WARNING The following may offend some viewers.
For the past thoughts, that are now outdated, go here



Well. I thought it was time I wrote another "warm and fuzzy". The last one is slightly old, and eventhough I haven't changed, I'm sure I can think of enough bullshit to keep you busy reading for a few minutes. Down the bottom of the page there are some links to pictures, so if you are dying to know what I look like, scroll down now, because I'm not putting a link to there.

Where to start... I guess I'll begin by saying that I am now 17, and in about 3-4 months, I will never have to return to school ever again. I get all excited just thinking about it- that is until I realise that nothing is going to change. I wont go out more than I do now, I wont try different activities, go to clubs, or anything that people seem to look forward to. The truth is that I am much more content to say home and sleep, than go out and get drunk and suffer with a hangover the next day. Call me strange, but reading a good Sci-fi/Fantasy novel appeals to me a lot more than staying out all night, posibly getting raped by some ugly drunk guy, or robbed, or bashed, or spending hours holding you friends while they vomit onto your shoes. Call me straight, but I don't smoke, or drink much, and well, I just couldn't be bothered with drugs. I usually spend my spare time either drawing, reading, listening to music, or doing something on the computer. It's very fun-packed, I know, but it's what I do. I'm too lazy to go for walks, or catch a bus into the city. Sometimes I wish I could motivate myself more.

Sometimes I think that I feel the happiest I have ever felt, and then the next day I'll mope around wishing that there was more to life than this.But I don't search for the meaning of life. I already know it. We are born to fuck, reproduce, then die, and that's about all there is. Anything good that happens is a bonus. Most people can't accept that, so they resort to religion and the like, to give themselves something to hope for- that somewhere, there is a place better than this- somewhere we go when we die. It would be nice, granted, but why not concentrate on accomplishing something. Maybe you could make a difference to your life, or someone elses. Save a whale, the rainforest or the world, if that's what will make you happy. Run a children's hospital, run a marathon or run away. Do what you want, but remember that there are a lot of other people out there, and even if they don't respect you, show them respect and surprise them. Surprise is often the best weapon. Respect your elders, no matter how many times you get fucked around with. Respect your parents, they made you, and even if that is the only thing they do right, love them for it. Nobody is perfect, but who are we to decide what someone is worth. Judge and be judged. Life is way to short to run around putting other people down for petty things. Just because someone is different, doesn't mean they 'suck'. Unless they are politicians. Give a politician a bar of soap, and they will tell you it's a singing frog, or a dancing rat, or the draft for the new gun control laws.

This world is a corrupt sewer. It stinks, it's infested with rats and flies and all sorts of unpleasant creatures, and it's full of SHIT. I hate it. But there is nothing I can do. I can't get a refund, I can't disappear to a much nicer world. This is the only one we have. So I, for one, have decided to stick with it. Why should I be able to choose whether or not I live or die, there are plenty of people who never had the opportunity to choose, they had their lives ripped from them, through no fault of their own. Life's not fair- so why not hold your head high, give Life the finger, and succeed- just to shove it up Life's arse?
Think about it.


Try any of the links below to see pics of my friends and family.

Pre-Formal 1999- I'm second from the left
Pre-Formal 1999- I'm at the front
Pre-Formal 1999- ME!!
Pre-Formal 1999- ME!!(again)
At school- being my usual charming self
Pre-Homebake 1998- I'm on the right
Before my Semi-formal 1998- I'm on the right
At my Semi-formal, with my partner
Two of my friends at the Semi-formal
Before my Semi-formal- with my partner again.
My friend Jodie- at the Semi-formal
Before my Semi- with my sister
A concert- guess who I saw live?
Milo -probably the most insane cat you'll ever meet
Milo -she's watching you
Punk Dad- my father, the best in the world
My Father
My Parents
Me, in uniform