THE ENERGIZER BUNNY'S OBITUARY

Today the world was stunned by the news of the death of the Energizer Bunny. He was six years old. Best known as "Pinkie" to all his friends and relatives, the irritating pink bunny that kept going, and going, and going...

Authorities believe that the death occured at approximately 8:42 last evening. An emergency autopsy was performed early this morning. Chief Medical Examiner, Dura Cell, concluded that the cause of death was acute cardiac arrest induced by sexual over-stimulation. Appearantly, someone had put Mr.Bunny's batteries in backwards, and he kept coming, and coming, and coming...