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Princess and Crisis are backstage in Princess’s office.
Crisis: So anyway, now that the DCW merger is off, and DCW is rising right back to the top, I can’t really run a show. I’ll be more than happy to help out with any backstage needs. What do you want me to do?
Pandora: Well, I was planning on running everything ANYWAY. I’ll tell you what. You’ve got the power to make matches, if you see fit. If there is some match up of wrestlers you are dying to see don’t hesitate to make the match.
Crisis: So what... I’m like the commissioner?
Pandora: I guess, in a way. Sort of. But I’ll still run everything.
Crisis: News flash. Your a seventeen year old girl. You can’t run an entire wrestling promotion.
Pandora: Watch me.
Show Intro
Peace Sells... By Megadeth plays, as clips of ICW stars are shown.
“What do you mean, "I don't believe in God"?
I talk to him every day.”
[Jeebus is shown smashing Ritter with a barbed wire covered cross]
What do you mean, "I don't support your system"?
I go to court when I have to.
[A bloody Prime Offender is shown giving the “Crime in Progress” to an equally bloody Shotgun in a “Hell in the Cell”]
What do you mean, "I can't get to work on time"?
I got nothing better to do
[Dragon is shown setting Clint Rezner on fire.]
And, what do you mean, "I don't pay my bills"?
Why do you think I'm broke? Huh?
[Body Breaker is shown being double chokeslamed by Slash and Street Boy, then thrown through a table.]
If there's a new way,
I'll be the first in line.
But, it better work this time.
[Wolf is shown giving Rock-Star Richard Royal a “Rock Bottom”.]
What do you mean, "I hurt your feelings"?
I didn't know you had any feelings.
[Princess Pandora getting married to Body Breaker is shown.]
What do you mean, "I ain't kind"?
I'm just not your kind.
[The X is shown pushing Al Ritter off the top of a cage.]
What do you mean, "I couldn't be president, of the United States of America"?
Tell me something, it's still "We the people", right?
[Mad Dog Briskout in the Hell in a kennel match is shown.]
If there's a new way
I'll be the first in line,
But, it better work this time.
[Hydra smashing a cinder block over Jeebus‘s head is shown.]
Can you put a price on peace?
Peace,
Peace sells...,
Peace,
Peace sells...,
Peace sells...,but who's buying?
[A “bloody” Bloodbath Logo flashes on screen and a HUGE Crackdown logo smashes it like a bug, as the show starts]
Adam Pyre vs. Beerman Billy vs. Rage
Nina Garcia - This match is a Standard Match. Coming to the ring first, Adam Pyre!!!
[Adam Pyre comes down to the ring. ]
Nina Garcia - The second in this three way match, Beerman Billy!!!
[Beerman comes to the ring. ]
Nina Garcia - And third, Rage!!!
[Rage walks down to the ring.]
(ring, ring, ring)
[Adam Pyre kicks Beerman Billy in the stomach. Adam Pyre powerbombs Beerman Billy! Pyre covers Beerman Billy hooking the leg. Referee Eric Huggens makes the count. ...1 ...2 Rage kicks Adam Pyre off of Beerman Billy. ]
Joel - Adam Pyre should have known he wouldn't win the match with that.
[Beerman Billy stands up. Beerman Billy kicks Adam Pyre in the groin. Rage grabs Adam Pyre from behind and plants him with a german suplex. ]
Justin Cole - Adam Pyre on the receiving end of a german suplex from Rage.
[Adam Pyre bites Rage face out of desperation. Adam Pyre pokes Beerman Billy in the eye with his thumb. Adam Pyre hits Beerman Billy with a headbutt to the mid-section. Adam Pyre punches Beerman Billy repeatedly. Rage hits a side suplex on Adam Pyre. ]
Justin Cole - Rage is doing quite well at this point in the match.
Tonner - Rage is playing is smart. He’s waiting for Billy and Adam to tie up, and he takes out the winner.
[Rage bites Beerman Billy's face out of desperation. Beerman Billy jabs Rage. Rage punches Beerman Billy, then Beerman Billy pulls Rage's hair when the ref isn't looking. Rage knife edge chops Beerman Billy. Beerman Billy knife edge chops Rage. Adam Pyre has gotten up from Rage’s suplex. Pyre uses a running lariat to take Beerman Billy down. Adam Pyre with executes a bearhug on Beerman Billy. Pyre turns the Bearhug into an overhead belly to belly suplex.]
Tonner - Great move from Adam Pyre.
[Adam Pyre blocks a punch by Rage, Adam Pyre applies an armbreaker. A koppo kick by Adam Pyre sends Rage to the mat. Rage stands up. Beerman Billy gets back to his feet. Beerman Billy hits Rag from behind. Adam Pyre kicks Beerman Billy in the stomach. ]
Justin Cole - kick!
[Beerman Billy gets back to his feet. Adam Pyre's head pops back from the jab thrown by Beerman Billy. Beerman Billy takes a cheap shot with a kick to the groin. Beerman Billy knife edge chops Adam Pyre. ]
Tonner - Beerman Billy executes a knife edge chop.
[Adam Pyre pulls off a strong power slam. ]
Joel - The World Wrestling Federation is the number on wrestling program on television.
[Adam Pyre clotheslines Beerman Billy. Beerman Billy gets up. Beerman Billy gets thrown into the turnbuckle. Rage comes at him and drills him with the splash. Rage moves and Adam Pyre runs in and crushes Billy with a splash. Adam Pyre turns and hits a stiff high kick to the head of Rage. Adam Pyre executes a neck breaker. Adam Pyre covers Rage. Eric Huggens counts. ...1 ...2 ...3 ]
Justin Cole - We've got ourselves a winner!
Nina Garcia - The winner of this match, Adam Pyre!!!
Wolf is walking backstage. He rounds a corner and bumps into Prime Offender.
Wolf: Hey, PO...
Wolf looks at PO, who has the World Title over one shoulder, and the Canadian Title over the other.
Wolf: World champ again. Nice.
Prime Offender: Yeah, like there was any doubt I was going to win. I still remember the FIRST time I won the belt. I was... against YOU wasn’t it? Wow, that ironic.
Prime Offender and Wolf look at each other.
Prime Offender: Wow. That just got REALLY awkward. I’m outtie like a hot potato. Got things to see and people to do. I’ll check ya latters wolfy.
Prime Offender walks away and Wolf stares after him.
Wolf: Yeah, count on it.
Ryu Yagami vs. Slash
Nina Garcia - This match is a Standard Match. On his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 225 pounds, from Japan a member of International incident., Ryu Yagami!!! (crowd cheers *****)
[Ryu comes down to the ring. ]
Nina Garcia - and his opponent, weighing in at 350 pounds, from Anehiem. California, Slash!!! (crowd cheers **)
[Slash comes to the ring]
[Eric Huggens checks Slash's boots and knee pads.]
(ding, ding, ding)
Justin Cole - Ryu is on the top rope, but Slash dosn’t see him...
Tonner - Turn around Slash!
[Slash turns around and Ryu Yagami executes a ropeflip hiptoss on Slash. Slash gets back to his feet. Ryu goes for the top rope again. Slash runs over, jumps on the top rope with Ryu and tosses him off with a superplex from the top rope. ]
Joel - Slash is very quick for such a big guy.
[Slash uppercuts Ryu Yagami. Ryu Yagami is knocked down by Slash's massive superkick. Ryu Yagami gets up. Ryu Yagami runs to the corner and jumps off of the top turnbuckle with a twisting moonsault, hitting Slash square in the face. Ryu Yagami chants start. ]
Justin Cole - If Ryu Yagami keeps using moves like that twisting moonsault he could win the match!
[Ryu Yagami is up again. Slash is up again. Ryu Yagami hits him with a back fist. ]
Joel - Ryu Yagami executes a back fist.
Tonner - That martial arts background from Ryu is so deadly.
[Ryu Yagami takes Slash down with a knee. Ryu Yagami measures Slash up and drops a closed fist. Ryu Yagami gets up. Slash is back on his feet. Slash executes an airplane spin on Ryu Yagami. Slash is up again. ]
Tonner - That airplane spin made Ryu dizzy, he doesn't know where he is!
[Ryu Yagami hits a koppo kick on Slash. Slash is up again. Ryu Yagami legsweeps Slash. Ryu Yagami executes a corkscrew legdrop on Slash. Ryu Yagami is back on his feet. Slash is up again. Ryu Yagami uppercuts Slash. ]
Justin Cole - Ryu Yagami executes a uppercut.
[Ryu Yagami pins Slash against the ropes and chokes him with his forearm. Ryu Yagami trips Slash up with a single leg takedown. Slash is back on his feet. Ryu Yagami jumps off the turnbuckle with the flying bodypress on Slash. Ryu Yagami gets up. Slash gets up. Ryu Yagami short-arm clotheslines Slash to the mat. ]
Joel - Slash takes a Short-arm clothesline.
[Slash gets up. Ryu locks up with Slash. Slash piledrives Ryu Yagami into the mat. Slash picks up Ryu. Slash choke slams Ryu Yagami. Ryu Yagami looks to be out cold! Slash goes for a pin. Eric Huggens counts. ...1 ...2 ...3 ]
Joel - We've got ourselves a winner!
Nina Garcia - The winner of this match, Slash!!!
Princess Pandora is looking over some papers when there is a knock on the door.
Pandora: (not looking up) Come in.
Dragon comes in. He has a huge Komodo Dragon on a leash.
Princess looks up, sees the Komodo and jumps on her desk.
Pandora: Holy crap what is that?
Dragon: It’s my new, kick ass Komodo Dragon. Cool huh? I’m going to have him eat Kain Highwind.
Pandora: About that... ICW and Kain came to a mutual agreement and we let him out of his contract....
Dragon: What? I get ANOTHER match cancelled on me? Am I EVER going to be allowed to wrestle!??!?
Pandora: Sorry....
Jeebus vs. Shotgun
Nina Garcia - This match is a Standard Match. On his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 200 pounds, from Unknown, Jeebus!!!
[Jeebus comes down to the ring. As Jeebus‘s 20 minute long Type O negative intro is playing, all of the sudden it stops. A noise that sounds like an army marching is heard. Up pops the words “The Concepts“]
Tonner - Whoa, like what is that all about?
Justin Cole - I have no idea... Joel?
Joel - Don’t look at me, I don’t know either....
[In the ring, Jeebus looks upset his intro cut out.]
Nina Garcia - and his opponent, weighing in at 225 pounds, from Unknown, Shotgun!!! (crowd cheers ****)
[Shotgun comes down to the ring.]
Shotgun gives Jeebus the finger.
(ding, ding, ding)
[Jeebus spinning mule kicks Shotgun. ]
Tonner - spinning mule kick!
[Jeebus flies from the turnbuckle with an elbowdrop. ]
Justin Cole - Jeebus executes a elbow drop.
[Jeebus with an Aztecan suplex on Shotgun sends him to the mat. Jeebus twists Shotgun's arm, jumps, and dropkicks Shotgun to the ground. ]
Tonner - Shotgun takes a corkscrew dropkick.
[Jeebus is back on his feet. Shotgun with a gut-wrench suplex on Jeebus. Shotgun is back on his feet. Shotgun applies an octopus strangle hold to Jeebus, the ref doesn't know it, but he's choking Jeebus. Eric Huggens asks Jeebus if he quits. ... Shotgun tightens the hold. ... ... ... Shotgun tightens the hold. Jeebus escapes. Jeebus gets up. Jeebus delivers a short-arm clothesline to Shotgun. ]
Justin Cole - Jeebus took Shotgun down to the mat with that move.
[Now Jeebus standing. Shotgun moves back to his feet. An belly to belly suplex by Shotgun proves to be too much for Jeebus. Jeebus is lying on the mat in pain. Shotgun piledrives Jeebus into the mat. Shotgun executes a piledriver on Jeebus. Shotgun drags Jeebus to the floor. ]
Tonner - If Jeebus or Shotgun could get a weapon it would change the course of this match.
[Eric Huggens starts the count (.1) Jeebus hits Shotgun with a chair. Jeebus rolls Shotgun back into the ring. Jeebus clotheslines Shotgun. Shotgun on the top rope, and Jeebus catches him in a reverse headlock, then drops down into a DDT. Jeebus grabs Shotgun's waist, flips him back in a German suplex, and continues to roll into a bridge. Eric Huggens counts the pin. ...1 ...2 ...3 ]
Justin Cole - We've got ourselves a winner!
Nina Garcia - The winner of this match, Jeebus!!!
Cereal Killer vs. Timberwolf
Nina Garcia - This match is a Standard Match. On his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 225 pounds, from Unknown, Timberwolf!!! (crowd cheers **)
[Timberwolf comes down to the ring. ]
Nina Garcia - and his opponent, weighing in at 245 pounds, from Cereal City, USA, Cereal Killer!!! (crowd boos ***)
[Cereal Killer comes down to the ring!]
[Eric Huggens checks Timberwolf's boots and knee pads. Cereal Killer gets on the turnbuckle and poses for the fans.]
(ring, ring, ring)
[Timberwolf explodes Cereal Killer's back with an excellent spinning backbreaker. Cereal Killer goes for a power bomb but Timberwolf dodges the attack. Timberwolf is reaching for the ropes after Cereal Killer grabs him in a half Boston Crab. Eric Huggens asks Timberwolf if he quits. ... ... ... ... Timberwolf escapes. Cereal Killer and Timberwolf go to the floor Eric Huggens starts the count (.1) ]
Tonner - My God!! What a match!
[(..2) In an attempt to even the match, Cereal Killer rakes Timberwolf's face. ]
Joel - Cereal Killer with a face rake.
[(...3) Timberwolf uses a closed fist on Cereal Killer. A spinning leg lariat by Cereal Killer smashes Timberwolf in the face, knocking him down. Cereal Killer moves back to his feet. Timberwolf climbs to his feet. (....4) (.....5) Cereal Killer takes Timberwolf into the ring. Cereal Killer, avoiding a punch, grabs Timberwolf's arm and gives it an over the shoulder armbreaker. Timberwolf with a cheap thumb to the eye of Cereal Killer. ]
Tonner - Timberwolf executes a thumb to the eye.
[Cereal Killer bites Timberwolf, trying to turn the advantage around. ]
Joel - Timberwolf takes a arm bite.
[Timberwolf tries to even the score with a bite to Cereal Killer's face. ]
Tonner - Timberwolf with a face bite.
[Cereal Killer piledrives Timberwolf into the mat. Timberwolf is back on his feet. A flying shoulder block send Timberwolf to the mat. Cereal Killer moves back to his feet. Timberwolf moves back to his feet. Timberwolf takes Cereal Killer down with a knee. Timberwolf goes for a pin. The ref starts the count. ...1 ...2 Cereal Killer kicks out. ]
Tonner - Not even close!
[Cereal Killer is back on his feet. Timberwolf is whipped to the mat by a Japanese armdrag takedown by Cereal Killer. Cereal Killer covers Timberwolf. Eric Huggens counts. ...1 ...2 Timberwolf escapes. ]
Justin Cole - Cereal Killer almost won the match!
[Cereal Killer jumps from the top and nails Timberwolf with a flying axhandle smash. Timberwolf sets Cereal Killer up on the top turnbuckle, then hooks him up and slams him with a DVD off the top. Timberwolf pins Cereal Killer to the mat. Referee Eric Huggens makes the count. ...1 ...2 ...3 ]
Tonner - Timberwolf has won the match!
Nina Garcia - The winner of this match, Timberwolf!!!
Dragon comes out to the ring with his Komodo Dragon. He ties the Komodo Dragon to the ring post and gets in the ring. He look over at the announce booth.
Justin Cole - I think he wants someone to interview him...
Joel - Hey, don’t look at me, it’s the “new guys” turn.
Tonner - New guy? I’ve been in ICW longer than you!
Joel - Yeah, but your new to the announce team. Go get em “rookie!”
Tonner - Grumble...
Tonner gets up and gets in the ring with Dragon. Tonner has a mic and holds it out for Dragon.
Dragon: I just came out here to get my face on TV. I seems like someone in the front office dosn’t like Dragon and is doing everything possible to bury me on TV. I mean, come on. Lets face facts. When I first came into ICW what did I do? I fought El Phantasmo for two months. Then it got worse from there. I had to fight girls, team up with girls, job to a condom machine, ref some girls matches, set a goth on fire... and now, instead of giving me crap TV time, I don’t get TV time at all! I win the world title and I’m not on TV! I’m not in Angles! I have a match with Wolf and it gets canceled. Tonight, same thing. I had a match, and now its canceled. The TV production here is sub par. The announcing is worse than NWA-TNA... The backst....
Tonner - Whoa, go back. What did you say?
Dragon - My match with Wolf got canceled?
Tonner - No, the part about announcing sucks?
Dragon - Hey, no offence big guy, but you don’t announce any better than you wrestle!
Tonner - Excuse me?
Dragon - Hey come on man. Sorry to say, but the only reason ICW hired you? They saw you in EWF and said “Hey a seven foot Australian guy! That will be good to START.” I mean, sure you held the World Title. But back when there were only ten people in the league. As soon as the good people, like me, started coming in you were exposed for the huge sized fraud that you are. You can’t wrestle. You have NO charisma. You just have a huge body, and long blond hair. That’s the ONLY reason you got a job in ICW.
Tonner - Oh really? I can’t wrestle? [Tonner rips off his shirt.] Come on then! Why don’t you show all these people what kind of fraud I am!
Dragon: Gladly!
Dragon vs. Tonner
(ring, ring, ring)
[Dragon tackles Tonner and pummels his head. Tonner is driven further into the mat by Dragon with a diving elbow smash. Tonner is up again. Tonner whips Dragon into the ropes. Tonner is knocked down to the mat by a strong clothesline by Dragon. Tonner and Dragon go to the floor Eric Huggens starts the count (.1) Tonner hits a tiger driver on Dragon. ]
Justin Cole - Good tiger driver by Tonner.
Joel - On the outside of the ring. That has GOTTA hurt.
[Tonner stands up. (..2) (...3) A big boot by Tonner sends Dragon to the floor. Dragon is up again. (....4) A flying bodypress by Dragon takes Tonner to the floor with authority. Now Tonner standing. (.....5) Tonner and Dragon move back into the ring. Tonner delivers a low blow to Dragon. Now Dragon standing. Flying side kick by Dragon takes Tonner off his feet. ]
Justin Cole - Dragon with a flying side kick.
[Tonner moves back to his feet. Dragon jumps from the top rope and hits Tonner with a flying armdrag. Dragon chants start. Dragon stands up. Tonner with an illegal chokehold on Dragon. Tonner goes for a pin. Eric Huggens counts the pin. ...1 Dragon escapes. ]
Joel - He should have just stayed on the attack.
[Tonner slaps the face of Dragon. Dragon kicks Tonner in the leg, then pulls off a DDT. Dragon gets set on top the turnbuckle then Dragon hits Tonner with a splash. ]
Joel - Nice splash by Dragon.
[Dragon tries to even the match with a flying shoulder block. Dragon gets back to his feet. Dragon stomps Tonner. Dragon covers Tonner hooking the leg. The ref starts the count. ...1 ...2 Tonner escapes. ]
Justin Cole - Dragon should have known he wouldn't win the match with that.
[Tonner is back on his feet. Tonner trys for a big boot but Dragon avoids it. ]
Joel - What an outstanding match!
[A choking sleeper is applies by Tonner to put out Dragon. The ref doesn't see it yet. Eric Huggens asks Dragon if he quits. ... Tonner tightens the hold. ... ... ... Tonner tightens the hold. Dragon escapes. ]
Tonner - What an outstanding match!
[Dragon trys for a vertical suplex but is unable to lift Tonner. Dragon jumps from the second turnbuckle, kicking Tonner in the head, taking him down. Dragon chants start. Dragon runs and bounces off the second rope with a moonsault. A Dragonsault! 1... 2...3!]
Justin Cole - Dragon has won the match!
Nina Garcia - The winner of this match, Dragon!!!
Tonner has to be helped to the back. Dragon comes over with his Komodo Dragon and puts on a headset.
Dragon - Hey, I’m a better wrestler, now I’m a better announcer!
"Mad Dog" Briskout vs. Ant Grist
Nina Garcia - This match is a Standard Match for the UK title. On his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 210 pounds, from Medicine Hat, Alberta, Canada, "Mad Dog" Briskout!!! (crowd cheers **)
["Mad Dog" Briskout comes down to the ring. ]
Nina Garcia - and his opponent, weighing in at 225 pounds, from Unknown, Ant Grist!!! (crowd cheers ******)
[Ant comes down to the ring.]
["Mad Dog" Briskout talks about Ant Grist's mom.]
[Ant Grist taunts "Mad Dog" Briskout.]
(ding, ding, ding)
["Mad Dog" Briskout attempts to kick Ant Grist, but Ant Grist catches his leg. "Mad Dog" Briskout flips around and kicks Ant Grist.]
Joel - "Mad Dog" Briskout with a enzuigiri.
Dragon - That’s showing him Mad Dog.
["Mad Dog" Briskout climbs to his feet. They lockup. "Mad Dog" Briskout sends Ant Grist to the corner of the ring. Ant Grist is brought to the mat with a hiptoss by "Mad Dog" Briskout. "Mad Dog" Briskout is knocked to his back by a Destiny Hammer at the hands of Ant Grist. ]
Joel - Ant Grist with a Destiny Hammer.
Justin Cole - Ant Grist's momma would be proud!
Dragon - Holy shit Cole! Ant stole that move from me! That thief!
[Ant Grist stomps "Mad Dog" Briskout. "Mad Dog" Briskout stands up. "Mad Dog" Briskout with a quick jab to Ant Grist's chin. "Mad Dog" Briskout steps back after Ant Grist slaps him. ]
Joel - slap!
Dragon - Come on Briskout, Ant isn’t anything. You should be able to beat him with ease.
Joel - Hey, dosn’t Ant have like... eight wins over you or something?
Dragon - Shut up Joel...
Joel - To your four wins over Ant....
Dragon - Hey, Joel. Did you see what I did to Tonner?
Joel - Yeah...
Dragon - Do you want me to do that to you?
Joel - No sir...
Dragon - Then SHUT UP.
["Mad Dog" Briskout delivers a spinning backbreaker to Ant Grist. "Mad Dog" Briskout goes for a pin. Referee Don Wolverton makes the count. ...1 ...2 Ant Grist escapes. ]
Dragon - Awe, that’s crap! Slow count! Slow count! Even the REFS suck!
[Ant Grist moves back to his feet. Ant Grist trys for a hotshot (stun-gun) but "Mad Dog" Briskout avoids it. ]
Justin Cole - Briskout a little to fast there!
[Ant Grist pulls out a dirty eye poke to "Mad Dog" Briskout's eye. ]
Joel - Ant Grist with a eye poke.
Dragon - DQ his ass ref!
["Mad Dog" Briskout comes from behind and bulldogs Ant Grist. "Mad Dog" Briskout covers Ant Grist hooking the leg. Don Wolverton counts. ...1 ...2 Ant Grist kicks out. ]
Justin Cole - He should have just stayed on the attack.
Dragon - This is shit! Another slow count!
[Ant Grist climbs to his feet. "Mad Dog" Briskout forearm smashes Ant Grist. "Mad Dog" Briskout pulls a page out of Bam Bam Biggalo's book, headbutting Ant Grist. ]
Joel - Ant Grist takes a headbutt.
Dragon - You know what? Kain left because ICW let him out of his contract. Ant wants to go back to being exclusive to DCW right? Why don’t they let him out of HIS contract?
Justin Cole - I have no idea. Ant’s here until “Frostbite” at least.
Dragon - That’s crap.
["Mad Dog" Briskout with a short clothesline to Ant Grist. Ant Grist climbs to his feet. Ant Grist with a DDT. Ant Grist climbs to his feet. Ant Grist goes off the top nailing "Mad Dog" Briskout with a flying elbow drop to the gut. Ant Grist is back on his feet. "Mad Dog" Briskout gets up. "Mad Dog" Briskout executes a jawbreaker on Ant Grist.]
Dragon - That’s what I’m talking about Mad Dog!
Justin Cole - Mad Dog Briskout is a double champion. UK champ and one half of the tag team champions with Jeebus.
Joel - Jeebus got a big win over Shotgun here tonight.
["Mad Dog" Briskout clotheslines Ant Grist. Ant Grist sends "Mad Dog" Briskout into Don Wolverton he goes down.]
Dragon - Reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeef bump! Idiot refs! Why don’t they ever just GET OUT OF THE WAY!?!?
[Ant Grist lifts up "Mad Dog" Briskout with authority in a suplex, then he drops him face first onto the mat. Ant covers Mad Dog.]
Joel - 1.. 2.. 3... 4.. 5... That’s it, Ant should be the new UK champion.
Dragon - Awe. Too bad the ref is out. Sucks to be Ant. Wait... it would suck to be Ant NO MATTER WHAT.
[Ant Grist stomps "Mad Dog" Briskout. "Mad Dog" Briskout climbs to his feet. Al Ritter comes to the ring. Ritter clotheslines Ant Grist. Al Ritter delivers a low blow to Ant Grist. Ritter sucks chants start in the crowd.]
Joel - Whoa, what the hell? What is going on here?
Dragon - I don’t know, but I like it!
[Mad Dog pushes Ritter and yells at him. Ritter pushes Mad Dog back. Mad Dog clothslines Ritter. Mad Dog puts Ritter on the top rope and gives him a Doggy Days DDT. Mad Dog rolls Ritter out of the ring.]
Justin Cole - This is insane, Ritter came out and attacked Ant Grist, now Briskout is attacking Ritter!
Joel - Well Ritter and Mad Dog don’t get along too well...
[Don Wolverton gets up. Mad Dog is looking out the ring at Ritter who is laying on the floor. Ant walks up behind Mad Dog. A Soviet Suplex crashes "Mad Dog" Briskout to the mat. Ant Grist chants start.]
Dragon - Now he stole that move from Soviet in the old EWF/UWF!!!
[Ant Grist covers "Mad Dog" Briskout. Don Wolverton counts. ...1 ...2 ...3 ]
Justin Cole - We've got ourselves a winner!
Nina Garcia - The winner of this match, and new UK champion, Ant Grist!!!
Dragon - Ant won with a freaking SOVIET SUPLEX?!?! What is this, the twilight Zone!
[Ritter gets a sword from under the ring.]
Joel - Whoa, whoa guys! What is Ritter doing!
[Ritter slides in the ring and rushes at Ant. Ant ducks and rolls out of the ring. Ritter yells at Ant to get back in the ring. Ant gives Ritter the middle finger, holds up the UK belt and leaves.]
Justin Cole - Ant’s smart. He just wrestled a match for the UK title. He’s not going to get in the ring with a guy that’s got a sword unless he’s “fresh”.
Ritter gets a mic.
Ritter: Fine! That’s fine... I’ll get you sooner or later. You’re not the only one tainting the land. There is another... Another who must be purged. Deathkiss! Get out here!
Deathkiss vs. Al Ritter
Nina Garcia - On her way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 190 pounds, Deathkiss!!!
[Deathkiss comes to the ring! ]
[Deathkiss is talking to Ritter.]
Justin Cole - Looks like Deathkiss is trying to talk Ritter out of the match...
[Ritter clothslines Deathiss.]
Dragon - Doesn’t look like she talked him out of it...
(the bell rings)
[Deathkiss tackles Al Ritter. Ritter is driven further into the mat by Deathkiss with a diving elbow smash. Deathkiss climbs to her feet. Al Ritter gets up. Deathkiss hits Ritter with an earringer. Deathkiss delivers a spinning backbreaker to Ritter. Deathkiss stomps Al Ritter's head. Deathkiss kicks Ritter on the mat. Al Ritter moves back to his feet. Deathkiss drives Al Ritter's head into the mat with a swinging bulldog.]
Dragon - Wow, Deathkiss is taking it to Ritter. I hope the irony of him wrestling a girl isn’t lost on him in his mentally deranged state.
[Eric Huggens starts the count ...1 ..2 Ritter kicks out. ]
Joel - Deathkiss is doing quite well at this point in the match.
[A side kick by Deathkiss turns the match around by knocking Al Ritter to the floor.]
Joel - Deathkiss executes a flying side kick.
Dragon - Wow, this is embarrassing. At least when I wrestled girls, I WON.
[Ritter clotheslines Deathkiss. ]
Justin Cole - This might be what Ritter needs to turn the match around.
[(Deathkiss looks like she is going to backhand Al Ritter, but he makes a fist, Punching Al Ritter. Deathkiss eye pokes Ritter. Deathkiss comes from behind and bulldogs Al Ritter. Deathkiss gets up. Deathkiss pulls off a fantastic Northern Lights Powerbomb on Ritter. ]
Dragon - That Northern Lights Powerbomb was very good. I’m impressed!!!
[Deathkiss is up again. Deathkiss chokes Al Ritter with her boot. ]
Justin Cole - Good choke by Deathkiss.
Dragon - I happen to know that Ritter LIKES that.
Joel - How’s that?
Dragon - I went into Ritter and Deathkiss’s office without knocking once.. *shudders* I don’t want to talk about it...
Justin Cole - Al Ritter could use some help about now.
[Al Ritter with a quick jab to Deathkiss's chin. ]
Joel - jab!
Dragon - I can’t believe he punched a girl...
[Al Ritter pokes Deathkiss in the eyes. Al Ritter kicks Deathkiss. Ritter grabs Deathiss and gives her the “Lunar Eclipse!” Ritter covers Deatkiss. 1... 2... 3!]
Joel - We've got ourselves a winner!
Nina Garcia - The winner of this match, Al Ritter!!!
[Ritter ties Deathkiss up in the ropes. He slides out of the ring and gets the sword he had from before. Ritter gets back in the ring. He walks towards Deathkiss.]
Justin Cole - What’s Ritter got in mind?!?!
Dragon - I don’t know, but I don’t think it’s good for Deathkiss. I wonder if Ritter got his ring back from her first?
[Suddenly the crowd cheers as The X runs down to the ring. The X slides in the ring, and gives Ritter a “Boot to da head” (Super kick.) The X unties Deathkiss from the ropes. The X helps Deathkiss away from the ring. Ritter gets up and howls in anger.]
Dragon - Man, that Ritter is a few eggs short of an omelet.
Alliance of Darkness (Shady & Crimson) vs International Incident (Fat Man & Phantasmo) vs Corruption (Crisis & Widow) vs The Showstoppers! (Gorgeous Garret Rogers & Wolf)
Joel - This match is a four corners tag match. On their way to the ring at this time, Alliance of Darkness!!!
[Alliance of Darkness (Shday & Crimson) Come to the ring. ]
Joel - and their opponents, the team of Corruption.
[Crisis and Widow come down to the ring. ]
Joel - team number three is International Incident.
[International Incident (Fat Man and Phantasmo Jr.) Come to the ring. ]
Joel - and their final opponents, The Showstoppers!.
[The Showstoppers (Wolf & Garret Rogers) come to the ring!
[Crimson spits on Crisis.]
[Crisis gets on the turnbuckle and poses for the fans.]
[Don Wolverton checks Phantasmo Jr.'s boots and knee pads.]
[Don Wolverton checks Wolf's boots and knee pads.]
(the bell rings)
Fat Man punches Wolf repeatedly. Phantasmo Jr. piledrives Wolf. Phantasmo Jr. sets Wolf up DDTs him into the mat. ]
Justin Cole - Wolf is being double teamed by the International Incident!
Dragon - Man, those guys are a joke. I don’t think they’ve EVER won a match.
[Fat Man gets hit with a diving elbow smash from Wolf. Wolf measures Fat Man up and drops a closed fist. ]
Justin Cole - Wolf executes a Fist drop.
[Now Fat Man standing. Wolf's chest is beet red after a Baba chop by Fat Man. ]
Dragon - Fat Man with a Baba Chop.
Justin Cole - Fat Man has massive hands. I bet that hurt.
[Wolf bounces off the ropes and clothslines Fat Man. Fat Man stands there and takes it. Wolf tags in Garret Rogers. Rogers bounces off the ropes and clothslines Fat Man. Same thing, Fat Man stands there and takes the move. Wolf and Garret Rogers BOTH bounce off the ropes and go for a DOUBLE closthline... to no affect. Fat Man clothslines Wolf and Rogers and they hit the mat. Fat Man tags in Phantasmo. Phantasmo gets on the top rope and waits for Rogers to get up. Phantasmo flys off the top rope with a pinning head scissors. 1.. 2.. Garret Rogers kicks out!]
Joel - I thought you said they were a joke!
Dragon - They are!
Joel - They almost won!
Dragon - I know!!!
[Rogers runs over and tags in Widow. Widow runs in the ring. Phantasmo takes Widow down with an arm drag. Widow gets up and runs at Phantasmo again. Phantasmo takes him down with a second arm drag. Widow acts like he’s going to run at Phantasmo. Phantasmo drops down for a third arm drag, but Widow stops in mid run. Widow kicks Phantasmo in the head. ]
Tonner - Wow, fake out!
[Widow picks up Phantasmo and slams him to the mat with a double underhook piledriver. Widow pins Phantasmo... 1... 2 ... Phantasmo kicks out!]
Justin Cole - That was almost it! !
[Flying side kick by Phantasmo Jr takes Widow off his feet. Widow rolls over to the AOD corner and tags in Crimson. ]
Justin Cole - Here comes Crimson.
Tonner - AOD just split off from 4Life. I’m surprised Body Breaker hasn’t had anything to say about Crimson and Shady leaving the group.
[Crimson comes over and starts punching Phantasmo. Crimson whips Phantasmo to the ropes. Phantasmo comes off the ropes and Crimson hits him with a “thez press”. Crimson lays several punches into Phantasmo’s head and then puts his knees on Phantasmo’s shoulders, pinning him to the mat.]
Dragon - Hey, that’s a good idea!
[1.. 2.. Fat Man comes in and breaks up the pin.]
Justin Cole - Fat Man made the save there...
[The ref gets Fat Man to leave the ring. Crimson drags Phantasmo to the AOD corner. Crimson brings in Shady for Alliance of Darkness. Shady suplexs Phantasmo. Shady pins Phantasmo. 1... 2... Fat Man makes the save again!]
Dragon - I’ve never seen Fat Man move so fast!
[Crimson gets in the ring and attacks Fat Man. Shady gives Phantasmo Jr. a Shadow Stunner! He pins Phantasmo while Crimson is fighting with Fat Man. 1... 2... 3!]
Justin Cole - Shady just pinned Phantasmo Jr.!
Dragon - International Incident has been eliminated. That leaves three teams.
[Wolf gets in the ring. Shady clotheslines Wolf. Shady brings in Crimson for Alliance of Darkness. Wolf gets up and gives Crimson a “Rock Bottom“ style move. Wolf pins Crimson. 1.. 2.. Crimson kicks out!]
Justin Cole - Great Move from Wolf!
[Wolf hooks Crimson in an armlock leglock submission. The referee is checking the situation. ... Crimson trys to escape. ... ... (AHHHH!) ... Crimson manages to grab the ropes. The ref tells Wolf to let go of the hold. Wolf doesn’t. The ref counts. 1.. 2... 3... 4... Wolf lets go of the hold.]
Dragon - Great way to take advantage of the rules. Get all of the five count you can, and let the hold go before you get DQed!
[Wolf sidewalk slams Crimson hard into the mat. Crimson is up again. Crimson pulls out a dirty eye poke to Wolfs eye. Crimson brings in Shady for Alliance of Darkness. . ]
Joel - Crimson and Shady are snubbing Corruption by not tagging them in!
Dragon - Yeah, but it works in Crisis and Widows FAVOR! They’ll be fresh later on in this ELIMINATION match...
[Wolf gets thrown into the corner and gets boot choked by Shady. Shady throws Wolf outside the ring. ]
Justin Cole - My God! Shady could be killed! They've moved to ringside, there's weapons there!!
[Don Wolverton starts the count (.1) Shady swings a Steel chair and hits Wolf. Wolf is bleeding as a result. Shady jumps onto Wolf's shoulders, twists, and DDT's him onto the floor They fight into the aisle. (..2) ]
Joel - Did you see that last move?
Justin Cole - Oh yeah!
[Body Breaker and Cereal Killer come out! They run over and start attacking Shady. Crimson gets off the ring apron and runs up the ramp to help Shady. Meanwhile, Wolf has gotten a Steel chair. He hits Shady with the chair. Wolf drags Shady back to the ring, while Body Breaker and Cereal Killer double team Crimson.]
Joel - DQ! DQ!
Justin Cole - It‘s outside the ring! It‘s all legal!
[Wolf picks up Shady and “rock bottoms“ him into the steel steps.]
Dragon - Oh man! No mercy from Wolf!
[Wolf rolls Shady in the ring and pins him. 1... 2... 3!]
Dragon - That’s two teams down!
Joel - It’s either going to be Crisis and Widow, or Wolf and Garret Rogers that win this match!
[Crisis whips G2R's feet from under him with a side kick. Crisis gets up. Crisis covers Rogers hooking the leg. The ref starts the count. ...1 Rogers escapes. ]
Justin Cole - He should have just stayed on the attack.
[Crisis's head pops back from the jab thrown by Gorgeous Garret Rogers. ]
Tonner - Rogers with a jab.
[ Rogers makes the tag to Wolf. A Frankensteiner by Wolf drives Crisis's forehead to the mat. Now Wolf standing. Wolf elbows Crisis in the face. ]
Tonner - Wolf with a back elbow.
[Crisis makes the tag to Widow. Widow punches Wolf repeatedly. Crisis drives a forearm into Wolf. Widow sets Wolf up DDTs him into the mat. ]
Joel - Come on ref! Do something!! Wolf is being double teamed!
[Widow punishes Wolf with a swinging neckbreaker. ]
Nina Garcia - That swinging neckbreaker was very good.
[Wolf stands up. Widow drags Wolf to the floor. ]
Joel - Wolf is much safer at ringside. Widow can't get a pin there.
[Don Wolverton starts the count (.1) Widow nails Wolf with a dropkick. Widow chants start. Now Widow standing. (..2) ]
Justin Cole - What an outstanding match!
[(...3) Wolf on the floor, and Widow with a measured fist drop. Wolf gets up. (....4) Wolf explodes Widow's back with an excellent spinning backbreaker. Widow is back on his feet. (.....5) They head back into the ring. Wolf punches Widow. Crisis makes the tag to Widow. Crisis trips Wolf up with a single leg takedown. Wolf connects with a flying knee. Crisis goes down. ]
Joel - Crisis takes a knee.
[Wolf goes for a airplane spin toss but Crisis dodges the attack. Wolf and Crisis go to the floor Don Wolverton starts the count (.1) (..2) Wolf whips Crisis into the ropes and executes a diving shoulder block, knocking Crisis to the floor ]
Nina Garcia - Wolf executes a diving shoulder block.
[Now Crisis standing. (...3) Crisis pokes Wolf in the eye with his thumb. (....4) Wolf runs and tackles Crisis. Wolf punches him in the head. (.....5) Wolf takes Crisis into the ring. Crisis is driven further into the mat by Wolf with a diving elbow smash. Wolf gets back to his feet. Crisis gets back to his feet. Crisis scoop slams Wolf. Wolf, lying on the mat, is nailed with a devistating top rope legdrop by Crisis. Crisis moves back to his feet. Crisis applies the double reverse chinlock to Wolf. Don Wolverton asks Wolf if he quits. ... Crisis tightens the hold. ... Crisis tightens the hold. ... Crisis breaks the hold. ]
Justin Cole - Crisis is doing quite well at this point in the match.
[Crisis makes the tag to Widow. Widow grabs Wolf and applies an arm wrench. ]
Joel - Come on ref! Do something!! Wolf is being double teamed!
[They lockup. Wolf sends Widow to the corner of the ring. Rock-Star Richard Royal jumps on the ring apron with a cruth. ]
Tonner - Now what is he doing?!
[Royal swings the crutch at Widow, but he ducks and Royal smashes Wolf in the face with the crutch. Wolf goes down.]
Joel - DID HE TURN ON WOLF ALREADY!?!
Tonner: No way! It was an accident! He was aiming for Widow!
[Widow covers Wolf. Rogers comes in the ring to break up the pin, but Crisis cuts him off. 1... 2...3!]
Tonner - Crisis and Widow win the match!!!
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