"Now I Can See That Were Falling Apart"

Brian Littrell removed his glasses from his face, and rubbed his old eyes

softy. The days have passed and seasons of the past returned to him. He 
placed his trembling, wrinkled hand on the arm rest, and pushed himself 
slowly up. The room was covered in memories of the days he was with the 
Backstreet Boys. The group that helped him see the world, have
adventures, and make friends he`d never forget. 50 years have past, but the memories
of the happy and not so happy days, stuck in Brian`s mind. He was 74 now,
but healthy for his age. His heart never gave out on him, even through all
the pain it had caused him. Brian placed his golf hat on his head, and slowly
bent to pick up his bag. He was off to Orlando, to see his old Backstreet
friends, and say good-bye to one of them, forever. 

The old Trans Con building smelled of cigarettes and dust. Nick Carter
slowly sat down in the old leather couch in the TV room, and placed his cain
next to him. 69 years old, Nick thought about the days that helped him become a
man at the tender age of 14. At 20, Nick lost a leg in a tragic motorcycle 
accident, but survived through many other mishaps in his life after.
Looking around the old studio that made him remember the famous days, he felt a
rush of sadness overtake him. Backstreet Boys lasted as long as it could,
until the music just stopped one day without warning. Nick heard the door in
the front lobby open, and he struggled to stand on his one good leg with the
help of his cain. Aaron Carter, Nick`s younger brother stood at the hall
entrance and smiled at his nervous brother. "I think AJ is here." he said quietly.
Aaron was the younger version of Nick. At 61, Aaron too had memories of 
Grammy`s and World Music Awards. His Career took off in the Millennium,
and just as the Backstreet Boys, would never be forgotten. Nick took a deep 
breath and slowly started his way to the outside. 

AJ Mclean, 71 years old, was a man who`s life would stun Madonna. Married
six times, he could make cross dressers stop in the streets of New York. He
never let his dressing gift leave him, and he still wore his funny cow boy hats
and furry pants. Nick made his way outside and saw AJ lifting something out
of his car. Nick laughed to see AJ`s grandson Gab jump from AJ`s arms. 

"I can do it!" he said jumping out of the car and running around the
parking Lot. 

"Something reminds me of him.." Nick said startling AJ. 

AJ walked slowly up to Nick and grabbed him into a hug. "You look good,
Man," AJ said from behind his sun glasses. 

Nick laughed and looked at AJ`s wrinkled tattoos. "You look the same, but
wrinkled." he joked pointing to one of AJ`s many body parts. 

"Shh..my brother, wrinkled is sexy." 

"Granddad...." AJ looked down into the face of his 4 year old grandson. 
"There's a man over there who needs your help." AJ looked over to the
porsche parked across the parking lot. Howie Dorough`s curly hair could be
recognized from the Statue of Liberty. He waved at Nick and AJ and waited for a 
response. 

"75 and still can't do things on his own," Nick chuckled and walked
slowly over to Howie. 

"This bag is heavy, Nicky," Howie said, trying his might to pick up a
golf bag with a sock hanging from it. 

Nick hugged Howie and gave out another chuckle. "Still need me to help
you with everything, D!" 

Howie laughed quietly and winked at his old friend. "How's the leg?" 

Nick hit his metal side with his cain. "Still echoing." 

The 3 made their way into the studio and sat down in the kitchen. AJ
poured himself some coffee and handed Gab a juice box. "Go watch TV in the other
room, kid." Gab ran out of the room, sipping his drink. 

"Some kid you got there, stud." Howie laughed pouring himself some
coffee. 
AJ gave him a look. "He's my grandson. I don't think sperm can live for
71 years. At least not with the rate I was going." 

Nick laughed quietly sipping his coffee. "We look so old. It's like we
are young guys in old men bodies." 

AJ gave Nick a look "Who said I was old? You farts may be, but I'm still 
Bone." The three laughed, but stopped as they saw Brian standing at the 
doorway grinning at them. 

"All this way, on my old legs and all I get are goggled eyes." 

Nick wabbled over to Brian and grabbed him into a hug. "So good to see
you, man. So good." 

Brian grabbed Nick tight. "Little bro ain't so little anymore." 

A tear ran down Nick`s face. "I am still your bro, man" 

The two faced each other all emotional and shocked. "Didn't think you
could cry after 40." Brian joked, and Nick laughed wiping away the water. 

"Yup, sure can." 

Everyone got all reacquainted and sat down at the round table in the
middle of the kitchen looking each other in silence. Brian sighed and laughed 
quietly as he removed his specs to wipe his old eyes. "We sure look
rusty." 

AJ sipped his coffee. "I blame it on my third wife." The table laughed
and AJ looked wide eyed. "Im serious," he chuckled. 

Nick shook his head. "So, tell me fellas, what happened since we last
spoke?" 

Brian put his hand on Nick`s shoulder, "48 years." The table laughed
again. 
"I married Leighanne," continued Brian, "and then we separated three
years later. I remarried, and Nicky past away a few years ago. We have three 
beautiful children. Scott, he is 34 now and runs a small restaurant in 
Kentucky. He gave me two wonderful grandkids. Alice is 36. She models for
Kelvin Klein. She hasn't given me children, but for her age, she has a
great life and I`m happy for her. Then there is Nick..." Brian gave Nick a
loving look."We named him after you. He`s 48. Leighanne and I had a child before
we divorced, and that's him. He lives in North Carolina where he owns a
hotel." 

AJ looked at Brian. "Any kids of his own?" 

Brian gave AJ a look. "Nick is a homosexual. He married a man and they
bought a dog." The table gave a small giggle. Brian laughed to himself. "He's a 
great kid." 

AJ sipped his coffee. "I had two kids. Me and Amanda had Matthew. He's 42
now and runs a small company in Boston. He doesn't have kids either. My
fourth wife Kerrie and I had Alex. He's Gab`s dad. That's all. I tried hard to 
control myself." 

Nick laughed quietly and gave AJ a playful look. "I can see that from
your pants." 

AJ raised his gray eyebrows. "What about you, asshole?" 

Nick sighed. "Shanna passed on in 2004, and I never remarried. We had one
child, Angela, who is 48 now. She is a very beautiful women. She married
a congressman, and they have two kids. Billy and Sammy. They live in 
Washington. I never see them, but they call every now and then." 
Brian put his coffee down and scratched his white hair. "Shanna?" 
Nick closed his eyes from the pain. "My wife. She died in a car
accident." Nick removed his wallet from his back pants pocket and opened it with his
trembling hang to show them a picture of a beautiful girl. "That was a
long time ago. I took her to her senior prom. I loved her. I still do. That's
why I never remarried." Nick felt emotion stumble from his voice and looked
up into the old faces of his friends. 

Brian placed his hand on Nick`s arm and squeezed it. "You are a true
husband, Frack." Nick gave Brian a warm smile. 
The table became lost in quiet memories, and they all looked at Howie.
"What about you, D?" Nick said sipping his coffee. 

Howie`s old features wrinkled. He appeared nervous a moment and moved
back in his chair. "I married a women named Marie. We never had children. She
wasn't able to have any. I loved her though, and we have a wonderful life
together." 

Brian smiled and gave Howie a pat on his back. "Good for you." 

The four guys stopped to look at the empty chair next to AJ. AJ stood up 
slowly and stretched his back. "We should go now." He said quietly. 

The cemetry was springing with flowers and trees. The four looked
astonished at how much life could be living there. "Do you see it?" Nick said slowly
limping behind with his right hand gripping his cain. 

"Granddad, what are we doing here?" Gab asked pulling on AJ`s arm. 

"Saying good-bye to an old friend." AJ whispered, running his hand on the
top of his grandchild`s head. 

"I found it!" Howie yelled from around the tree. The four came over and 
looked down at a gray tombstone marked "In loving memory of our big
brother, Kevin Richardson". Gab ran off to play in the nearby park and AJ yelled 
after, "Don't leave that area!" He looked back down at the flower-covered
grave. 

Brian got on his knees and cried. He had not cried like this since his
wife had passed on, and emotions were running through him from all different 
directions. Kevin died six years ago. He was rushed to the Orlando
hospital and was announced to have died from stress and heat exhaustion. The four
had gotten the news, and each felt as if part of himself had died along with
Kev. 
AJ and Nick had made the funeral, but Brian was off on a rerival with his
church, and Howie was speaking in London for the 45 Years of Music
festival. 
This was the first time all five of them were together again. Brian
removed his glasses and held his face in his trembling hands. Nick placed a hand
on his shoulder and wiped a tear from his old nose. Brian looked at his
cousin`s grave again and touched the grave imprints. 

"NOW I SEE THAT WE`RE FALLING APART FROM THE WAY THAT IT USED TO BE..." 

The other fellas listened to Brian begin the song and AJ joined in. 

"No matter the distance..I want you to know....that deep down inside of 
me....." 

Then Howie started in. 

"You are my fire, the one desired..you are... 

Then they all started in unison....when Nick belted out... 

"DON'T WANNA HEAR YOU SAYYYYYYY" 

They continued singing the rest of the song, and AJ finished it, with a
tear running down his wrinkled chin. Nick helped Brian to his feet. "Good-bye 
cuz..." Brian said as they all gave a last look at their oldest member of
what once was the Backstreet Boys.