Week of July 17, 2000

I was checking out a new apartment the other day, and this was the real estate agent that showed me the place.  She tried to impress me by says that the building has all new plumbing.  Of course, I impressed her by telling her that I really liked to 'lay some pipe'.  I'm still waiting to hear if I got the place.

I just rented 'American Pie' the other day.  After seeing Shannon Elizabeth in it, hell I'd hump a Hostess Fruit Pie to get some of that ass!

Sure, St. Patrick chased the snakes out of Ireland.  But I've got one 'snake' that wouldn't mind getting back into 'this' Ireland!

That ain't the only thing that's up! 
---EaRL

BACK

This is the new bartender down at the "Chug-A-Lug".  She kept giving me double Jack-n-Cokes for the price of a single.  So at the end of the night, I told her to come back to my place if she wanted a 'big tip'....too bad she had the owner ban me from the place!