Harassing A Store

1. If the s is accessible to you, use a
 needle and poke holes in all of 
 them.
2. Take Ex-Lax and put it in the donuts, cookies,
 ice cream, coffee machine, 
 cashier's soda, etc.
 
 3. Take one bite out of each of the cookies and
 donuts.
 
 4. Mix all of the items in the condiments bar
 together to form a big, yucky 
 salad. Be sure to spill items all over each other
 and on the floor.
 
5. Use a razor blade to make a slit in each one of
 the cartons of milk. This 
 will start a very small drip-leak but when a
 customer picks up the milk it 
 should spill pretty good. This makes a good mess
 inside AND outside of the 
 cooler. Really a bitch to clean up.
 

6. Paint the front sidewalk in pychedelic colors.
 
7. Bring a ton of items up to the counter. After the
 cashier rings everything 
 up and asks for your $34.75, tell him you changed
 your mind and walk out, 
 leaving everything on the counter.
 
8. Most of the more popular stores have a toll-free
 customer hotline for 
 customers to call in and complain or make
 suggestions. Find this number 
 (usually written on the outside window) and call it
 once a day to complain 
 about an employee you don't like.
 
9. Put a full pot of coffee under the coffee spout.
 Then press the button that 
 starts the coffee maker. This will overflow the pot
 and create a tremendous 
 mess.
 
10.Jam the handle on the Slurpee/Slushie/Whatever
 machine so that the mush 
 keeps on flowing after you leave. Watch the cashier
 cry when he finds it.
 
11.Ask for $600 in money orders and twenty lotto
 tickets. After the cashier 
 prints up the money orders and lotto tickets, leave.
 It's a real bitch to void 
 out money orders and lotto.
 
12.Sit your fountain drink on top of a video game.
 There's usually some vents 
 on top of the game so whoops! Accidentally knock
 your drink over so the entire 
 44 ounces of Pepsi spill into these vents. This
 makes for some pretty neat-o 
 smoking effects as well as sparks and fire. Make
 sure that it's not a cool game 
 that you play often because you won't be playing it
 anymore.
 

13.Fill up a Super Tanker Gigantic drink cup with
 Pepsi. Take it all around the 
 store with you spilling it's contents all over the
 items on the shelves as you 
 go along. You can imagine what it'd be like to clean
 this up.
 
14.On a really hot day, get on the roof and turn off
 the air conditioning. If 
 possible, make sure that the air conditioners will
 never work again. Be 
 extremely quiet when walking around up there so
 mister cashier doesn't hear you.
 
15.Telephone the cashier and start asking him
 questions about robberies like: 
 * "Do you have one of those silent alarm buttons you
 could press if I were to 
 rob you?"
 
 * "Do the police in your neighborhood respond
 quickly when something bad 
 happens in your store?"
 
 * "How many times has your store been robbed? Was
 the robber caught?"
 
 * "Theoreticly speaking, if a professional robber
 such as myself were to come 
 in and rob you, what are the chances of me getting
 caught?"
 
 * "Do you carry a loaded gun behind the counter?"
 
 * "How much money is in your cash drawer right now?
 That's all? Uhhh, could you 
 please not drop anymore in the safe until I get
 there? I, uh, need to cash a 
 check, yeah, that's it."
 
 * "Are you afraid of death?"
 

16.Order a telephone calling card for the store and
 obtain the pin number. 
 Using the card, make tons of harrassing calls to the
 store until the card goes 
 dead. When they get their bill, they realize that
 they've been paying for their 
 own harrassment.
 
17.Find out the store manager's name or the store
 owner's name. From a pay 
 phone call your friends in Austraila and third
 number bill it to the store, 
 saying that you're the manager. The cashier will
 accept the charges when he 
 thinks it's the manager. 
 
18.Order call forwarding for the store. Ask the
 cashier if you can use the 
 phone and dial 72#-911 or *72-911. When 911 answers,
 tell them you got the 
 wrong number and hang up. Now go out to a pay phone
 and call the store and 
 you'll get 911. Make up some big story about how
 you're getting robbed and 
 they've thrown you in the cooler and taken customers
 hostage, etc. If 911 calls 
 back to verify this, they'll get their own office,
 911.
 
19.Start picking up items around the store and
 dropping them in the trash can