This is the page that's slightly less than filled with things only certain people understand. Don't get too comfy.

Does anyone know what a zaffer is? Anyone? Anyone? Yes, it's a word. I'd look it up but I don't feel like it. If you really wanna know, don't ask Lacie. She'll probably tell you this: When a bug runs into a blue light thing and says "Son of a zaff!" I think it makes sense.

This is a true story. Once upon a time, Katie, Maddie, and Beth were sitting around on a hot summer evening. All of a sudden, out of nowhere came this hideous bug that must have been five inches long that looked like an oversized mutated wasp. Being the first to notice the bug, Maddie said, "What the heck kind of bug is that?" Beth and Katie looked at the bug in horror as it just crawled around. None of the three had ever seen such a monstrosoty of an insect. Then they had an idea. What if it was a rare species and worth all kinds of money and stuff? So they killed it and took it home to Maddie's mom who knows someone who knows a lot about bugs. Fearing the bug would come back to life, (hey, you should've seen the thing. You'd have been scared too.) they enclosed it in a small box and taped it to heck. The sinister insect was left on Maddie's back porch for the next few days. Finally, the news came. Was the bug, in fact, a rare specimen that would bring fame and fortune and made-for-tv movies? Well, it wasn't. As it turns out, the bug was actually a good bug that eats the bad ones. I guess you really shouldn't judge a bug by its cover, because that thing looked like death.

Ode to Coffee

This poem is dedicated to Kristen, Katie, and all the other people who accuse others of not liking coffee.

I sleep only to wake up for you.
My endearment for you grows stronger with each morning that I have dedicated to you.
I hear you call my name with your harmonius stir.
Your sweet ebony liquid is my only yearning.
I consolidate you with only choice sweeteners. (oh evil Nutra Sweet)
Oh, marvelous coffee, though you scald my tastebuds, I find you yet irresistible.
So often I confide in you, and you solace my sorrow to elation (and hyperactivity).
Where would I be? Would my life be the same had you not been here?
I think not of the "what-if's" but of the "are's", for it is infeasible to think or imagine life without you.
Oh, the ads are not bogus: "The best part of waking up is Foldger's in your cup."
Hey! For more poems and cool stuff, check out Anonymity online today!

Here's a cool idea that let's you make fun of your school in a kind of secluded way. Write a note that says stuff like, "Ha ha! I bet you thought there was something really interesting in this note about someone else. I guess your nosiness got the better of ya. heh heh... etc etc etc..." Then fold it up and on the outside write something like, "To Johnny ONLY." Drop it in the hall or leave it in a classroom. That oughtta teach em.

Back to Beth's Bunk

There's no place like HOME for the holidays.