Hockey season is over and all the pros have gone home or on vacation or in at least one case stuck in a hot place because of a airline goof-up. Peter Forsberg thought he would just go on vacation to Jamaica after the season ended. He flew non-stop from Denver to Dallas, then changed plans and flew to Atlanta where he was to take another flight to Miami. In other words a nightmare just waiting to happen. Believe it or not, he made it all the way to Atlanta without a hitch. Once the plane took off from Atlanta though, trouble started up. 20 min out of Atlanta they hit a storm and after a lot of turbulence, they landed at our almost long enough runway. Nobody got hurt, but the plane did roll off the end of the runway and into a little gully. Well, everyone got off the plan just fine and were taken to various hotels in the area. They were all told that another plane would be brought in and they would be taken back to Atlanta and another flight to Miami would be arranged. The passengers were then given dinner and told it would be a couple of hours.
Forsberg ate dinner and then decided he was not going to just sit around for a couple of hours. He rented a car and drove around and promptly got lost. Peter finally started getting worried he would miss the plane and looked for a business to call the airport. He ended up in our neighborhood and saw that the shop lights and sign were still on, (Sam, our local cop got off patrol late and I stayed open for him and forgot to turn off the lights once Casey said dinner was ready). Forsberg came up the walk and opened the door. I heard the ring of the bell as the door opened and shut and both Casey and I looked at each other and sighed. We heard a, “Hello, is anyone there?” I came into the shop and nearly fell over. (Be still my beating heart. Down boy, down.)
I told him that I was having dinner and would he mind waiting until I was finished eating before I cut his hair. He got a very funny look on his face and then laughed and told me his sad tale (while my dinner got cold). I told him he could use the phone. I went back into the kitchen and warmed up my dinner. (To say the least, I was disappointed. Just think of all that thick, long, swedish-blond hair getting chopped off. Down boy, down.) Well, I ate my dinner and was cleaning up, when Casey came in and told me to come out to the shop. I handed him the last dirty dish and went out to the shop.
There, sitting in the chair looking at my haircut definition book was Peter. He looked up and I smiled. (Actually, I had a major melt-down). He said that he had missed the plane and was stuck in town. I told him I was very sorry. (You believe that and I’ve got a bridge in Brooklyn I’d love to sell you). He ran his hands through his thick blond hair and said if I was up to it, he’d like to take me up on my original offer a haircut. (Was I up to it? Well, let’s just say I was up.)
As I put the cape around him, I asked if there was a haircut in the definitions book that he liked? He thought for a moment and told me that all the cuts in the book were very short and that he had never had a short cut before and in fact, he had never been in a real barber shop before. Peter picked up the book, closed his eyes, opened the book to a page and put his finger on the page and said that one. He opened his eyes and looked very startled. He handed me the book and said that one. I took the book and tried not to faint - - shaved h & t. I asked are you sure? He took a deep breath, ran is fingers through is long, thick blond hair and said, do it? (Your wish is my command.)
I took out my Oster clippers and put on the #1 (3/32”) attachment. I tilted his head forward and clicked the clippers on. Starting at the middle of his forehead, I shaved straight back, slowly and firmly, all the way back to his crown. 8 “ of thick blond hair fell onto the cape. Over and over again, slowly and firmly front to back shaving off all that beautiful Swedish-blond hair. I reduced that 8” to 3/32” of stubble.
Then, I took off the attachment and starting on his right, I tilted his head away and ran the clippers back from his temple straight back, slowly and firmly. Second, swipe, third swipe. Shaved off the right sideburn, buzz around the ear. Right side shaved. To the back - - -
Tilting his head forward. Shaving up the back of his head nape to crown, slowly and firmly. Over and over again until all that thick blond hair was on the cape or on the floor. Four, slow firm swipes with the clippers up the back of his head and 10” of thick blond hair was history. There was so much on the floor I had to kick it out of the way so I wouldn’t trip. To the left - - -
Tilting his head away I moved to his left side and shaved straight back from his temple back. Slowly, firmly. Buzzzz. Shower of thick blond hair. The mound of hair in his lap kept growing - - (I’m just guessing that most of that growth was the hair). Second swipe straight back. Slowly, firmly. Buzzzz. Third swipe. Buzzzz. Shave off the left sideburn and then buzz around the ear. I used my trusty comb and blended the shaved with the 3/32” buzz on top. Click off the clippers. Done, part one. Mmm Mmm good. (Breathe again.)
I took out the shaving cream and lathered up the sides and back of his very buzzed head. Slowly and carefully, I glided the Mach 3 around the sides and back of his head. After each long, slow swipe, I would rub my thumb back across to see if it was smooth enough. Long, slow swipe, rub. Again and again. Removing the prickly stubble. Leaving silky smooth surface. Long, slow swipe, rub. Rhythmically. Over and over. Then, I shaved his very handsome face ever so slowly and gently. Peter’s blue eyes watching my every swipe. Then I got out my Wintergreen tonic and slowly massaged it all over the sides and back of his head and his face.
It was over too soon. Forsberg, got up and went over to the mirror and rubbed his hands all over his head. He looked at me and gave me a huge smile and thanked me for giving him the best haircut he had ever had. Peter said that he would come back sometime. (Any time, any place blondie.)
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