irish
The birds
Two Irishmen walk into a pet shop. Right away they go over to the bird
section.Gerry says to Paddy, "Dat's dem". The clerk comes over and asks if
he can help them. "Yeah, we'll take four of dem dere birds in dat cage op
dere," says Gerry, "Put dem in a peeper bag." The clerk does and the two
guys pay for the birds and leave the shop.
They get into Gerry's van and drive until they are high up in the hills and
stop at the top of a cliff with a 500-foot drop. "Dis looks loike a grand
place, eh?" says Gerry. "Oh, yeh, dis looks good," replies Paddy.
They flip a coin and Gerry wins the toss. "I guess I git to go first, eh
Paddy?" says Gerry. He then takes two birds out of the bag, places them on
his shoulders and jumps off the cliff.
Paddy watches as his mate drops off the edge and goes straight down for a
few seconds followed by a 'SPLAT'. As Paddy looks over the edge of the cliff
he shakes his head and says, "Fock dat, dis budgie jumpin' is too fockin'
dangerous for me"
======- PART TWO =======
A minute later, Seamus arrives. He too has been to the pet shop and he walks
up carrying the familiar 'peeper bag'. He pulls a parrot out of the bag,
and then Paddy notices that, in his other hand, Seamus is carrying a gun.
"Hi, Paddy. Watch this," Seamus says and launches himself over the edge of
the cliff. Paddy watches as half way down, Seamus takes the gun and blows
the parrot's head off. Seamus continues to plummet until there is a SPLAT!,
as he joins Gerry's remains at the bottom. Paddy shakes his head and says,
"An' oim never troyin' dat parrotshooting nider"
======- PART THREE =======
A few minutes after Seamus splats himself Sean strolls up. He too has been
to the pet shop and he walks up carrying the familiar 'peeper bag'. Instead
of a parrot he pulls a chicken out of the bag, and launches himself off the
cliff with the usual result.
Once more Paddy shakes his head - "Fock me Sean, first der was Gerry wit
his budgie jumping, den Seamus parrot shooting and now you blimmin' hen gliding"