My Cock

by Evil Eggplant

My COCK is Large and In Charge. In fact, it is so Large and In Charge, that it causes my brain to shut down, and, no matter what I try, I find myself huddled in the corner, uncontrollably touching myself. My COCK says, "Yank me off! Come on, jerk it harder!" and I say, "Yes, yes," and whack it some more. In fact, the other day, I found myself in just such a situation during school, crouching like a madman in the corner playing with my COCK, causing the nice teacher-lady to say, "That's a nice COCK you got there, sonny boy". So I said, "Nice TWAT, Miss Teacher-Lady." And she got ready to pull up her dress. I was feelin' all good, and ready to fuck there, and think how flabbergasted I was when I saw her pull out a big-ass schlong! There was no TWAT under there! So, needless to say, my COCK suddenly died, right there. Imagine how I felt, standing there with my COCK lying limp across my tennis shoes, with nothing to fuck, no cunt or snatch, not even a little quim, even though this person with her knickers down was supposedly meant to be a female. I mean, she had BREASTESIES and all. So I, being an intelligent man with a large COCK, formulated a plan: I escaped out the window, and landed upon a cow. I had no problems sticking my Big (but not so fat as the teacher's) COCK in that cow's TWAT. Now, I porked her for a while, and, after I was done, she orgasmed and her TWAT tickled my COCK, which I enjoyed immensely. Then the principal came by and he said, "Son, are you screwin' Bessie the School Cow?" And I said, "Yes, sir, I am, and I enjoy it!" "Well, son, you're going to O.C.P., you cattle-screwing COCK-maniac!" And, so, my COCK, being In Charge at this point, said, "Cum in the principal's eye! Just knock you a cumquat right in the left eyeball!" So I aimed and took fire. Now, the principal DIED (pierced his brain, that cumquat did), and I was arrested. I went to jail. Big guy named Bubba next to me looked over and said, "You got COCK problems? I got COCK problems too. My COCK tells me to do something, and I do it. Why, just the other day, my COCK said, 'Screw Grandmama', and so I had to screw Grandmama. So I solved it, all right-- I decided to lead the campaign against COCKs. Taking my MEAT CLEAVER out, I deCOCKitated everyone in the state! And thus I am in jail for MUTILATION... and, like, some people died, but that's... not my concern; I'm just worried about the COCKs dying." And he said, "Boy, you're lucky I haven't got my knife, but I'll do it the old-fashioned way and RIP your COCK off!" So he comes rushing at me, that big man named Bubba, and I was going, "Oh my god! He's gonna kill me and rip my COCK off!" But my COCK had a better idea. It stiffened up, and I was a-fencing! A stab there, a swipe there, and then he threw a jab and I parried... with my COCK. After a while, I wore him down and beat him soundly in the FACE... with my giant COCK (but not so giant and big as the teacher's COCK). Well, after I beat him down, I knocked his teeth in, shattered his nose and stuck my COCK up his right nostril and my ball-sac in his mouth. You may ask why I did this. I don't know why my COCK told me to do it. So after I got done enjoying the pleasures of the mouth, and the nostril, I removed my COCK, being a little chafed as it was, and stuck it back in my pants. Then the policeman came to me and said, "Sonny, you got a new cellmate." And in came my teacher with her Big, Fat COCK. And then she looked at me and said, "Honey, I've been watchin' you ever since I saw you BEATIN' your MEAT in the corner that one day." And I said, "Lawdy, Lawd, help me! My COCK is exhausted and I don't know what to do!" To which the teacher said, "I'll tell you what to do, Boy-- BEND 'EM OVER!" And then so I TRIED to climb through the window, but it had bars on it. And I was pulled down, and I felt this Giant, Big, Fat COCK enter my BUTTOCKS. And I cried in pain, and, when she jizzed, I died. Her jizz knocked my spinal cord straight out'n my head, leaving a giant bloody smear. And Big Bubba, the anti- COCK man, soon castrated my teacher. But he kept the BREASTESIES to CHEW ON when he was BORED. 'Cause, you know, some people like that.

That was THE END of the COCK story.