SOMEONE TO BLAME
They’re saying Wilma broke a bottle over Betty’s head
It was all Betty could do to jump back into bed
Barney got home and he soon got mad
He took the biggest brick he could and he wiped out Fred
Only yourself, you’ve only got yourself to blame
It’s a dirty rotten shame, you gotta change your name
Everybody’s looking for someone to blame
Well I heard that L D Nathan had a chat with the cops
Made a noise about me playing at the local bus stop
Three weeks later when the temperature dropped
I drank a gallon full o’ beer and I pissed in his shop
Only yourself, etc.
Junior had a mishap with his acupuncture set
He’s got a body full of holes, he can’t forgive or forget
Like his friends the hypochondriacs he’s always in debt
Saying, "Life’s just a gamble and I’m too young to bet!"
Only yourself, etc.
FAMILY LOVE SONG
Well my brother was in the country, my sister was in a state
Rolling round under the plum tree crying "It’s late, oh God, it’s late!"
Well the government ran outta money and my daddy he ran outta luck
Running from a nasty nickname but it stuck, ooh yeah it stuck
Gotta keep it in the family
Like the presents at the bottom of the Christmas tree
Love your baby, love your neighbour, love your enemy
And if there’s any love left, give a little to me
Well my mama was in a convent, praying for her family’s souls
Heaping thanks ‘n’ praises upon them, now she’s growing old, ooh mama you’re growing old
My cousin was in the army, driving up and down in a tank
He took a little holiday detour and he robbed a bank, bang bang bang, you know he robbed a bank
Gotta keep it in the family, etc.
HAVE YOU SEEN YOUR SHADOWS, BABY
Thanks for all your trouble
I would love to meet your double sometime
I got papers to sign
I got a hill to climb
Up from the jungle
See things, ooh, Aunt Jane and Uncle Floyd
Took great pains to avoid
They’re so very paranoid, a-annoyed
No visible sign of weakness
Standing with your playmates underneath the city lights
Just you and your good companions
Looking for a reasonable excuse for a fight
Just you and your drunken shadows
Chopping up the wee small hours like a pocketknife
How come each one of those good companions
Leads such a lonely life
I don’t mean to come on like a
Silk smokescreen, no nothing like that
I’m just a nervous cat
Looking at a photostat
Dirty shot of you, I hold up and I
Try to feel the light pour through
All shades are blue
My hands are busy too
No visible sign of weakness, etc.
Have you seen your shadows, baby
Drifting in the wee small hours
In the wee small hours
Oh baby have you seen
No river or vine of healing
Kneeling in a bowl of dust, an abandoned car
Just you and your thirst for knowledge
Knowing knowing nothing never got nobody nowhere
Just you and your drunken shadows
Chopping up the wee small, ow, like a pocketknife
How come each one of those good companions
Leads such a lonely life
NEW BLUE AFTERNOON
Halfway through the circus
The big top caught fire
I opened my eyes again
On the high wire
Nothing left below me
But the sawdust and the bones
Ooh, what a funny feeling
I do yellow, I do red
Was a goldmine in my head
I go to the moon
And I believe it’s a beautiful song
I’d love to singalong on this
New blue afternoon
Lonely fools on horses
Would go riding through the night
This pouring rain
Would give a monsoon a fright
Call it local colour
If you want, I’m sick of bitching
Ooh, what a funny feeling
Ooh, what a funny feeling
And I believe it’s a beautiful song
I’d love to singalong on this
New blue afternoon
RIVER MOUTH
Now you’ve gone and had your cake and ate it
I guess you’ve really had your fill, now here’s the bill
I hope that you can settle it
Otherwise you will face the music, in the pit
Good luck, you’re gonna need it - loads of it
I’ve been waiting for my golden moment
Say I have to pay my dues, no time to lose
Rub me down with a wooden towel
Send me home past the weeping cross, crying now
But I piss more than I drink - mmm, and how
I was born beneath a ten-cent two-cent planet
Never to be worth a note, that’s all she wrote
Just a wily wordpecker from way down south
Tongue enough for two sets of teeth, and a river mouth
Add a black eye to that bottle - and rip them out
BOWLCLEAN McCABE
Whoa oh oh my candy candle
Whoa oh oh and the dripping wax
Whoa oh oh a gentle zephyr wind is blowing in
And I, I, I, right off the tracks
So much water under that bridge
Plenty there for a thirsty person
I don’t plan on drinking it
Ham my driest thing, the fire is lit
Whoa oh oh Bowlclean McCabe
Whoa oh oh take a look at him
Whoa oh oh works with the power of a tidal wave
Whoa oh oh he reaches under the rim
So much water under that lid
Plenty there for a thirsty person
I don’t plan on drinking it
Ham my driest thing, the fire is lit
VLAD HAS WINGS
I drove cholera out of Auckland
I set fire to my sheets
I built a mall and made a small fortune frying eats
I stopped the water from overflowing
I fixed all of the lights
I even won the Nobel Peace Prize once or twice
The hand has fingers
The heart has strings
No blur from a bottom dream’s gonna split on me
Vlad has wings, Vlad has wings
My baby wears a nappy liner
She takes a chance
You oughta get an ocean-liner silkscreened to your pants
Then all the sailorboys and ballast air-hostesses
Could trade you handholds
On their lanyards and their dresses
The hand has fingers, etc.
He’s not bad, he’s not bad x 6
I saved an endangered species
I turned the volume down
Mixing in the newspeakeasy barker-role, in quiet towns
The hand has fingers, etc.
ALIVE, ALIVE
I have a feeling, it’s really reeling
Alive, alive, alive, alive
Here with the moon shining in my room
Don’t take no notice of that darkside jive
Do what you will to stop this hearty engine
It’s like trying to knock down skittles with a pickled onion
I like being alive, alive, alive, alive
Ain’t got no reason at all, who needs a reason
Ah, life is so funny
There goes the real thing, hand in hand with the phony
They could be cousins, they could be kissing
Alive, alive. alive, alive
There could be reasons everybody’s missing
Listen to the bees in that hive - buzz, buzz, buzz
A juicy rhythm, a timeless hope
Hear it beating loudly, you don’t need a stethoscope
I like being alive, alive, etc.
If I could bridge the distance ‘tween my dreams and my existence
I wouldn’t have to count to five
They could be more than cousins, alike as two raisins
And if you need a reason, well, speak to my liaison
Sure nobody asked me my opinion
But I’m alive and that’s no small wonder in this grandiose canyon
I like being alive, alive, etc.
GOLDEN GOOSE
Red, ruby red, is the hair on her head
What a marvellous thing to be alive, she said
Wrapped up in the blankets on her bed
Urged by her blessing, I lifted my leg
Feeling free to deposit a golden egg
Rest assured, we’ll never have to beg
Then a branch breaks through her window
Feathers fly, the icey wind blows
Suddenly a car stops, she crouches on the floor
Footsteps on the gravel leading to her door
Sound moves like a bullet to her core
Run or you’ll be trapped and taken prisoner by those men
I can’t survive the act of losing you again
Take this lock of hair and flee, my friend
I burst through her broken window
Bleeding while the icey winds blow
Red, ruby red, is the hair on her head
And I search for her still though I know she’s dead
Here they cut her, here she fell and bled
Under my wing is the remnant of her hair
Such a frivolous thing made incredibly rare
I treasure it with sadness, love and care
No thing stirs outside her window
No tree grows, no icey winds blow