ICW Lord of the Ring December 31st 2002

Boston, Massachusetts

Al Ritter and The X vs. Slash and Street Boy vs. The Showstoppers (Tag Team Titles)

Nina Garcia - Ladies and Gentlemen, the following will be a Triple Threat Tag Team Match for the CIA Tag Team Titles. Introducing first, at a combined weight of 503 lbs, The Showstoppers!

[The Showstoppers come down to the ring and hop in.]

Nina Garcia - And their opponents, first, from Kalamazoo, Michigan, weighing in at 150 lbs, Al Ritter!

[Al Ritter’s music plays as he makes his way down to the ring, the crowd’s reaction is mixed.]

Nina Garcia - And his partner.. Also from Kalamazoo, Michigan, weighing in at 230 lbs, THEEEE X!

[“Walk” by Pantera blasts from the PA system as The X struts down to the ring to an outstanding pop from the crowd. He jumps into the ring and talks to Ritter. The Showstoppers climb out as he enters and stand outside, waiting for the match to begin.]

Nina Garcia - And their opponents, the Tag Team Champions, at a combined weight of 614 lbs, Slash and Street Boy.

[Slash and Street Boy run down to the ring without waiting for their entrance music. They immediately clash with Ritter and The X. Ritter whips Street Boy into The X who tosses Street Boy over his shoulders and out of the ring onto the Showstoppers.]

Cole - Whoa, nice team work by Ritter and The X here.

[Ritter and The X turn around as Slash jumps from the turnbuckle. They immediately dropkick him in mid air. Richard Royal slides into the ring and takes down Ritter from behind. Street Boy and Garrett Rogers start to beat down The X.]

Joel - 4 on 2 I guess.

[Slash and Rogers get out of the ring. The X manages to roll out near his corner too.]

(ding, ding, ding)

[Street Boy picks up Ritter and snapmares him, followed by a dropkick to the back of the head. Street Boy scoop slam’s Ritter. The X climbs up onto the apron and reaches for the tag desperately. Street Boy continues to beat on Ritter. He then tags out to Slash. Slash immediately toe kicks Ritter in the gut and starts pounding on him. Ritter doubles over as Slash rebounds of the ropes and knee’s him in the face. Slash stands Ritter up again and wenches his arm. Ritter somersault’s onto his feet, turns around and reverses the arm wench. He jumps into the air and kicks Slash in the back of the head. Both wrestlers fall to the ground.]

Cole - Ritter needs to make the tag to The X!

[Ritter stumbles to his feet and tags in Richard Royal, as Slash jumps and tags in The X.]

Joel - What the hell!?

Cole - Triple Threat Tag rules, only two people can be in the ring at the same time so anyone can tag anyone else.

[The X clotheslines Richard Royal. Royal jumps back up and gets clothesline again, and again. Slash attempts to attack The X but receives an elbow to the face for his troubles. Street Boy jumps into the ring and tries to clothesline The X. The X ducks kicks Street Boy in the gut. X hit’s the ‘Have Fun’ on Street Boy.]

Joel - Street Boy’s finisher!

[Richard Royal stumbles to his feet and leans near the ropes. The X taunts the crowd and superkick’s Richard Royal. Royal moves and The X kicks Ritter off the apron right across ringside and through the announce table]

Cole - My god! Ritter just shattered the announce table!!

Joel - He spilled my coffee, damnit!

[The X looks shocked as he sees Ritter go through the table but becomes MORE shocked when he realizes he’s hung up on the ropes. Royal quickly takes advantage and suplexes The X into the ring. He and Slash stomp on The X. Slash suddenly tackles Royal to the ground, mounts him and starts punching rapidly. Garrett Rogers jumps off the turnbuckle onto both men knocking them down. Royal and Rogers pick up Slash and double suplex him. They turn to X and do the same. The X reverses the suplex, flipping behind the Showstoppers and executing a double sweep kick. Royal and Rogers drop to the ground.]

Cole - Street Boy is up.

[Street Boy jumps at The X with a tag title belt, X ducks it and Street Boy takes out the referee. Ritter stumbles back into the ring. He gets in The X’s face and they start to argue inaudibly. Ritter shoves The X and X shoves him back. Suddenly, they both climb opposite turnbuckles and taunt the crowd. The X connects with a 450 Splash on Royal while Ritter hits the Full Moon Sault on Slash AND Street Boy. ]

Joel - There’s no referee to count the pin!

[All of a sudden, a referee wearing a mask jumps out from underneath the ring and slides in. He counts the pin quickly.. 1..2..3.. The masked referee then hops over the barricade and escapes through the crowd.

(ding, ding, ding)

[The X and Ritter look as confused as anybody else but they shake hands and celebrate as the Tag Titles are handed to them.]

Nina Garcia - Ladies and Gentlemen, you’re winner, and NEW CIA Tag Team Champions.. The X and Al Ritter!

Big Boi vs. The Great Buddah

Nina Garcia - This match is set for one fall! On his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 300 pounds, from Tibet, The Great Buddah!!!

[The Great Buddah comes down to the ring! ]

Nina Garcia - and his opponent, weighing in at 420 pounds, from Unknown, Big Boi!!! (crowd cheers *****)

[Big Boi comes to the ring!]

(ring, ring, ring)

[The Great Buddah jabs Big Boi. Big Boi delivers a short-arm clothesline to The Great Buddah. The Great Buddah goes down. Big Boi covers The Great Buddah hooking the leg. Eric Huggens counts the pin. ...1 ...2 The Great Buddah escapes. ]

Justin Cole - Big Boi should have known he wouldn't win the match with that.

G.W. Bush - That’s right. Only Jeebus is allowed to win matches after a low blow. Just like the low blow me and my administration are going to deliver to the axis of evil.

[The Great Buddah is up again. The Great Buddah trys for a cobra clutch suplex but Big Boi avoids it. The Great Buddah and Big Boi go to the floor Eric Huggens starts the count (.1) (..2) The Great Buddah tries to even the score with a bite to Big Boi's face. (...3) The Great Buddah knife edge chops Big Boi. ]

Joel - Big Boi takes a knife edge chop.

G.W. Bush - These are two huge men in the ring right now, I‘d have to say there is no way that Tibetan Buddah is going to beat the American .

[(....4) Big Boi with an uppercut to The Great Buddah's chin. (.....5) They head back into the ring. The Great Buddah is knocked down to the mat by a strong clothesline by Big Boi. OH!! The Great Buddah's body is crushed by Big Boi after recieving an avalanche splash into the corner.]

Justin Cole - My God!

G.W. Bush - Go Big Boi! Go!

[The Great Buddah picks up Big Boi and executes the cradle DDT. ]

Joel - Good craddle DDT by The Great Buddah.

G.W. Bush - No! Not like that!

Justin Cole - What an outstanding match!

[The Great Buddah puts Big Boi in the corner and chokes Big Boi with his boot. The Great Buddah slaps the indian deathlock onto Big Boi's legs. Eric Huggens is checking for a tap out. ... Big Boi trys to escape. ... Big Boi trys to escape. ... (AHHHH!) ... Big Boi is fighting the hold. ... ... (AHHHH!) ... ... Big Boi is fighting the hold. ... ... (AHHHH!) Big Boi taps out. ]

Justin Cole - The Great Buddah has won the match! Joel - The winner of this match, The Great Buddah!!!

Justin Cole - The Great Buddah made Big Boi submit!

G.W. Bush - Big Boi must not be American after all because Americans will never give up!

Joel - Yeah, never give up til they rule the world...

G.W. Bush - What was that?

Joel - God Damn it, all “America” ever does is push its weight around and tell everyone else how to live their lives.

G.W. Bush - You’re just jealous because your Canadian.

Sexyking vs. Scott Steiner

Dean Knightwood - This match is a Standard Match. On his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 283 pounds, from Detroit, Scott Steiner!!!

(crowd cheers ******)

[Scott Steiner comes to the ring. ]

Dean Knightwood - and his opponent, weighing in at 233 pounds, from ???????, Sexyking!!!

[Sexyking comes down to the ring.]

(ding, ding, ding)

[Steiner kicks Sexyking in the back of the leg. Flying side kick by Sexyking takes Scott Steiner off his feet. Sexyking rolls onto Steiner connecting with a knee. Sexyking stomps Steiner.]

Genessa Million - Sexyking with a stomp.

[Scott Steiner gets up. Scott Steiner piledrives Sexyking.]

Genessa Million - Are you enjoying this match?

G.W. Bush - Oh yeah!

[Steiner's head pops back from the jab thrown by Sexyking. Sexyking pokes Scott Steiner in the eyes. Sexyking kicks Steiner in the groin. Sexyking superkicks Steiner. Steiner gets hit with a diving elbow smash from Sexyking. Sexyking covers Scott Steiner hooking the leg. Don Wolverton counts the pin. ...1 Scott Steiner escapes. ]

G.W. Bush - Not even close!

[Scott Steiner moves back to his feet. Sexyking picks up Scott Steiner and hits him with the Death Valley Driver. Sexyking goes for the pin. 1... 2... 3!]

Dean Knightwood - Sexyking has won the match!

Dean Knightwood - The winner of this match, Sexyking!!!

Brimstone vs. The Iceman

Nina Garcia - This match is set for one fall! On his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 450 pounds, from The Bowls of Hell, Brimstone!!!

(crowd boos ***)

[Fire shoots out of the stage and the ring, as Brimstone walks slowly to the ring. ]

Nina Garcia - and his opponent, weighing in at 179 pounds, from Alaska, The Iceman!!!

(crowd boos ******)

[The Iceman comes down to the ring with a blue and white 4Life shirt. The Iceman yells at the crowd.]

(the bell rings)

[Brimstone hits The Iceman with a massive headbutt!]

G.W. Bush - headbutt!

Joel - That’s using your head!

Justin Cole - Iceman is staggered already!

[A face rake is given to Brimstone by The Iceman in an attempt to gain the advantage. The Iceman tackles Brimstone. Brimstone goes for a belly-to-back superplex but The Iceman dodges the attack. ]

Justin Cole - Iceman was just a little too quick there!

[Brimstone throws The Iceman off the ropes and delivers an earth shattering clothesline. The Iceman climbs to his feet. Brimstone grabs The Iceman by the arm and breaks it over his shoulder. Brimstone with a cheap thumb to the eye of The Iceman. The Iceman hits Brimstone with a single arm DDT.]

Joel - That could turn the whole match around!

[The Iceman stands up. The Iceman with an illegal chokehold on Brimstone. The Iceman twists Brimstone's arm, jumps, and dropkicks Brimstone to the ground. The Iceman slaps Brimstone in the face and starts talking trash!]

Justin Cole - There is that 4Life attitude! They don’t care! They’ll try to punk out anyone!

[Brimstone swings at Iceman, but Iceman ducks. Brimstone holds his chin after The Iceman pulls off a jawbreaker. ]

Justin Cole - The Iceman with a jawbreaker.

[The Iceman gets up. Brimstone pulls off a fantastic Northern Lights Powerbomb on The Iceman. Brimstone goes for a pin. Referee Eric Huggens makes the count. ...1 ...2 The Iceman escapes. ]

G.W. Bush - That was almost the end of the match right there!

Justin Cole - That SHOULD have been the end of the match right there!

[Brimstone covers The Iceman AGAIN hooking the leg. Referee Eric Huggens makes the count. ...1 ...2 The Iceman kicks out. ]

G.W. Bush - He should have just stayed on the attack.

Joel - How is Iceman still breathing?

[The Iceman kicks Brimstone in the stomach and executes the sitdown face slam. The Iceman sucks chants start in the crowd. Brimstone is put in an armbar by The Iceman. The referee is checking the situation. ... Brimstone is fighting the hold. ... Brimstone trys to escape. The Iceman breaks the hold. ]

G.W. Bush - This is how wrestling should be!

[Brimstone sends The Iceman into Eric Huggens he goes down. They lockup. Brimstone sends The Iceman to the corner of ringside. Brimstone bounces The Iceman off the ropes and hits him with a back body drop. Body Breaker comes to ringside.]

Joel - It’s the Body Breaker, Iceman’s running buddy in “4Life”!

[Body Breaker swings a Steel chair and hits Brimstone. Brimstone is bleeding as a result. Body Breaker trys for a power move but is unable to lift Brimstone. Brimstone clubs Body Breaker on the back. Brimstone lifts Body Breaker up and drops him to the mat with a reverse Death Valley Driver!]

Justin Cole - My god! He calls that move the “Burning Hammer”! He just took out the Body Breaker!

[Eric Huggens gets up. Brimstone bounces The Iceman off the ropes. The Iceman is knocked to the ground by Brimstone's big boot. Brimstone peels Iceman off the ring mat and gives him a Burning Hammer. Brimstone pins Iceman. 1... 2... 3!]

G.W. Bush - We've got ourselves a winner!

Nina Garcia - The winner of this match, Brimstone!!!

Body Breaker vs. Wolf vs. Jeebus

Dean Knightwood - This match is a Standard Match. Coming to the ring first, weighing in at 179 pounds, from Body Breaker Town, FL a member of 4Life, Body Breaker!!!

(crowd boos *******)

[Body Breakers music hits and Body Breaker comes down to the ring! Body Breaker has a blue 4Life tshirt and blue and white sunglasses and blue and white boas! ]

Dean Knightwood - The second in this three way match, weighing in at 200 pounds, from Fort Lauderdale, FL, Wolf!!! (crowd cheers ***)

[Wolf comes down to the ring. ]

Dean Knightwood - And third, weighing in at 200 pounds, from Unknown, Jeebus!!!

[Jeebus comes down to the ring.]

Joel: You think Jeebus is from “Unknown, FL”?

[Body Breaker taunts Wolf. Wolf tests out the ropes.]

(ring, ring, ring)

[Jeebus comes from behind and bulldogs Wolf. Jeebus flies from the turnbuckle with an elbowdrop. Wolf bites Jeebus's face out of desperation. Jeebus superkicks Wolf. Jeebus twists Wolf's arm, jumps, and dropkicks Wolf to the ground. Jeebus climbs to his feet. Jeebus goes for a pin. Don Wolverton counts the pin. ...1 ...2 Wolf kicks out. ]

Joel - Not even close!

[Wolf gets up. Jeebus kicks Wolf in the back of the leg. ]

G.W. Bush - kick!

[Wolf moves back to his feet. Wolf does a handspring and hits Jeebus with a bodyblock, what a move! Wolf chants start. Wolf gets up. ]

Dean Knightwood - Wolf is doing quite well at this point in the match.

[Wolf hits Jeebus with a moonsault after springboarding off of the second rope. Now Jeebus standing. ]

G.W. Bush - This is quality sports entertainment!

[Jeebus is brought to the mat with a diving shoulder tackle from Wolf. ]

Dean Knightwood - Jeebus takes a diving shoulder block.

[Jeebus gets up. An Aztecan suplex by Jeebus proves to be too much for Wolf. Wolf is lying on the mat in pain. Jeebus gets back to his feet. Wolf stands up. Wolf gets caught with an elbowsmash to the face. Wolf grabs Jeebus by the arm and breaks it over his shoulder. Jeebus delivers a short-arm clothesline to Wolf. Jeebus covers Wolf. The ref starts the count. ...1 Wolf kicks out. ]

Joel - Jeebus should have known he wouldn't win the match with that.

[Wolf gets back to his feet. Body Breaker piledrives Wolf into the mat. Body Breaker sucks chants start in the crowd. Body Breaker with executes a bearhug on Wolf. Don Wolverton asks Wolf if he quits. ... Wolf trys to escape. ... ... Body Breaker tightens the hold. ... Wolf escapes. ]

Genessa Million - This is how wrestling should be!

[Body Breaker punches Wolf repeatedly. Body Breaker is taken back by an elbow at the hands of Wolf. Body Breaker kicks Wolf in the back of the leg. Body Breaker grabs Wolf by the arm and breaks it over his shoulder. Body Breaker bends over as Wolf elbows him in the midsection. Body Breaker grabs Wolf's head and bites him in the face. ]

Dean Knightwood - face bite!

[Jeebus executes a bulldog off of the top rope, bringing Wolf crashing face first to the mat. Jeebus covers Wolf. Don Wolverton counts. ...1 ...2 Wolf kicks out. ]

Joel - That was almost the end of the match right there!

[Wolf is back on his feet. Wolf is dropped to the mat by Body Breaker with an Asian leg lariat. ]

G.W. Bush - Nice Asian leg lariat by Body Breaker.

[Body Breaker is back on his feet. Body Breaker wraps his arms around Wolf's waist, applying a bearhug. Don Wolverton asks Wolf if he quits. ... ... (AHHHH!) ... Wolf is fighting the hold. Wolf escapes. Body Breaker sends Wolf to ringside. Don Wolverton starts the count (.1) Body Breaker chokes Wolf with a microphone cable. Jeebus flies from the turnbuckle with an elbowdrop. Jeebus executes a corkscrew legdrop on Wolf. Jeebus and Body Breaker move back into the ring. Jeebus hits Body Breaker with the Perderest Cute! 1.. 2.. 3!]

G.W. Bush - Jeebus has won the match!

Dean Knightwood - The winner of this match, Jeebus!!!

Prime Offender vs. Clint Rezner (Insane Title Match)

Dean Knightwood - This match is a Standard Match for the Insane title. On his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 252 pounds, from Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada he holds the Insane title belt, Prime Offender!!!

[Prime Offender comes down to the ring! ]

Dean Knightwood - and his opponent, weighing in at 276 pounds, from Essex, England a member of Brickhouse Army, Clint Rezner!!! (crowd boos ******)

[Clint Rezner comes to the ring!]

[Prime Offender taunts Clint Rezner.]

(the bell rings)

[Prime Offender with a knife edge chop to Clint Rezner's chest. Clint Rezner punches PO. Prime Offender's up on Clint Rezner's shoulders, and Clint Rezner drops down with the DVD. Clint Rezner gets back to his feet. Clint Rezner sends PO to ringside. Don Wolverton starts the count (.1) ]

Genessa Million - I wish every match could be like this!

[Clint Rezner sets Prime Offender up DDTs him into the floor. They fight into the aisle. (..2) Clint Rezner swings a Steel chair and hits Prime Offender. Prime Offender is bleeding as a result. Clint Rezner suplexes Prime Offender. Prime Offender moves back to his feet. (...3) Clint Rezner trys for a craddle DDT but Prime Offender avoids it. (....4) Prime Offender trys for a double underhook piledriver but Clint Rezner avoids it. (.....5) Prime Offender nails Clint Rezner with a huge slingshot sommersault splash. PO moves back to his feet. (......6) ]

G.W. Bush - PO can't win the match out there.

[ PO cuts Clint Rezner with a blade. Clint Rezner is bleeding as a result. Clint Rezner climbs to his feet. (.......7) Clint Rezner and Prime Offender move back to ringside. They fight into the aisle. Clint Rezner and Prime Offender move back to ringside. They head back into the ring. Prime Offender gets caught with an elbowsmash to the face. ]

Dean Knightwood - Prime Offender takes a elbow smash.

[Clint Rezner holds PO in the corner, choking him with his forearm. Clint Rezner smashes PO's chest with a double axehandle chop. ]

Joel - PO takes a double axehandle chop.

[ PO moves back to his feet. PO with a quick jab to Clint Rezner's chin. Clint Rezner hits PO in the face, trying to gain some kind of advantage. PO off the top rope with a cross-body block. The ref starts the count. ...1 ...2 Clint Rezner kicks out. ]

Genessa Million - Prime Offender almost won the match!

[Clint Rezner is back on his feet. Prime Offender with a knife edge chop to Clint Rezner's chest. ]

G.W. Bush - Prime Offender executes a knife edge chop.

[Clint Rezner spins around, then mule kicks Prime Offender in the groin. Clint Rezner clotheslines PO. ]

Genessa Million - Clint Rezner with a weak move.

[ PO holds his chin after Clint Rezner pulls off a jawbreaker. Clint Rezner climbs to his feet. PO climbs to his feet. Prime Offender pulls Clint Rezner's hair. ]

Dean Knightwood - PO with a hair pull.

[Clint Rezner throws Prime Offender off the ropes and hits him with a diving shoulder block. Now Prime Offender standing. PO's head meets the mat by a double arm DDT by Clint Rezner. Now Clint Rezner standing. Prime Offender stands up. Clint Rezner applies the clawhold on PO. Referee Don Wolverton is checking for a tap out. ... (AHHHH!) ... ... Clint Rezner tightens the hold. ... Clint Rezner tightens the hold. Clint Rezner breaks the hold. ]

G.W. Bush - Prime Offender could use some help about now.

[ PO gets choked by the rope as Clint Rezner stun-guns him. Clint Rezner sets Prime Offender up DDTs him into the mat. Clint Rezner sucks chants start in the crowd. Clint Rezner punches PO, then Prime Offender pulls Clint Rezner's hair when the ref isn't looking. PO bites Clint Rezner's face out of desperation. Prime Offender applies an octopus strangle hold to Clint Rezner, the ref doesn't know it, but he's choking Clint Rezner. The referee is checking the situation. ... Clint Rezner is fighting the hold. ... ... (AHHHH!) ... ... ... PO tightens the hold. ... ... ... PO tightens the hold. ... Clint Rezner taps out. ]

Genessa Million - We've got ourselves a winner!

Dean Knightwood - The winner of this match, and still Insane champion, Prime Offender!!!

*PO rolls out of the ring and grabs a satchel that was by the annoucing table and he pulls out two large Colt 45s.The crowd pops enourmously as the CIA Insane Champion rolls back into the ring and takes a firm position on the top left turnbuckle and opens the Colts as a encharade of cheers erupt as PO begins to chug the Colts the piss like substance pouring all over his face and down his shirt*

Hardbody vs. Tear (UnderWorld Title)

Dean Knightwood - This match is a Standard Match for the UnderWorld title. On her way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 112 pounds, from Unknown, Tear!!!

[Tear comes down to the ring ]

Dean Knightwood - and her opponent, weighing in at 195 pounds, from Houston,Tx, Hardbody!!! (crowd cheers ********)

[Hardbody comes to the ring!]

(the bell rings)

[Tear uppercuts Hardbody. A face rake is given to Tear by Hardbody in an attempt to gain the advantage. Hardbody kicks Tear in the back of the leg. Tear trys for a spinning backbreaker but is unable to lift Hardbody. Hardbody tries to even the match with a flying shoulder block. Hardbody is back on her feet. Hardbody knees Tear and rolls back to her feet. Now Tear standing. Tear drags Hardbody to the floor. ]

G.W. Bush - Hardbody will have to watch out for weapons at ringside.

[Don Wolverton starts the count (.1) (..2) Tear with a knife edge chop to Hardbody's chest. (...3) Hardbody with an Aztecan suplex on Tear sends her to the floor. Now Hardbody standing. Tear is back on her feet. (....4) Hardbody holds her mouth after recieving an elbow smash to the face. ]

Joel - Tear executes a elbow smash.

[(.....5) Tear takes Hardbody into the ring. Tear does a cartwheel and kicks Hardbody in the face. Now Hardbody standing. Hardbody executes the airplane spin and throws Tear onto the mat. Hardbody monkey flips Tear onto the mat. ]

Genessa Million - Tear takes a monkey flip.

[Hardbody sidewalk slams Tear hard into the mat. Tear stands up. Tear trys for a side suplex but is not strong enough to lift Hardbody. Tear grabs Hardbody's leg, rolls her over, and locks in a half Boston Crab. The referee is checking the situation. ... ... ... Hardbody escapes. Hardbody sends Tear into Don Wolverton he goes down. Drake Steele runs to ringside. Drake Steele cuts Hardbody with a blade. Hardbody is bleeding as a result. Drake Steele piledrives Hardbody. Don Wolverton gets up. Tear pins Hardbody. 1.. 2...3! ]

G.W. Bush - Tear has won the match!

Dean Knightwood - The winner of this match, and new UnderWorld champion, Tear!!!

Crisis vs. "The British Badass" Cash (Hardcore Title)

Dean Knightwood - This match is a Hard-Core Match for the Hardcore title. On his way to the ring at this time, weighing in at 330 pounds, from Liverpool, U.K, "The British Badass" Cash!!!

["The British Badass" Cash comes to the ring! ]

Dean Knightwood - and his opponent, weighing in at 190 pounds, from New York, Crisis!!! (crowd cheers ****)

[Crisis comes to the ring. "The British Badass" Cash tests out the ropes. Crisis gets on the turnbuckle and poses for the fans.]

(ding, ding, ding)

[Crisis charges in at Cash, and Cash poke Crisis in the eyes. Cash goes outside the ring and gets a pair of garbage cans, throwing them in the ring. Cash slides back in the ring and locks up with Crisis. Crisis throws Cash to the rope. Cash comes of the ropes and Crisis hits Cash with a drop toe hold. Crisis floats over and locks Cash in a headlock.]

Dean Knightwood: Wrestling moves? In a Hardcore match? FROM CRISIS?

Joel: Don’t look at me man, I’m confused too.

Cash fights out of the headlock. They lock up agian. The British Badass explodes Crisis's back with an excellent spinning backbreaker. Crisis get nailed with a double axhandle chop from The British Badass. Crisis gets hit with a back heel kick. "The British Badass" Cash kicks Crisis in the stomach. Cash grabs Crisis and piledrives him on a garbage can.]

Justin Cole: Cash seems to be in control of the match to far.

Crisis drags The British Badass to the floor. Crisis throws Baseball Bat at The British Badass. The British Badass trys for a Northern Lights Powerbomb but Crisis avoids it. Cash locks Crisis in that boston crab. Don Wolverton is checking for a tap out. ... Crisis is fighting the hold. ... ... Crisis is fighting the hold. ... Crisis escapes. Crisis trips Cash. Crisis throws the ring steps at Cash, but Cash rolls out of the way.]

Dean Knightwood - The British Badass too quick there.

[ The British Badass with a knife edge chop to Crisis's chest. Crisis pokes The British Badass in the eye with his thumb. ]

Genessa Million - thumb to the eye!

[Crisis kicks The British Badass in the stomach. Crisis picks up Cash and Powerbombs him on the steps. The crowd growns and a few start to chant D-C-W, D-C-W, D-C-W! The British Badass is back on his feet. "The British Badass" Cash heart punches Crisis. Crisis falls to the ground, holding his chest. Crisis gets hit with a diving elbow smash from Cash.]

Dean Knightwood - I’m sure that move hurt Cash also.

[Now The British Badass standing. They fight into the aisle. Crisis, lying on the floor, is nailed with a devastating Moonsault off the guard rail by Cash. The British Badass is back on his feet. The British Badass throws Crisis up the ramp! Crisis is driven further into the Steel Grating by Cash with a leg drop. Crisis is back on his feet. Crisis short clothslines "The British Badass" Cash.]

Justin Cole: These two men fighting on the rampway now!

["The British Badass" Cash and Crisis go backstage Cash swings a Steel chair and hits Crisis. Crisis is bleeding as a result. ]

Joel - Crisis could use some help about now.

[Crisis gets back to his feet. "The British Badass" Cash throws a chair at Crisis. ]

Joel - Blood is all over the backstage area.

[Cash walks over and picks Crisis up off the floor. Crisis punches Cash in the gut. Crisis throws Cash into a wall, Cash goes down. Crisis walks into a room, and returns with a pane of glass!]

Joel: I don’t want to know what going to happen now!

[Crisis smashes the glass on Cash’s face! Crisis picks up a shard of glass and starts to cut away at Cash’s face!]

Joel: Oh man, this isn’t right! He’s trying to disfigure him!

[Now a lot of fans are chanting DCW. Cash pushes Crisis away. "The British Badass" Cash drives a forearm into Crisis. Crisis is sent to the Cement by a flying kick from Cash. Crisis moves back to his feet. Crisis throws "The British Badass" Cash out a door... They are outside now!]

Justin Cole: They are outside the arena now. No telling what could happen here! [Crisis slaps Cash. Crisis trys for a power bomb but is unable to lift The British Badass. Crisis applies the hangman's noose submission to "The British Badass" Cash. Don Wolverton asks "The British Badass" Cash if he quits. ... "The British Badass" Cash is fighting the hold. ... ... (AHHHH!) ... ... ... Crisis tightens the hold. ... (AHHHH!) ... Crisis tightens the hold. ... ... "The British Badass" Cash is fighting the hold and escapes.]

Dean Knightwood: Cash wont give up!

[Cash swings at Crisis, but Crisis dodges and puts Cash in a full nelson. Crisis rapidity rams Cash face first into the side of the brick building! Multiple times!]

Justin Cole: Someone stop this! Come on Crisis, pin the guy! This isn’t DCW, we don’t want our wrestlers to die!

[Crisis drops Cash to the street and pins him. 1.. 2.. 3!]

Genessa Million - Crisis has won the match!

Justin Cole: I think he might have gone a little far in winning the match!

Dean Knightwood - The winner of this match, and new Hardcore champion, Crisis!!!

Joel: An now it’s time for the main event!

Dean Knightwood: A thirty man over the top rope battle royal for the CIA WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT TITLE!!!

Justin Cole: Let’s get right to the action. We are about to find out who the first participant is!

“Heads I win, tails you lose
Outta our way we’re coming through
Roll the dice, don’t think twice and we crush, crush ‘em
Now we lay you down to rest
You’ll never be more than second best
Step inside you’re in for a ride and we crush, crush ‘em”

[Crush ‘Em by Megadeth plays as Gorgeous Garret Rogers comes down to the ring.]

Dean Knightwood: Gorgeous Garret Rogers is the first wrestler in the ring for the last match of 2002!

Justin Cole: Garret has an advantage in that he’s one of the CIA stars that hasn’t already had a brutal match tonight, he got off with a fairly normal match. But he has the unlucky number one spot.

Joel: I’ve seen it done before though Cole. A few times I’ve seen battle royals in other promotions where the first guy in is the last guy out! This could be Garret’s lucky night!

Dean Knightwood: Here comes Garret’s first test.

[“Heads I win, tails you lose
Outta our way we’re coming through
Roll the dice, don’t think twice and we crush, crush ‘em
Now we lay you down to rest
You’ll never be more than second best
Step inside you’re in for a ride and we crush, crush ‘em”]

[Crush ‘Em by Megadeth plays.]

Justin Cole: Er... sorry fans, looks like a little technical difficulty here...

Joel: Stupid production people. Can’t even switch over a tape to play the right theme music. I swear we hired those guys out of a gutter.!

[Rock-Star Richard Royal comes out from behind the entrance curtain!]

Dean Knightwood: It WASN’T technical difficulty! R3 is the second man in this battle royal!

Justin Cole: The Showstoppers now have a tremendous advantage. Not only are they semi-fresh, but they start out in the ring alone. They’ve got the power of two!

[Royal walks up to ringside. He pulls up the ring apron and looks under the ring. He pulls out a table and slides it in the ring. He pulls out a table and slides it in the ring. Royal pulls out two chairs and slides them in the ring also!]

Joel: What the hell are they doing?!?

Justin Cole: Looks like the Showstoppers are arming themselves for battle!

[The Showstoppers are waiting in the ring.]

[Buzz!]

[“All you people can't you see, can't you see
How your love's affecting my reality
Every time I’m down You can make it right
And that makes me larger than life”

[“Larger Than Life” by the Backstreet Boys plays as Big Boi walks out to the ring.]

Justin Cole: Here we go!

Dean Knightwood: That is a monster walking to the ring right now! Big Boi is a seven foot nine inch, four hundred and twenty pound MONSTER!

Joel: Yeah, but the Showstoppers got chairs!

[Big Boi steps up on the ring apron and steps OVER the top rope. He looks at the Showstoppers who are holding the chairs, contemplating their first move. Royal charges at Big Boi, but he lifts a foot and “Big Boots” the chair into Royal’s face. Rogers runs at Big Boi with a chair, but BIg Boi punches the chair into Roger’s face.]

Justin Cole: Both the Showstoppers are down already!

Joel: Big Boi is my pick to win this thing! Look at him! He’s huge! He’s a juggernaut of pain and destruction!

[Big Boi picks up Rogers. Big Boi hold Garret Rogers high over his head and walks over to the side of the ring. Big Boi is about to throw Garret Rogers over the top rope, when Royal runs over and shoulder blocks the back of Big Boi’s knee. Big Boi drops Garret Rogers to the mat and falls to one knee. Garret Rogers gets up and kicks Big Boi’s other knee. Big Boi in on both knees. Garret Rogers picks up a chair and hits Big Boi in the face. Big Boi doesn’t fall down. He’s still on his knees. He’s screaming now. Garret Rogers has a worried look on his face.]

Joel: Holy Crap! He just got hit in the face with a chair, and not only did he NOT fall down, he’s begging for more! Please sir, can I have another!

[Royal picks up a chair. He rears back and takes a swing, whacking Big Boi in the head with the chair. Big Boi’s head rolls around on his shoulders for a second, but he looks at the showstoppers and screams at them some more.]

Justin Cole: This is insane! I’ve never seen anything like this before!

Joel: If they are going to get rid of Big Boi, they better do it soon, the next person is about to come to the ring!

[The Showstoppers look at each other. They both turn to look at Big Boi. They swing their chairs at the same time, hitting Big Boi on both sides of his head! Big Boi looks at the Showstoppers. He opens his mouth to scream, but then falls face first to the mat instead!]

Dean Knightwood: They did it. They final knocked out Big Boi!

[The Showstoppers both pick up Big Boi, and with some effort, throw him over the top rope!]

Joel: Just in time!

[Buzz]

[“I'm too sexy for my shirt
too sexy for my shirt
So sexy it hurts
And I'm too sexy for Milan
too sexy for Milan
New York and Japan
And I'm too sexy for your party
Too sexy for your party
No way I'm disco dancing”]

“I’m too Sexy” by Right Said Fred plays as Sexyking comes down to the ring!

Joel: It’s the king of Sexy!

Justin Cole: Oh god...

[Sexyking rolls into the ring. The Showstoppers are about to attack him, but he puts his hands up and says “wait wait wait wait WAIT!” The Showstoppers stop and give Sexyking a weird look. Sexyking turns around and get on the top rope. He takes off his shirt, and flexes his muscles and smiles for all his female fans.]

Dean Knighwood: What is Sexyking DOING!

Joel: He’s being sexy. Hence the name, you dumbass.

Dean Knighwood: Hey!

Joel: Sexyking is my pick to win this thing!

Justin Cole: That’s what you said about Big Boi...

Joel: No I didn’t...

[The Showstoppers look at each other. Garret Rogers climbs up on the top rope behind Sexyking and gives him a top rope reverse DDT to the mat!]

Justin Cole: He should have known better than to turn his back on the Showstoppers!

Joel: Hey, he had pose for his fans! There is nothing wrong with that!

Dean Knightwood: He should have posed before he got in the ring, or after he won. You can’t do that kind of thing in the middle of a match up.

[Garret Rogers drags Sexyking’s body to the middle of the ring. Royal gets on the top rope and leaps off with a leg drop to the throat of Sexyking.]

Dean Knightwood: That should do it. Although the top rope DDT should have done it...

[Royal picks up Sexyking and irish whips him to the ropes. Garret runs up and clotheslines Sexyking when he bounces off the ropes.]

Justin Cole: Ok, I don’t agree with this at all. You beat the man. Throw him over the top rope already! There is no need to brutalize him like this!

[Garret Rogers picks up Sexyking and goes to throw him out of the ring. Royal stops him. Royal points at Garret Rogers and then points up. Then Royal points at himself and the top rope. Garret Rogers smiles.]

Dean Knightwood: What is going on here?

[Garret Rogers puts Sexyking up on his shoulders. Royal climbs to the top rope. Royal leaps off and give Sexyking a bulldog, while Garret Rogers gives Sexyking a reverse powerbomb!]

Joel: That’s the move! They call that move “Roll Credits!” You know, cause its the end of the show!

Justin Cole: My god! Are they trying to end to poor kids career! Sexyking was just out here having some fun, and posing for the fans. There is NO call for this! The Showstoppers should be fined and or suspended!

Joel: It’s getting to be that time again!

[The Showstoppers throw Sexyking over the top rope.]

[The Showstoppers wait for their next opponent.]

[Buzz]

{“Ice Ice Baby, Ice Ice Baby
All right stop,
Collaborate and listen
Ice is back with my brand new invention
Something grabs a hold of me tightly ,br>Then I flow like a harpoon
daily and nightly Will it ever stop?
Yo -- I don't know
Turn off the lights and I'll glow
To the extreme
I rock a mat like a vandal
Light up a stage and wax a chump like a candle.”]

[“Ice Ice Baby” by Vanilla Ice plays as Iceman comes down to the ring!]

Dean Knightwood: Here comes The Iceman!

Justin Cole: Yeah, and here comes Big Boi again!

Joel: What? What is he doing back out here?

[Big Boi walks up to Sexyking and picks him up. Big Boi clubs Sexyking across the back.]

Justin Cole: Big boi has come out to attack Sexyking!

Joel: No... you think?

[Iceman is standing outside the ring. The Showstoppers are yelling at him to get in the ring.]

Dean Kinghwood: Iceman is just standing there... Why doesn’t he get in the ring?

[Iceman looks at the Showstoppers and then acts like he’s looking at a watch. He then points at the ramp and laughs at the Showstoppers.]

Joel: I get it. Iceman has seen the Showstoppers attack everyone two on one, so he’s waiting for the next person to come down hoping it will be two on two.

Justin Cole: Not a bad idea...

[Meanwhile, Big Boi is still attacking Sexyking! Big Boi picks up Sexyking and is about to punch him again, but Sexyking kicks Big Boi in the nuts! Sexyking clothslines Big Boi over the guard rail and the two fight out into the crowd!]

Dean Kinghwood: Man, it’s total chaos out there!

Joel: The Showstoppers are totally pissed! They want Iceman in the ring now!

Justin Cole: They wont have to wait long...

[Buzz]

[Police sirens blare...]

[Scott Steiners music plays as he comes out to the ring.]

Joel: Oh wow, maybe Iceman isn’t so smart after all...

[Iceman looks at Steiner, then looks in the ring at the Showstoppers. He curses to himself.]

Justin Cole: Iceman is stuck between a rock and a hard place!

[Iceman waits until Steiner is almost at ringside and then slides into the ring. Royal and Rogers jump on Iceman and start kicking him. Scott Steiner slides in the ring. Steiner gives Royal a Steinerline and then kicks Garret Rogers.]

Justin Cole: Is Scott Steiner helping Iceman?!?!

Dean Knightwood: Weird team ups happen in Battle Royals.

[Scott Steiner grabs Iceman and gives him a tiger driver.]

Joel: That alliance didn’t last long...

[Royal kicks one of the bent chairs out of the ring. Rogers and Royal set up the table they brought in the ring. Steiner is pounding on Iceman. Royal attacks Steiner from behind. Royal locks up and trys to suplex Steiner onto the table but Steiner blocks the suplex and DDT’s Royal to the mat. Garret Rogers runs up and starts kicking Steiner. Iceman helps Garret and Rogers, making it a three on one attack.]

Justin Cole: Steiner looks like he’s in trouble here.

[As Royal and Rogers continue to kick Steiner, Iceman stops. Iceman backs up and grabs Garret Rogers by the head with on hand, and grabs Royal by the head with the other. Iceman smashes their heads together!]

Joel: That’s using your head!

Dean Knightwood: Everyone is down but Iceman!

Joel: Iceman is my pick to win this thing!

Justin Cole: Didn’t you pic...

Joel: No. No I didn’t pick anyone else until now. So shut up Cole.

[Iceman picks up Royal and starts to put him over the top rope. Royal holds on to the top rope. Iceman is trying to force him over.]

Justin Cole: This could be it for Royal!

Dean Kinghtwood: Someone is coming out soon.

Justin Cole: They might be too late to save Royal.

Joel: They wouldn’t save him anyway. It’s every man for himself.

Justin Cole: I know that, I’m just saying...

Joel: Well don’t. Just don’t say anything.

[BUZZ]

[“Can't you see
I'm easily
bothered by persistence
One step from lashing out at you...
You want in
to get under my skin
And call yourself a friend
I've got more friends like you What do I do?
Is there no standard anymore?
What it takes, who I am, where I've been Belong
You can't be something you're not
Be yourself, by yourself Stay away from me”]

[“Walk” by Pantera plays as The X comes down to the ring.]

Justin Cole: Hey, it’s the X!

Joel: No really? What was your first clue?

[Royal pokes Iceman in the eye. Iceman drops Royal to the mat.]

Dean Knightwood: Royal just saved himself from being thrown out of the ring.

[The X slides into the ring. He goes to work on Scott Steiner. On the other side of the ring the Showstoppers are putting the boots to Iceman.]

Joel: Man, the Showstoppers have a plan and they are sticking too it!

Dean Knightwood: Somebody needs to team up if they want to stop the showstoppers!

Joel: Well, Iceman tried but Scott Steiner was too stupid. And the X doesn’t know what he’s doing. He just attacks anything that moves!

Justin Cole: I don’t know... Scott Steiner stopped moving a while ago and he’s still attacking him...

[As the X continues to pound away at Steiner, the Showstoppers are tying to lift Iceman over the top rope. Iceman is holing on to the ropes and kicking Royal in the head.]

Justin Cole: Iceman isn’t ready to leave the ring yet.

Joel: I would be after getting a tiger driver from Steiner.

[Iceman kicks Royal in the head one last time as Royal lets go. Iceman punches Garret Rogers and irish whips him to the ropes. Iceman dropkicks Rogers to the mat.]

Dean Knightwood: Iceman is not going down without a fight!

Joel: Here it comes!

[Buzz]

[The lights go out. Candles light the rampway.]

[“Dark lady coming out at night
Still glory She’s going to take away your life
And there’s a mess beyond the killing fields
A shock Bells ringing from the city tower
People running
Girl haunted
Death kiss walking down the long road
The world is gonna die
The time it slips away
Dark lady taking care again,
yeah Now she’s walking back to hell with just her hands
The time it slips away
The child has lost its way
The child is dead”]

[“Death Kiss” by Merciful Fate plays as Deathkiss comes down to the ring!]

Dean Kightwood: Deathkiss is the eighth person to enter the battle royal, and the first woman.

Joel: Meaning she’s going to lose.

Justin Cole: How do you figure?

Joel: She’s a girl. You don’t honestly see a girl as the World Champion, do you?

Justin Cole: Feh. What do you know?

[Deathkiss goes over and helps The X pound on Steiner.]

Dean Knightwood: Oh... Deathkiss hangs around with The X and Al Ritter... Deathkiss and The X might just be the team that could counter the Showstoppers!

[Iceman is about to dump Garret Rogers over the top rope when Royal runs over and saves him.]

Joel: Iceman can’t fight off two people at the same time.

[Deathkiss and The X are trying to get Scott Steiner over the top rope. Steiner has a good hold on the top rope.]

Joel: I don’t think they can get Steiner out of the ring at this point.

[Deathkiss bites Scott Steiner’s hand and he lets go of the rope. This enables The X to dump Steiner over the top rope.]

Joel: Did she just... BITE him!?!

Dean Knightwood: Yeah, she’s got a real problem with that...

[Garret Rogers and Royal are working over Iceman. The X and Deathkiss attack the Showstoppers.]

Justin Cole: Now the odds are a little more even.

Joel: I would have waited for the Showstoppers to eliminate Iceman first, THEN attack. This leaves it wide open for Iceman to sneak in from behind.

Dean Knighwood: Good point. I know The X wants to rip the Showstoppers apart... he might have jumped the gun here.

Joel: Hell yeah. That X is as dumb as Justin Cole looks.

[Buzz]

[“Burn, burn, burnin'
The heat is on, and it's time to move
Temperature's rising, no way out
Gone too far, can't stop now
So let me know you feel it too
When the fire gets inside of you
I wanna dance through the dark
I wanna burn
Burn, burn, burn, burn”]

[“Burning” by Eternal Eclipse plays as Brimstone walks to the ring.]

Dean Knightwood: Oh man. That’s got to be the LAST person that Iceman wanted to see.

Justin Cole: First Steiner, then Brimestone. Iceman sure has the deck stacked against him here tonight!

Joel: Wait a second... is Brimstone bringing a shovel to the ring?

Dean Knightwood: That’s what it looks like...

Joel: He can’t do that! Can he?

Justin Cole: Are you going to stop him?

[Brimstone climbs on the ring apron and steps over the top rope. He calmly walks towards Iceman. He pushes The X and Deathkiss out of his way and breaks the shovel over Iceman’s head. The Showstoppers pick up Iceman and dump him over the top rope.]

Dean Knightwood: Wow, that’s all for Iceman.

[Rock-Star Richard Royal goes to give Brimstone a high five. Brimstone catches Royal’s hand and starts to crush it. The X runs up from behind and hits Brimstone over the head with one of the bent chairs. Brimstone turns around and give the X a big boot.]

Joel: Look at him go! He’s a monster! And more of a monster than Big Boi! That is my pick to win right there! Brimstone!

Justin Cole: Didn’t yo...

Joel: NO! NOW SHUT UP!

[Brimstone picks up Deathkiss and sets her up for a burning hammer. Garret Rogers runs up and kicks Brimstone in the back of the knee. Brimstone drops Deathkiss and Garret Rogers grabs Brimstone from behind. The X give Brimstone a “Boot to the head” (superkick) the force of which causes Garret Rogers to lift Brimstone and drop him with a German Suplex through the table that was set up for Iceman!]

Dean Knightwood: Did you see that?!?

Justin Cole: What a move! Superkick/German Suplex onto a table!

[Brimstone starts to get up. Garret Rogers and The X both dropkick Brimstone, causing him to stager backwards and fall over the top rope.]

Joel: There is one downside to being so tall...

[Deathkiss and Royal start to fight, while the X and Garret Rogers turn on each other.]

Justin Cole: I feel sorry for whoever is next. It seems that the four people in the ring right now team up on the odd man out, and pair off with each other again.

Joel: Who is it going to be?

[Buzz]

[“Another nightmare about to come true
Will manifest tomorrow
Another love that I've taken from you
Lost in time, on the edge of suffering
Another taste of the evil I breed
Will level you completely
Bring to life everything that you fear
Live in the dark, and the world is threatening
Let me enlighten you
This is the way i pray”]

[“Prayer” by Disturbed plays as Al Ritter comes down to the ring.]

Justin Cole: Oh! What a weird twist of fate this is! The X’s partner is coming down now!

Dean Knightwood: Now the Showstoppers are going to get a taste of their own medicine. See how they like being outnumbered!

[Ritter runs down to the ring and slides in. He points at Deathkiss and The X, and then points at the Showstoppers. The X and Deathkiss charge the Showstoppers.]

Joel: Three on two attack! That’s not fair!

[Ritter grabs Deathkiss from behind and tosses her over the top rope.]

Justin Cole: What the hell? Why did Ritter do that?

[Deathkiss gets up and looks stunned. She starts yelling at Ritter. Ritter shrugs and says “hey, it for the title..” Deathkiss looks pissed and storms up the ramp.]

Joel: That was brilliant! Ritter made her think he was going to help her and BANG! Threw her out when she wasn’t looking!

Justin Cole: I gotta disagree with Ritter’s strategy, I would have tried to break up the Showstoppers power of two, and then do a similar two on one stratagem with X for the remainder of the Battle Royal.

Dean Knightwood: I have to disagree with you disagreeing. Deathkiss was the freshest person in the ring, and the Showstoppers are wearing down. If you can throw out someone that fresh, that quick, I say do it.

Joel: Yeah Cole, and I have to ask, you bash the Showstoppers for their two on one attack, but it would be ok if Ritter and X did it?

Justin Cole: That’s not what I said...

[Ritter throws Garret Rogers to the ropes and clotheslines him. Royal and The X have resorted to just punching each other.]

Justin Cole: These two teams have been attempting to decimate each other since the concept of CIA was born.

Dean Knightwood: The Showstopper have held the titles before, but they have been unable to capture the titles in recent weeks.

Joel: Well, they never got their one on one match! It was put to a three way match! How fair is that?

Justin Cole: If the Showstoppers are as good as they say they are, then they will get a shot sooner than later.

Joel: Yeah, it’s just first Slash and Street Boy got a shot before them, and then they never got a One team vs One team match. It’s not really fair to the Showstoppers.

[BUZZ]

[“Cut my life into pieces I've reached my last resort, suffocation, no breathing Don't give a fu** if I cut my arm bleeding”]

[“Last Resort” by Papa Roach plays as Slash comes to the ring.]

Dean Knightwood: Speaking of Slash and Street Boy, here comes Slash!

[Slash slides into the ring and spears Ritter to a loud cheer from the crowd.]

Joel: SPEAR!

[Slash hits Richard Royal with a side kick to the head that drops Royal like a sack of bricks.]

Dean Knightwood: OH MY!

Joel: Hey, what do you suppose was the last thing to go through Royals head when he got kicked?

Justin Cole: I dunno...

Joel: The right side of his face! What a kick!

[Garret Rogers runs at Slash, but Slash grabs him by the throat and plants him with a ring rocking chokeslam!]

Joel: This is unreal. Slash is my pick to win the Battle Royal!

[The X hits Slash with a double leg take down and starts punching Slash in the head. Slash rolls him over and returns the favor.]

Justin Cole: Slash and The X actually have somewhat of a history, predating CIA, and even Slash coming to ICW...

Dean Knightwood: That’s right. I was at ringside in the old CWA when Slash made his debut!

Justin Cole: The X was in CWA and took exception to Slash using an “X” as an arm symbol. X accused Slash of ripping of X, Guns and Roses, and someone else... I don’t remember exactly.

Dean Knightwood: There was a mini feud of sorts between The X and the “Unstable” and Slash and the “Warriors”.

Joel: Here comes someone!

[BUZZ]

[“God save our gracious Queen,
Long live our noble Queen,
God save the Queen!
Send her victorious,
Happy and Glorious,
Long to reign over us;
God save the Queen!
O Lord our God arise,
Scatter her enemies
And make them fall;
Confound their politics,
Frustrate their knavish tricks,
On Thee our hopes we fix,”]

[The British national anthem plays as "The British Badass" Cash stumbles down to the ring!]

Dean Knightwood: I see it... but I don’t believe it!

Joel: How... how is he still able to even walk!?!

Dean Knightwood: I don’t know... His face is covered with blood... he’s limping... one of his eyes is swollen shut.. but my god, Cash is going to fight on! He’s sucking it up and giving every last ounce he has to give because its all about one thing! The World Title!

[Cash rolls into the ring and grabs the X. Ritter is tied up with Garret Rogers. Royal runs at Slash, who hip tosses Royal over the top rope.]

Justin Cole: That will do it for Rock-Star Richard Royal! He was taken out by Slash!

[Cash is fighting for all he’s worth, but he’s in such bad shape there is not much he can do. The X scoops him up and dumps him over the top rope.]

Dean Knightwood: Looks like Cash is out as well.

Joel: Cash didn’t last very long now did he? What a loser!

Justin Cole: No, he didn’t last very long, but you have to give him all the credit in the world for just making it to the ring after the match he had earlier!

Dean Knightwood: Going back to what were talking about earlier...

Dean Knighwood: Slash was the only member of the “Warriors” to really make any kind of impact.

Justin Cole: Yeah, then there was a little stable of Ex-CWA wrestlers forming in ICW and Ritter called in Slash.

Dean Knightwood: Ritter got a hold of Slash just prior to CWA closing down. It was a good business decision. Slash has really paid off.

Joel: Who’s next?

[BUZZ]

[The theme song from “Snoopy” plays as Red Baron comes down to the ring!]

Joel: It’s the RED BARRON! Oh man I love that guy! He’s so cool! RED BARRON IS GOING TO WIN THE BATTLE ROYAL!

[The Red Barron hops into the ring and charges at Slash. Slash gives Barron a back body drop back over the top rope.]

Joel: eh....... SLASH IS GOING TO WIN THE BATTLE ROYAL!

[Garret Roger and Ritter double team Slash. Rogers grabs one of Slashes legs, and Ritter grabs the other as they try to get him over the top rope.]

Justin Cole: Wow. That is crazy. A Showstopper and Ritter working together!

Dean Knightwood: This is a battle Royal! Anything can and will happen!

[Slash is fighting off Ritter and Rogers. The X lunges in and hits Slash on the chin with a Boot to the Head, sending Slash over the top rope.]

Joel: Ritter and X, working with the Showstoppers to take out Slash...

Dean Knightwood: I told you, anything can and will happen!

Justin Cole: It was only one Showstopper anyway Joel.

Joel: Shut up Cole.

[Garret Rogers goes to high five Ritter and X, then realizes its... Ritter and X. Rogers strikes a fighting pose, but X clotheslines Rogers over the top rope.]

Dean Knightwood: Rogers is finally gone!

Justin Cole: Now Ritter and X can do the same thing The Showstoppers did and throw everyone out as they come down to the ring.

Joel: Unless someone is smart like Iceman and waits.

Justin Cole: Trust me Joel... nobody is smart like Iceman.

[Ritter shoves the X and yells at him.]

Justin Cole: What the hell?

[The X shoves Ritter back and tells him to back the fuck off. Ritter points a Rogers and then points at himself.]

Dean Knightwood: Oh, what an egomaniac! Ritter is upset that The X threw out Rogers! Ritter wanted to throw out Rogers! Oh boo woo Grow up Ritter!

[Ritter shoves the X again. The X looks at the ground. The X grabs Ritter by the hair and throws him over the top rope!]

Joel: Holy shit! The X just threw out Ritter!

[Ritter gets back in the ring when X isn’t looking and throws him over the tope rope! Ritter jumps down to the floor and starts to attack the X who fight back!]

Joel: How in the world are these two the Tag Team Champions?!?

Justin Cole: I don’t know but the ring is empty... whoever comes out next has a really good chance of winning this thing!

[BUZZ]

[“I'm too phat for my shirt too phat for my shirt So phat it hurts!”]

Joel: Sexyking? Wasn’t he already out here?

Dean Knightwood: No, didn’t you hear the lyrics?!?!

Joel: I heard them, I just didn’t listen to them...

Justin Cole: It’s the FAT MAN!!!

Joel: Oh my god its all over now!

Dean Knightwood: I might have to agree with you there Joel. Who is going to throw him over the top rope?

Justin Cole: I’d say either Slash, Big Boi, or Brimstone, but they have all come and gone.

Dean Knightwood: At this point in the match you got to believe Fat Man is a favorite to win.

Justin Cole: Can you see Fat Man as the World Champion?!?

Joel: I think it would be cool!

Justin Cole: It would be something....

Joel: That is my pick! Fat Man is my pick to win this thing!

Dean Knightwood: How far into this are we? Anyone know?

Justin Cole: Yeah, Fat Man is the 14th person to come out. So whoever comes out next will be the halfway point of the match!

Joel: Geez... It took all that time for Fat Man to waddle to the ring... he better hurry! Someone new is coming out now!

[BUZZ]

[“Well, I stand up next to a mountain,
And I chop it down with the edge of my hand.
Yeah Well, I stand up next to a mountain,
And I chop it down with the edge of my hand.
Well, I pick up all the pieces and make an island,
Might even raise a little sand.
Yeah 'Cause I'm a Voodoo chile.
Lord knows I'm a Voodoo chile baby”]

[“Voodoo Child” by Jimi Hendrix plays as Body Breaker comes down to the ring!]

Justin Cole: Oh my god... It’s the Body Breaker... Heh heh! Oh man. That poor kid...

Dean Knightwood: Hey... he’s got a baseball bat...

Joel: Sure why not? If Brimstone can have a shovel then Body Breaker can have a baseball bat!

[Fat Man is leaning on the ringpost and breathing heavily. Body Breaker runs up and smashes the baseball bat over Fat Man’s head. Fat Man drops to the ground.]

Dean Knightwood: Fat Man couldn’t move fast enough to dodge that blow!

[Body Breaker goes to pick up Fat Man, but can’t lift him.]

Justin Cole: How in the world is Body Breaker going to get Fat Man out of the ring?

Dean Knightwood: How is ANYONE going to get Fat Man out of the ring?

Joel: That’s a good point... You can easily roll him out of the ring, be he wont be eliminated without going OVER the top rope.

Justin Cole: Fat Man is going to win while he’s unconscious!

Dean Knightwood: Well, he’s had a good track record in Battle Royals so far. The one I saw he only got thrown over the top rope because the rope broke. The other one, they had to load him on a forklift.

Justin Cole: I don’t believe this is actually happening.

[Body Breaker is still trying to lift Fat Man with no luck.]

Joel: Body Breaker is going to tear his back out like that.

Justin Cole: Well if we get more people in the ring, maybe they can ALL lift Fat Man.

Joel: That’s only if they don’t fight each other, and we haven't seen much of that so far.

[BUZZ]

[“The last one survivor lies bleeding.
I kneel into his heart I settle the steel
I look through the eyes of the world
I see there's a Stranger among us.
Awaiting a sign from above
to conquer the power and the glory
Come across to the Promised Land close your eyes,
I will take your hand Through the river of steel we'll go
When the dragon lies bleeding”]

[“The Dragon Lies Bleeding” by Hammerfall plays.]

Justin Cole: What? Who the hell is that?

[Dragon runs out of the entrance way and down to the ring.]

Joel: Dragon?!? What is he doing here? I thought he went to Japan!

[Dragon gets under the ring and pulls out two ladders and a table.]

Dean Knightwood: Uh... what is he doing?

[Dragon puts the ladders and the table in the ring. He says something to Body Breaker. Dragon and Body Breaker lean the ladders against the ropes and put the tables on the ladders.]

Justin Cole: I don’t understand...

[Dragon and Body Breaker roll Fat Man over to the ladder/table.]

Dean Knightwood: I think I get it... They made a ramp! They’re going to roll Fat Man up the ramp and out of the ring!

Joel: That’s one way to get him over the top rope.

[Body Breaker tells Dragon to stop.]

Dean Knightwood: What’s going on? Did Body Breaker change his mind?

[Body Breaker has Dragon move to the side, and Body Breaker tries to roll Fat Man up the ramp on his own.]

Justin Cole: Can he do it by himself?

[Body Breaker gets Fat Man halfway up the ramp, and then Fat Man rolls back down crushing Body Breaker. Dragon laughs.]

Joel: Oh man. Classic.

[Dragon helps Body Breaker out from under Fat Man.]

[BUZZ]

[““Follow your nose, it always knows
the flavor of death where ever it goes,
Terror in the supermarket, shoppers are in horror,
Shredded boxes in the aisles, corpses on the floor,
Those who ran, this joy is mine,
now they're going to pay,
Super gory slaughter now the order of the day!
Toucan Son of Sam!!”

[“Cereal Killer” by Green Jelly plays as Cereal Killer runs down to the ring!]

Justin Cole: Here comes the Cereal Killer!

[Cereal Killer slides in the ring. Dragon starts giving orders to Body Breaker and Cereal Killer. Dragon, Cereal Killer, and Dragon try to roll Fat Man up the ramp. They get halfway up and can’t get Fat Man any farther.]

Joel: This is some fucked up shit right here.

Dean Knightwood: How the hell are they going to get him out of the ring.

[Dragon leans on the turnbuckle and thinks, while Body Breaker and Cereal Killer talk. Dragon looks like he has an idea. He gives Breaker and Killer more orders.]

Justin Cole: I wonder what Dragon has up his sleeve this time...

“Dragon, Body Breaker, and Cereal Killer roll Fat Man on the bottom of the ramp. Body Breaker and Cereal Killer go to the top of the ramp and start jumping up and down on it. The table doesn’t break because the ladders are under it. Dragon reaches down and lifts up the bottom of the ramp. The weight of Body Breaker and Cereal Killer sends the ramp flipping over, causing Body Breaker, Cereal Killer and Fat Man to all fall outside the ring. Dragon points and laughs.]

Dean Knightwood: Dragon just outsmarted Body Breaker and Cereal Killer!

Joel: Yeah... and?

[Dragon sits on the top rope and waits for the next person to come out.]

Dean Knightwood: I can’t believe Dragon eliminated three people with one move!

Joel: What else is going to happen here?

[BUZZ]

[“Right wing commies
Leftist nazis
Point their finges
Rumors linger

I don't’ care
What you think

Branded sexist
labeled racist
want it clearer check the mirror

lies and slander
in vain try to shame me
riots, protests, violence
just makes me famous!
TV interviews, free publicity
increase tee shirt sales dramatically!”]

[“I hate everyone” (Custom Jeebus Mix) by Typo O Negative plays as Jeebus comes down to the ring.]

Justin Cole: This should be... interesting...

[Jeebus and Dragon stand nose to nose talking.]

Dean Knightwood: You suppose they’re talking strategy, or talking trash?

[Jeebus takes Dragon off his feet with a short-arm clothesline.]

Joel: I’d say “Talking Trash”

[Dragon gets up. Dragon kicks Jeebus in the groin.]

Dean Knightwood: Everyone does that when Jeebus is in the ring...

[Dragon off the ropes, Jeebus approaches, and Dragon hits him with a clothesline. Jeebus climbs to his feet. Flying side kick by Dragon takes Jeebus off his feet. Jeebus is up again. Jeebus kicks Dragon in the stomach. Then Jeebus grabs Dragon's waist and executes a gut-wrench suplex.]

Justin Cole: These guys arn’t pussy footing around. This is the hardest hitting “Wrestling” action we’ve seen in the rumble this far.

[Dragon slaps the face of Jeebus. Jeebus grabs Dragon's leg and takes him down. Dragon gets thrown into the turnbuckle. Jeebus comes at him and drills him with the splash.]

Dean Knightwood: Hard hitting is right. These guys are FIGHTING for a chance to hold the CIA World Title!

[Dragon, dazed by the slash, stagers out of the corner. Jeebus superkicks Dragon. Jeebus trys to deposit Dragon over the top rope, but Dragon hold on to the ropes.]

Dean Knightwood: Dragon isn’t done yet.

[Dragon gets back in the ring. Dragon tackles and begins punching Jeebus.]

[Dragon kicks Jeebus on the mat.]

Joel: Here comes another one!

[BUZZ]

[“From nothing we have risen and from nothing we still rise
Take your life back
Fight, fight
Will you fight to take your life back?
Ask yourself what's truly yours in life
Are you in control or someone's slave?
All that you cherish, all that you love
In the blink of an eye can be taken from you
In moments of tragedy we bond
And in weakness clarity thrives
I've been blessed with the inspiration
To take what little I have and always strive “]

[“Hollow Ground” by Hatebreed plays as Crisis comes down to the ring.]

Justin Cole: It’s Crisis!

Dean Knightwood: He doesn’t look anywhere near as bad as Cash looked, but you know he’s not 100% and you know he’s hurting!

[Crisis slides in the ring and hits Jeebus from behind. Crisis pokes Jeebus in the eye with his thumb. ] Dean Knightwood - Crisis executes a thumb to the eye.

Joel: A favorite move of mine.

Dean Knightwood: I bet it is.

Joel: Have I mentioned that Dragon is my pick to win this thing?

Justin Cole: ...

[Crisis and Jeebus are punching each other. Dragon jumps off of the top turnbuckle with a twisting moonsault, hitting Crisis and Jeebus, sending everyone down to the mat.]

Justin Cole: Dragon took advantage of Jeebus being distracted and scored with a high flying move!

Dean Knightwood: Yeah but everyone is down, even Dragon!

[Crisis gets back to his feet. Crisis comes from behind and bulldogs Jeebus. A flying bodypress by Dragon takes Crisis to the mat with authority. Jeebus sweep kicks Dragon from the mat.]

Justin Cole: Well, everyone WAS getting up, but they’re all back on the mat...

[Crisis grabs Jeebus's head and bites him in the face. Jeebus stagers backwards... Dragon delivers a huge Soviet Suplex sending Jeebus onto the mat.]

Dean Knightwood: Soviet Strike Suplex! What’s next? A Bourbon Bomb? Digatal Devise?!? ANT HARDY BOMB!?!?!

Joel: Calm down man, people use other peoples moves all the time...

Joel - Dragon's momma would be proud! 4

Justin Cole: What?

Joel: Nevermind....

[Crisis picks up Dragon and scoop slams him on the mat. Crisis grabs Dragon with a grapevine submission hold on his leg. Jeebus comes over and starts kicking Dragon’s leg.]

Justin Cole: Dragon being Double Teamed now.

[Buzz]

[“Hail to the Chief
we have chos-en for the na - tion, Hail to the Chief!
We sa-lute him, one and all”]

[“Hail to the Chief” plays as Richard Bregnard comes out to the ring.]

Joel: It’s the Chef of Staff! He’s the greatest! I think he’s going to win the whole Rumble!!!

Justin Cole: You would...

[Bregnard gets in the ring. Jeebus kicks Bregnard in the stomach. Jeebus brought down with a leg sweep by Bregnard. Bregnard sucks chants start in the crowd.]

Dean Knightwood: Richard Bregnard is not very popular here in Boston.

Justin Cole: I don’t think he’s very popular anywhere...

[Dragon pulls a blade out of his boot and cuts Bregnard. Bregnard is bleeding as a result.] Justin Cole - The mat is covered with blood from that injury.

Dean Knightwood: I bet Bregnard regrets entering the rumble now!

Joel: That’s just not right.

[Jeebus whips Dragon into the corner, then comes up and smashes Dragon's head into the turnbuckle. Bergnard attacks Jeebus from behind. Jeebus chokes Bergnard. Crisis with a headbutt on Bergnard. In an attempt to even the match, Bergnard rakes Crisis's face. ] Joel - This is insane! Bergnard is trying to fight three people!

[Crisis grabs Bergnard’s leg and takes him down. Crisis flies from the turnbuckle with an elbowdrop.]

[Crisis reaches around Chit Bergnard's shoulder, then reaches under his leg, and T-Bone suplexes him. Crisis chants start.]

3 Joel - My God! Bergnard could be killed!

[Dragon drop kicks Jeebus. Crisis DDTs Bergnard.]

Joel: It’s all out warfare!

[BUZZ]

[“Now
Let the bodies hit the floor
Push me again
This is the end
Skin against skin blood and bone
You're all by yourself but you're not alone
You wanted in now you're here
Driven by hate consumed by fear
Let the bodies hit the floor”]

[“BODIES” by Drowning pool plays as Johnny Justice comes to the ring.]

Joel: It’s.. It’s... who the hell is that?

Justin Cole: It’s Johnny Justice. From EOF?

Joel: When did he come to the CIA?

Justin Cole: Like, last week. Didn’t you see his promo?

Joel: Uh.. no...

Justin Cole: Try to pay more attention next time.

[Johnny Justice runs into the ring and attacks Jeebus. Jeebus pushes him down. Johnny Justice comes right back and starts attacking Jeebus again. On the other side of the ring, Crisis and Dragon almost have Bergnard over the top rope.]

Dean Knightwood: Looks like this might be the end of the line for Bergnard.

[Johnny Justice punches Jeebus a few times and whips him to the ropes. Johnny Justice dropkicks Jeebus.]

Joel: We are only 2/3rds of the way through this thing.

Dean Knightwood: What in the world is going to happen next?

Joel: Another count down? Is it just me or are these countdowns coming faster and faster?

Justin Cole: You must be tripping.

Joel: Are you sure?

Justin Cole: Yeah.

Joel: I wonder who’s left to come out still?

[BUZZ]

[“I’m Watching you!” is heard, followed by an instrumental version of “Wild Thing” as Wolf comes down to the ring.]

Dean Knighwood: Here comes Wolf.

Joel: That guy is a total nutcase.

[Wolf gets in the ring and pushes Johnny Justice out of his way to get to Jeebus. Somehow Bergnard has fought off Dragon and Crisis. Bergnard is on the mat, hiding by the turnbuckle while Dragon and Crisis fight each other.]

Justin Cole: What is Bergnard doing?

Joel: He’s laying low! He’s going to let everyone knock each other out and then come in from behind!

[Wolf has Jeebus backed up in a corner and his pounding on him. Johnny Justice walks up, pushes Wolf aside, and starts kicking Jeebus. Wolf pushes Johnny down and goes back to punching Jeebus in the head. Johnny locks up with Wolf. Jeebus grabs both of them and rams their heads together.]

Dean Knightwood: Wow, the ring is really filling up now.

Joel: How many people still need to come out?

[Dragon bounces off the ropes and floors Crisis with a double foot drop kick. Dragon walks over to the corner that Bergnard is in and kicks him a few times, then goes back to fighting with Crisis.]

Justin Cole: I think seven or eight people are still coming out at some point.

Joel: And we’ve got six people in the ring right now.

Dean Knightwood: Soon to be seven.

Joel: This action is getting hard to keep track of...

Justin Cole: It would be for you...

[BUZZ]

[Some weird Buddest music plays as The Great Buddah comes out to the ring.]

Justin Cole: The Great Buddah!

[Buddah gets in the ring. He walks over the Bergnard who is still sitting down in the corner. Buddah stomps on him for a while and then walks away to find someone else to beat on.]

Dean Knightwood: I don’t get what Bergnard is doing...

Joel: I told you... laying low. Saving his strength.

Justin Cole: Yeah, but he’s getting the crap kicked out of him ever two seconds...

Dean Knightwood: Maybe his leg is broken?

Joel: NO DAMN IT! IT’S FREAKING STRATEGY!

[Buddah walks over and starts attacking Johnny Justice. Wolf and Jeebus are still going at it. Jeebus has Wolf tied up in the ropes and his chopping away at him. Bergnard is in the corner still.]

Dean Knightwood: I think his leg is broken.

Justin Cole: Maybe he’s dead?

Dean Knightwood: We can only hope.

Joel: Hey!

[Crisis suplexs Dragon. Crisis gets up and walks over to Bergnard. He kicks Bergnard a few times and then runs across the ring and leg drops Dragon. Crisis gets up and starts kicking Dragon in the head.]

Justin Cole: Dragon has been in the ring the longest at this point.

[The Great Buddah piledrives Johnny Justice to the mat. Jeebus gets out of the ropes and kick Wolf in the nuts. Jeebus walks over and starts kicking Bergnard.]

Dean Knightwood: For the love of god Bergnard, get up and defend yourself!

Joel: Damn it, he’s playing possom!

Justin Cole: No he’s not, he’s freaking dead!

Joel: There’s no talking to you is there Cole!

Justin Cole: We’ve got seven bodys in the ring now, here comes one more!

[BUZZ]

[“Attack like a rottweiler, But worse den a rottweiler, Cause Da rottweiler is soft. REALLY,
GET SMACKED SILLY,
YOU GET SMACKED SILLY,
FUCKIN THESE PEEPS FROM THE,
WHAT YOU GONNA DO WHEN YOU READY,
SHIT I WAS BORN READY,
I WAS ALL READY,
YO I CAN COACH YA,
ATTACK LIKE A VULTURE.”]

[A P.Diddy song plays a Drake Steele comes down to the ring.]

Justin Cole: It’s the man of Steele!

[Drake Steele slides in the ring and walks over to kick Bergnard a few times. Drake turns around and Jeebus tackles him. Jeebus starts punching Drake Steele repeatedly!]

Dean Knightwood: Whoa! Jeebus snapped!

[Johnny Justice walks over and pulls Jeebus off of Drake Steele. Drake grabs Johnny and tosses him over the top rope, then tackles Jeebus from behind and starts punching him in the back of the head.]

Joel: Drake Steele just eliminated Johnny Justice!

Dean Knightwood: Now he’s going to work on Jeebus.

[Wolf picks up Bergnard, gives him a “rock bottom” and then slides Bergnard back in the corner. Wolf walks away to attack The Great Buddah, and Dragon comes over to kick at Bergnard.]

[Crisis runs at Dragon. Dragon turns around and flips Crisis over the top rope. Crisis hangs onto the ropes and lands on the ring apron.]

Justin Cole: That was a close call!

Dean Knightwood: Crisis had better get back in the ring!

[Dragon punches at Crisis, but Crisis blocks the punch. Wolf sneaks up and goes to shoulderblock Dragon, but Dragon moves and Wolf knocks Crisis off the ring apron and too the floor.]

Justin Cole: Wolf was going to knock out Dragon and Crisis, but Dragon moved out of the way, and Wolf just got Crisis!

Joel: Did I tell you that Bergnard is going to win? Because he is.

[BUZZ]

[“Hey Al, you ready?
Let's do it
{*music starts*}
Mmm, yeah, uhh.. Yeah, uhh.. c'mon
Who's the boss? Dudes is lost
Don't think cause I'm iced out,
I'm a cool off Who else but me?
(who else?)
And if you don't feel me
that mean you can't touch me,
it's ugly,
trust me
Get it right dawg, we ain't ever left
We just, moved in silence and rep to the death
(yeah)
It's official, I survived what I been through
Y'all got drama,
"The Saga Continues..."

We ain't,
go-in nowhere,
we ain't,
goin nowhere
We can't be stopped now,
cause it's Bad Boy for life
We ain't,
go-in nowhere,
we ain't,
goin nowhere
We can't be stopped now,
cause it's Bad Boy for life”

[“Bad Boys for Life” plays as Street Boy runs down to the ring.]

Joel: Hey, it’s one half of the former tag team champions of the World!

[Street Boy runs over to Bergnard and drop kicks him in the face. He then runs over and starts kicking at Dragon.]

Justin Cole: Dragon has got to be running out of gas by now.

[Drake Steele has Jeebus set up on the top rope. Drake executes a top rope suplex on Jeebus.]

Dean Knightwood: Jeebus has been in the ring for quite a while also!

[Wolf has climbed up on The Great Buddah’s shoulders and is punching Buddah on both sides of his head.]

Justin Cole: Wolf is brutalizing TGB!

[Dragon trips up Street Boy and puts him in a sharpshooter! Drake Steele walks over and puts Street Boy in a crossface type move.]

Dean Knightwood: Double submissions! Wearing out the fresh man in the ring.

[The Great Buddah falls backwards, crushing Wolf who was on his shoulders. The Great Buddah climbs up to the top rope and crushes Wolf again with a big splash!]

Joel: Oh! Wolf is street pizza!

[The Great Buddah is climbing the top rope again. Drake Steele runs over and pushes Buddah off the top rope and too the floor. Drake yells at him to “Wait til Friday, I've got something for ya!”]

Justin Cole: Drake Steele just took The Great Buddah out of the Battle Royal!

[Drake peels Wolf off the mat and goes to throw him over the top rope. Somehow, Wolf grabs the rope and swings back in the ring between the bottom and second ropes.]

Dean Knightwood: I was sure Wolf was going out right there!

[Dragon lets Street Boy out of the Sharpshooter. Dragon gets on the top rope and hits Street Boy with summersault legdrop.]

Justin Cole: That was a big risk by Dragon, especially with TGB getting eliminated when he went to the top rope like that!

Joel: We’re getting down to the wire now. Not many CIA stars are left to come out!

[BUZZ]

[“Getadelt wird wer Schmerzen
kennt vom Feuer das die Haut
verbrennt Ich werf ein Licht in mein
Gesicht Ein heisser Schrei Feuer frei!
Bang bang
Geadelt ist wer Schmerzen kennt vom
Feuer das in Lust verbrennt ein
Funkenstoss in ihren Schoss ein heisser
Schrei Feuer frei! Bang bang Feuer frei!”]

[“Feuer Frei !” by RAMMSTEIN plays as Prime Offender comes down to the ring.]

Justin Cole: It’s Prime Offender, the Insane Champion!

[Prime Offender goes in the ring. He walks over to Bergnard and kicks him a few times. PO shrugs his shoulders, picks up Bergnard and throws him over the top rope.]

Joel: NO!!!!!!!

[Wolf sees Prime Offender and starts attacking him right away!]

Dean Knightwood: Wolf is all over Prime Offender!

Joel: I would be too if he shaved my head!

[Dragon has Drake Steele locked into a side head lock.]

Justin Cole: Isn’t a Drake a kind of Dragon?

Joel: I don’t know...

[Jeebus picks up Street Boy and drops him to the mat with a facebuster.]

Joel: You know what? Only five people have ever held the ICW World Title, and the only three on the CIA roster are all in the ring right now!

[Wolf gets thrown into the turnbuckle. PO comes over and smashes Wolf's head into it. Prime Offender puts Wolf on the turnbuckle and executes a belly-to-belly superplex. PO is up again. Prime Offender executes the front facelock on Wolf.]

Justin Cole: Wolf has got to be worn out. First getting smashed by TGB, and now the fresh Prime Offender is working him over.

[Drake Steele hits a koppo kick on Dragon. Dragon climbs to his feet. Steele is recieving a headlock from Dragon. Dragon drops and spins, taking Steele to the mat. Dragon leg drops Steele in the small of the back.]

Justin Cole: Dragon is still in there, he’s been in for what seems like hours!

[Jeebus pokes Street Boy in the eye with his thumb. Street Boy knife edge chops Jeebus. Jeebus grabs Street Boy's leg and takes him down. Street Boy pulls Jeebus to the mat with a corkscrew armdrag. Street Boy jumps and elbow smashes the lying Jeebus.]

Dean Knightwood: Street Boy is holding his own with Jeebus, who has been in almost as long as Dragon has!

[Wolf takes Prime Offender down with a knee. Prime Offender gets hit with a diving elbow smash from Wolf.]

[Jeebus superkicks Street Boy. Jeebus with an impressive flying spinning leg lariat on Street Boy. Jeebus moves back to his feet. Jeebus hits Street Boy with an elbowdrop.]

[Prime Offender runs up to the lying Wolf, and does a sommersault, legdropping Wolf across the chest. ]

[Dragon is choking Drake Steele with the ropes.]

Joel: Buzz!

[BUZZ]

[Hardbodys music plays as she comes to the ring.]

Joel: Here comes the former Underworld Champion!

[Hardbody slides in the ring and goes after Drake Steele first thing.]

Justin Cole: Oh yeah, Hardbody has a score to settle with Drake Steele.

[Dragon backs away from Steele and Hardbody. Dragon looks at Street Boy and Jeebus, then looks at Prime Offender and Wolf. Dragon thinks for a second and then runs at Wolf and Prime Offender. He hits them so hard, all three fall over the top rope!]

Joel: Oh no!

[Prime Offender and Wolf are hanging on the top rope. Dragon is holding onto Wolf. They are all on the outside of the ring dangling over the floor. Prime Offender kicks Dragon a few times and Dragon losses his grip on Wolf and falls to the floor. Wolf slides back in the ring, and so does Prime Offender.]

[Street Boy bounces Jeebus off the ropes and hits him with a back body drop.]

[Prime Offender is brought onto his head via a craddle DDT by Wolf. Wolf stands up. PO on the mat, and Wolf with a measured fist drop. Prime Offender can't breathe after a sitdown splash by Wolf hits him in the chest.]

[Hardbody gets flipped over the top rope by Drake Steele]

Joel: That does it for Hardbody!

Justin Cole: Five people in the ring, three of whom are former ICW World Champions!

[BUZZ]

[“Learn to evolve with the new transition
To act upon a hypocritical vision
Discard the old - in with the new
Discard the old - in with the fashion
Learn to evolve with the new transition
To act upon a hypocritical vision
Learn to evolve, learn to, learn to evolve”]

Joel: What the hell? Who’s music is that?

Justin Cole: Damned if I know...

[A huge man comes running down to the ring. He looks familiar...]

Joel: Who the F...?

Justin Cole: Holy shit, it’s Tonner!

Joel: Who?

Justin Cole: The first ICW World Champion!

[Tonner runs in the ring and grabs Jeebus from behind, drilling his head to the mat with a reverse DDT.]

Justin Cole: This is just so surreal. This whole night has been weird. Returns, title changes...

[Tonner and Street Boy are stomping on Jeebus. Prime Offender comes over and kicks Street Boy in the neck. Then Prime Offender clothslines Tonner over the top rope.]

Joel: Ha ha! So much for Tonner’s big return!

[Prime Offender gives Tonner the finger and then turns around to throw Wolf out. Wolf spears PO.]

Dean Knightwood: Wolf has gotten his second wind!

[Jeebus comes up and trys to deposit Drake Steele over the top rope. Drake Steele is holding on. Street Boy comes over to help Jeebus. Drake is still holding on.]

Dean Knightwood: Drake is holding on for all he’s worth.

[Wolf kicks Prime Offender in the nuts. Wolf comes over and helps Jeebus and Street Boy. The three finally get Drake Steele over the top rope and out of the ring.]

Justin Cole: That ends the night for Drake Steele.

[Wolf and Jeebus turn on each other as Street Boy dives for cover.]

Joel: Is this the last person?

[BUZZ]

[“All my friends drive a lowrider.
The low-ride-r is a little higher
low-rid-er, drives a little slower
low-rid-er is a little colder
low-rid-er knows every street yea
low-rid-er doesnt wanna meet ya
low-rid-er dont use no gas
low-rid-er dont drive to fast
take a little trip take a little trip take a little trip to see
take a little trip take a little trip take a little trip with me”

[“Lowrider” plays as Phantasmo Jr. Comes down to the ring.]

Justin Cole: The second generation high flyer from Mexico!

[Jeebus twists Wolf's arm, jumps, and dropkicks Wolf to the ground. Jeebus climbs to his feet. Jeebus hits Wolf with an elbowdrop from the second turnbuckle. ]

Dean Knightwood: Jeebus going to work on Wolf!

Joel - This is quality sports entertainment!

[Jeebus lifts up Wolf and delivers a gut-wrench power bomb. ]

Dean Knightwood - Good gut-wrench powerbomb by Jeebus.

[ PO jabs Phantasmo Jr.. Prime Offender takes a cheap shot with a kick to the groin. Phantasmo Jr. goes for a flying forearm but Street Boy dodges the attack. Phantasmo Jr. dropkicks PO to the knee. ]

Justin Cole: It’s just a mess in the ring at this point. Everyone is tired and it’s getting down to the end!

[Prime Offender with a quick jab to Phantasmo Jr.'s chin. Jeebus piledrives Street Boy into the mat. ]

Justin Cole: What? We DO have one more person coming out!

Joel: Who hasn’t come out yet?

Dean Knightwood: I know!

Justin Cole: yeah... me too!

Joel: Who?

[Buzz]

[“and they came to the river
and they came from the road
and he wanted the sun
just to call his own
and they walked on the dirt
and they walked from the road '
til they came to the river '
til they came up close
Throw your pain in the river
To be washed away slow
and we walked without words
and we walked with our lives
two silent birds circled by
Like our pain in the river”]

[“The River” by Spahn Ranch plays as Clint Rezner comes to the ring.]

Joel: This is it! One of the six men in the ring right now is going to be the CIA World Champion!

[Clint Rezner gets in the ring. Wolf charges at him and rams Clint so hard that they both go over the top rope!]

Joel: What the hell?

Justin Cole: Tonner was in the ring longer than Clint was!

PO knife edge chops Phantasmo Jr.. Prime Offender catches Phantasmo Jr.'s leg, but Phantasmo Jr. reverses it with an enzuigiri to Prime Offender's head.]

Dean Knightwood: Prime Offender is down!

[Prime Offender unleashes the Canadian backbreaker on Street Boy. Phantasmo Jr. dives off the top rope with a somersault bodyblock, taking the wind out of PO. Phantasmo Jr. is back on his feet. Phantasmo Jr.'s senton splash from the top rope nails Prime Offender in the chest.]

Justin Cole: Prime Offender is getting abused here!

[Prime Offender gets up, says something that sounds like “fuck this shit” and grabs Phantasmo Jr. Prime Offender lifts him over his head and throws him into the third row of the fans.]

Joel: Wow, did you see that!

Dean Knightwood: Looks like Phantasmo Jr. is out!

Justin Cole: It’s down to Jeebus, Street Boy, and Prime Offender!

[ PO punches Jeebus in the mouth after Jeebus pulled his hair. Jeebus, still standing, holds his sack after Prime Offender winded back and kicked him in the groin. Jeebus's head pops back from the jab thrown by Prime Offender. Jeebus spins around, then mule kicks PO in the groin.]

Justin Cole: Jeebus and Prime Offender are killing each other!

[Jeebus rears back and clothslines Prime Offender over the top rope. Prime Offender grabs onto Jeebus and they both flip over the top rope to the floor.]

(Ding Ding Ding)

Joel: OH MY GOD.

Justin Cole: You have got to be shiting me.

Dean Knightwood: This is all a dream, isn’t it?

[Street Boy is standing in the middle of the ring, blood and beaten. He’s looking around. He doesn't realize what has happened yet. His theme music is playing. Slash runs down to the ring. Slash lifts Street Boy on his shoulders and walks around the ring. Balloons fall from the sky. Jeebus and Prime Offender are still trying to kill each other!]

Justin Cole: HE DID IT! STREET BOY HAS DONE THE IMPOSSIBLE! HE HAS WON THE CIA WORLD TITLE! EVER SINCE HE WAS A LITTLE KID, ALL HE WANTED WAS TO HAVE A TITLE! HE GREW UP SLEEPING ON THE STREET! HE HAD NOTHING BUT DREAMS AND NOW HIS DREAM HAS COME TRUE! STREET BOY IS A CHAMPION! STREET BOY IS THE CHAMPION! REST EASY STREET BOY, YOU’VE MADE YOUR MOTHER PROUD!!! FANS, THIS IS THAT LAST THING I SAW COMING! TUNE INTO CRACKDOWN TO SEE WHAT HAPPENS NEXT!!! GOODNIGHT EVERYONE!

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