From: Suzy (
Subject: That point...
Date: 2003-03-21 12:05:25 PST

Today, I feel great. Besides feeling a bit lightheaded, I feel good. The
sun is shining, the air is warm. It feels like such a nice day to just lie
in the sun. To quote Richie Tenenbaum, "I am going to kill myself

My boyfriend is going out of town, so he won't interrupt. He has a key to
my apt. and he is welcome to come in anytime. He will be out of town as to
not disturb anything... I am thinking of going somewhere else, though, just
to be on the safe side, seeing as how I have a couple of friends who are in
town who are worried about me and might barge in.

My chosen method is Potassium Cyanide. I've purchased a pH meter so I can
be sure that the KCN+H2O concoction isn't too basic/acidic for my throat.
I've stopped eating so my tummy will be nice and acidic (see: Dave
Conibear, 1992, ASH) and I've stopped taking my meds so I'm not happy and
decide that life is worth living. I will just get down again someday... I
am preventing that.

Now I'm just left with writing a note. It will be tough and I am not
looking forward to it. The email to the police dept. (time delayed, of
course) will be easy, as it will be just the technical details. But to my
parents, I don't know what to write. It will be particularly tough on my
father as he lost his father less than a week ago. Hell, it will be tough
on everyone, and I feel really bad for that.

Eh, whatever happens, happens.

I will continue talking to you ashers until I leave, but I will let you
know. John, keep trying to catch me online, I promise we'll talk before I
do it.

Suzy P.S. I am at work, the keyboard here functions well.