vic
journal
bio
music
email

jen
journal
bio
music
email


sarah
journal
bio
music
email

kate
journal
bio
music
email


features
forum
friends
about
links
piccies
home

superkate: journal

supervic | superjen | supersar | superkate


090601 » don't forget your friends

listening to | rage on jjj (my tv is busted remember)
feeling | drunk

the early hours of saturday morning... (2am)

i got home about two hours ago... drunk. i sat down at the computer to make a dick of myself in front of my friends, only to find none of them online. i thought this would give me an opportunity to put down in words the things that have been playing on my mind since a conversation with my friend andrew this evening. i opened notepad... then nick, vic and glenny aaall came online! how is a girl supposed to write her drunken musings when she is also trying to talk to 3 people at once??

...but they all just left and i'm now feeling rather sober and the thoughts that were running round my muddled brain seem to have all but vanished... but i shall try my best.

first let me recount tonight's events.

i ran to the train station to catch a train to newcastle straight after getting home from work (well maybe 5 mins after, i had to get changed first). one of my bestest buddies, ang, picked me up from the station in newcastle as we were planning on going to dinner with our friends brodie and sandy. none of us ever get to see ang anymore. she is a working gal and when she has time off she tries to spend it with her boyfriend, which i completely understand.

when i jumped in the car ang informed me that sandy was sick and didn't want to go out, but that we could still go around to her place before dinner. she also told me it seemed brodie had thought we had cancelled and had made other plans (i later got a call from brodie while we were in the bottlo - brodie's mobile was broken and she had received none of our messages).

so, ang and i headed to sandy's. because everyone had bailed we decided to get some take away italian from the kick arse italian restaurant around the corner from sandy's place. while waiting for our food we headed to the bottlo where we then spent the next 20 mins trying to decide on a bottle of wine each. yum. wine.

we got back to sandy's just in time for big brother. we all sat around talking, eating italian, drinking wine and watching crap tv for couple of hours. sandy then had to go to work (at macca's. before she left i told her i hoped she got more than one guy asking her for a blow job tonight. a 24 hour macca's is the best place to meet seedy, sleazy, drunk guys according to sandy) and left us to tape cant hardly wait (we spent the whole time trying to remember what other movies we had seen all of the characters in) for her. haha. then drew rang.

andrew is another friend i don't get to see very much anymore. bloody ex engineers! we told him to come over and to bring another bottle of wine and some chocolate with him. he was there within half an hour with the requested bottle of wine and a block of peppermint chocolate! needless to say, drew was greeted very warmly and was engulfed by a rather drunken hug from myself.

so, after consuming a number of bottles of wine (and a block of chocolate), ang's boyfriend came over just in time for the end of the movie and took her home (his parents are away for the weekend and they were very happy bout that. hehe). that left me and drew. this is where stuff got a little more interesting (besides me complaining to ang about my nonexistant love life and ang asking her boyfriend if he had any friends i didn't know that they could set me up with. thanks for that ang. :P oh, and ang has told me that i am no longer allowed to become involved with internet guys. she told me i need to find a new way to meet men - easy to say, coming from a girl who has been with the same guy for a year and a half. but anyhoo, what ang says is law. sowwy internet suitors. ;))

... anyhoo, no, drew and i did not declare our undying love for each other. as he walked me to the train station, we had one of those conversations that makes you really question your life and your future. it was really bizarre. or maybe that was the alcohol talking. i don't know.

he said the thought of leaving uni and never seeing any of us again was really depressing him. he will be part time at uni next year, while working. the year after, he will be working in sydney. i tried to encourage him by telling him i was planning on moving to sydney as soon as i finished my course and that there was no way we would ever lose contact! there are just some people from uni you never want to lose contact with. i have realised drew is one of those people for me.

so, after going on for a bit about how we will have to get together for drinks, etc when we both move to sydney, drew started to get serious again.

he realised that getting a job meant responsibility. responsibility means maturity. it dawned on him that he will be 23 soon and that the time is coming for him to find a serious girlfriend, get married, have kids and live a mundane existence in a job that he may well not find to be fulfilling.

he has realised that the only way to make sure his life remains interesting is to always have a major goal to work towards. this goal used to be to become ruler of the world... until he realised that once you are there, people who disagree with your decisions give you a hard time, while everyone else just sucks up your arse. and then when you go and have 15 million people killed 'for the betterment of the people' someone gets their panties in a bunch and calls it genocide. so are the woes of being the ruler of earth. andy decided this may not be for him afterall and that perhaps he should look towards a more realistic long term goal.

well, drew got me thinking. well freaking, rather. marriage? kids? these things had never really held much significance for me. i am career oriented (or maybe i just say that to sound mature. at the moment i feel like i am actually more 'fun' oriented) first and foremost. if someone i love enough to spend the rest of my life with (and who can put up with me) comes along, then that is great. kids? well, that is just gonna hurt way too much! hehe.

my goals are all so short term. i've never really thought very far into the future. i want to finish uni as soon as possible, get fairly good results and then go out and get a tops job with heaps of perks that will allow me to travel. they are my goals. i haven't really thought about much else.

but the thing that drew said that really kept playing on my mind was the whole losing contact with friends thing. i guess this is because my friends are such an important part of who i am and i already feel like i am beginning to lose some of them. i never see the three people who i feel closest too. this upsets me a lot. i feel it with many of my other friends also. guys i used to see two or three times a week to go drinking with and share laughs and memories with. i feel like i don't know them anymore. they have these lives that i have nothing to do with. i see them and have no idea who they are dating, how uni is going for them, etc.

imagine what it will be like when we all start to leave uni.

i'm just happy the internet is such a popular medium now. at least we will always have email, if nothing else.

well, i had heaps more i felt like writing about, but i feel like i'm about to broach the way too personal scale, so i will leave it at that. plus, this is too long already and you are no doubt bored... and it is now nearly 3am! eeek! there goes half of tomorrow!

and yes, i felt really, really bad about about going out tonight! i did absolutely no study today!!

so guys, don't forget your friends. the ones who have always been there for you in the past. the ones you shared all those memories with. no matter how distant they seem.

god i feel like jerry springer now.

to see pics of me with andy, ang, brodie and sandy, click
here.

weeks without a cigarette: 7 tomorrow

previous | next