Lightbulb Jokes for the World of Darkness
Vampire: The Masquerade
How many Brujah does it take to change a lightbulb?
The Brujah have never changed anything and never will
How many Malkavians does it take to change a lightbulb?
Fish!
How many Malkavians does it take to change a lightbulb?
Just one, but it will be put in sideways.
How many Nosferatau does it take to change a lightbulb?
Let me get this straight, you WANT to see me?
How many Toreador does it take to change a lightbulb?
Fifty-one - one to change the bulb, fifty to go on the guest list
How many Tremere does it take to change a light bulb?
Four - One to write a letter to Vienna asking for permission, a second to change the light bulb, a third to copy all of the second's work and a fourth to take credit for it.
How many Ventrue does it take to change a lightbulb?
None - we get a mortal to do it for us
How many Ventrue does it take to change a lightbulb?
One. "You WILL change the light bulb."
"I will change the light bulb."
"You WILL forget I was ever here."
"I will forget you were ever here."
How many Assamites does it take to change a lightbulb?
One, but he can only take it out. *BLAM*
How many Daughters of Cacophany does it take to change a lightbulb?
Laaaaaaaaaaaaah! *tinkle smash*
How many Gangrel does it take to change a lightbulb?
*eyes glow red*
How many Giovanni/Cappodocians does it take to change a lightbulb?
It's more use to us dead!
How many Giovanni does it take to change a light bulb?
We don't do light bulbs, but we can get you one... for a nominal fee.
How many Lasombra does it take to change a light bulb?
Actually, the light hasn't burnt out; that's just Obtenebration.
How many Salubri does it take to change a light bulb?
One, he just uses Obeah and it's all better.
How many Samedi does it take to change a light bulb?
Four - One to rot the old one out, one to put the new one in, and two to summon and control the spirit of the old one.
How many Settites does it take to change a lightbulb?
We'll just sit here in the dark, thanks
How many Tzimisce does it take to change a lightbulb?
Into what?
Werewolf: The Apocalypse
How many Garou does it take to change a lightbulb?
Just one, but they'll never get it changed in time.
Two - One to change it, and a Gaillard to write a song exaggerating the legendary task.
How many Black Furies does it take to change a lightbulb?
Black Furies'll change EVERYTHING!
How many Bone Gnawers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Well, they're really good at getting light bulbs, but they're usually all burned-out.
How many Children of Gaia does it take to change a lightbulb?
Use candles maaan... they don't have Wyrm in them
How many Children of Gaia does it take to change a light bulb?
As many as possible, with a big group hug afterwards.
How many Fianna does it take to change a lightbulb?
Fuck it, we kin drink in the dark!
How many Get of Fenris does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two-hundred and one - one to hold the bulb and two hundred to tear down the wall.
How many Glass Walkers does it take to change a lightbulb?
You think I'm throwing away a Fetish?
How many Red Talons does it take to change a lightbulb?
DIE WEAVER THING DIE!
How many Shadowlords does it take to change a lightbulb?
No lightbulbs, we cannot plot properly with lightbulbs
How many Silver Fangs does it take to change a lightbulb?
What's wrong with the way things are now?
How many Silent Striders does it take to change a light bulb?
Why would they bother? They don't stay around long enough for it to matter to them anyway.
How many Stargazers does it take to change a lightbulb?
To replace the light without, one must renew the light within.
How many Uktena does it take to change a light bulb?
One to keep everyone else away while the others... Let's just say it gets screwed in and leave it at that!
How many Wendigo does it take to change a lightbulb?
Get out of Canada and take your useless Weaver-thing with you!
Mage: The Ascension
How many Mages does it take to change a lightbulb?
None - coincidentally, it was just switched off
How many Sons of Ether does it take to change a lightbulb?
None - that's Igor's job
Wraith: The Oblivion
How many Wraiths does it take to change a lightbulb?
One... If they could only touch it...
How many Artificers does it take to change a lightbulb?
What's wrong with the one I'm living in now?
How many Monitors does it take to change a lightbulb?
What's wrong with the Fetter you've got now?
How many Masquers does it take to change a lightbulb?
Change who into a lightbulb?
Changeling: The Dreaming
How many Changelings does it take to change a lightbulb?
One, but the new one will make funny coloured lights.
Have any to add? Send them to apathygrrl@ijustdontcare.com
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