both have been together, help him remember. It could really do some good. Help him get to know the person he fell in love with.”

 

“Oh, great plan,” Kevin snapped. “How the hell am I going to manage that when he can’t even stand being in the same room as me? How the hell can I do that when he’s acting the way he is? Huh?” 

 

Howie sat back in his chair, clearly stung. “I was just trying to help,” he said softly.

 

“Sorry, I’m just someone who’s lost his soul mate,” Kevin murmured.

 

“It’s okay. I understand.”

 

Kevin shook his head. “You know, it’s funny. We’ve spent so much time trying to fight things that would stop us from being together that I never realized that one day we’d be fighting each other.” He clenched his jaw. “And I hate it. I really hate it.” He turned to face his friend, his eyes filling with tears again, the expression on his face showing complete and utter helplessness. “It’s killing me!”

 

Howie felt a deep pang of sympathy for his friend. “I know you’ll get through this, I know Nick will see you for what you are and that he’ll remember how much he loved you. And I’ll tell you why. A.J., Brian and I saw that every day. We saw how much the two of you were in love, no matter how much you two tried to hide it. He’ll come back to you, Kevin. I know he will.”

 

“How do you know he will?”

 

“Where else is he going to go? Who else is going to love him like that?”

 

A small, sad smile appeared on Kevin’s face. “You know, buddy, I’ve always said that you were a dreamer. And now you just proved it.”

 

~***~