Past Reviews

Van Wilder: Party Liaison By Emma Clark

Directed by: Walt Becker (Buying the Cow)

Stars: Ryan Reynolds ("Two guys and a girl", Dick)

Tara Reid (American Pie, Cruel Intentions)

Van Wilder is this story of college student Van Wilder (Reynolds), crazy campus party planner extraordinaire. But when Van's father cuts his tuition and board, because his son is in his seventh year of college and still has no degree, Van must find his own way to make money so he can stay in school.  Meanwhile straight laced college paper reporter Gwen Pearson (Reid) is writing an article on the legendary Wilder. Romance between the two predictably ensues.

I finished watching this movie and all I could think was, wow, there's $3.45 and 90 minutes of my life I'm never going to get back. 90 minutes of crude language and repulsive jokes, most involving a dog's genitalia, that not even Ryan Reynolds' looks could detract from. Granted, you can't expect "Citizen Kane" from the National Lampoon crowd, but at least "Vegas Vacation" and the lesser known "Senior Trip" made you laugh.  All in all, "Van Wilder" left me with little more than a bad taste in my mouth, which had nothing to do with the cream buns.

Emma's Rating       

The Hot Chick

Directed by: Tom Brady (The Animal, "Home Improvement")

Stars: Rob Schneider (Deuce Bigalow, The Animal)

Anna Faris (Scary Movie, Scary Movie 3)

I was expecting this movie to be hilarious and because of this I knew that it would not live up to my expectations, therefore having cancelled out any of my preconceptions or expectations I found myself very confused as you also may be having read this.  Okay now down to the serious stuff.  This movie was stupid, silly, similar joke wise to Deuce Bigalow, had Adam Sandler wearing a really unconvincing wig and I loved it.  It is just the kind of stupid brainless humor that I can't get enough of and the clothes that Rob Schneider wears as Jessica are hilarious.  If you liked Deuce Bigalow you will like this, if not, don't bother.  

My Rating

The Lord of the Rings, The Two Towers 

Directed by: Peter Jackson (Brain Dead)

Stars: Elijah Wood (North, Flipper)

Ian McKellen (Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban)

I don't really know what to say about this movie except that it is the coolest.  I think everyone in Mazeltov has seen it perhaps with the exception of Linda, so there really is not much I can say about it.  One thing I can say though is that I thought the short jokes about Gimli were funny, funny, funny and all those dumb ass people who were complaining about them can kiss my "buns of steel".   Oh and I have to agree with Emma and Amy, there really was some serious sexual tension between Aragorn and Legolas.  I can't wait until The Return of the King to see when Aragorn leaves Arwen because he finally realises that he is in love with Legolas and Sam and Frodo finally get it on.... Oh wait this isn't an episode of Queer as Folk, oh well perhaps they will put it into the extended version. 

My Rating