Saturday, January 20, 2001: A Warehouse, Orlando, FL

"Stop!" Wade yelled. He walked towards the stage. "This is simple stuff, guys. We don’t have time to be missing simple stuff."

"Sorry," Joey breathed. He leaned over, bracing his hands against his knees. "I’ll get it next time."

"That’s what you said last time," Wade said. "And the time before that. You better get it this time, because we aren’t going to move on until I see this routine perfected, and we don’t have time to not move on."

Chris groaned. "I hate this song." He glared at the speakers flanking the side of the stage.

"People are paying to see you sing and dance," Wade continued. "There’s not going to be any special stuff to draw people’s attention away from the mistakes you guys make."

"We know," JC said. "Let’s just do it again, okay?"

"Yes, please," Wade said. He ran a hand through his blond hair. "Now all of you need bring that foot up higher. We need to exaggerate movements. The people in the very back row of the Rose Bowl need to be able to see you."

"We know," JC said again. "We’ll get it right this time."

Wade turned away from the makeshift stage and cued the music. "And on three. One, and two, and three."

"You’re all I ever wanted," JC sang. "You’re all I ever needed…"

Manhattan, Kansas

The car was moving quickly down the freeway.

Justin tapped his fingers against the armrest of the front passenger seat, the country music blasting through the speakers of the car completely drowning out the sound. He closed his eyes. Two and a half months submerged in a country oriented musical environment and he still hadn’t learned to like it.

"This is going to be the best game," Stu said. His voice was quivering with excitement. He leaned forward and rested his elbows on the shoulder rests of the two front seats of the car. "My dad tried to get tickets for us last year, but they were sold out."

"They were pretty hard to come by," Bob said. The older man flicked on the turn signal and switched lanes. "But I have connections."

"They’re really good seats too," Justin said. He held up the three tickets in his hand. "Close to the floor."

"It should be a good game," Bob said. "It’s not going to decide any championships, or anything, but the teams are pretty closely matched."

"Those are the best games," Justin said. "The kind that keeps you on the edge of your seat."

"This should do that," Stu said. "’Cause K-State has Reynolds, and Reid, but KU has Gooden."

Justin nodded, in an attempt to look like he knew the names.

"What’s your team, Randy?" Bob asked.

"You mean for this game?" Justin asked. He shrugged. "Who’s better?"

"K-State," Stu said. "Definitely. They’re just, so… I would do anything to play for them next year. Getting in is the first step though."

"You’ll get in," Justin said. He turned towards Bob. "What about you, Mr. Hunter? Who’s your team?"

"K-State," Bob said. "After this game you’ll be a convert. There’s nothing like interstate rivalries to make a game interesting."

"I’m sure I will be," Justin said. His gaze drifted out the window to the rapidly darkening sky.

"Are you going to play ball at school next year, Randy?" Bob asked.

Justin swallowed convulsively. "I, uh—, haven’t decided yet."

"You could probably walk on," Bob said. "The way you guys are doing this season you’re going to be a hot commodity. I’m surprised people haven’t been calling our house already."

"We’re going to be number one," Stu said. His eyes glanced at Justin quickly. "I want the League trophy."

"You’ll have to beat Parker," Bob said. "They’ll be ready to avenge their near loss. None of the papers could believe you only lost by one point"

"And we’ve gotten a lot better since then," Stu said. "They won’t be expecting us to be that much better."

"You will be on your home turf," Bob said. "That should give you an advantage. The whole town will be out to support you next Thursday."

"I hope so," Justin said. His lips formed a lopsided grin. "I don’t want to lose to them again. I don’t like being second best."

"None of us do," Stu said. "It’s time to show Wichita that Parker’s not number one anymore."

The familiar, clawing fear started when Bob pulled into the line of cars waiting to get into the parking lot. At first, it was just a tickle at the back of his mind.

It got worse as the parking attendant handed Bob a permit to stick in the front window of the car.

And it got even worse as Justin saw the hundreds of people walking towards the stadium. He tugged his hat down low over his eyes, and wiped his hands on his pants. There was a damp streak where his palms slid over the cloth.

It had been so long since he’d felt anything like it— anything even remotely like it— he almost didn’t recognize the feeling for what it was. Fear. Claustrophobia. The need to get away, to not be recognized, to run, hide, and never emerge from the unknown life he’d created for himself.

It was the feeling that had driven him from ‘N SYNC.

"You okay?" Stu asked. The soft, low-pitched voice startled him from his reverie.

Justin looked at his friend and saw concern on Stu’s face.

"Don’t freak out on us, okay?" Stu said. "I don’t think Bob would understand."

Justin looked at Maggie’s father who was walking in front of them. "I didn’t even think about all the people," he said.

"You’re Randy," Stu said. "Not—" he dropped his voice so it was nearly silent, "—Justin. No one will be looking for you. No one’s going to notice you."

Justin nodded. He could feel cool perspiration on his neck. He knew he was pale.

"You’re only here to observe," Stu said. He put a hand on Justin’s shoulder and squeezed slightly. "It’s not like you’re going to be getting out on the court or anything. It’s going to be fun."

Justin nodded again. He moved his lips into a tight grin "You’re right." He pulled the brim of his hat even lower. "I’m only here to have fun."

‘N SYNC Compound

"What are you doing?" Lance asked JC as he walked into the living room.

"I felt like watching some TV," JC said. He was stretched out on the couch. "The K-State, KU basketball game is on."

"Okay," Lance said slowly. He sat down in one of the chairs and crossed his legs. "You don’t watch basketball."

"Yeah I do," JC said. He turned his head so he was looking at Lance. "I watch it sometimes. I watched it with Justin."

"But when have you ever watched the Kansas teams?" Lance asked. "I thought you would have put a block on Kansas by now."

"He’s in Kansas, Lance. I know he is." JC turned his head back to the TV.

"We all know that," Lance said. "Unless he’s moved in the last week since I told you guys everything."

"He’s probably watching the game," JC continued. "Cause when has Curly ever missed a basketball game?"

Lance nodded. He truly wasn’t sure where JC was taking the conversation.

"I just feel like if I watch it, and he’s watching it, then maybe we’re still doing something together." JC’s eyes remained focused on the television.

"Oh," Lance said.

"It’s stupid, I know," JC said. "But I miss him. I miss my friend."

"We all miss him," Lance said. "Somewhere beneath all the anger, the sense of betrayal, we all miss him."

"Yeah," JC said. "I just wish he’d email us, and tell us it’ll all be okay."

"It will be," Lance said. "He’s probably sitting where ever the hell he is, watching this game, and wishing he were the one out in front of the crowds. You know he’s got to be starting to go stir crazy from lack of attention."

"I bet he is," JC said. His voice was lighter than it had been before. "He never could stay out of the spotlight for long."

Justin was huddled in the crowd. The brim of his baseball hat was low over his face, covering his eyes, skin, and features in shadow. He was wearing generic clothing, nothing that would stand out, draw the cameras to him, or would make him visible when the cameras inevitably focused on his section of the crowd.

He’d rarely had so much fun in his life.

Two and a half months before, Justin had never played in a real basketball game. He’d only watched college basketball, twice from the sidelines, heavily flanked by bodyguards, but mostly on TV sets in hotel rooms across the nation with the other guys.

Now, compared to the high school games he was used to the college basketball games seemed more aggressive, more trained, and more controlled.

They also looked more serious, and more fun.

It was a good game. The teams were evenly matched, keeping the alternating lead to three points until a minute before halftime.

It was when one of the Kansas State players ended up on his back, that K-State took a five-point lead off the free throws. And then another jump shot with one second left on the clock pushed the lead up to seven. The K-State fans began jumping up and down as the buzzer sounded. The KU players glared.

"P-U, K-U," some students near the top of the stadium began yelling, and the cheer rapidly took over the stands.

Bob turned to Justin. "I’m going to go say hello to Jim up there." He pointed up the stands to a man about his age. "See you boys back here." He began weaving his way over people’s feet in an attempt to make it to the aisle.

Justin stood up and looked at Stu. "You want to go get a soda?"

"Sure," Stu said. He stood up and ran a hand through his hair. He began the delicate process of making it the aisle.

Justin followed, his feet clumsily landing on more people’s toes than he would have wished. "Excuse me, sorry, sorry." He nearly fell into Stu as he wove his way around the last person. "Sorry."

"This is the best game," Stu said as they started up the stairs to the landing. He was practically glowing. "Better than I thought it would be."

"Yeah," Justin said. "I may be a convert after all."

"You mean K-State is going to replace UNC as your favorite?" Stu asked. His voice held mock surprise and amusement. They headed out into the concourse and worked their way through the people, trying to find the concession stand.

"Wha?" Justin asked. "No. How’d you know Carolina was my favorite?"

"Hello," Stu said. He rolled his eyes. "You’ve met my little sister. We have UNC posters, t-shirts, the works."

"Oh," Justin said. "Well… K-State’ll be a close second."

Stu nodded. He grinned suddenly. "You know it’s been a long time since I’ve seen you without your other half."

"Wha?" Justin asked again. He genuinely looked confused.

"Maggie," Stu said. "It’s been a long time since I’ve seen you without her."

Justin felt his lips curl in a grin. "We’ve been doing good recently."

"I noticed," Stu said. He rolled his eyes. "It’s hard not to notice when you guys are making out in the hall every break."

"It’s high school," Justin said. "It’s what you’re supposed to do, isn’t it?" He blinked slowly, and felt his smile fade. "Isn’t it?"

Stu shrugged. "I guess. It’s called getting a room though, PDA."

"Well, other people are worse than we are," Justin said. "Kevin and Amanda."

"They’re practically married," Stu said. "They have been since they started going out. The minute they got together the rest of the world ceased to exist."

The two teens got in the concession line.

"Are Mags and I like that?" Justin said. "We can’t be at her house because I feel like her parents are always watching."

"You’re getting there," Stu said. "I mean it's high school love. You’re supposed to be all over each other."

"It’s not love, yet," Justin said. He drew out the word, and blushed slightly. "Besides, I’ve never had a girlfriend who didn’t care what people thought when we were seen together. I’m enjoying it while it lasts."

"You’re more than enjoying it," Stu said. "You’re fucking whipped, dude. Going out to lunch, picking her up at the video store, ignoring every other girl in the school."

"Like you can talk," Justin said. He rolled his eyes. "The only girl you’ve looked at in the past month is Emily."

"What are you talking about?" Stu asked. He turned slightly red.

"You know damn well," Justin said. "You and Emily really just need to suck face and get it over with."

"It’s called being friends, Smith," Stu said. "Try it sometime."

"Oh, I’ve been friends," Justin said. "And it fucking sucks, so just get over your player personae and admit you’ve found a girl you like."

"F-R-I-E-N-D-S," Stu spelled out. "That is it. And don’t you go getting any ideas in Maggie’s head about setting Em and me up. We don’t want it."

"So you have talked about it," Justin said. He grinned slyly at Stu.

"No," Stu said. "I just know her."

"Oh," Justin said. He laughed. "You’re a dumbass,Cross."

"And you’re a prick," Stu said.

Justin dissolved into laughter. "What would I do without you, man?"

"Don’t know," Stu said. "Go insane, be famous, be attached to Maggie at the hip and lips?"

"Now that option doesn’t sound so bad," Justin said.

"And you say you aren’t in love," Stu said.

The people in front of them peeled away from the counter and Stu and Justin stepped forward, both of them leaning against the formica surface.

"A coke," Stu said. "And one of those nacho thingys, with extra cheese."

"Same for me," Justin said. He stuck his hand in his pocket and grabbed a five-dollar bill. He rested it on the counter carefully avoiding the spilled seven-up. "Are the nacho’s good here?"

Stu shrugged. "It’s a basketball game. You’ve got to get nacho’s."

"Oh," Justin said. "Okay."

Stu rolled his eyes. "You still have a lot to learn about Kansas, man."

"Well Mill Creek isn’t exactly the place to learn the ways of the world," Justin retorted.

"Having a permanent attachment isn’t either," Stu said. "Next weekend. It’s going to be you, me, Matt, Kev… I’m not letting you leave here without a full education."

"Cool," Justin said. He grabbed the nacho’s and the soda that were pushed at him. "Sound’s good."

They headed back to their seats.

"What are we watching?" Chris asked as he came into the living room. "Basketball?"

"K-State vs. KU," JC said. He was sitting forward. His eyes didn’t leave the TV.

"Since when have any of us been fans of either of the Kansas teams," Chris asked. He sat down on the other end of the couch.

"Since Justin went to Kansas," Lance said. "Josh was figuring that he’s probably watching this game. So we’re watching this game."

"Oh," Chris said. A slightly worried look passed over his face. "What brought this on?"

"Just missin’ Justin," JC said. "That’s it. Wanted to do something normal and non-‘N SYNC related. This seemed like a good idea."

"Who’s winning?" Chris asked.

"K-State," Lance said. "By nine."

"Okay," Chris said. "Who do you think Justin’s rooting for?"

"K-State?" Lance said, though the words sounded more like a question. "They seem to be better players. He normally roots for the better team."

"Oh," Chris said. "Well it’s good they’re winning then, huh?"

"Yeah," JC said. "It is."

Chris watched as the camera panned over the crowd. "Wouldn’t it be weird if Justin was there?"

"Yeah," Lance said. "It would be."

"You think he’d go out into that many people?" JC asked. "Someone would recognize him."

"I didn’t say he was there," Chris said. "I said wouldn’t it be weird if he was."

The three men had neglected to notice the person in the upper left hand corner of the screen, hat pulled low over his face, dressed unobtrusively, nacho’s in hand. The camera panned back to the game, and the picture was gone.

Justin folded the felt K-State pendant in his hands. The fabric was stiff.

"Told you you’d be a convert," Stu said. He punched Justin in the arm. "Wasn’t that the best game ever?"

"It was," Justin said. He smiled. His body was relaxed. He had been around more people than he’d dreamed about in months, and he hadn’t been recognized. "I’ll have to try to get to another game sometime."

"I’m glad you enjoyed it," Bob said. He grinned like a teenager as they pulled up to the Hunter house. "I always enjoy the games, and Maggie and my wife just don’t enjoy going."

"That was definitely one of the best games I’ve ever been to," Justin said. "It was so close up until the very end."

"Last year the game wasn’t so good," Bob said. "KU won by 20, but we more than made up for it tonight."

"Sure did," Justin said. "We sure did."

Bob shifted the car gear into park, and the three men got out of the vehicle.

"You want to come up for awhile?" Justin asked Stu.

Stu looked down at his watch. "I think I’d better get home. Got to be up bright and early to milk the cows!" His voice took on a tone of fake enthusiasm.

"Coo," Justin said. He stuck his hand out and slapped Stu’s outstretched hand. "I’ll see you tomorrow then, ‘k?"

"Yeah," Stu said. "Sure thing. And thanks for inviting me to go along tonight."

"Who else would I invite?" Justin asked. He grinned, happily, easily. "You knew I was going to ask you."

Stu shrugged. "I was hoping." He stuck his hands in his pocket and began walking down the walkway. "See ya ‘round."

"Bye," Justin said.

He walked up the steps, across the porch, and into the kitchen. The room was impossibly cheery and warm. He shrugged off his jacket, and hung it up by the door. He walked through the house, stopping at the den. He saw Maggie curled up, a book clutched tightly in her hands.

"Hey," Justin said. He leaned over the couch and kissed her nose. "What you reading?"

"A book," Maggie said. "You know the things with words, and paper, and well, words?"

Justin rolled his eyes. He walked around the couch and sat down on the end. Maggie immediately repositioned herself so she was leaning up against him. His arm went around her shoulders.

"Listen Mags," Justin started. "Do you want to go out to dinner on Monday? Someplace nice?"

Maggie looked surprised, but nodded. She cocked her head slightly as she looked up at him. "Why?"

"Oh, no reason," Justin said. "Just a little dinner in honor of one month since deciding we didn’t make a mistake."

"Oh," Maggie said. She blushed. "I wasn’t sure you’d remember. Guys aren’t normally into the whole one month thing."

Justin cocked his head to the right. "How could I not be? It was one of the happier moments in the past year."

Maggie blushed. "So someplace nice?"

Justin nodded. "Think we can get your parent’s car for the evening? So we can go to Wichita?"

"Sure," Maggie said. "Mom’ll let us drive the truck. It’s not the epitome of nice, but—"

"It’s transportation," Justin said. "That’s what matters."

"Exactly," Maggie said. She moved her head and kissed Justin on the lips. "I saw you on TV."

Justin looked at the TV impulsively. "When?" His blood went cold, his body broke out in a sweat. If Maggie had seen him—

"During the game," Maggie said. "Sometime after halftime. I just looked up and there you were. Well, I saw dad first, then Stu. If you hadn’t been wearing the hat I’d bought you, and if you hadn’t been standing between dad and Stu, I probably would have looked right over you."

"Wow," Justin said. Relief flooded through his veins. "I didn’t know you were going to watch the game."

"Well, I wasn’t," Maggie said. "Then I thought I might have a chance to see you guys on TV. Isn’t it cool? You can forever say you’ve been broadcast all over the world."

"Yeah," Justin said. "My life’s ambition."

"I’ll be on TV someday," Maggie said. She grinned slightly. "Just wait and see."

"I’m sure you will be," Justin said. He looked at the TV and back at Maggie. She probably would be on TV someday, and not the way either of them wanted her to be.