"Davy means business, baby."
"Work hard, play hard, get plenty of roughage in your diet and someday you will own this hotel."
"Aww,Look what'cha did-you made 'im cry!"
"Languish,languish."(Princess Gwen)
"He'll never make it through this intense bombardment. Nobodycould."
"You're the only one qualified"
Mayor: Mr.Nesmith....? Mike: "Nishwash"
"Defending my honor, isn't tha groovy? A bunch of long-haired wierdos and some viscious people!"
"My clothing is radioactive."
"Oooh, I bet you're a real swinger when you're turned on"
Mike: "1-2-3-4- sit and kiss" lady: but the music has stopped! Mike: "Well, who needs music?" *sigh*
"Either this is the cause of all your trouble or I'm getting my hands dirty for nothing"
"Well, he just may never make that plane!"
Mike: "Hi, where you going?" Davy's Grandpa:England Mike: "Fine, we'll take the freeway"
"My clothing is radioactive."
"For every bight light, there is a broken heart." (*sigh*)
Millie: "Food should not be eaten with the fingers." Mike: "The fingers should be eaten separately."
"First we'll escape- then we'll play baseball."
"Uh, miss- there's a bed in the wall!"
"Winged tubbies frolic near the power steering"
"Yeah, babe, and fish swim."
"They Call me El Nesmith-o, The bandit without no.. without any con-science."
"Man,you'd better shave, they'll never let you into Disneyland like that."
"Something came and kissed me and it caused my mind to blush"
"Fish ate my furniture."
"Hey now wait a minute!"
"I've been working for you for 25 years you jump through the hoop!"
"Hold on I'll handle this.....How can we give you money we dont have??"
"Play magic fingers!"
"Micky 'James Brown' Dolenz!"
"The world's best looking midget, Davy Jones!"
"Save the Texas prarie chicken!"
Mike: "My heart wants you and, my soul wants you." Lady: "Well, what do you hear from your liver?" Mike: "Not much."
"I tape nalmac plates to my forehead."
Mike:"They haven't seen it yet, okay, now they've sighted it. There's a better shot of it. There. There it is, over the hill. Now he's got it! The kid's got it!" Some guy:"What is it?" Mike:" Infinite Rider On The Big Dogma."(Elephant Parts)
"Can I have a coff a cuppie?" (Elephant Parts)
"Ballo, ballo, ballo, ballo, ballo bah." (Elephant Parts)
"See that cha do" (Head)
"But somethin's funny 'bout the gasoline prices." (Elephant Parts)
"Two million girls madly in love with him and he's gonna marry an old man."
"Gettin' better on my 3" (Dance, Monkee, Dance)
"You can't send a boy to do a man's bogde, uh , job bodge,job, you can't send a boy to do a man's..." ( Dance, Monkee, Dance)
"Stop objecting! You'll live longer."
"They shot our golf cart"
"Guess I better go warn the cow"
guy: "Where's she going?" Mike: "I give up, where?"
"Yeah, a lot of ego hang-ups, I got a few ego hangers..."
"I save girls' lives every day. Jump up in the morning, do calisthetics, and save girls' lives."
"I am the regular llama and if I can help you, you can call me regular"
"Well, he's not singing with his voice, he's singing with his feet"
"Come on Micky there's nothing wrong with your voice" Peter: "Are you kidding? Have you ever heard him sing?"
"And if you think that was somethin, you should see what happens after the comercial." (From the Frodis caper)
"Wait, I got it! We'll do what any other town would do - the most logical thing - we'll have a medieval fair!" (Monkees mind the manor)
chick: "Quick, suck it before the venom reaches my heart." Mike: "What heart?"
"Oh wow, is it scary down here. Boy I'm glad your with me Mick, I sure would be scared if I's all alone. Mick? Mick? Oh Boy! (yells) Micky!! Davy!! P-Peter!! (echos) Mike, Mike ,Mike!"
(mouthes)"Rob Roy Fingerhead?!?"
"Hey, Towncryer Baby. What's happening?"
"It isn't my opinion that the people are intending"
"Can I have a marnangrita for my wife's fire?" (Elephant Parts)
"Wait a minute, you dingbat! Who's gonna feed the goldfish?"(Princess Gwen)
"Oh, merciful heavens!"
"Rated Y...No one admitted." (from Elephant Parts)
"With my paranoia I need this abuse."
"Don't do that"
"Come on big fella."
"Come on guys everyone loves rock n roll."
"You're ugly. You're an ugly person! Ugly, ugly, ooh are you "Well dumb ass me!" (Rhino CD release of "HEAD")
"When it rains, you get wet...if you live in a parking lot."
"Order in the court, order in the court. I find the defendant guilty. Guilty, guilty, guilty!"
"Stop. You almost dropped his mother."
"Davy, be good."
ugly!! ...Nobody likes you, least of all me....Take that!"
Man: "Take this Wizard Glick!" Mike: "Oooh..Guhhh .......Who?" Man: "Wizard Glick." Mike: "Man, I'm not Wizard Glick!" Man: "Oh, you're not?" Mike: "Of course I'm not Wizard Glick!"
"A cigarette?...Oh this is not one of your standard brands!" Micky: "Oh, an el zoomo!"(from Head)
"He better, the money says so."
"Due to a lack of interest, tomorrow was cancelled."
"It's 7:30, 6:30 central time. Time for the Monkees. I wonder if anyone around here has a television set?"
"Ok, you think they call us plastic now babe just wait I get finished telling 'em how we do it."
"Well if we can't find the crooks why don't we get the crooks to find us?"
"Make me a success."
"I know my consti...Ohhh. Constitutional rights"
"O.K. men...mission: ridiculous!!!"
Peter
Lady: "I grow impatient!" Peter: "I grow daffodils!"
"They call me El Torko, The bandit...without a neekname."
"It can't be you every week Davy"
"You're doing better Micky, but let me lead"
"You know, I don't see what you guys are so upset about. Here we are in the home of some perfectly awfully sweet people, a man and his niece who just happen to keep bats in the living room."
"Hhmm, Davy is training, Micky went to go see his Aunt and Mike is buying dog food...I think I'll go see April!
"I'm not even good by Proxy."
"The winner and the new champine is da' monkees"
"I don't wanna be president."
"I was rereading Hamlet the other day. It's about this Danish prince."..."And then the queen drinks the poison and then she dies."
"I read an interesting music about books and politics...That's very interesting."
"I once got some threatening valentines."
"You guys can be like brothers to her."
"Is it true that there are no two fingerprints alike in the world."
"He gets more girls that way."
"Hey! Mike's a songwriter!"
"And on my charming and delightful is the left moderate Micky Dolenz."
Micky:"We can't take him anywhere." Peter: "Yes you can, you brought me here."
"Don't call me Mister, I'm just a kid!"
"Am I being clear? For where there is clarity, there is no choice. And where there is choice, there is misery. But why should I speak, since I know nothing."
"And they call me El Torko, the bandit without a nickname."
Man: "When you think of a Gypsy you think of a dancer." Peter: "I think of Ethel Merman!"
Some Guy:"They gotta have knowledge of the seven seas." Pete:"Atlantic, uh, Pacific, Arctic, Antarctic, uh, Baltic, Mediterranean, North, Indian, uh, Lake Habisoo, and uh, the Mississippi." Micky:"Boy, Pete. You sure know how to use your mouth."
"What no cookies?"
"Boy, am I ever doing nothing."
"At least someone appreciates good cooking"
"I dont know, youre guess is as good as mine!!"
"Talk about police brutality."
"He laided a hand on me."
"Why don't we open a prison??"
"What a time to be caught without a turtleneck!"
"Oh, but I love fortune cookies."
"What kind of people have you got comming up here senior citizens visiting their grandparents?"
"Oh, this isn't a good place to snoop -- i'm going to the playground tosnoop"
"Mm, but you'll listen now. Now that it's too late."
Micky:"Come on Peter" Peter: "'Come on Peter'. Before it was 'Shut up Peter' and from you, 'Don't be rude, Peter' ."
Micky:"Do you recognize this man?"Pete:"Is this a trick question?"
"Guilty? Guilty? Guilty?"
"dirty commie"
"I'd like a pair of maracas.(man hands him yellow maracas) Got any in red? Man: They're yours, for six dollars. Davy: Aw, I only have 50 cents. Man: They're yours".
Lady:"Who was the 8th president of the United States of America?" Pete:"I'm afraid I don't know that."Lady:"The boss isn't here and a sound like a nice guy.I'll let you know his last name Van..."Pete:"Van Johnson"Lady:"No."Pete:"Van Heflen"Lady:"No!"Pete:"Which one's wrong,Van or Heflen?"Lady:" Van is right, it's his last name."Pete:"Moving Van!"Lady:"No"Pete:"Pickup Truck!"Lady:"His first name is Martin"Pete:"Dean Martin!"Lady:"Martin ... Van..."Pete:"Martin Van Buren!"
"This one tooth has been acting up lately but the dentist said he could file it down and put a temperary crown on it."
"This game isn't any fun!"
Lady:"Alright, all I need is your name." Pete: "Oh, could you give me a hint?"
Newsperson:"Have you exercised?" Pete:"No, It's too complicated."
"Aye, aye. Aye, aye. Aye aye Sir."
"It was cloudy. I couldn't see if the sun went down."
Mike: "You know, we haven't worked in a month?" Peter: "Gee, it seems more like four weeks!"
"Are you the uh...maintenece man too?"
"Well it all depends on the equalization of ratios!"
"She called me a sissy!"
"A loaf of whine, a jug of bread..."
"What do I know, Im just a kid!"
"This is picture of my wife" Jed "that thar is a coyote" Peter "Oh hehe this is the picture of my wife!" Jed "that thar is a bear" Peter "well, it gets lonely in the hills"
"My name is Peter...ya' dig...Pete"
"You know that? While there is a great deal of moral purpose on the side of the unions they do tend to want a strangle hold. "I'm suffering for my art"
"He gets more girls that way!"
"But I dont wanna be president!"
"Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh moan, groan, ohhhhhhhh!"
"It's perfect!! My system is perfect!!!! I've got it!!!!!!!"
"When I was very young, I used to be emarrassed about kissing.But now I can talk very openly about... S-E-X."
"Oh, I wouldn't say that, we all have loved ones you know."
"Miiiiiiiikkkkee!"
"Nodbody but Frogman!"
"Kretch"
"Lucky guess...I guess."
"It always points to Davy..."
"You'll never get me to speak!"
"Muahahahaha- go fish!"
Peter (in english accent): "You must be joking!" Davy: "Hey that's my line!" Peter (still in english accent): "I'm sorry."
"We're here to take over this town and win all the money."
"I'm the dummy Micky. I'm always the dummy."
Peter: "Hey guys, we're too young to be behind a bar." Micky: "Well go out there." Peter: "That's what I said, we're just fine where we are."
"When you're the photographer you can take pictures of what you want to take pictures of, when I'm the photographer I'll take pictures of what I want to take pictures of."
Man: "What do you think about demonstrations? " Peter: "They're the only way to sell a vaccum cleaner."
"Don't quit before the miracle."
"SHAZAM!! Well, that's another 7 years bad luck for captainmarvel."
"Oh, I don't think your guilty! I just don't see how you could possibly be innocent."
"Is it true that there are no two glove prints alike in the world?"
"You can't step on a spider. It'll rain."
"Cross at the green, not in between."
"Hello, Urgent An-answering ferver, er servi - uh fervent, ferver is our ser- uh, service is our bu... uh, business is our, uh, fingers in the city, uh ... Hello?"
"Oh, I can't tell you that."
"Nobody ever lends money to a man with a sense of humor."
"I'd put my arm in the fire for Micky."
"Brute!"
"And here's the kicker! All: They're gonna tear down a parking lot to build a parking lot!"
"I have loved you from a far low these many moons!"
"You can't do this to me! I need love, and understanding! My mother rejected me! My sister resented me! I've lost all confidence! And now...this operation." (awe!)
"Don't fly don't fly,don't fly.If you get too close to the sun your wings'll melt!"
"I've been able to read since I was 15 years old"
"I think I'll have a look around. (rotates) Instant portrait. Not bad."
"Who turned on the dark?"
Micky
"I said a safe place, Ruby."
"Who said our means have to be visible?!" (From the ABC Special)
"Never mind the furthermore, the plea is self-defense."
"My Childrean! My Childrean!"
"How would you like a pinch in the mouth?"
"I can't think with this lightbulb over my head."
"Do you realise you have a monkee on your back?"
"They also have insufferable torches here on Earth. And whenever a pussy cat cries....they TEAR OFF ITS HEAD!!! Then they holler in its ear. Then they put the head back on. I don't know how it stays alive."
"I've told Davy a thousand times, man, stop hangin' around with vampires!"
"Arrghbrryesnowhyhowcomegozapwowupdownmorelessarrgh"
"I don't even like him that much."
"Cause I'm a mean little girl."
"How will you ever be president if you don't chew your food?" "My favorite color is invisible."
"My mommy won't let me play with toys that burn or bash, orscratch, or go boom."
"A brilliant idea....a brilliant idea....that's what we need....a brilliant idea."
"Now Peter, we're gonna try to scare ya'-so don't be scared!"
"It's perfect. That little wave of hair and that little green hat sitting casually cocked apon his head."
"Y'know how hard it is to find purple flowers these days?"
"I don't like it! Paint it red!"
"Isn't that dumb."
Micky:"Hi, my name is Captain Ahab and I've sailed the seven seas in search of the great white whale, Moby Dick. Have you seen him?" Davy:"No." Micky:"Well, if you see him, tell him I'll be in my cabin."
Micky:"Hey! That little guy looks like Davy." Pete:"It is Davy." Micky:"Yah."
"Man that went out with Judy Garland and Mickey Rooney Movies"
"Careful Ruby, my pourcelin crowns."
"Mike: El Dolenzo what are you doing? Micky: Iım just trying to mingle."
"Is Gary Cooper chinese?" (MIKE:) "No" (MICKY) "Then we're being followed!"
"I'll jabber the seeber."
"Thats right- I showed up for the showdown."
to Babbit: "The boys think the world of you. Why, they were just talking about you before you came in. What's a bloodsucker?"
"Please, no fawning. Why must they always fawn?"
"Hey! I was pretty good! I scared myself even."
"Badges?!! We don't need no steenking badges!!"
"Little joke... 'bout that big."
"We want to join forces with you. We want to ride down the hills, into villages. Right into the mouths (?) shooting and killing and riding on horses!"
"Love is the ultimate trip"
"I have to tell him to sell short before the short changes his mind.."
"You are a blaggart!"
"Throw it out the midnight!"
"Did you see last train to morrocoville?"
"Will the real David Jones, please stand up?"
"Not the pie in the face trick again?"
"Yeah I did put my clothes on, but my clothes took off... Could it be my clothes are putting *ME* on??"
"We're replacements"
"Yah psychadelic, freakout"
"Very psychadelic"
Man:"what's a long haired wierdo?" Micky:"It's a local fish."
"I'm gonna be a stharrr!"
I've walked for 10,000 miles through burning dands and seserts"
But if we don't change into out secret identity the whole television audience will be doomed!"
"Never trust the calvary!"
"You know, how sometimes you pretend like you're a warewolf?"
"Gosh-a-rooney!"
"You've heard of the New York Stock Exchange, well, he owns the New Tork Stock Exchange."
(Chanting)"Nahmi yo ho ringi quo - it's working, it's working" "Mike: "How do you know, How do you know?" Micky "I saw the last scene, I saw the last scene"
"Age only matters if you're cheese"
Lady:Where were you born? Mickey: In the far, mystical city of Shanghei. Lady: Really? Micky: no I lied. Burbank.
"all the kids said noooooo..piss off!!!!" (well I never remember him saying this!)
"what are you doing sitting here all tied up with a gag out of your mouth?"
"early to bed and early to rise!"
"I'm George Michael Dolenz, Peter Torks soliciter!"
"Wot? Clean hands???!!!"
"special delivery!" (from lovebug)
" Sorry man I have this hang up with my feet"
"I got this hang up with my hands, too"
"WOW look at the size of that lens!!"
Man: Wait, use the secret exit. It's through the harp. Micky: I coulda sworn it was through the accordian.
"Oh sh*t...you scared me to death!" (from Justus)
"I'm the 23 hour doorman, i used to be the 24 hour doorman but i couldn't ake the long hours."
Davy: "He's been out in the sun too long." Micky:"he was no bargain in the shade"
"He has six fingers on that hand"
Man: "Three guys to tune one piano?" Micky:"Well, he does the black keys, and he does the white keys, and I do the cracks."
"Oh, baby, it's gonna be my biggest one yet. Three years in the making. 740 cast members. 350 crew members. And 22,000 extras." Man:" What was your greatest expense?" Micky:"Coffe and doughnuts."
"HaHaHa, if that's way you feel about you know of a good restaurant?"
) Woman:"I understand you young men would like you're tealeaves read." Micky:"Oh no, I'm gonna bring mine home." Davy"Why?" Micky:"It'll give me somthing to read in bed."
"But it sure keeps your foot tapping. Don't it?"
"He's probably very kind to dumb animals."
Mike:" We're just gonna play spin the bottle. You know the regular old party game where you spin the bottle and whoever the bottle points to gets a kiss." Micky:"Who get's the bottle?"
"Fight it big Peter!"
"You're too close to your mother."
"We're being invaded by martians!"
"Man, that's justice for you. Here we are trying to get in to see him. And he's out trying to find another group that isn't even trying."
"I am not acting strange I am acting perfectly normal there is nothing strange about me"
"well we were thinking about Last Train To Portrait..uh I mean...."
" at least we know the murderer is neat"
"And now from the elegant pumproom high over Chicago asking that musical question..."
"We can be the worlds first throw up band. Y'know...hey hey we're the monkees....people say we BELCH... kids'll love it" - Micky ABC Special
"They call me El Dolenz-eo, de Bandeet without a soul!"
"If you get lost, I'll be a single..badum..here I come, walking down the street. I get the funniest looks from all the people I meet. Hey hey I'm a Monkee..."
"Sock it to me! Sock it to you! Sock it to everybody!"
"The British are coming, the British are coming... over to my house for a party tonight!"
"Isn't this fun."
Micky: "Uh, don't do that!" Scientist:"Why not?" Micky: "Uh, his pants'll fall down...yeah."
"I consider the theater a moral, and so do all of my wives."
"Man that went out with Judy Garland and Mickey Rooney movies."
"Come lets go I gotta get married, Duh Ellie May's gotta get married. Duh, Duh"
"I myself am deeply jealous!"
DAVY: "I hate goodbyes." Micky: "Okay, Welcome to America Davy"
(David:) "Would you care for a spot of tea?" (Micky:) "I'd rather have a whole cup."
(Farmer:) "It's Tuesday morning..." (Micky:) "Huh? It feels like Monday night."
"pshaw"
"Really Neat"
"I'm deaf, I-I can't hear.....come back!!!"
"Wow, what a great looking cardboard box!" (Mijacogeo)
"your the scum that killed my father!"
"But Sire, this is but a poor Inn and we don't have such things." (Knight Harold) "Well then, send out for sandwiches." (Micky) "Right, sandwiches,yeah."
"These are the bones of the elephant man. And THESE are the bones from the Invisible man. AND THIS is the transmition from the Monkeemobile." (From ABC Special)
"My mother used to call me googoo eyes."
"Last time I saw him he was in the john...er...comfort room"
"No, Tony, I was a has been. Now I'm an AM IS!"
"You do and I'll be sorry!"
"My canteen was empty-for once it was full..."
Woman: "If you leave he'll punish the entier town!" Micky: "Baby if I don't leave he's gonna punish my entire body!"
"I love you twice as much on Friday cause I want the weekend off!"
Davy
"I AM standing up!!"
"Should I deliver this message?-Call Zeldababy-love,love,love-urgent."
"You must be joking!"
"No! I'm Ethel Merman!" (from ABC special)
"One more remark like that and I'll hit ya wit me purse!!"
"'Ello love!!"
"We was shootin' a movie. Some cat came up 'n said 'You wanna shoot a movie?' Said 'Yeah we'll shoot a movie". So we shot a movie."
"He's in garbage disposal"
"A man in love has the strength of thousands!"
"The next time I take off could you check the tower for ground clearance, please?"
"If you stop showing The Monkees, I'm going to hold my breath til my face turns blue!"
"I look very much like my uncle. His pictures in Post Offices all over the country."
"Let us seek a little moment of comfort in our hour of sorrow."
"Holy frog's legs, that really makes me mad!"
"Are you out of your mind????????"
"Are you out of your birds?"
"Tell the court room, in my own words, the pain this has caused you."
Davy:"Please, not the galley, please! Not the galley, please don't hang me, don't hang me." Micky:"No, not the gallows, the galley." Davy:"Oh, you had me frightened there for a minute."
"Y'know...I dont blame him meself. Now, who wants an act wit a fuzzy 'eaded, mute 'arpist, an italian wit a wierd lookin' felt hat, & another guy wid a long nose, a moustache & a smelly cigar? Y'know, its not commercial. I wouldnt buy the act, I wouldnt buy it.
"Oh, April, APRIL!!"
"Don't mean it....don't get excited man, just because I'm short, I know."
"Your a nailbiter.. Your a nailbiter, and your mother never, ever loved you."
"So why are you doing stuff, with this thing and all dat?"
"I think your making all this up!"
"I would of called back Millie."
Micky-"Do the same thing. Davy-" Same thing right, yeah." Man-"That's pretty good."
"Mike, Mike, oh help me Mike!"
"Let's try it on for size."
"That's right, what of it?"
"Are you ready love? Could we go to a resterant? You know it's been 3 days and nobody's fed me!"
"What do ya know, wrong show."
"Its going to be nice working here all quiet and peaceful."
"Ya' know, I think he's rather tall me-self."
"He knows me he knows me! Wait...I'm Davy not Micky."
"He's crazy- they're all crazy..."
"We're stuck in this big black box. You're telling me to calm down, and you're telling me that it dosen't matter. Well I'll tell you something, it matters to me. You wanna get out of this box, I'll show you how to get out of this box!"
"Come on chaps, let's ave at it! Up and over!!"
"He probably loves his mother."
) Which proves more than ever, it's not how you play the game. It's whether you win or lose."
Davy: "mike, I just saw a fella talkin' to a popcicle!" Mike: "Oh yeah...well let me know if the popcicle talks back!"
"It's 'cuz I'm short, that's why they're doin it."
"Why don't these things happen to Peter Tork?"
"Merci, Mon Capitan. And now, in gratitude, we must play."
"You're pretty tough with a fist in your hand."
"Wait a minute..one more thing. Who's got their hand on my bum?"
cat: "so..you wanna go around cruising for chics?" Davy "..no"
man: "Im going to turn you into a boxing champion!!" Davy: "Oh, thats nice, yeah..."
"'E's worse than before!"
"You couldn't teach a dog to do that! You can only train elephants!" "You know what I saw in there? an eye, man! ...an eye this big, blood red! It was as clear as the nose on your face!"
guy: "Why does the camel sleep with one eye facing the desert moon?" Davy: "To keep his pants up?"
"And Ruben the tadpole!"
MAN: "Youıre a good boy!" DAVY: "Thank you very much. Can I have a cookie?"
"So what is this thing you're doing with this stuff and all that?"
"Comfortable? I'm very rich!"
"Now how can a dog sound like a horse?"
Mike:"What is this up, up, and away business?" Davy: "I wanna fly." Mike:"Why are you gonna fly? The restaurant is just half a block down." Davy: "Well, I guess we'd better walk then atten we?"
"red maraccas"
"there goes that bell again."
"Nash baby"
"You can't do that it's against naval law!"
"Oh not the galleys please not the galleys!"
"He's gone crackers"
"I'm to young to dye and to young to get married"
"He already KNOWS about us, it's the HORSE we've got to hide"
"What do you think this is!? Chopped liver!?"
"I love you, Clarese!" (Clarese)- "I don't care!"
"Don't do that."
Davy:"I had to fight my way out of the slums." Mike:" But Davy' you were raised in a residential area!" Davy:"Alright then I had to fight my way out of the residential area."
"Hark! I hear a knock apon yon door!Ohh!"
"Go toe go - sock it to me baby - that was a pun"
"Monkey's paw, monkey's paw - I can't find it anywhere" Girl: "I think you spell it with a y" Davy: Really? I always thought you spelled it with two e's"
MIKE:"You know, I never realised you could get so hungry saving your country." DAVY: "I come from England and I'm hungry."
GIRL:"The fastest way to a woman's heart is through her mind." DAVY: "You know, I never would of thought of that route."
"That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard in me life."
"I'd like a glass of cold gravy with a hair in it, please."
Since John Lennons Birthday!!