AN ACTUAL CYBER SEX TRANSCRIPT...with a difference
>Wellhung: Hello, Sweetheart. What do you look like? > >Sweetheart: I am wearing an expensive red silk blouse, a black >leather mini skirt and high heeled boots. I am tan and very buffed. I >workout everyday. My measurements are 36-24-36. What do you look like? > >Wellhung: I'm 6'3" and about 250 lb. I wear glasses and have >on a pair of blue sweatpants I just bought at Walmart. I'm also >wearing an old T-shirt, it's got some barbecue sauce stains on it and it >smells kind of funny. > >Sweetheart: I want you. Would you like to screw me? > >Wellhung: OK > >Sweetheart: We're in my bedroom. There's soft music playing on >the stereo and candles on my nightstand. I look up into your eyes >and I'm smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and I begin to >feel your huge swelling bulge. > >Wellhung: I'm gulping. I'm beginning to sweat. > >Sweetheart: I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest. > >Wellhung: Now, I'm unbuttoning your blouse. My hands are >trembling. > >Sweetheart: I'm moaning softly. > >Wellhung: I'm taking hold of your blouse and I'm sliding it >softly off. > >Sweetheart: I'm throwing my head back in pleasure. The cool >silk slides off of my warm body. I'm rubbing your bulge faster now, >rubbing and pulling. > >Wellhung: My hand suddenly jerks spastically and tears a hole in >your blouse. I'm sorry. > >Sweetheart: That's, OK. It wasn't really too expensive. > >Wellhung: I'll pay for it. > >Sweetheart: Don't worry about it! I'm wearing a lacy black bra, >my soft breasts are rising and falling as I breathe harder and harder. > >Wellhung: I'm fumbling with the clasp of your bra, I think it's >stuck. Do you have scissors? > >Sweetheart: I take your hand and kiss it softly, I reach behind >my back and undo the clasp. My bra slides off. The cool air caresses my >breasts, my nipples are erect for you. > >Wellhung: How did you do that? I'm picking up the bra and >inspecting the clasp. > >Sweetheart: I'm arching my back. Oh baby, I just want to feel >your tongue all over me. > >Wellhung: I'm dropping the bra. Now I'm licking your, you know, >breasts. They're neat! > >Sweetheart: I'm running my fingers through your hair. Now I'm >nibbling your ear. > >Wellhung: I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are covered with spit >and phlegm. > >Sweetheart: WHAT? > >Wellhung: I'm so sorry. Really. > >Sweetheart: I'm wiping your phlegm off of my breasts with the >remains of my blouse. > >Wellhung: I'm taking your sopping wet blouse from you and >throwing it in the corner of the room. > >Sweetheart: OK. I'm pulling your sweatpants down and rubbing >your hard tool. > >Wellhung: I'm screaming like a woman! Your hands are cold! Yeee! > >Sweetheart: I'm pulling up my miniskirt. Take off my panties. > >Wellhung: I'm pulling off your panties. My tongue is going all >over, in and out and nibbling on you. ummm, wait a second. > >Sweetheart: What's the matter? > >Wellhung: I've got a pubic hair caught in my throat. I'm >choking. > >Sweetheart: Are you OK? > >Wellhung: I'm having a coughing fit. I'm turning all red. > >Sweetheart: Is there anything I can do to help? > >Wellhung: I'm running to the kitchen. Choking wildly. Looking >for a cup. Where do you keep your cups?? > >Sweetheart: In the cabinet to the right of the sink! > >Wellhung: I'm drinking a cup of water. There that's better. > >Sweetheart: Come back to me, lover. > >Wellhung: I'm washing the cup now. > >Sweetheart: I'm aching for you lover. > >Wellhung: Now I'm drying the cup. I'm putting it back in the >cabinet. And now I'm walking back to the bedroom. Wait it's dark, I'm >lost. Where is the bedroom? > >Sweetheart: Last door on the left at the end of the hall. > >Wellhung: I found it. > >Sweetheart: I'm tugging off your pants. I want you so badly. > >Wellhung: Me too. > >Sweetheart: I kiss you passionately. Our naked bodies pressed >against each other. > >Wellhung: Your face is pushing my glasses into my face. It >hurts. > >Sweetheart: Why don't you take your glasses off? > >Wellhung: OK. But I can't see very well. I'm placing my >glasses on the nightstand. > >Sweetheart: I'm bending over the bed. Give it to me baby! > >Wellhung: I have to pee. I'm fumbling my way blindly to the >bathroom > >Sweetheart: Hurry back lover. > >Wellhung: I find the bathroom and it's dark. I'm feeling around >for the toilet and lift the lid. > >Sweetheart: I'm waiting eagerly for your return. > >Wellhung: I'm done going. I'm feeling around for the flush >handle. Uh-oh! > >Sweetheart: What's the matter now? > >Wellhung: I just realised I peed in your hamper. Sorry again. >I'm walking back to the bed now. Blindly feeling my way. > >Sweetheart: Mmmm, yes. Come on. > >Wellhung: Now I'm going to put my, you know, thing in your umm, >woman's thing. > >Sweetheart: Yes! Do it, Baby! Do it! > >Wellhung: I'm touching your smooth butt. It feels so nice. >Ma'am, I'm having a little problem here. > >Sweetheart: I'm moving my ass back and forth. I can't wait >another second. Slide it in! Screw me! > >Wellhung: I'm flaccid. > >Sweetheart: WHAT? > >Wellhung: I'm limp. I can't sustain an erection. > >Sweetheart: I'm standing up and turning around; an incredulous >look on my face > >Wellhung: I'm shrugging with a sad look on my face, my weiner >all floppy. I'm looking for my glasses to see what the problem is. > >Sweetheart: NO! Never mind. I'm getting dressed, I'm putting on >my underwear and my wet nasty blouse. > >Wellhung: No wait. I can't find the night table. I'm reaching >across the dresser, knocking off cans of hairspray, your picture frames >and your candles. > >Sweetheart: I'm buttoning my blouse. I'm putting on my shoes. > >Wellhung: Now I've found my glasses. My God! One of your >candles fell on the curtain! The curtain is on fire. I'm pointing at it >with >a shocked look on my face. > >Sweetheart: Go to hell! I'm logging off, LOSER! > >Wellhung: Now the carpet is on fire! Nooooooo!