E.O.F.O.: I’m gonna wait for everybody to get over here before we get started.

Justin: Yeah, yeah, these lazy fucking slow bastards - I mean these great people who are in the band.

E.O.F.O.: Wonderful people. Okay, I guess I’ll wait for Pat. (Laughter.)

Justin: Pat just stepped in the puddle.

E.O.F.O.: Say your names and what you play in the band.

Justin: Justin Sane and I play guitar.

Cock: Cock and I play bass.

Chris: I play guitar and I’m 19.

Pat: I’m Pat, I play drums.

E.O.F.O.: How old are the rest of you?

Everyone: 19.

E.O.F.O.: All of you 19?

Pat: Right on.

E.O.F.O.: Wow, you’re not that much older than I am. Start out young, be a punk. (Laughter.)

E.O.F.O.: How’d the band get started and what made you guys start doing what you’re doing?

Justin: Well, we started the band, Pat and I back in...

Cock: Back in the day.

Justin: ‘89 (laughter.) Yeah, I don’t know, ‘93 or something or like that, I don’t know. We started the band, we were friends.

Cock: And they were losers.

Justin: Yeah, really we were losers.

E.O.F.O.: I know how it is.

Justin: Cause you know what, what it was was Pat and I were the only straight-edge kids in town and all the other kids were getting fucked up and drunk, not that there’s anything wrong with that, but it wasn’t our thing so we never had anything to do.

Pat: We didn’t get invited to all the cool parties.

Justin: Yeah, that’s it.

E.O.F.O.: I used to get beat up in high school, like constantly, all the time.

Justin: I’m right there with you, bro.

Pat: I used to beat up kids like you in high school.

E.O.F.O.: Yeah, and I’m the one who sued the pants off your parents. (Laughter.) No, I’m just kidding.

Justin: Yeah, that’s cool. But yeah, Pat and I just started playing cause we didn’t really fit in with the other kids, so I played guitar and Pat played drums.

Eric (the sound guy): Okay, guys, whenever you’re ready.

Justin: Okay, we’re just gonna finish up this interview real quick.

E.O.F.O.: What happened with all your line up changes?

Justin: Okay, well, Andy quit over a year ago, then through that time we just had some friends fill in, and but now we’ve got a permanent line up.

Cock: So, what you’re saying is me and Chris aren’t your friends.

Justin: Right, we don’t like them.

E.O.F.O.: Man, you guys catch on incredibly quick. (Laughter.)

Justin: They are pretty smart. I’ll give ‘em that.

E.O.F.O.: How did you write the song "Go-Go Dancer"?Is it just a little piddly song you wrote or does it mean something? It’s our favorite song.

Justin: Nah, it’s just a cheesy song.

Cock: We dedicated that song to you last time.

Justin: Yeah!

Cock: I knew it.

E.O.F.O.: You remembered! Yeah, we love that song.

Justin: That’s cool. I’m glad you like it.

E.O.F.O.: Better play it tonight.

Justin: Okay.

Cock: Oh, we will.

Justin: We’ll play it. For you.

E.O.F.O.: Aw. But how’d you write it? What came about it?

Justin: Ah, I don’t know, Andy really wrote most of that song so I don’t know. You’ll have to ask him.

E.O.F.O.: All right. Any questions you wanna ask me?

Pat: Ahh...

Justin: The Infected Spoon band is awesome.

Pat: Yeah.

E.O.F.O.: Inflicted.

Justin: Oh, inflicted. Do you like Alternative TV?

E.O.F.O.: Uh, I don’t know.

Justin: It’s a band, Alternative TV.

Pat: Check ‘em out.

E.O.F.O.: Oh, really?

Justin: Your band reminds me of Alternative TV.

Cock: Yeah.

Justin: They’re like a 1977 like punk band. They’re fucking awesome.

E.O.F.O.: I’ll have to check ‘em out.

Cock: I have a question about the name.

Justin: Yeah.

E.O.F.O.: Okay, this is on the record, this is totally true to my knowledge. The bass player, a lot of shit’s happened to that motherfucker, big, tall, ugly dude. (Laughter.) All right, he basically lives for movie and television and his dreams reflect movies and television and what he’s seen on the big screen. And he had this dream that he was being killed or chased or something had to do with this nasty, twisted, mangled, corroded, rusted, inflicted spoon. (Laughter.)

Justin: That’s where it came from?

E.O.F.O.: That’s where the name came from. Some dream.

Cock: Okay.

Justin: So, if he was being chased by a sausage you’d have been Inflicted Sausage. (Laughter.)

E.O.F.O.: We’d be Snausagelong. (Laughter.) How’d you guys get on NRA? How’d you do that? Cause we’re affiliated with them, they send us a lot of stuff. Ads and shit. They’re cool.

Justin: Oh, really? That’s cool. That’s great. Well, they’re really cool. I’m sure that if you’ve worked with them at all then you would know that.

E.O.F.O.: We interviewed the UK Subs that night and printed what we had.

Justin: Oh, great. Well, just a friend of ours had our tape and gave it to Nicky who runs New Red Archives and Nicky liked it and so he called us up. As simple as that.

E.O.F.O.: Cool. Do you have any more releases coming out, any 7"s, CDs, albums or anything?

Justin: We do, but we just don’t know any realease dates really. We had a split CD, I don’t know if you’ve ever heard or seen that split CD with us and this band from Vancouver called DVS. It’s not being pressed anymore. Our songs on that CD are going to be reissued Justin and

Pat: With some live songs.

E.O.F.O.: Yeah?

Justin: And that should be out hopefully the end of this year.

Cock: Then, there’s the...

Justin: Then there’s the new thing we’re gonna do. We’re gonna do a brand new full length, but that will be within the year.

Cock: Yeah, there’s a split with Against All Authority is out. We had some but we didn’t bring enough with us on tour so we sold out.

E.O.F.O.: Way to go.

Pat: The live split picture disc with The Dred.

Cock: And that, we sold out of that one too.

Pat: That sold out too.

Cock: We were supposed to get this one split that was with a band from Japan called Obnoxious. Justin and

Pat: It never arrived.

Cock: Yeah, we didn’t get that one.

Justin: Everybody else has seen it but us.

E.O.F.O.: Do you have any significant others back at home? Any of you guys married or dating?

Cock: Nope, except Pat.

Justin: Um, no, kinda dating someone.

E.O.F.O.: You’re all gay. (Laughter.)

Justin: Yeah, we’re all gay.

Pat: I have a significant person.

E.O.F.O.: Yeah? You married or anything? Any kids?

Pat: No, no, no, bite your tongue.

E.O.F.O.: No, hell no, go to hell, blow me.

Pat: She’s already been married. She doesn’t want to do it again.

E.O.F.O.: Sounds like my dad. Okay, a hometown mailing address so it doesn’t have to go through the record label.

Justin: Oh, yeah. A-F, PO Box 71266, Pittsburgh, PA 15213.

Pat: Definitely mail it to us.

E.O.F.O.: Yeah, nothing against NRA, but when I mail to the record label it just takes forever, so I mail it straight to the band.

Pat: We make sure our address is on all our releases.

Justin: It’s on all of our releases.

Pat: We even put it on things that aren’t our releases so write to us through that.

E.O.F.O.: I’ll be sure to put not to write to Anti-Flag cause the Post Office hates that. I remember I read that somewhere.

Justin: Yeah, exactly. They fucking rip our mail open, rip it up, you name it, they do it.

E.O.F.O.: Well, I guess if I have anymore questions I’ll hunt you guys down and tie you to the hood of my car. Cock and

Pat: Okay.

E.O.F.O.: Thanx for taking the time.

Justin: Yeah, fuck yeah, this was really cool. I’m glad we finally got to do it. Glad we got to see your band, fucking awesome.

E.O.F.O.: Thanx man.

Justin: Inflicted.

E.O.F.O.: Inflicted Spoon.

Justin: Inflicted! Okay.

E.O.F.O.: Spoontang. You gotta check out our web page. We got a web page.

Justin: All right. You have to send me a tape. If I give you money, will you send me a tape?

E.O.F.O.: I’ll send you a tape anyway.

Justin: Are you sure? I’ll give you money.

E.O.F.O.: I’m positive. We have a web page for our zine too and we linked your site and NRA to it.

Justin: Aw, thanks.

Pat: We don’t know what that is, but it sounds great.

E.O.F.O.: We’ll write it down and give it to you guys. It’s not all that. Basically, we’re giving you free advertising cause you’re so awesome. So I guess we’ll let you guys go play.

Justin: If you would send me a tape, I would love that.

E.O.F.O.: We will definitely do that.

Justin: And you need to check out Alternative TV. You’ll fucking love them.

E.O.F.O.: I will.

Justin: Alternative TV.

E.O.F.O.: You guys ever heard of Special Duties? A friend of mine gave me a tape and was like ‘You sound like Special Duties. Listen to it.’ He was talking about "Anthem" the song I wrote. He’s like ‘That sounds just like Special Duties.’

Justin: That’s cool. Well, get anything that’s like the best of Alternative TV. Go to like your local cool record store and ask them if they can order anything by Alternative TV. They’ll look it up.

E.O.F.O.: I will fucking do that.

Justin: And then like the best stuff is anything that has some live stuff on it with some studio stuff.

Cock: They’re wacky live.

Justin: Yeah, it’s cool. You’ll dig it, man. It’s a good band.

E.O.F.O.: All right, I’ll get that.

Justin: Okay, we’re gonna go play. Fuck yeah, thanx a lot. (Jumbled thank yous.)