THE NIGHT THAT ELVIS DIED
It was late July 1987, and the tenth anniversary of Elvis's death
was approaching. Sleazy was slaving away late one night, mopping the floors of a country club where Old Fat Hideous white men regularly gathered to carve up the nation for fun and profit and hand it over to another ghastly Fascist regime. He again had
a revelation from Christ. He began humming the melody to what was to become "The Night that Elvis Died."
Several days later, sleazy emerged from the studio with a
masterpiece, and unleashed it on the public. The focus group, riding in an autombile to the Laurel cinema to embibe the hellish
fumes of an Arnold Shwartzenegger AmeriKKKa propaganda reel, was
treated to the ulitmate antidote to the War Machine indoctrination they were about to recieve: "Revellations 666,"
"Mrs Gxxxx," "The Night that Elvis Died", "Do it if you dare"
"Gutter Song" and "Electric Babies Frying in the Sun". At last
someone told the truth.
However, the demands of bourgoise indoctrination prevented
Sleazy from recording the full album. "Greasy Tony's" and
"Speed Demon, Speed Demon" were never put to tape. The unreleased lyrics are here for you to examine and learn from. Please give them the attention they deserve.
REVELATIONS 666
MRS G_XXXXXX
THE NIGHT THAT ELVIS DIED
AND THE BITCH GODDESS SPOKE
GREASY TONY'S
DO IT IF YOU DARE
GUTTER SONG
SPEED DEMON, SPEED DEMON
ELECTRIC BABIES FRYING IN THE SUN
REVELLATIONS 666
In a run-down, underground bathroom under a gas-station
in New York,
I sat on a shitty old sink.
And as I looked at that booth and it's ten dollar sign.
I was feelin' good, and sorta, kinda fine.
Inside that booth is a rubber inflatable girl doll
With a hole between xx x xx x xxxxx.
And if you stick 50 cents inside the coin slot
The xxxxx begins to lubricate and the doll begins to moan and undulate.
Many a nights I sat there in front of that booth
Watchin' prominent citizens of the town walk in and out.
And as I sat there contemplating the meaning of life
Reciting Morrisey/Aristotle to some guy with a knife,
My brain was basted with the slime of hell.
My mind was in a daze from a lifestyle of too much cheap
sex and cocaine.
and as I watched Mayor Kotch walk out of that booth,
I remember something my Mama told me when I was five years old.
She said, "what I'm about to say may sound strange."
"you may think that I read this in the National Enquirer, but I didn't.
It's from my heart.
I do beleive angels spoke to me last night.
and they told me that Jimmy Swaggart was going to be the next Elvis."
And who do you supose is going to be the next Jimmy Swaggart?
And she said, "You are, my son."
MRS. GXXXX
Mrs. Gxxxx was so poor every night they ate fried eggs.
Mrs. Gxxxx was too pooor to afford a razor to shave her legs.
She had to try to cut off each individual hair,
She ate her own sxxxxx for dinner when the cupboard was bare,
Mrs. Gxxxxx.
Mrs. Gxxxx made obscene phone calls to the neighbors house.
Mrs. Jones could not beleive the rot, coming out of that sick
woman's mouth
Her kids sxxxxx all over people's grass,
Mrs. Jones said they were just poor white trash,
Mrs. Gxxxxx.
Mrs. Gxxxx tried to kill her self, the night that Elvis died.
And when the Gxxxxs sat down for dinner that night,
The eggs were raw, not fried.
And when she heard Mr. Gxxxx's shot gun blast,
Mrs. Jones got out real fast because....
Mrs. Gxxxx's body was buried in the backyard.
Mr. Gxxxxx said "I shoulda killed the bitch years ago"
And went back to playin' cards.
Mr. Gxxxx needed love and sex,
Mr. Gxxxx was cashin' those checks yeah yeah, for
Mrs. Gxxxx.
THE NIGHT THAT ELVIS DIED
My TV set is broken now.
From the time I bashed my kids head into it.
My rubber inflatable vibrating Elvis doll is all put away.
I got a brand new TV set.
It's a color one with remote control
And I sit her watchin' Jimmy Swaggart.
on eight different screens in Quadrophonic sound.
And Jimmy says "I don't give a sxxxx if Elvis died."
But you know he really does,
you know he cried,
The night that Elvis died.
The night that Elvis died.
I was mxxxxxxx, in front of the TV set, honey.
Fantasizing about having sxxxx intercourse.
With Farah Fawcett Majors, and Kate Jackson, and
Jacqueline Smith.
Then that stupid ugly bitch, named Barabara Walters interrupted to say,
"Today is a very sad day."
A very sad day,
It wasn't no time play.
The night that Elvis died.
The night that Elvis died.
He died on the toilet.
Reading "The Scientific Search for the Face of Jesus"
But you never liked him, no.
You said he was just poor white trash like Jimmy Swaggart.
Mrs. Jones, she was a northern girl.
She went shopping at Bloomingdales.
There musta been lotsa sales.
The night that Elvis Died.
The night that Elvis Died.
AND THE BITCH GODDESS SPOKE
It was a cold and clammy day.
The day they came to dig up Mrs. Gxxxx's body.
It was dug up and mailed to the Pope.
You could just smell the Spam.
Pope Swaggart in his New York mansion,
was very pleased.
So pleased that he xxxxxxed the body on
national TV that night for all to see.
I was so excited.
We were so excited.
Yeah.
I once met a woman on the streets of New York.
She was full of filth, full of hell.
She said, I'll sell ya some love.
I said for how much?
She said "ten dollars."
And she gave me the bottle.
I went home and poured it on the floor
and rolled in it.
I was so excited.
I was so excited.
I was so escited I cremed in my pants.
I was walkin' down the streets of New Yorrrrrk.
and I couldn't stand the stench.
I walked past Pope Swaggart's mansion.
Wundrin' what a Baton Rouge boy would want with this hell hole.
And then I thought of some pindly little pinhead
yuppie fag in a Bee Em Dubya.
Some little fag who sits down to take a piss.
Elvis, he woulnd't a sat down in wunnna them things if ya
paid him.
He was a Lincoln man,
and he Stood up.
GREASY TONY'S
Way down on Somerset street,
past the hair salon,
There's a non-stop 24-hour people's revolution goin' on.
If you don't like the food you
better stop outside with the boss.
And if you hold the pizza up to your nose,
You can smell the shit in the sauce.
The waitress Mrs. Phelps puts on a burlesque show at five
and she flops on the countertop for every man alive
The date 1995, but you might think the date is wrong,
Cause the juke box still plays "Da Think I'm SExy?" all
day long.
(CHORUS:)
Greasy Tony's , its the place you need to go
Greasy Tony', the lovin' bungalow.
Greasy Tony's, its the place you need to be.
Greasy Tony's, Its got more action, than the Bagwan Shree.
You wouldn't beleive the day, when the Goverment Inspection team came in
Greasy Tony stood in fronta the door, and said "grease forever, trespassing's a sin"
They didn't appreciate the fact, that the toilet was next to the stove,
They found more health code violations, than in his daughter's treasure trove.
Tony said, these xxxxxxxers won't tel me how to run my business
But when the letter came in the mail, they said they'd clean up his mess
By takin' away his license, and exposin' to the world
what greasy tony does on the shit-stained leopard-skinned sheets with little girls.
CHORUS
And then came the day, the wrecking ball came to town.
The Communists in Washington, came to tear Greasy Tony's down.
Tony shot the man in the wrecker, killed him in one shot.
The customers revolted, the held Greasy Tony high, I heard my Mama cry, and....
REPEAT CHORUS AD NAUSEUM
DO IT IF YOU DARE
She let him put his xxxxx into her xxxxx in the back of a car.
She believed the same old story when he said he wouldn't go that far.
Now she's got a bun in the oven and no lovin' on a
Saturday Night.
but she's got a hot dog xxxxx x x and she's feelin' alright.
When she went to the abortion clinic and tried to walk on in.
But the lady with a fetus in a jar, you know, she said, it
was a sin.
And then she took the fetus out of the jar,
And splattered it all over Wanda's dress!
Now, Jimmy was such a nice man to let her in.
He took her to his Playboy Penthouse mansion just to begin.
He played tapes of his voice to all day on the intercom.
He gave her plastic surgery and a boob-job just like Jessica
Hahn.
He said listen you little, .... bxxxxxx.
You're gonna be princess of my world.
When I become Elvis honey youre gonna be my sex box girl
but only on one condition, you must GOOOOOOO on a mission,
And bring Elvis's body back to me, cause I'm gonna have
xxxxxx with it on national TV.
And when I do this I will be Elvis yeah yeah yeah.
So baby, you better do it if you dare.
GUTTER SONG
My mind was not on...
the disgusting hellish rot.
of the abortions in the streets.
and the aborted fetuses in the gutter.
I was sitting in Central Park.
when suddenly appeared this fat little Italian lady,
who slapped me as if I had my period or something.
and she handed me a coupon for one free abortion at Krazy Vinnies
Aborteria on 12th street.
And the smell of rotting flesh filled my nose
And the sound of squealing pigs filled my ears.
My tounge was in the xxxxxxx of Amy Carter
Come on, little Amy.
ooh you're not so little anymore but I wanna do it with you.
And then I started thinking about the AIDS crisis,
because you know I'm concerned with the vital issues
of the world these days....
when I suddenly had a vision of
Elvis in an xx xxxx chain with Liberace and Rock Hudson
and then I realized...
Elvis died of AIDS.
SPEED DEMON, SPEED DEMON
I was born in dumpster on a Saturday Night.
Mama was whoopin' it up down at Smokie Joe's grease pit.
When suddently she felt this pain in her stomach.
She went back in the alley and shot out a baby.
Dad bit the umbilical cord off with his teeth, and I was born.
I was raised in Lu Ma Ro trailer park.
My daddy taught me how to ride a Harley when I was 4 years old.
I was rammin' the other kids with my tricycle, I was composin' Sunday sermons
when I was 5. Cause Mama gave birth to a
(CHORUS:)
Speed Demon, Speed Demon,
Speed Demon, Speed Demon,
I like to sxxxt, I like to xxxxx,
And I like to eat cocaine.
The people said, Son, you've got the fire, and I was sent to
Baton Rouge Baptist Academy. But I couldn't stand the prissy sissy
faggot ass shit they were handin' me. "Isn't Jesus sweet".
I was lauded by the town, as I exposed the head of the school as a communist-sympathizing
sodomizer,
And as I rammed my harley through the front door of the dean's office,
The crowd cheered "Go Get 'em Jimmy".
At the age of sixteen I was elected to the state legislature on the Harley-Jesus ticket..
Cleaned up the streets of the filth and sin, snorted another round of uppers and gin,
Cause I'm a
(CHORUS:)
I love the southern girls, they rub you down so good.
They take their time, and do it in all the right places.
A man of the Lord and the People has got to have his love,
When I storm New York, and make those fxxxers pay for takin' away this country,
I ain't givin you away,
cause I'm a
(REPEAT CHORUS)
ELECTRIC BABIES FRYING IN THE SUN
Jimmy always made his women wear plastic bust enhancers when ever he had sex with em.
But the time came when one got tired of that.
She said, Jimmy, I'm not your mindless wench,
And for that, he shot her dead.
Jimmy always beleived everything he read in the Enquirer, including the one about how Jesus,
was gonna return in the form of a Giant Squid.
Or the woman who removed her own appendix and replaced her husband's brain with it,
But he couldn't beleive what he read today....
(CHORUS)
Elvis was a lady.
Electric, child, little babies.
Frying in the sun, yeah.
Jimmy's voyage to Graceland to dig up the body of Elvis was cancelled.
And they got kind of nervous when he never came home.
Especially Barbara Walters, who was gettin' kind of excitied.
Because she thought Jimmy might have sex with her...yeah
CHORUS
They looked everywhere, they couldn't find Jimmy.
They looked in the massage parlors, they looked in every establishment
that sold Swank and Juggs and Erotic X-Film magazine.
And when they finally found him I won't tell you how cause the rest is history.
I guess that's what you get for belveiving everything you read.....
in the most accurate newspaper in the universe.
CHORUS
Oh yeah.
I do beleive it's true, I beleive it's true.
That noboby cried.
The night that Jimmy died.
