Q Questionnaire                                                               

Infinitely more frightening than a white hot jacksie-bound poker and marginally less scary than an invite to lunch with claire Rayner, these are the questions to quake to. Would this month's raw-throated rockular vocalmeister please bend over and grit his teeth...

Q: What's the first thing you do when you wake up in the morning?
BA: Rub my eyes, scratch myself all over, make a few disgusting noises and then make some fresh fruit juice.

Q: What was the first gig you went to?

BA: Apart from gigs at school, the first proper gig I went to was David Bowie's Diamond Dogs in the Exhibition Centre, Ottawa, Ontario, Canada. It was around '73 so I'd have been about 13 or 14. It was just great. He wouldn't come back on for an encore and the crowd smashed the place to pieces, threw all the seats at the equipment and totalled the stage. The other funny thing that happened was that he had a cherry picker and it went up and got stuck and wouldn't come down. So we all got a good old laugh out of that.

Q: Which song do you wish you had written?
BA: That's really easy. They're Coming To Take Me Away Haha. Seriously.

Q: What is the best piece of advice you've ever received?
BA: "A handshake is better than a contract." From my manager. We've been together now since I was 18 and we've never had a contract. We did it all on a handshake. Any time i've signed a contract with anyone there's been trouble. A hand shake is more honourable. The other best piece of advice I ever received is, Become a vegetarian. Before that I was a meat-eating beast.

Q: What is your most treasured material possession?
BA: A Neve recording console I have which came out of the original Air studios. It's one of three that were designed by george Martin and Geoff Emerick. It got sold from Air studios to Atlantic studios and then I bought it.

Q: Who was the last person you slept with?
BA: My neighbours. I didn't exactly sleep with them but they were making so much noise it certainly felt like it. But truthfully it was Cecilie.

Q: What do you think of Bob Dylan?
BA: when we played with him in Belfort in France he insisted on going on before us because he wanted to go and have his dinner. He was extremely gracious to me. I felt very humbled.

Q: When did you last cry and why?
BA: That would have to be when I got knocked off the Number 1 posiyion after 16 weeks by U2 with The Fly. That was very painful.

Q: What characteristics do you think you've inherited from your parents?
BA: Less than I can think of but more than I can imagine.

Q: What's the biggest myth about fame?
BA: That backstage is the place to be.

Q: What are you like when you're drunk?
BA: The bestest friend you ever had.

Q: Who would you have play you in a film?
BA: Kirk Douglas during his Spartacus years.

Q: Pick five words to describe yourself.
BA: Approachable, dogmatic, stubborn, passionate, Canuck bastard. That's six. One free.

Q: Is there one piece of criticism that sticks in your mind?
BA: When I was growing up in the Middle East, my English teacher, who was East Indian, used to say to me, Your mind is in the gutter.

Q: Do you believe in God?
BA: I believe the Earth is God, seeing that it's the mother of all creation. I'm not religious.

Q: What's your most unpleasant characteristic?
BA: I get really grumpy if I haven't eaten.

Q: What's your greatest fear?
BA: Falling out of an Italian aeroplane.

Q: What ambitions do you still have to fulfil?
BA: To see as much of the world as possible. I've toured all over but I haven't seen anything. For example, I haven't seen any of Africa, South America and there's a whole bunch of places down in the South Pacific that I'd love to visit.

Q: Are you afraid of failure?
BA: I shouldn't be but I am. Being afraid is what drives me. Like, I recorded my last album twice.

Q: What do you never leave home without?
BA: Shoes.

Q: Who is your best male and best female friend?
BA: I don't know anyone who's both.

Q: Who would you most like to meet?
BA: I'd like to meet the guy who decides how they package Marks & Spencer's food. The quality of the food is good but I want to know why they use all that plastic when it's completely unnecessary. Even McDonald's, even if you don't like the food, has one of the best recycling programmes for a large corporation. Marks & Spencer's is just a massive, blatant waste and I want to know why. I want them to write to me and tell me what they're going to do about it.

Q: What music would you have played at your funeral?
BA: It would be a double A-side: Hey Honey I'm Packin' You In and that song that goes, The worms crawl in and the worms crawl out/ In your stomach and out your mouth.

Q: When you look in the mirror do you like what you see?
BA: I have no choice in the matter.

Q: Do you have anything to declare?
BA: So far, so good.

From Sandra's Bryan Adams Page