VENTRUE: Thank you all for attending. I again call the council to discuss yet ANOTHER problem we are having with our... "youth."
TOREADOR: You have our undivided attentions, as usual. Please, go on.
[RAVNOS makes wet ass-kissing sounds and a roll of gypsy eyes. MALKAV grabs him by the cheeks and kisses him fully on the mouth.]
RAVNOS: GAH!!! [Spits and runs after MALKAV who takes off sprinting.] I will kill you, dilo bastard!
VENTRUE: ENOUGH!! [Stands.] Ravnos, PLEASE be seated. Malkav. [Points.] Over there... Next to Brujah.
[BRUJAH smiles and pats the seat next to him causing MALKAV to eep.]
VENTRUE: As I was stating before the OUTBURST... [Dirty look to MALKAV.] We have yet another problem. The children know we have our flaws to separate us, but they want to know our strengths as well. So... I have taken the liberty to...
GANGREL: [Growls.] You hook me up like you did with the flaws and you are gonna take your liberties to the hospital little man.
VENTRUE: [Coughs and nods.] Of... course... Gangrel... Shall we start with you?
[GANGREL folds her arms and gives the stare that all men, dead or alive, fear from women.]
VENTRUE: Ahem... ahh yes... [Rustles papers.] Gangrel... I to you... Grant the abilities of your animal nature. Growing claws at will, changing into animal form at will... Even becoming the mists of night themselves. [Swallows.] Acceptable?
GANGREL: It's a start. I still owe you for the pig's tail...
VENTRUE: Moving right along... Malkav... I grant you... the power of Dominate, you may control the minds of your--
BRUJAH: ARE YOU OFF YOUR GOD DAMNED ROCKER? Giving HIM the ability to control OTHERS?? We'll all end up as demented as he is!
VENTRUE: Dementia? Instilling insanity in others?
MALKAV: Deal. Done. Thank you, drive thru.
[BRUJAH cringes and shakes his head.]
VENTRUE: I'm... not... sure what just... happened... Malk? I was?
MALKAV: Moving on to Toreador.
VENTRUE: [Shakes his head and nods.] Yes... um... Toreador. Because of your beauty, and apprication of... your perfect social skills, and untouchable elegance, I give you the ability to influence the feelings of others. Inspiring Awe, Fear, Love or Respect in all you wish.
TOREADOR: Wise, just, and kind. Thank you.
BRUJAH: [Makes kissy noises and quickly looks to MALKAV.] You even THINK it and yer pulp Kook.
VENTRUE: Assamite. Due to your... ahem... activities... I chose silence for you. You manipulate sounds, causing the death cries of your victims to be lost with their lives.
ASSAMITE: [Smiles and nods.] Such things are in the blood...
VENTRUE: Brujah... my violent friend. To further... your personality... I give to you unparalleled strength... and speed. May your wrath be as swift and stinging as your temper.
BRUJAH: [Grins at ASSAMITE.] Awww. I wanted to be really quiet!! [Mock sighs.] Guess I have to suffer with strength and speed. [Laughs.]
ASSAMITE: Then suffer in silence.
[BRUJAH's laughter stops as his sounds are abruptly cut off.]
VENTRUE: Um... [Whispers to ASSAMITE.] Should have gave you that a long time ago Assamite. [To all.] Moving on. Tzim... I give to you...
MALKAV: A NEW CLAN NAME!!! Something we can say without sounding like we are sneezing through a mouth full of -- [Goes silent.]
VENTRUE: Thank you Assamite. Ahem. Tzim, you shall have the ability to sculpt and mold flesh and bone, as artists mold clay or shape stone.
TZIMISCE: [Dirty look to MALKAV.] Come here my silent little friend...
[MALKAV lets out a silent shriek as he holds up two fingers in the sign of the cross.]
VENTRUE: Ahem... Nosferatu. I grant you the ability to...
MALKAV: Leap tall buildings in a SINGLE BOUND!
VENTRUE: [Surprised.] I thought you were silenced?
BRUJAH: [Shaking out a sore hand.] Well he has to be CONSCIOUS to do that now doesn't he? [Kicks ASSAMITE before sitting.] Strength and speed. I love it.
VENTRUE: Nos, I grant you the power to be unseen. You may come and go and no one will acknowledge your presence.
BRUJAH: [Laughs.] Oh yeah... Like he gets ALL the acknowledgement in the world right now... A real chick magnet.
NOSFERATU: Accepted, thank you, Ventrue. [To BRUJAH.] Why on earth would I want to attract other women?.
BRUJAH: [Pales.] You... are... a... Oh god... I'm gonna be sick...
GIOVANNI: [Scootches closer to NOSFERATU.] Sooo... what are you doing aft--
VENTRUE: Giovanni. You are given, power over the dead. The truly dead. All that fester and rot are in your domain.
BRUJAH: Ugh... so you DO have a chance with Nos. [Looks at VENTRUE.] Man... can you imagine if... [Leans in, whispering to VENTRUE, who pales, then looks ill.]
VENTRUE: Thank you for that lovely image Brujah. I will be sure to send you my therapy bill. Ravnos...
Ravnos: [Looks startled then sheepish.] Sorry... [Hands VENTRUE his wallet.]
VENTRUE: No... I... [Shakes his head and snatches the wallet back.] I know I am going to regret this... but I give you the power of trickery. Your illusions, jokes, and general mischief shall fool not only the eyes, but all senses.
MALKAV: Yeah. I'M the crazy one... [Looks at the stirring ASSAMITE and punches him in the jaw.] I'm gunna knock you out! Mama said knock you out. I'm gunna take this iddy biddy world by storm and I'm just... urnk..
BRUJAH: [Shakes off his fist.] Strength. And Speed. GOTTA love it.
VENTRUE: Lasombra. Yes... you over in the poorly lit corner. Your ability shall be mastery of the shadows and the dark. With it... [Blinks.] Where did he go?
VOICE OF LASOMBRA: Accepted. Gladly.
MALKAV: [Groggily and weakly.] Carolanne... stay away from the light... [Thunks back to the table.]
VENTRUE: Um... yes. Tremere. Given your studies... you are given the ability to create magic. Casting cantrips and using your powers as you see fit.
TREMERE: But I already have---
VENTRUE: And last but not least, myself.
BRUJAH: [Warily.] Best for last? What do you get?
VENTRUE: I get the mastery of mind control. With it I shall lead us, holding both meetings, and the majority of offices. Any one who objects, please try to raise your hands
[Everyone struggles to lift stubborn limbs that refuse to obey.]
VENTRUE Very nice. Meeting... adjourned.