You may remember a couple of weeks ago, I told you about my friends, Biron and Toby, who lost their long tresses in story #18 “The Sacrifice.” Well, they wanted to get even with the neighbors, Grant and Sam, who had tricked them into going bald. It took us a while, but with the help of several friends, we took revenge.
My pal Eric (see story#10) agreed to help us after hearing about Biron and Toby. A couple of months ago, Eric brought the newest member of his soccer team, Josh, to the shop for a buzz and ever since Josh had been coming back. Our scheme centered around Josh who agreed to go bald since most of the time he had me buzz his hair with a #1 any way. Since Grant and Sam did not know Josh this was perfect. We all thought that Biron and Toby should stay out of site until the last moment, otherwise Grant and Sam would catch on.
Casey came up with the idea of saying that Josh was a “special” athlete with certain “charitable needs” and we should help him out with a “fund raiser.” Biron and Toby made up invitations that would go to just Sam and Grant. Eric suggested that the “event” should be held in the team club house recreation room. Everyone would be given a raffle ticket when they entered and two lucky winners would be selected to receive a “special prize.” Besides Eric, Josh, Casey and myself, several of Eric’s teammates joined in the fun and some of my regular clients also came giving us a total of about twenty people. We told Grant and Sam to be at the clubhouse at 8pm. The rest of us were there well before that. All except Grant and Sam knew exactly what would happen.
At the appointed time Grant and Sam came to the clubhouse and were given two raffle tickets. They came around and greeted Casey and myself. We introduced them to Eric and Josh. Everyone put it on real thick about Josh being “special” and, so, Grant and Sam fell for it. Food and drinks and music helped the evening move along quickly. Eric and his pals had set up a little dais at one end of the rec room and set up a curtain in front of it. We all hinted to Grant and Sam that the raffle “prize” was behind the curtain. What was behind the curtain? An impromptu barber shop was set up with a chair, mirrors a pole and Biron and Toby waiting with hair-hungry clippers.
Eric got up on the little dais just in front of the curtain at 9pm and announced it was time to announce the two winners of the “raffle.” Everyone cheered. Josh brought a punch bowl with raffle ticket stubs in it to the dais. Eric drew two numbers out of the punch bowl. Can you guess who won? Grant and Sam were both delighted and gave everyone very smug looks as they went to the dais. As they went to the dais everyone crowded around and created a human barrier around the front of the dais. A couple of Eric’s teammates stood on either end of the dais to block escape. The lights dimmed and the curtain was slowly drawn apart to reveal the barber shop and Biron and Toby.
Sam and Grant lost their smug smiles after Eric and Josh grabbed them from behind and herded them towards the “barber shop.” Even though both Grant and Sam worked out in a gym three times a week, neither Sam nor Grant could be considered big. Both are in their mid-twenties and around 5’9”, so Eric and Josh did not have too much trouble with them. Grant was pushed into the barber chair first whining that this couldn’t be happening. We all laughed. Then he was strapped in with ropes.
Grant had greyish-blue eyes and thick wavy brown hair that was neatly coiffed into a longish wedge-cut with thick, wide, earlobe-long sideburns. The wedge being 7” to 8” long and the under-cut being 1” to 2” long.
Toby started the fun. He tilted Grant’s head forward and clicked on the clippers. He ran the clippers up the middle of the back of Grant’s head and over the crown and across the top of his head. A mound of thick 7” to 8” brown hair landed in Grant’s lap. He moaned. Then, Toby repeated over and over moving the clippers from the nape of Grant’s neck forward over his crown to his forehead until the back and top of Grant’s head was prickly stubble. After each long, slow swipe of the clippers, Toby would rub his fingers over the new stubble and then through the hair he was about to buzz through.
Then Toby moved to Grant’s right side and slowly removed his long, wide and thick sideburn. Once the sideburn was gone, Toby continued to move the clippers up the side of Grant’s head to the top and then straight back. Going front to back, Toby removed what remained of Grant’s thick 7” to 8” wedge-wave and the rest of the hair on the right side of Grants head. Brown hair piled up on the cape and on the floor. Toby rubbed his hand across the newly buzzed side and said that he liked the wavy hair better. We all laughed. Toby moved around to Grant’s left side. He started just behind Grant’s left ear and ran the clippers around Grant’s ear to the front. A shower of brown hair fluttered down on the cape and floor.
Again and again back-to-front, Toby ran the clipper on the left side of Grant’s head building the mound of thick brown hair on the cape even further. Toby then removed Grant’s left sideburn starting at the earlobe and slowly buzzed up the side of Grant’s face. Then Toby ran the clippers all over Grant’s head “just to make sure.” He clicked off the clippers and got out the shaving lotion and straight razor. Toby lathered up Grant’s head and face and proceeded to remove all the prickly stubble that remained. After each swipe of the razor blade, Toby would rub his fingers over the area to make sure it was smooth enough. When Toby was finished, he rubbed a nasty smelling tonic all over Grant’s bald head and face. Grant was untied and got up to a round of cheers. He rubbed his hands over his head and gasped. He gasped again when he saw himself in the mirror. Grant was lead off the dais where everyone wanted to rub his bald head.
Biron laughed as Sam was pushed into the chair and strapped down. Sam has bright green eyes and had thick curly red hair that was about 3” all over with bushy, wide lamb chop sideburns. Biron tilted Sam’s head forward and clicked the clippers on and ran the clippers across the top of Sam’s head to his crown creating a path of stubble in between a mound of thick red curls on either side. Red curls showered the cape and everyone around laughed. Front-to-back, slowly and methodically mowing down 3” thick red curls down to prickly stubble until the top of Sam’s head was nothing but stubble and the cape was piled high with bright red 3” curls. Biron stopped for a moment to rub his hand back and forth over the top of Sam’s buzzed head.
Then Biron moved to Sam’s right side starting with that oversized lamb chop sideburn. Slowly Biron moved the clippers up the side of Sam’s face removing that bushy, long and very wide sideburn. Three swipes and it was gone. Biron ran the clippers back around Sam’s right ear towards the back and showered the cape and floor with a pile of red curls. Front-to-back again and again Biron ran the clippers across the right side of Sam’s head reducing those lovely red curls to stubble. Biron then rubbed his hand over the newly buzzed stubble and laughed.
Biron moved around to the back of Sam’s head and ran the clippers up the back of Sam’s head to his crown. Red curls bounded to the floor as Biron’s clippers moved up the back of Sam’s head. Biron seemed to move in a rhythm all his own and slowly got rid of all the bright red curls on the back of Sam’s head. Biron rubbed his hand up the back of Sam’s head several times laughing louder each time.
Moving to Sam’s left side, starting just behind Sam’s left ear, Biron ran the clippers around the ear to the front showering the cape once more with beautiful bright red curls. Then Biron moved around to the front to remove the remaining sideburn. He moved the clippers up the side of Sam’s face and in three swipes got rid of several months worth of bushy sideburn.
Going up to Sam’s left temple, Biron ran the clippers straight back several times very slowly relishing each curl that fell from Sam’s head to the cape and the floor. It was almost like watching super slo-mo sports rewind. Biron was really into it now and finished up buzzing down all those 3” curls on the left side of Sam’s head. He clicked off the clippers and rubbed his hands all over Sam’s buzzed head.
Biron then got out the lotion and straight razor. He lathered up Sam’s head and face and proceeded to reduce the prickly red stubble down to billiard ball smoothness. After shaving Sam’s head and face, Biron rubbed on a tonic that smelled like hospital antiseptic cleaner. Oh, man! Whew! He then rubbed his hands all over Sam’s bald head and danced around him like a Native American warrior. We all laughed and cheered.
Sam was untied and got up rubbing his very bald head. He was horrified when he saw himself in the mirror. We made both Sam and Grant sign an agreement that they would not treat anyone like they had treated Biron and Toby again. Josh is a notary public and he made it official with his stamp. Of course Sam and Grant had to get new photo IDs for the club and that meant that they had to stay bald for at least six months.
Sometimes revenge can be so sweet!
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