By: KnightObiWan@aol.com
Originally Posted on May 31, 2000
Qui-Gon cut the transmission to Tatooine. Obi-Wan's parents had been sad. His mother had even begun to cry, but the Jedi Master knew as well as they that they did not know their son. They saw him for a week every few years if Obi-Wan's schedule allowed. They were sad to hear that their son had died, but they would be unable to morn for the child the did not know. If anyone, Owen, Obi-Wan's younger brother had been the most upset that his idolized Jedi brother was dead. Sighing, Qui-Gon got up from the terminal and moved into the kitchen, opening and closing cabinets, half-heartedly searching for something to eat. Blindly, he removed a few items and began to heat something up. A skittering sound dragged his attention away from the stove. Obi-Wan's Kriskin ferret Star, so named for the star-shaped spot between her ears, had heard movement in the kitchen and came to catch crumbs.
Qui-Gon had told his Padawan that he should have named her Vacuum. While Obi-Wan had never shown much connection to the Living Force, Star was one creature that the boy had felt drawn to. A vendor at a market on Maltom Major had been selling them. Star had crawled out of the basket and into Obi-Wan's lap. At the time, Qui-Gon had told himself that he had bought her for him to help Obi-Wan develop his sense of the Living Force. In truth, the smile on the boy's face and joy that he felt from him had made it impossible to walk away without the animal. Shaking himself awake, he turned back to dinner... and stopped. He was making wurthian noodles, Obi-Wan's favorite.
Qui-Gon's stomach rolled and he threw the food in the recycler. He picked up Star and held her as he walked away from the kitchen. Obi-Wan's door stood open, the darkness inside ominous. He walked towards the room and flipped the lights on. The room was as it always had been. Qui-Gon sat down on the edge of the bed. He had sent the clothes to the boy's family. Bant, Garen, and Reeft had each politely asked for one small thing to remember their friend by, and he had given Arica the holo he had found. Other than that, the room was untouched. Obi-Wan's model ships hung from hooks in the ceiling. Qui-Gon grinned. The models had been standard toys, but Obi-Wan had rigged each one with spare parts. Each one of them flew under their own power. He remembered the care his Padawan had taken, making sure each was just right. At the front hung a 347 Raider, the pride of his collection.
Obi-Wan was all around him. His laughter was in the walls, ringing when his latest practical joke on his Master succeeded. His tears were in his pillow, falling from nightmares. His dreams were in the air of the day when he would become a Knight himself…and none of it mattered any more. He was startled to find his face wet, as tears he didn't realize he had left made their way down his face. Star had fallen asleep in his arms. Carefully, he laid her down in her pen beside the bed, then laid down himself on his Padawan's bed, held the boy's pillow close to his chest, and fell into a troubled sleep.
*****
Slowly, Obi-Wan Kenobi could feel consciousness returning to him. The first thing he was aware of was pain. Everything seemed to hurt, from his toenails to his eyelashes. Even his mind ached.
//Master?// he reached for that place in his mind that always brought him comfort, the strong, bright presence of his Master... and in that spot, he found only Darkness. Shock yanked him painfully into full consciousness. His arms were lashed behind his back and his feet were tied together. Tape covered his eyes and his mouth. Obi-Wan reached out with his mind. The Force was still with him... but his Master was not. What had happened? He remembered...
"Master says to get to the emergency hatch!" he yelled to the nearest crewman.
"This way!" the man grabbed his arm and pulled him along a corridor, the rest of Palpatine's men behind them. Obi-Wan's internal direction told him this wasn't the way.
"Where are we going?"
"This way's quicker! Trust me!" There was no time to argue, so the Padawan followed. They twisted left and turned right... right into a dead end.
"What's this?" his voice was commanding.
"Trust me, we're almost there!"
He felt his Master's touch, //Yes Master, we're waiting righ...// A bright hot flashed seared across his vision. Pain filled his consciousness... and then all was dark.
So where was he now, and where was Qui-Gon? Force don't let him be dead. Even thinking of it brought tears to his eyes that could not fall for the tape that held them shut. He heard a door in front of him open and felt light on his face.
"Finally awake, are we?" The hairs on the back of his neck stood up at the hissing voice and involuntary shivers traversed his spine. He could feel the Darkness in the person before him. It sucked all the warmth from the room and shadowed even the brightest light. Footsteps echoed, coming closer to him. Someone was kneeling right in front of him. His breath quickened. Ice cold fingertips stroked his cheek.
"Welcome to your new life... my young apprentice."
Obi-Wan jerked away from the hand and tried to speak, "Mmph umph um." Sharply, the tape was ripped away. He had to keep himself from yelping at the pain, "I'm not your apprentice." He told the shadow in a strong, confident voice, "Where is my Master?"
"Your Master?" The tone was innocent, "My boy, your Master has left you."
"You're lying."
"Am I? Please, surely you knew it was but a matter of time before he decided you were too much of a burden to keep around. You never deserved a Master such as Qui-Gon Jinn. You honestly believe you're good enough to warrant one of the best and most revered Masters in the Order? My dear boy I fear you have an over-inflated opinion of yourself."
"Master Qui-Gon would never leave me," Obi-Wan repeated, but his voice was not so confident this time.
"He wouldn't? And why not? Because he loves you as a son? Because he needs you at his side? Because you provide invaluable insight at negotiations. Please, you delude yourself. How many times has he had to put his life at risk to save you? How many times has a mission been endangered because of your actions? I'm surprised he put up with you for this long. You've been nothing but a burden to him, even before he relented to your childish persistence for him taking you as a Padawan."
"That's not true," Obi-Wan whispered, but it was more to himself than to the person speaking.
"I think we both know it is. Why, you weren't even chosen until after your thirteenth birthday. You're a pity Padawan, nothing more, and he finally discovered a way to be rid of you. Fortunately for you, I was able to rescue you from that ship before it exploded."
"Wh... what?"
"Goodness, you are slow. The navicomputer on the ship was malfunctioning? How often does that happen... and quite near to Alderaan too? How fortuitous that your Master has an old friend their with a spaceworthy ship. Then, a ship 'suddenly' comes out of hyperspace and begins firing on an unscheduled vessel with no warning or no reason? Foolish boy. No, no such string of events occurs by accident." The man paused, letting the Padawan consider his words. The only sign that the boy had heard any of it was his quickened breath. "If you will not believe me, then perhaps you will believe your Master." He produced a small recorder from his pocket. Obi-Wan heard the click of the button and Qui-Gon's recorded voice.
"Reil, old friend, is everything prepared for me?"
"All is ready. Where is he?"
"The whelp had a nightmare. He's fast asleep. He won't suspect a thing. I can't thank you enough for this."
"What have I always told you? It is I that owe you. If getting this nuisance out of your life is a favor, then it is one I gladly give you." He shut the recording off.
The boy remained silent, but he saw his jaw tensed, the muscle in his face twitching as he clenched his teeth.
"If that does not convince you, stupid boy, then consider this... who is the only person that can sever a bond between Master and Padawan? If I'm not mistaken, I believe the answer is... only the Master." And with that, Obi-Wan felt the man back away and heard the door close behind him.
It couldn't be true. Qui-Gon loved him. His Master cared for him, and he would never try to hurt him... but wasn't it true that he had only been chosen after his birthday. He had had to beg for Qui-Gon to take him on. His Master had never fully trusted him, not even after their relationship had gotten better in the past year. He always felt in the way on missions and at Council. He was always one step behind, one thought too late. He wasn't dependable. He couldn't be counted on. He was a burden to his Master... and his Master was glad to be rid of him. Despite the tape that kept his tears from falling, Obi-Wan couldn't stop the sobs that overcame him. He was alone.
TBC...
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