Too Drunk To Fuck

Went to a party
I danced all night
I drank 16 beers
And I started up a fight

But now I'm jaded
You're out of luck
I'm rolling down the stairs
Too drunk to fuck

Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk
To fuck
I'm too drunk, too drunk, too drunk
To fuck

I like your stories
I like your gun
Shooting out cop tires
Sounds like loads and loads of fun

But in my room
Wish you were dead
You ball like the baby
In Eraserhead

Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk
To fuck
It's all I need right now
Too drunk to fuck

Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk to fuck
Too drunk
To fuck
I'm sick soft gooey and cold
Too drunk to fuck

I'm about to drop
My head's a mess
The only salvation is
I'll never see you again

You give me head
It makes it worse
Take out your fuckin' retainer
Put it in your purse

Too drunk to fuck
You're too drunk to fuck
Too drunk
To fuck
It's all I need right now Oh baby
I'm melting like an ice cream bar
Oh baby

And now I got diarrhea
Too drunk to fuck
Yeah, Yeah
Yeah, Yeah
Yeah, Yeah
Oooohhh...


The Prey

You're from out of town
I can tell that by your shoes
Flew in for the convention
Getting tipsy in a bar

You're leaving pretty late
Gotta get up in the morning
Thinking she's just too expensive
And you know you're...
Probably...
Right

There's no one on the streets
And you can't find your hotel
You walk a little faster
- someone's following you

The wallet-size bulge
In you double-knit butt
Has money for me
And maybe credit cards

You dart around the next corner
You can't look around
Quick now, fish for the keys for the door
You don't even know where you are

You walk a little faster
I walk a little faster
Sensing that I sense you
Now there's no escape

I can almost taste your dandruff
As I reach out for your face
- and I strike!