DAY OF THE MONKEE

by T'Monkleelover

Amy walks happily into the Pad, where Peter Tork is eating some cereal. Hi Peter guess what! LOOK!" she cooed. Peter looked up and his jaw dropped open when he saw what she revealed. A couple of Froot Loops dropped back into the bowl and made little spashing noises that you could hear because it was so quiet. Ecxept for they were breathing. "Amy for ME?!?!?" Peter shouted happily? he jumped up and ran to her. She sighed in deep throatyish pleasure and shivered when she saw his desire and that he had forgot all about his cereal in his excitement. "Yes Peter, all for you, top to bottom. I wanted you to have this for so long but I was afraid you didn't want..."

"Amy you know I love..." Peter runs out of words as he touches Amy's pinwheel. "It's so shiny" he breathed.

"I had to save up for it for three weeks. Go ahead, take it, it's all yours."

Peter holds the pinwheel reverently. "It...it's the one that was in the window at Throckmeistersonsteenburgen-Smythe's hardware store!"

"Yes Peter. It is."

Just then Mike Nesmith, Mickey Dolenz and Davy Jones burst into the Pad and they were shouting. "PETER PETER IT'S GONE! SOMEBODY BOUGHT THE PINWHEEL WE WANTED THE ONE IN THE THROCKMEISTERSONSTEENBURGEN-SMYTHE'S HARDWARE STORE WINDOW!" They tried to stop but they were running to fast and they all fell in a heap right on there faces right there in the kitchen! Kerplop! Boy were they embarrassed! Because Amy was there and she saw them fall and try to get up, but it was hard because they're arms and legs are all tangled up. But then they get all sorted out. and they were standing up and they saw pEter holding the PINWHEEL!

Peter you have the pinweel that was in the window at Throckmeistersonsteenburgen-Smythe's hardware store!" Micky said.

"no I don't. Said Peter. "This is for moles."

"Yes, you do. It's right there. That's the pinwheel that was in the window at Throckmeistersonsteenburgen-Smythe's hardware store. I reconize the wood grain patern in the handel." Said Mickey again! "And besides we live on the beach we dont have moles."

"Oh." Peter look down at the handel guiltily.

"I have a mole," offered Davy.

"Shut up" Mike said. He looked really upset. "you know how long I've been saving up for that pinwheel. How come you bought it?"

Peter looked angry now. "I didn't! I'd never never, never!"

"Well its here and you have it you had to get it somehow."

"I gave it to him!" exclamed Amy, and then Davy started crying and ran into the bathrooom. "I guess you boys have something to discuss I have to go wash my curlers now bye. See you later, Peter!!" She waved to Peter and blew him a kiss as she swished out. All the Monkees watched her go. (Davy was watched her from the bathroom window, then started crying again. Because she left without specifically saying goodbye to him.)

"See what you did? You made Davy cry!!" exclamed Mike.

"Yeah you need to apologize to him" added Mickey!

"I... I will not!" exclamed Peter defiantedly. "Its his fault he crys all the time."

An audible gasp that was so loud they could even hear it filled the room, and the crying in the bathroom grew even louder!

"Shut up, Peter!"

"I will not!"

"If you dont, I'll make you!"

"Oh yea, you and who else"?

"There is 2 of us and only one of you!"

"I'll never give you the pinwheel!"

With that Mike tried to grab it from Peter. Peter held onto his end however and Mike could not take it from him. Micky pushed Peter away, and the next thing you know, all the Monkees are in a pile, pulling hair and kicking and scratching! And the pinwheel goes sailing out of the pile and lands in front of the bathroom door!

Davy flung open the door resoundedly and grabbed it. "Its mine! I have it! he yelled and ran outside. It was a very windy day, so the pinwheel started spinning hard, shining britely in the sunshine while Davy ran as fast as he could onto the beach!

So Davy ran as fast as he could onto the beach and the wind was blowing as fast as it could and the pinwheel was spinning so fast as it could and Davy laughed and laughed!

"'ee 'ee 'ee! I 'ave the pinw'eel! Its all mine! 'a 'a 'a!!!"

When he was really far away from the Pad so far away the he could hardly even see it anymore he flopped down in the sand and watching the pinwheel spin and spin. He thought how he was the cutest Monkee because he was always thinking that but he thought also about how he was the smartest and sexest and much more talenteder than Peter Tork, Micky Dolenz, and even Mike Nesmith, their leader.

"Im a really good singer he says to the pinwheel "and my tamborine shaking is really groovy! I should dump those other guys and be a solo!" The pinwheel spun around like it agreed with him that he was the smartest and sexiest and talentedest so Davy started singing really loud! "Hey hey I'm the Monkee! People say I monkee around! But I'm too busy singing! To put anybody down!"

Singing that made him really happy so he begun shaking his butt and hitting himself like he had his tamborine. Then he wished he had his tamborine or something to shake like that so he picked up the pinwheel and shook it while he was singing some more.

"Im just trying to be freindly! Come and watch me sing and play! I'm the young genration! And Ive got something to say!"

Then he stopped singing because he always forgot the words after that and he wished Mike Nesmith was there to remind him but then he thought I don't need Mike and besides he's always calling me babe as if I'm a girl or a baby. Poop on 'im!

Suddenly, the other 3 Monkees came running on the beach shouting his name.

"Davy!
"Davy!
"Davy!"

And then Davy got scared because he knew they wanted the pinwheel but it was so shiny and nice and his. But he knew it he didnt share it with the other 3 Monkees it wouldnt be nice. He thought he would cry but surprise he didn't feel like crying he felt like fighting! Im sick of being nice! he thought! I wish I had a big stick or something like that for hurting so I could keep the pinwheel for always!

And then suddenly in his hand like magic was his tamborine!!!

But not really his tamborine because all the jangly things were really sharp.

WOW!!!

But then the other 3 Monkees were really close and all of a sudden they were different angry and mad. And Micky's hair was curly. And Micky had a drumstick but it was as big as a club and Peter's fingernails were really longer and hard plastic like mean giutar picks and Mike had a microphone and he was swinging the cord like he was going to bonk Davy Jones with it!!!

But Davy was scared of them! Davy ran and ran and ran down the beach, waveing the pinwheel in front of him and laughing nastyly. The other Monkees followed Mike Nesmith, their leader, and chased after Davy, waving the club and the microphone and Peter waved his hands.

Suddenly there was a big roar of engines and six big motorcycles screetched to a halt on the sand, and Davy got knocked over by them and the pinwheel went sailing again, right into the hand of the leader of the gang. It was Captain Uhura! And her All-Girl Band!

"I'll take that, thank you, sugar," she laughed and jumped off her big motocycle. She was wearing a tiny red minnie skirt and a teeny red shirt with no sleeves and a big gold belt and her hair was teased up into a really big beehive hairdo. All of the Monkees looked at her and fell in love right away.

Now *I* have the pinwheel!" she said victorously and kicked some sand in Davy's face just to be sure. "You Monkees may have beaten us at the Battle of the Bands last week, but this week my All-Girl Band will kick your skinny white behinds!"

"YEAH!" said her All-Girl Band, which was Christine (the blond one), Helen (the tough one), Janice (the other blond one who wasn't as tall as Christine and had the complicated hairdo), Marlena (the slutty one), and Mira (the dumb one). They all played different instruments and thought they could do anything better than boys. (they were right)

Davy was still lying in the sand and was crying really hard because he had lost the pinwheel and also he has sand in his eyes. He jumped up and tried to take the pinwheel away from Captain Uhura but Helen kicked him hard and he fell down again and cryed even harder. The other Monkees ran to his rescue.

"You made Davy cry harder!!"" Micky yelled!

"Like I care," Captain Uhura said.

"Give us back the pinwheel!!!" cried out Peter. Micky said it too.

"NO WAY" said the All-Girl Band together.

"GIVE IT BACK" Davy Cried.

"WAIT! We have to stop this fighting! Don't you see, there's only one pinwheel and we can't all have it! Why can't we just-" Mike started to say.

"Shut up MIKE!!!'' everyone yelled at him.

Then Capatin Uhura pulled a long shiny knife out of her thigh-high leather boot. "Any of you pussies want to take it away from me, you just try." Then her All-Girl Band lined up behind her and pulled their knives out of their boots. Even thought the Monkees had their music weapons, the Monkees didn't have any knives and they were scared.

"Ha! I knew you didn't have any balls," Captain Uhura said. She smiled in a way that was cruel and sexy all at the same time. No wonder they fell in love with her.

"Can we cut them anyway?" Helen asked?

"Can we take them home as pets?" Janice asked.

"Can we make them strip naked and have sex with each other?" Marlena asked.

Mira and Christine were too busy fixing their lipstick to ask questions.

"What a lot of choices! Well, I think we should..." Captain Uhura trailed off with her voice.

The Monkees were REALLY Scared now! What will happen next???

"...use them for our pleasure." Uhura licked her lips and continued, "If they're any good at it, that is."

"So we can make them strip naked and have sex with us!" cried Marlena.

Mira gestured to Christine and said, "We'll sit this one out. We just fixed our lipstick."

Uhura walked menacingly toward the Monkees and waved the pinwheel in front of their faces. As their eyes glazed over, the musical weapons fell from their hands into the sand at their feet. "Okay boys, let's see what you've got. Strip. Now!"

The Monkees hustled to obey, their eyes never leaving the shininess of the pinwheel they each coveted. Individual thoughts, like, 'how far will I go to get the pinwheel?' never crossed their minds. Instead, they practically tore off their clothes and moved closer to the pinwheel.

"Back off, guys!" Uhura shouted.

Helen said loudly, "Doesn't look like much."

Janice walked over and whispered into Uhura's ear. This caused the sexy leader of the All-Girl Band to wave the pinwheel at the boys and order, "Get 'em up, guys. Make 'em hard and *maybe* we won't hurt you...too much." She laughed and her band laughed too.

The guys moved in slow motion as if they were jacking off in a four-foot tall vat of lime jello, but soon their manhoods were standing at attention. All except Davy's. Uhura circled them and noticed the little Englishman's puffy eyes and semi-limp member. She aimed a booted foot at his little English ass and connected with such force that he yelped.

"Get a move on, Limey! I've got plans for you." She came back around the front and stroked his chest with the prickly edges of the pinwheel. That seemed to get a response and she purred, "So you like it rough, eh? We can do rough. Right girls?"

"RIGHT!" The All-Girl Band cheered.

"Lets roll," Captin Uhura said jauntingly. The other girls put the naked Monkees on the backs of their big mean motorcycles, except Davy, because Uhura wanted him to herself, because he was only as tall as she was, which wasn't very tall, about five foot four, which meant she could boss him around pretty easy and not have to look up to give him her cruel and sexy glare. So Davy went with the Captain. She stuck the pinwheel between his butt cheeks and itspun around really fast all the way to their Pad.

The Pad was the place that the All-Gril Band lived in, but it wasn't the same as the Monkees Pad, which was a guy palce and was full of dirty laundary and no food. This Pad was really cool, with lots of fakey leopard-skin furniture and cans of Aqua-Net. So then the girls threw the Monkees on the white shag carpet - even Davy, but Uhura had to kick him agaiun to keep him from running into the bathroom crying - and Uhrua said, "Now, you will serve us! You will all do whatever we want until we get tired of you! And you won't wear any clothes!"

The Monkees all gulped and looked at each other. They were still scared, but inside they were all thinking that this sounded pretty good.

"And now, my little pets, you better get started serving us. Stand up!" They did. "Walk to that door!" They did again. "And PAINT MY KTICHEN!!"

So for a week the Monkees lived with the All-Firl band and did everything that they wanted, what the girls wanted, not what the Monkees wanted. They cooked and cleaned and paintd their toenails and tuned their instruments and put air in the tires of their motorcycles, all the time naked, and at night they all had sex with different girls all night long which you could read about if I was a better writer, and if they didn't do a good job they got spanked in front of the others, except Davy, who got spanked every dsay whether he needed it or not, becayse it was so much fun to spank his little English butt.

At the end of the week Peter Tork said, "Guys where is the pinwheel?"

:What pinwheel?" they asked him back.

"You know the one that we all wanted so much. Gee I kinda forgot about it now that we're living with the All-Girl band and doing everything they want. Maybe that was the prupose of the pinwheel, to bring us two bands together." Peter was always saying this kind of hippy-dippy stuff but maybe this time he is right.

"I dunno, Peter. That kind of stuff only happens on TV," Micky said musingly, fingering the new leather dog collar around his neck.

"The pinwheel is gone. I took it back to Throckmeistersonsteenburgen-Smythe's hardware store. And I ran into your girlfriend Amy on the way back and I kicked her butt," Uhura said. Peter was secretly happy. "So you see we really didn't need the pinhweel at all." Uhura smiled her secret smile at them and they fell in love all over again.

But then the phone rang really loudly and made everyone jump off the fakey leopard-skin pillows. Marlena asnwerd it and then looked worried at Uhura. "Captain, there's trouble! We're needed!" She said this because the All-Girl band was really super-secret space spies in disguise and they had just gotten a call from James T. Kirk, the most famous intergalatic playboy, soldier, diplomat, polo player, super-secret space spy, and all-around he-man, and now they had to go away on their big motorcycles and help him save the world. But they didn't tell the Monkees any of that. They just kissed them goodbye and threw them out of the house and gave them bus fare home to their own stinky Pad.

"Oh well I guess it's back to being the Monkees again," Mike Nesmith, their leader said.

"I liked it better when we were their Monkees," Davy said, rubbing his sore bottom.

"Well, maybe we will get to be their Monkees again. We should just sit here and wait for them to come back." Peter offered.

"But I can't sit down!" wailed Davy. "My rear end hurts too much!"

Mickey laughed and said, "Serves you right. The three of us will wait here and you can go back to the pad and cry in the bathroom."

Davy couldn't wait to get home, so he started to cry right then. The others felt bad.

Peter Tork put his arm around Davy and said, "I know what we should do."

"What?" sniveled Davy.

"We should go down to Throckmeistersonsteenburgen-Smythe's hardware store and buy the pinwheel for all of us to share!"

The other Monkees groaned and Davy cried even louder.

Then they went home naked and had cold cereal.

THE END