Too many nights without sleep and too many early morning wake-ups are making me feel like a coloring book with all its pictures colored outside the lines. Blurry... definitely blurry. So maybe its due to my blurry morning that there seem to be more questions then usual that make me ask... why....

Here are some things that make me ask why...

1) Why does my milk taste like mint this morning?

2) Why are there black dirt specks on my kitchen floor?

3) Why are the black specks moving?

4) Why does time speed up when I'm running late?

5) Why do cars on the highway speed up to pass me, only to get in front of me and slow down?

6) Why do people feel the need to slow down at stare at the poor jamoke that got pulled over for speeding?

7) Why do we have to loose power when its like a thousand degrees outside?

8) Why does the elevator break down and make me climb five flights of stairs to my office when I'm the most tired?

9) Why does each customer feel the need to tell me the elevator isn't working and grumble that they had to walk up five flights of stairs?

10) Why do my customers rush up 5 flights of stairs and then pant hot breath all over me?

11) Why don't more people brush their teeth?

12) Why do people who are paying with checks feel the need to put their check in an envelope and then lick it shut before they hand it to me, just to watch me reopen it?

13) Why do people who like to make ass-gaskets feel the need to leave toilet paper all over the toilet seat when they are done?

14) Why do people continue to pound on the office door, even when the shades are pulled and the office is clearly closed?

15) Why does my husband like to make Star Trek sounds whenever he glides into a lane with bumper to bumper traffic?

Now of course I don't know all the answers. But here is what I have figured out...

1) If your milk tastes like mint, ask your son where he stuck his chewed gum.

2 and 3) If tiny black specks are moving on your kitchen floor, buy some ant spray, because you have been invaded.

4) Time isn't really speeding up, I'm just slowing down.

5 and 6), I have no clue

7 and 8) Murphy's law

9), people want to make sure you know their pain.

10 and 11), again, clueless

12 and 13) - I am chalking these up to lessons learned in math class when you were taught to show your work.

14) This is either because they are in denial that they came all this way for nothing, or they are living in their egocentric bubble which tells them that the world revolves around them, in which case if they pound on the door loud enough it will eventually open for them.

15) Because life's little, "Why?" questions can make me cranky and Lucan loves to make me laugh.